"Release him, Phun Phumiphat, and i will let you go unharm!"
Gregory shout at the man who was holding my hands. He was shielding me behind his broad shoulders.
"Over my dead body! You took him from me and i'll take him back you mother fucker!" Phun shout back at him.
"Shoot them!!"
And the sound of open fire was heard from every direction and i was dragged to everywhere.
It happened so fast i couldn't recall what's happening. "Noh, don't be scared, i'll get you out of here. Don't worry bae." Phun said between the gunfire.
"He's hit! He's hit!" After what it feels like eternity, suddenly someone shouted. Then everything went silent. I couldn't prevent myself from getting out of my hiding place, and saw that it was Gregory who was laying in the snow, a blood splattered around him like a scarlet ribbon in the snow.
The gun fire was stopped when he ordered his man to stop. Then he whispers to someone from his troop.
"Mr. Gregory wants to say something to his wife. Please come forward, we will not harm you."
Is that me? Was it suppose to be me? I resented it when he calls me his wife. And now he calls me infront of everyone here. But he's dying and i would feel guilty if i don't answer his call. Don't ask me how i feel that moment. I was barely able to walk in the snow yet i have to come forward. Phun, being considerate, lets go of my hand and wait where he stands.
Gregory was smiled at me when i put his head on my lap. His breath was labored and shallow, and his body was trembling in my touch. Yet he managed to smile at me warmly.
"Noon..i'm sorry for what i've done..I love you too much..Thank..you.." He's mumbling something incoherent before fading away right before my eyes.
The man who was holding me in custody for maybe more than a year, the man who was being so protective towards me and guarding me all the time, the man whose love was unrequited.
I should've hate him, i know. But he's gone now, for a reason unknown to me. I pity for a soul that could've been saved if not for that stupid reason. He was still in his prime age, he could've had his own family and be happy with them. And for that, i cried for him. I cried for his loss.
"Stupid, stupid man... what's this are for? You guys are fighting, for what!? Is it enough? are you satisfied killing another human?" I shouted. I don't love Gregory and i never will. But no man should ever kill another for any reason.
"Dumbass! He shot your brains out over a year ago and you cry for him now? Don't you cry for yourself that he imprisoned you all this time? making you wear that stupid woman's clothing? and making your true husband suffering for his loss? making your children into an orphan without their mother? He was a leader of the worlds leading drug dealer, jerkhead! We had been battling with him for eternity trying to get him away from our country, and you feel sorry for him? ha? Don't be so naive, Noh!" Earn yelled at me while walking closer to me, drag Phun along with him.
"Phun, get your stupid naive wife back for God's sake!" He said. Phun pulls me up and we left Gregory's body in the care of his men.
Don't ask me how confuse i am this time. I don't even know who i was yet i have to experience all this commotion. Phun, Earn, and his companions are taking me to some abandoned warehouse, while the rest of their crews disarmed Gregory's man from their weapons.
The night was turning into dawn, and i still sat in the corner and doing completely nothing. I don't care what they're doing or saying, i wanted to get away from everything.
That guy Phun was always coming to me and asked me how am i doing or just sat by my side, but he's been busy with something so he can't always stay with me. Which is great, so i can contemplate with my life.
"Noh, we'll be leaving in five minutes, are you ready?" Phun said. He reaches his hands to me, and i'm gladly reach for him. I'm so drained. I really want to go home, if i ever have one.
This beautiful man, is he really that boy in my dreams? Is what Earn told me was right that Gregory shot me and took me away from them?
Phun Phumiphat was a drop dead gorgeous man. There's no way he would want me to be his lover. I would be so lucky to have find a man like him.
.
.
It was a long flight with a plane, and Phun was sitting next to me during the flight. I have already change my clothes since the previous set was soaked in Gregory's blood. The man sitting next to me was holding my hand so tight and looking at me dreamily. He said nothing, just staring at me with that eagle eyes of him.
"Why are you looking at me? want me to kick your ass ha?" I said, making him laugh so hard.
"Yes, you are my Noh. No body could ever make me laugh like this but my Noh."
"Phun Phumiphat, who are you to me?" I asked him. He brings my hand to his chest, and smile.
"I asked the same question to myself years ago when i first met you in the kindergarten. Do you mind if i tell you a story?"
I shake my head. It would be a very long flight so i don't mind even if he tells me everything about microbes.
"Years ago there was this boy who's in his first day of kindergarten. He was so scared that he doesn't want to let go of his caretaker. Then he saw this other boy, with light brown hair, light skin, big hazel eyes who is jumping up and down so cheerfully as if nothing in this world can stop him from being happy. From that moment on, he promised to himself that no matter what happens he will make sure that the boy be happy all the time even if the boy doesn't realize that. From time to time he didn't have the courage to talk to the boy until one day that boy of his dream come to his room in the school, that's when he finds his courage. He asked the boy to be his boyfriend, which the boy refused flatly in a very cute way. But nevertheless he still determined to get the boy's heart, he never stop loving the boy for any reason, just as the boy loves him unconditionally in the end."
Phun told me everything about his love story, about the love that he has with the boy. And every time he tells me his story, flashes of memories comes back to me, creating a dull pain in my heart that won't let go.
"Hey Noh, what if i take you to my high school? the place where it all begins?"
That big black orbs of him pulls me in and i can't come out again. I surrendered to the light that dances in his eyes and reflecting my shadow, as if there's only me in his eyes. That black pool which speak of calmness and serenity, endless passion and in the same time, patience and endurance.
I was attracted by those twinkle stars which shines brightly in those depth, pulls me in like a giant magnet into it's core. And the next thing i know, by the Gods, was my lips on his, barely touched, just a light brush on his moisted orange tinted lips. His feels like an ember, hot breath against hot breath. Our nose touched, lightly, nudging softly to each other, while our eyes was still locked to each other and don't want to let go.
It's not enough, i want more, more of him. Right there i know, that even my heart knows without my knowledge, he is the boy in my dream. I may not remember him, i have forget about my past, but i remember his touch, i know his heart.
But i was too shy to admit it. I was never the one initiated the move and i don't know what to do. I feel my cheeks burning when i look at him so i look everywhere but him.
"Noh? Is it a yes? yes or no? please tell me.." he asked me once again.
"Why are you so noisy?"
"Come on, come with me to Friday, please? na?na?" He shakes my shoulder.
"Ok. I'll give you a chance."
He smile so wide i can see his molars.
.
.
.
Phun took me to an apartment that i presumed was in downtown Bangkok, a drastic climate change makes me grumpy all the time. Especially when you have no one you can remember.
When we were arrived we were actually greeted by a number of people. There were a middle aged women who claimed to be my Ma and Phun's Ma, middle aged men who claimed to be our Pa, two dazzling twins who called me Mommy (hell? i'm a man, brat. You can see for yourself), and an adorable twin toddler, that the first twin claimed to be their brothers.
Since they know that i lost my memories, they agree to let Phun get some therapy for me. Really. Do i need one?
So here i am, in this apartment, with that sizzling hot guy, alone. Hey get your mind out of the gutter, i'm not doing anything to get him. Not in a million way, before i get my memories back.
That night i slept like a baby after we had a casual dinner in some food stall below our apartment with our neighbour, Naek. Well he's fine but not as fine as Phun, heehee. I kinda like that Phun boy, but i won't tell him.
I dreamt a very nice dream that night, i dreamt that Phun brings me flower bouqette and kneels before me, asking me to be his boyfriend. Are you crazy?
-----------------------------------------------------------
Phun's POV
My Noh have come back to me. My long lost love, Noh Naphat. Do you know Noh, you bring back my sanity. You're the one person who can attach me to the world and luckily we can bring you back here.
There's no words can describe how i feels right now. Sitting next to him during the flight have made me feel nervous but anxious in the same time. I know what i have to face, Earn have told me about his memory loss, but i didn't think it would be this difficult to restrain myself.
As soon as i met him i wanted to do everything that we used to do, but his eyes was void of emotion, he's losing all his memories about us, about me. There's nothing hurt me more than that, that his love for me fades in front of my eyes.
I deserve this after all i've made him through. He's been suffering because of me. He had given up all his life for me. He gave me beautiful and perfect offspring, and yet i had to let him suffered to no end.
I wasn't there when he had to struggle with the boys, when he carried our babies. I wasn't there when he had to face my beastly companions, instead i let them do whatever they want with him despite my knowledge about how they felt for him. I manipulate him to the point of no turning back, how can i even call the things that i did as love?
Maybe it's better for him to lose his memory, so we can start all over again with a new start. Our enemy has gone, he's save, we are save. I'll touch him slowly, i'll love him slowly, just like the way i did before. Noh, i'm sorry. Let me love you more this time, my life, my heart...