Chapter Six
Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.
What is happening? All these questions are running around my head.
There's a knock at the office door. Katherine peeks her head in.
"Are you okay, Michael?" She asks. Walking over to me.
"Yeah, I'm fine, why wouldn't I be?" I snap back, throwing the letter on the table. She bends down in front of me and puts her hand on my lap.
"Would you like to discuss the letter now, or later?" She looks into my eyes with sympathy. Why do people constantly treat me like a child. I'm fifteen for fuck sake.
"What's there to discuss?" I ask. Trying to show now emotion.
"Well, would you like to build a relationship with your father?"
"I don't know." I say, bluntly.
Would you like some time to think it over?" She says, standing back up and pulling a chair over to beside me. She takes a seat and looks at me.
"I don't know, I mean... No. I don't. I want to see him." I admit. I get kicked out of here soon. I'll need a home.
"Okay, Michael. I can arrange contact, if that's what you want. Do you have any questions?"
"Yeah, I do. If I keep in touch with him. Will he find out everything about me?"
"Yes. We will have to show him your file." Katherine explains. I don't like this. I don't want him finding everything out.
" I don't want him knowing everything. I don't want him knowing about John."
"Michael, what happened with John is nothing to be ashamed or embarrassed about." She gives me a sad look. "John is in prison, he's not getting out anytime soon." She finishes speaking and changes leg position.
"I don't care, I don't want him knowing." I say, beginning to raise my voice. I'm getting angry now. " I don't want to see him if you're going to tell him." I'm shouting now. Those six months of anger management didn't do me any good.
"What if we tell him, but we won't until you're ready to let him know?" She's always been good at compromising.
"Fine." I walk out and walk towards Lauren, who is reading to a smaller child.
"Lauren, I need to go out and get some air, clear my head." I say, hoping she agrees.
"Okay, Buddy. Do me a favour, try and be home before eight, okay?" She says nicely. I nod and head out.
I run. I run as fast as I can, for as long as I can. I stop, and try to decide where I'm going. I'm going to Jacobs, I know exactly what I need.