Song of the chapter:
Insecure - Brent Faiyaz
The first was Lee Taeyong.
He was a strikingly handsome young boy with vibrant red hair that accentuated his beautiful brown eyes and flawless porcelain skin. Every feature, from his prominent jaw to the muscles that sculpted his body, exuded strength and allure. He was out of your league, and you knew it.
In high school, you fell head over heels in love with him. What started as a simple crush quickly transformed into a sick obsession. Despite his lack of reciprocation, you were content with being invisible to him. Deep down, you knew it could never work out. He was the heartthrob of the school, while you were just a nobody.
So you watched him from a distance, always close yet never truly near.
Then came Cha Eunwoo.
He was the epitome of a pretty boy, the boy next door. Polite and innocent, at least on the surface. What captivated you the most was his secret life—he targeted the rich, stealing from them and giving to the poor, like a modern-day Robin Hood. It was undeniably attractive, and for the first time, you felt a true investment. However, his endeavours came to an abrupt end. Despite his intelligence, he made a grave mistake and was sentenced to life in prison.
And now there was Jeon Jungkook. The man you were currently consumed by. He was the one you loved with every fibre of your being—the one you hoped would be the last. Whether that meant he would kill you or you would kill him, you didn't care.
Jungkook was different from the rest. Intelligent, manipulative, a cold-blooded killer with a warm heart. It seemed contradictory, impossible even, but he embodied that duality.
He was everything to you—the fire and the sin. Breathing him in felt like burning, but you willingly embraced the self-destructive love. It was a suicide mission for your heart, and you were willing to sell your soul for the intoxicating high it brought.
• • •
A swarm of students flooded out of the grand lecture hall as soon as the clock struck twelve, eager to begin their lunch break. Jungkook packed his things with a distracted frown, unable to shake off the words you had spoken earlier. The unfamiliar feeling that gripped him could only be described as a mix of jealousy and anger—a sensation he despised.
He joined the throng of students making their way through the corridors and into the main courtyard, a gentle breeze tousling his dark chestnut locks. Taehyung struggled to keep up with Jungkook's brisk pace, casting him a curious glance. "Dude, what's with the expression? And why are you in such a hurry?"
"Just keep up," Jungkook retorted, unbothered by Taehyung's observation. "I'm looking for [Y/N]."
"[Y/N]?" Taehyung's voice carried a hint of surprise, though he was well aware of the connection between you and Jungkook. It stung him deeply, and he couldn't help but resent you for it. "Why?"
"It's important."
"That doesn't answer my question," Taehyung pressed, jogging to match Jungkook's long strides. "Is there something going on between you two? You can be honest with me, you know. I'm supposed to be your best friend."
"I..." Jungkook hesitated. Taehyung deserved to know, at least to some extent. But he couldn't divulge all the details of your unofficial relationship. That was a secret, your secret. "Yes, I guess there is."
"I knew it!" Taehyung exclaimed, feigning surprise. "How long has this been going on?"
"I don't know. I don't keep track of those things."
A year and a half.
"What about IU?" Taehyung probed. "Are you che—"
"No," Jungkook interjected, cutting Taehyung off. "I'm not cheating. And technically, I never was. IU and I were never official—I never asked her out. We flirted occasionally, but there were no romantic feelings on my part."
"So you're stringing her along?" Taehyung accused, his tone turning venomous. He didn't care about IU, but he despised how you had changed his best friend. "What's wrong with you?"
"There's nothing wrong with me," Jungkook retorted, his eyebrows furrowing. "What's your problem? You've never said anything like this before. Shouldn't you be happy that I actually like someone?"
"Someone like [Y/N]?" Taehyung scoffed bitterly, shaking his head in disbelief. "Are you kidding me?"
"Excuse me?" Jungkook's anger flared. Taehyung had struck a nerve. "What are you implying?"
"I just don't think she's right for you," Taehyung sighed, his voice softening. He hadn't intended to argue with his best friend. "You deserve someone better."
"Like who?" Jungkook challenged, raising an eyebrow expectantly.
"I...I don't know," Taehyung hesitated, fighting the urge to say me. "Just someone better."
"Bullshit," Jungkook laughed bitterly, shaking his head in disbelief. "You're just jealous."
"Jealous?" Taehyung's eyes widened, caught off guard. Did Jungkook know? "What are you talking about?"
"I saw you dancing with her at Yoongi's masquerade party," Jungkook replied, his tone laced with danger. "I know you like her."
Relief washed over Taehyung. Phew.
Wait...
What?
"That's not true," Taehyung replied, his lips pursed tightly.
"Then what is it?" Jungkook pressed, waiting for an explanation.
"I..." I love you. "I don't know."
"Whatever," Jungkook dismissed, rolling his eyes. "Believe what you want. I don't care about your opinion."
Jungkook's venomous words wounded Taehyung more than he let on.
"Fuck you."
Those were the last words Taehyung spat before storming off, consumed by a toxic rage that filled his entire being.
• • •
Taehyung seethed with anger.
His knuckles turned white as he clenched his fists, exerting great effort to keep silent and avoid shattering into a million pieces. His teeth ground together, suppressing the explosive energy bubbling within him. His hunched posture radiated an acidic animosity, burning, slicing, and potent. His face flushed tomato red from the surge of suppressed rage, his mind clouded and turbulent.
Lost in his own perilous thoughts, Taehyung nearly tripped over someone crouched on the floor. At the last moment, he veered to the left, stumbling into a nearby wall. Quickly regaining his balance, he dusted off his shirt and turned to see a strikingly handsome man glaring back at him, irritation marking his temple.
The man possessed tousled, dark brown hair, thick and lustrous. His mesmerising eyes were a rich chocolate, with captivating flecks of a lighter brown dancing within. His face exuded strength and definition, chiselled from pure granite. His dark eyebrows formed a serious expression, contrasting with his typically playful smile, which now hardened into a stern line. His perfect lips beckoned for a kiss.
Taehyung found himself ensnared in an unbreakable daze, his gaze fixated on the man's captivating eyes. He gulped, his cheeks turning a deep shade of red. A sugary smile gradually spread across the man's face.
"I should say watch where you're going," the man spoke up, his tone playfully flirtatious, a spark of allure igniting in his eyes. "But now that I've seen you, I don't mind at all."
Taehyung was utterly at a loss for words. He continued to watch as the man rose to his feet, effortlessly smoothing down his hair. "I-I..."
"I'm Park Hyungsik," the man introduced himself, his smile softening, as he extended his hand for Taehyung to shake. "And you are?"
Taehyung glanced at the offered hand, noting its smoothness and delicacy. He gulped again, but decided to shake hands nonetheless. Hyungsik's smile was angelic, almost intoxicating, making it difficult to look away. Taehyung mustered a sheepish smile, desperately trying to appear composed.
"I'm Kim Taehyung," he replied with a touch of confidence, clearing his throat. "I apologise for bumping into you. I should have been more attentive."
"It's fine," Hyungsik laughed, his laughter infectious. His voice was smooth and deep. "You seem to be in a rush. Are you okay?"
Was he?
"Yeah, I'm fine," Taehyung smiled back, his cheeks slightly puffed. Hyungsik found it to be the cutest thing in the world but decided not to mention it to avoid any potential awkwardness. "Well, at least I am now."
• • •
As you strolled down the long hallway, softly humming to yourself with headphones in your ears, you found solace in the rhythmic beat of the music. It filled you with a comforting warmth, coursing through your veins and momentarily drowning out the chaos of the world around you. You and the music were in perfect harmony, a language spoken without words. The headphones created a bubble that separated you from the outside world.
However, your peaceful reverie was abruptly shattered as Jungkook swiftly reached out and grabbed your wrist, pulling you away from the crowd of students surrounding you. Struggling to break free from his firm grip, your breath quickened as he led you into a nearby storage closet. A sharp click resonated through the room as the door closed, enveloping you both in a thick, suffocating darkness. Jungkook fumbled around, eventually managing to flick on a yellow light, casting a harsh illumination across the small space.
"What the h—"
Before you could finish your sentence, Jungkook's lips forcefully crashed against yours, leaving you breathless and disoriented. The unexpectedness of the kiss caught you off guard, its intensity both sloppy and passionate. Reflexively, your arms wrapped around his strong neck, succumbing to the sensation of his body heat mingling with yours. For a fleeting moment, you gave in, arching into his embrace and emitting a soft moan.
But then, reality hit you like a tidal wave.
No.
Temptation was the work of the devil.
With your hands pressed against his broad chest, you pushed him away, gasping for air. Heavy breaths filled the small space as Jungkook stared down at you with a wicked expression, his eyes darkening.
"Y-You're—" you managed to utter, lost for words. "I-I should slap you for that!"
"That's your punishment," he taunted, a wicked grin spreading across his face. "Consider yourself lucky I didn't do more. I still have some respect for you. If it were anyone else—"
"Punishment?" You exclaimed, your teeth gritting with annoyance. The audacity of this man. "Punishment for what, exactly?"
"There were others before me," Jungkook hissed, jealousy flashing in his eyes. He scuffed his heel against the closet wall, the sound echoing in the confined space. You exhaled, attempting to calm your racing heart. "And suddenly, I don't feel so special anymore. Were they better than me?"
"Special?" You repeated incredulously. "You're the most special one of them all, Jeon Jungkook. And no, they weren't. Are you jealous?"
"Yes," Jungkook admitted, causing your eyes to widen. You had been teasing him, not expecting such a sincere and serious response. "I like you."
Stuttering, you struggled to comprehend his words. "What?"
Jungkook paused, as if trying to gather his thoughts and feelings. "I. Like. You," he repeated slowly, his gaze intense.
You scoffed, raising your hands in disbelief. "Yeah, right. You're only saying that because you want to kill me. And that's fine. I understand. It's the nature of our relationship," you said, barking out a short, humourless laugh, attempting to hide your growing confusion.
Unamused, Jungkook pinched the bridge of his nose. "Why do you always make this so damn difficult?" He sighed, raising a finger to halt any further interruptions, knowing you were itching to interject. "Our relationship is more than just wanting to kill each other. You know that."
Silence settled between you, broken only by your laboured breathing.
"Okay," you murmured, shoulders lifting in a nonchalant shrug. "So you finally admit that you like me. Then what? Is that it?"
Rolling his eyes, Jungkook swiftly grabbed your hand, preventing you from leaving the room. The contact sent a flush of warmth to your cheeks, amplified by the close proximity in the cramped space. Biting your lip, you grimaced at your own words.
Jungkook took a step closer, his cologne enveloping you, intensifying your blush. "[Y/N]," he breathed, his voice soft. "Will you be my girlfriend?"