Sincere Harris
I placed some pearl earrings into my ear as I allowed a sigh to leave my lips. Nervous wasn't even the word as I thought about everything I would have to express within this court room today. Last night was the night I told Dre about Nahmir and in all honesty, he was livid. I never expected him to react the way he did, but at this point, he's going to have to accept it. No one seems to understand where my heart is completely and I'm still trying to understand it myself, but as a woman that has been through almost every struggle, I can't watch this little boy be put through hell. I just won't allow it. The words Dre said to me yesterday caught me off guard and they kept replaying in my head like a broken record.
"That's some bullshit. That's not my fuckin' son and that will never be my son."
I stared at myself in the mirror of the bathroom, gathering my thoughts as I allowed a heavy sigh to escape my lips. Today was the day I gave my testimony and lay my whole life out onto the table. Finishing everything pertaining to my looks, I headed back into my room to put on my Christian Louboutins, laced with the matching purse. Being sure that I had everything I would need, including my phone, I cut off the lights in my room and headed down the stairs of our home. Jayceon and Kaylani were in school, and of course, I had to be the last person to leave the house this morning. Nahmir was already at Mama Gina's House living the lifestyle. Baby fat on swole and face on beat, the perfect way to present myself.
The drive to the court house was short and of course, his trial was held at the Supreme Court. There's no doubt in my mind that all the odds are already against him, and after doing much calling around, I was able to get Adrianne, Harmony and Faith to all come down for this court case. It meant the most that Harmony and Faith would be able to come down here early, and hopefully, if Dre is released today, we can go ahead and finish the planning for the baby shower taking place next week. That will set the bar for my eighth month of pregnancy, leading up until the final due date.
Searching around for a parking space in the crowded downtown parking garages, I managed to find one relatively close to the court house and quickly occupied it, being sure to lock my doors using the beeper on the keychain. After situating my skirt on my ass for a moment, I made sure I had everything before taking the short walk across the street, silently praying.
"Lord, I know I may not come to you as often as I should, but all I'm asking is that you please just be with everyone in this court room today. I ask that you open their heart and mind to everything happening today and most importantly, I ask that you guide the man that I love. I pray that all hearts and minds are clear. In your son Jesus name we pray, amen."
I entered the court house with a very subtle look on my face, and a mindset of getting straight to the point. The double doors leading into the court room were opened for me by guards, and it seemed as if I'd arrived just on time. Reserved seating for Deandre's side of the family were the first two pews behind him, and all I could think about was how this court room resembled a church. It's amazing how in this exact set up, men and women fellowship for the man above, yet in this exact room, men and women are sometimes sentenced to losing their lives.
I took the seat that everyone left for me, right behind Dre and his eyes met mine as I settled into the seat. No words were exchanged, not even a few smiles. Meaningless glances covered our demeanors as we sat one behind the other, trying to ignore. It's amazing how after not seeing him for a couple of months, we can sit here and act as if we don't miss one another, but his pride is too high and mine just won't fly.
"Now introducing Judge Lucille Hamilton.", the officer standing in front of everyone shuffled over to the side of the room as a middle aged, African American woman came and took her place up front. She looked no older than forty and had a mean mug out of this world. Just by visualizing her face, I had no idea where this was going.
I watched as she sat at the table with the gavel and peered over everyone with a simple folder in her hand. The glasses that were plastered against the folder were removed, and she placed them onto her face, pushing her straightened, brown hair behind her ear. Everything about her made me question where this case would go, as I peered over her red fingernails and pearl earrings. She was the real definition of "black don't crack".
A piece of crumbled up paper flew past me, resembling a straw wrapper. Looking up, I squinted my eyes and rolled them as I peered over this pussy ass nigga. Raising my middle finger cautiously, I shot a bird at the bastard that got us in this situation from the beginning. Today draws the line to this bullshit, but honestly, this is just the beginning. If Dre is released, they will go into war and I would hate to see how bloody that bath is going to be.
"Case of Deandre Martin Vs. Troy Gilmore.", she stated, and that voice was damn near angelic. She looked so mean and she seemed so stern, but her voice was so calming and soothing. Something about this lady stood out to me, she might just be our saving grace.
Adrianne sat up front with Deandre, as she had taken the case into her own hands and settled on being his defense lawyer. After she'd gotten my dad off so many charges, I know for a fact she should be able to defend Dre in any way she knows how. She stood before him, along with Troy's defense lawyer and like clock work, they began going at one another's neck.
"My client here was merely trying to help his lover in a time of need. After everything that man has done to her, she needed him and he was willing to push that extra barrier. He clearly had no intentions of purposely harming Mr. Gilmore considering that Mr. Gilmore is sitting up right in his seat and is present at today's court case.", Adrianne spoke.
"Mr. Gilmore suffered two weeks of a coma and is now suffering from memory lost due to him going into shock after his gun wound. My client will have to endure therapy for the next six months and that will take a toll on his lifestyle.", Troy's lawyer counter-argued.
"Your client should have thought about that before he tried to sexually abuse Ms. Harris.", Adrianne argued, causing Mrs. Hamilton to slam her gavel down in aggravation.
"Order in the court!", she called out, before looking through some of the documents these two have been throwing at her over the past hour.
"Is Ms. Harris in the building as of the moment?", she asked, grasping my full attention once again.
"Yes, she is your honor.", Adrianne stated, taking a step over to reveal me seated behind Dre. He looked back at me with those eyes, causing mind to gloss over slightly. I'd been mentally preparing myself for this moment and now that it's here, I'm still not ready. "She's willing to give a testimony, speaking on whatever it would take for this case to be better understood."
"Is that true Ms. Harris?", the judge looked me in my eyes and in that moment, I knew this is what I had to do.
"Yes your honor.", I said, handing my purse over to Breanna as she looked at me with those same eyes. She nodded at me in approval as I rose from the pew, heading to the front of the court room where an officer was waiting with a bible. I was sworn in, and then placed at the spot right next to the judge. All eyes were on me, but my eyes were on my hands, they fiddled as I gathered myself and mentally prepared to be heartbroken all over again.
"So, Ms. Harris, can you explain to me your history with Mr. Gilmore?", Mrs. Hamilton asked, placing all of her attention on to me. Peering over to Dre, he just looked at me, as his eyes glossed over just as mine did. He mouthed the words "I love you." and I watched as he nodded his head for me to go on.
"When I first met Troy, I was young. A seventeen year old fresh out of high school with two children to take care of. I was working two jobs and I had to make sure my little brother and sister were fed. They were my main priorities. Day in and day out I would work, and one day he came into my restaurant down town with his construction site co workers. I took their order and for whatever reason, he couldn't take his eyes off of me. Many days after that, he would come into the store just to chat and finally, he built the courage to ask me out. He was nineteen at the time and even though I was young, he showed interest. Over time, I fell in love with him, and I accepted him for his flaws, one of which being a drug addiction to crack cocaine.", I paused, gathering my thoughts. "Eventually, he allowed my younger siblings and I to move in with him, once we were evicted from our home and I thought I had everything in order. We had a roof over our heads, I was working, keeping food on the table for not only my dependents, but also for him. After a year of living with him, I ended up eighteen and pregnant, but I was excited. After finding out I was three months pregnant, he was the first person I told, and his demeanor altered from there. It started with a push into the wall, triggered by simple things, such as not cooking something how he wanted it or not doing things exactly how he wanted it done. Those pushes, turned into slaps and eventually punches. He beat me so bad to the point that I got fired from both of my jobs due to me always being in the hospital."
"What rooted from these experiences Ms. Harris? What led up to this point?", she said, clearly wanting me to continue.
"I was no longer working, and it came to a point where I was depending on him. He would beat me to the point where I was sore, and my body was so warm down. The only thing that kept me pushing was my baby girl growing inside of me. The beating eventually emerged into sexual assault. He forced me to perform traditional and oral sex, no matter how much I refused, and then he did the inevitable.", I said, wiping a stray tear that fell from my face as I looked up at Troy as he stared at me in disbelief. Everyone watched me, with sympathetic looks on their faces. "He kneed me in my stomach, killing my baby girl. All I can remember was the pool of blood he left me to clean up on me own that came down from my legs your honor. He killed the one thing that kept me sane, aside from my brother and sister. He killed the little bit of heart I had left. He killed my Nevaeh. From there, I was running away from him. I waited for him to go to work one day and I left. I got my brother and sister from school early that day and left to go to the furthest hotel I could find. That's when I met Mama Gina."
"Who is Mama Gina?", she asked, aiming to dig deeper.
"She's the mother of my lover. The mother of the man who gave me a bigger reason to smile. She's the mother that I never had. She's the woman that gave my siblings and I a place to rest our heads and allowed me to be where I am today. She's the woman that assured me that I would never have to see that devil again.", I said, referring to Troy. "Most importantly, she's the woman who gave birth to the man that God sent to keep me out of harms way."
"Thank you Ms. Harris.", she said, smiling to me as she dabbed her eyes with a tissue.
"We will allow for the jury to deliberate, and court will resume in thirty minutes. I request that Mr. Martin be released from his restraints and allowed time to spend with his family. Please keep him guarded and away from Mr. Gilmore!", she shouted before pounding her gavel for the court break. I fanned my face to try and dry my tears without ruining my make up before rising onto my swollen feet. Today has been a long day and after everything, I'm just praying Dre is able to come home once it's all said and done. I'm in desperate need up a foot rub and some love from my man.
He wasted no time coming to help me down from the stand that I sat at, pulling me into the best embrace he could with my baby bump between us. The minute his lips met mine, I felt as if we were in heaven and nothing around us mattered. I'm in love with him, and I can't ever imaging losing this. After kissing for what seemed like forever, he pulled away and I lowered my head in defeat as I thought about everything I just said on that stand. Half of those things I never told him, but I didn't want him to look at me any different, times are tough when you're out here on your own.
"Look at me.", he demanded, gently lifting my chin with his index finger. The single stray tear trickling down my face let him know that it was serious, this was something that I have yet to overcome, no matter how hard I've tried. "I love you Sincere and I can promise you whatever that nigga did to you in the past, he'll never do it again. I promise you that your past will never stop me from loving you. You make me happy baby and I love everything about you."
His words assured me that everything would be okay, no matter the outcome of this little setback. The love is there, our baby girl is healthy and growing, and our money is flowing smoothly. I just want him to be home so our family can be complete again. I want him to be home so I can be at peace. The constant worrying and the late night nightmares must come to an end.
He wiped the tear from my face with ease before leading me out of the court room, out into the hallway where everyone else was. All the on lookers of the court case clapped for me as I came out of the court room as I just smiled, looking over to Dre as he smiled down onto me. This was the unconditional love that I looked forward to having for the rest of my life. After all of the trials and tribulations, I've been waiting for us to be back in our prime.
"You did amazing.", Adrianne said, nodding her head in approval.
"Sincere, I'm so proud of you.", Juliana co-signed.
"You're such a strong person Sincere. I promise God has a true soldier on his hands.", Breanna said.
"Thank you guys.", I smiled, as Dre clenched his grip on my hand, causing me to look at him. His face tightened as he peered over Troy, who continuously stared at us. If looks could kill, I don't know who would die first.
"Calm down baby.", I stated before lifting his hand to kiss the back of it. The last thing I needed was for him to lose his cool, it would destroy this alternative image that everyone is starting to few him in.
"I'm 'bout to hit Publix real quick. A real nigga 'bout hungry as fuck. Anybody need anything?", Bre asked, breaking the bitter silence that sat between all of us as we all peered over the disgusting look Troy managed to place onto us.
"Nah, I'm good.", Choppy said, looking as if he was mentally destroying this man.
"I want pineapples.", Ju said, smiling.
"Yeah, can you bring me a pineapple and strawberry fruit bowl please?", I asked. She nodded before saying her goodbyes and heading off.
Dre looked over to me with an unreadable look before peering down at my belly, smiling. This little girl was definitely going to give us hell, but hopefully she would be the one to keep him sane. I know he's going to love everything about her and I know he's going to fall in love with her. I plan on giving her the world, but I know he's going to give her the universe.
•§§§•
"Yes baby, right there!", I yelled, pushing his head further into the promised land as he began to complete what he promised.
"Stop running.", he groaned, causing my eyes to roll to the back of my head.
I grabbed the pillow next to me to try and muffle my cries as he has his way with me. After two months of him being away, he's finally home and I'm finally able to release this tension. He toyed with me and like a good girl, I was creaming everywhere, but I was no where near done with him.
"Dre, I need it!", I moaned, referring to his package. He can't keep denying me or I'll lose my damn mind. He inserted his tongue, causing my legs to shake uncontrollably as he has his way with me. It did me some justice, but I needed to feel him and I needed to feel him now.
He wasted no time coming to kiss my lips, which gave me the opportunity to remove him from the Calvin Klein boxers. Solid as a rock, he was ready and I just know he can't deny me.
"Dre, I need it.", I said against his lips.
"I'm not tryna' hurt the baby Sin.", he said, causing me to let out a sigh of disappointment
"You won't, just be careful.", I stated.
"When I'm in that pussy, ain't no being cautious or careful.", he said, giving me a scrunched facial expression.
I allowed another sign to escape as he placed himself back in his boxers, causing me to roll over onto my side from my back. He wrapped his arm around me to cuddle, but I honestly didn't want to be touched. I removed myself and sniffled a little before waddling my fat ass into the bathroom to take a shower.
"I know you're not crying.", Dre said, slightly chuckling as he followed me into the bathroom, wrapping his arms around me.
"Leave me alone.", I pulled away from him, as I wiped a tear falling from my face.
"Stop crying G.", he laughed, before trying to make a serious facial expression. He failed miserably.
"No, because I want some penis.", I cried, as my face began to turn red.
He held his arms out for me as I walked into them in tears. Pregnancy was hard, and I've been waiting like a faithful girlfriend for him to get out of jail so he can beat my walls loose. This is the thanks I get.
"You're such a baby.", he said, holding me as I continued to cry. Eventually, I'll get over it, but for whatever reason, I just can't stop crying.
"Shut up.", I whined, causing him to laugh some more. "Is it because I'm fat?"
"No baby, you're beautiful as hell, even with the baby weight and you know that. I just don't want to put my baby girl in harms way. One more month and you can have as much dick as you want.", he said, kissing my forehead.
"I feel like you don't want to touch me because I look like a fat ass pig. My breasts are getting huge, my face is getting fat, my feet are like ham hocks and my toes look like swollen mini sausages. I just look terrible.", I cried, as my lip quivered out of disappointment.
"You're pregnant Sincere, with my child. No matter how much weight you gain or how unattractive you feel, you'll always be the most beautiful woman to me.", he said, causing me to crack a smile.
"Shut up, I know I'm fine.", I smirked, beginning to strip out of my clothes.
"Bipolar as fuck.", he mumbled. "We need to talk Sin."
"About?", I asked, peering over to him as I slipped out of my bra. It felt good to feel free after a long day of court, but it felt even better to hear the jury say "not guilty".
"You know.", he said, giving me a look that let me know he was being dead serious.
"I mean, I've already told you that my mind is made up. We don't live together Dre, and if you don't want to be around him, you don't have to be. You don't have to do anything for him, but I refuse to sit and watch that child suffer. Whether he's yours or not, no child deserves to suffer.", I said, returning the look he gave me.
"So you wanna' have to deal with that hoe for eighteen years? Eighteen years of her delusional ass?", he asked, getting closer to me.
"She's trying to better herself Dre.", I stated.
"Man fuck that shit, she wasn't trying to better herself when she was doing allat' fuckin' extra!", he yelled, raising his voice.
"You better lower your fucking voice.", I said, sizing him. Kaylani and Jayceon were sleep in their beds, resting up for school in the morning and the last thing I needed him to do was wake them up. They don't even know he's back yet.
"Or what? You not taking care of that kid Sincere. Matter fact, where he at?", he asked.
"Ya' mom's house.", I said, crossing my arms over my chest while shifting all my weight to one side. "Yeah, I bet your ass feel real dumb now. Get the fuck out my way."
"I swear if you wasn't pregnant..", he mumbled, jumping at me as if he were about to hit me.
"You ain't stupid.", I said, rolling my eyes at him.
"Girl fuck you.", he said, waving me off.
"Fuck you too dude.", I stated, shooting a bird his way.
"Get your sticky ass in the shower.", he mumbled, causing me to crack a laugh.
"First of all, eat my ass.", I laughed, causing him to also burst into laughter.
"Nasty as fuck G.", he mushed my head a little before pulling me into an embrace. "I love you."
"I love you too.", I smiled, pecking his lips a couple times. "I know it's going to be hard and I know you don't want anything to do with her, but you and I both know that little boy may just be yours Dre."
"I'm having a DNA test done and I'll make my mind up from there. That's all I can really say. If he's mine, then you know I'll handle my responsibilities, but if he's not, I don't know where to go from there.", he said, licking his lips in thought.
"I have faith that you'll be a great father or fatherly figure to Nahmir. I fell in love with that little boy the minute I laid my eyes on him and so did Mama Gina."
"We'll see how this goes.", he stated. I used my hand to pull guide his chin so he could look me in my eyes.
"We got this alright?", I asked him, smiling as he just smiled back.
"Together.", he said.
"Forever."
•••
It's been a minute, but I know y'all have been waiting for this. I plan on ending this book at chapter 50, but depending on how everything is going, I may start a sequel. I have also began a new book, but I will not be publishing it until this one is complete. Also, I need a new cover photo for this book, so I've decided to make it a competition. The winner will get the OFFICIAL first chapter of the new book, along with a photo of the two main character 😇. You will definitely be acknowledged.
I am also please to announce that I have just recently gotten accepted into Florida International University also, for my followers that are curious about me. At the end of this book, I will give a little information about myself, but for now, we will keep on trucking. Thank you to everyone that vote and read my book! You are highly appreciated. I LOVE LOVE LOVE comments, so I ask that you guys comment whatever is on your minds.
Sincerely , KP 💜🙏🏾