Dear Jason,
I’m sorry, but this was the only way to tell you what I want to. This might seem stupid, sudden and clingy, but I just have to tell you. I know we did not get along very well at the beginning, and we are friends now. In no way do I want to ruin our friendship. I really like you Jason. Like that. And I think there’s a possibility that I’m in love with you as well! Please don’t take this in the wrong way. I have never felt this way before about anybody. Even if you don’t feel the same way about me, its okay, and if that is the case, please don’t freak out. We will still be friends. I love you…
Claire
I put aside my pen and reread the letter to myself some eleven times before finally deciding to give it to him. I did not want to involve Brad this time. I wanted to do it myself.
I walked down the stairs, looking at the letter in my hands nervously. Mom and dad were going out and I could hear them asking Jason to take good care of me. Okay, so once again it was just Jason and me. I became nervous again. I had second thoughts on the letter. What if he reciprocated my feelings and kissed me suddenly? Oh dear! Not like it would really happen, but if it did, I would pass out for sure.
Brad went out soon, and we had the whole house to ourselves again.
“Oh my God!” I whispered to myself. “What am I gonna do now?”
Then suddenly some form of supernatural power took over me.
“Oh fuck it. I’m going to do this.”
“Claire! Claire open the door!”
I woke up and realized I had fallen asleep on my desk. Thank God, it was a dream. The letter was a bit crushed under my face. Jason was knocking on the door. I went and opened it and asked him to come in. And then it dawned upon my brilliant brain that the letter was out in the open. There could not have been a bigger idiot than me, trust me. I did not want him to see it at that time. No way!
I abruptly sat on my desk. ON MY DESK! Over the letter.
“What the…” he said.
“Hey, it’s my favorite place to sit. You got a problem?”
“Uh… no! I just wanted to apologize. I’m sorry!”
“Forgiven! Now bye!” Saying this I came down and pushed him out of the door.
“Hey, wait.”
He made his way in. He stood in front of me, his back facing the desk. As far as I knew him, if he saw the letter, he would leave no stone unturned to read it. Stupid stubborn bodyguard.
“To be honest, I don’t really know why you’re angry. So, if you could explain?”
It’s really irritating how clueless boys can be at times. I mean, where were boys when God was distributing brains?
“I’m not angry, I don’t know what happened. I’m really weird you know.”
“Yeah. I know.” He chuckled.
“Okay bye!” I tried pushing him out of the room again. But in vain.
“What’s gotten into you? Why are you being so pushy? Pun intended!”
“I got that one, you’re so funny Jason! Okay bye.”
But he just came back inside and flopped onto my bed. He made himself comfortable, and lay down shortly afterwards. “You have a nice room.”
“Thanks!” I omitted the ‘okay bye’ because it was impossible to get him out now. I slowly moved towards the desk while he looked at the ceiling. I almost reached it. Yes!
“Hey, why do you have a green desk?” He laughed.
Holy crap. I withdrew my hand. “It goes with my room, moron.”
“No, it doesn’t.”
“Yes it does.” I had an idea. “Ugh! Oh my God!”
“What?”
“Jason my head. It’s gonna explode. Please get me a tablet, now…please!”
“Okay, wait!” He rushed out of the room.
I was so happy! I turned around and my happiness vanished! The letter was gone! I looked around, panicked. The winds were strong, and I followed their direction. I went out and saw the letter lying on the staircase. As I bent down to pick it up, he was back.
“What’s that?”
“Uh. That is my…uh…you know, homework? Yeah.”
“Alright. I got your medicine. Here.”
“But I’m okay now. Bye!” Saying this I shut the door. My heart was beating so loudly that he could probably hear it from outside the door! That was so close! I carefully hid the letter in my journal and kept it safely. “I’m going to give it to him tomorrow. Yes!”
“That was awkward.” I heard a voice from outside. I opened the door and dragged him inside.
“Oh, Jason I’m sorry! You know how weird I am!”
“I better go, I’m really scared. I think you are actually an alien. What if you abduct me?” He laughed.
I rolled my eyes.
“You roll your eyes a lot!”
“You observe a lot!”
“But you have beautiful eyes!” He was chuckling, but his eyes showed seriousness.
I blushed and looked down at my feet. “Thanks…”
“Okay, see you at dinner, Clairey! And seriously, please redo that desk of yours! It’s ugly!”
“Aye aye captain!” I laughed.
He went to his room and I closed the door. Oh my god, did he just say that? He thought my eyes were beautiful? I looked at myself in the mirror. I fluttered my eyes, and immediately realized it was stupid. So I just simply looked at them and thought about him. All my homework was done. I sat down with my laptop on my poof and opened YouTube. I searched for some makeup techniques to enhance the eyes. Okay, it was getting really weird, but I just had the sudden urge to look pretty. For him…
I finally settled on a video after viewing many. I tried it on and boy, did my eyes look pretty. I looked like someone straight out of a fashion magazine! Wow! I was doing it tomorrow for college, positively!
The alarm went off. I sat up. It was a little earlier than I usually woke up, but I needed some time for my makeup, right?!
When I was ready, I looked at myself for the hundredth time, and hoped he would like it. I felt a bit nervous. I went down. I sat at the table and waited for him. He was finally there. He wished everyone good morning. Then he looked at me.
“Good…” he stopped for a while, “morning, Claire!” he smiled.
I returned his greeting, and smiled back. I noticed him look at me several times during breakfast. I had so many butterflies in my tummy!
In the car, Jason finally spoke.
“Claire, what did you do to your eyes? They look… amazing. I mean they looked amazing before, but they look even better now!”
“Thanks, just something I looked up on YouTube!” I blushed.
“Because I said your eyes were beautiful?”
Oh no. Oh no. I went blank and just managed a laugh and “No it’s not like that…just…”
“Just?”
“Drive, Jason!”
He chuckled. Shit. When I wanted him to know he would not understand by any means. When I wanted to hide something, he got it straightaway.
We reached college around an hour earlier, I don’t know how. So we decided to stroll down the streets a bit. It was 11 am. The sun was scorching and it hurt my eyes. I snatched his sunglasses and put them on.
“Hey?”
“What? The sun hurts my eyes!”
“No, I mean, I can’t see your beautiful eyes.”
Oh boy, what was happening? What had gotten into Jason?
“Wh... what?” I took them off.
“Thanks!” he snatched them back, “Mine hurt too! You should get yourself a pair.”
Ugh. It was a trick. I should have known.
“I’m hungry. Get me something to eat, Jason. Or else I might as well gobble you up in one go.” I said, showing my anger.
He came back with a small hamburger and three extra large chicken sandwiches. Of course, they were all for him except the tiny burger. I wondered how he could eat that much. And he definitely had a thing for chicken sandwich. He would either be watching TV, being bossy or eating one. That was him. Pretty much. But I didn’t mind.
After we were done, we were just chilling by our car, when somebody showed up. Cathy Parker. The most irritating, haughty, bitchy girl in the entire college. I don’t know why she always behaved like she was the queen of the world. She was pretty alright, but that didn’t give her the license to be an asshole, right? She was tall, neither too thin nor fat, just perfect. Her long blonde hair flowed down to her waist. Her face was always covered with a thick layer of makeup. I was never jealous of her, though. Until now.
She was making her way towards us, flashing a flirty smile towards Jason. He immediately noticed and turned to me.
“Who’s the sexy lady?” He grinned happily.
I glared at him, but softened my look soon.
“Cathy Bitch Parker.”
“Whoa! Somebody’s jealous!”
“I… I’m not jealous. It’s just that I don’t like her. Look at all that makeup. You can tell how fake she is.”
Jason looked at me, and his smile suddenly changed into a serious expression.
“What?” I said nervously.
“Hmm. Girls like you, so simple… yet so beautiful.”
This was it. I was asking him right now.
“You really think I’m beautiful? Or is it just another flirty move of yours?”
Before he could answer, Cathy barged in. Trust me, I wanted to punch her in the face. She destroyed my moment!
“Hey, Jason. I’m Cathy. You…umm… you want to hang out sometime?”
He was grinning to the fullest. He looked at me and when he saw my cold face, his happiness vanished. I could tell he was obliged to obey what my face said.
“I…yeah, sure. Let’s be friends?” He said.
“Or more?”
“I…uh… actually have a girlfriend.”
Cathy was shocked. So was I.
“She?” she pointed to me in disbelief, with an expression of disgust.
“What do you mean she?” Jason was angry, “I really did not like that tone of yours.”
“What?” She retorted.
“Do you think she is any less than you? At least her face is not covered beneath a layer of makeup. Don’t talk like that about my best friend. Bitch!”
Okay. I did not see that coming. He was getting sweeter and sweeter and I kept on wanting him more and more. I just had to ask him.
Cathy was shocked and walked away with a look of disgust on her face.
“Best friends?” I chuckled.
“Yeah. You’re the best friend I have ever had. And I mean it. There’s nobody like you, Claire!” Jason smiled. Oh my gosh. I wanted to kiss his lips and never let go.
“Okay, bestie. Let’s go!”
He pulled me into a tight hug, and I could see Cathy looking at us from a distance, mad! Really mad. It made me so happy!
The whole day, we had people stare at us. Clearly, Cathy had spread the word that me and Jason were best friends. Jason was cool with it. Of course, with those looks, he must have been used to being stared at! Girls were suddenly being extra nice to me, and then they got to the point. Jason. Ugh, selfish world. At one point, it was really getting on my nerves. Jason was even flirting with them. I really had to give him a piece of my mind. But before that he had to give me the right to do so. Before that, I had to confess my love. And it wouldn’t be easy.
After college was over, Jason came back to meet me. He was literally surrounded by girls the entire day. I was really mad at him. When Ash and Jess were gone, I wore my frosty glare again.
“What happened?”
“You’re an idiot. Don’t you understand anything at all?” I burst out. It was getting too much to handle.
“Wh… what? What are you talking about?”
I was quiet.
“Oh… being my bestie, I should have spent time with you, right? Come here, Clairey!”
He gave me a tight hug. What the hell kind of an idiot was he?
I did not change my expression. He was uber confused by now.
“We’d better sort this out at home, alright?”
“Just. Drive.” I was angry beyond limits.
At home, I headed for my room straightaway, but he blocked my way. I somehow managed to get inside and shut the door. After I freshened up, I opened my drawer and took out my journal. I looked at the letter one last time and folded it up. I put it in an envelope and wrote Jason on it.
After dinner, Jason headed to his room before I had even finished eating. I waited until everybody was in their room. I opened the door, sneaked out of my room and went straight to his door. Before I could knock, I heard him talking on the phone. So I decided to sit down by the door and wait until he was done.
But my plan never got executed. I overheard something which totally ruined what I had in mind. My already narrow chances of being with him now dropped to zero.
“Yeah, see you tomorrow, sweetheart! I loved how you looked with that dress you had on today!”
JASON HAD A DATE! Oh no, why? Who was he talking to? Why was he talking to her? All my hopes came shattering down. I turned to leave, when he opened the door. I froze. What was I going to say? That I was eavesdropping his conversation with his girlfriend because I’m a total creep?
“Claire, glad you’re here! Have to tell you something!”
I sighed in relief, “Yeah, what?” I said, a fake smile plastered across my face.
“I have a date, though it’s not surprising that I have a date.” He emphasized on ‘I’ and pointed to himself. Talk about self-obsession.
“Who is the lucky girl?” I smiled, but my throat ached.
“Samantha Tyndall, the girl from England. You know her right?”
Of course I knew her. Samantha had moved to New York just last year, and she spoke with a heavy British accent. She was hugely popular at college, you know, a little bitchy, but okay overall. She was Cathy’s best friend, so that pretty much made sense. And yes, she was super pretty. I was nothing in front of her. What was I thinking?!
Jason went on and on about how much he liked her, and it killed me inside, but I kept on listening. He hugged me happily and wished me good night, and I went back to my bedroom. I crushed the letter I had written and put it at the back of my drawer. Needless to say, I didn’t get any sleep that night.