- cute vmin moment
- listen to the song while reading
- a little bit of angst and self-hatred
- mentions of international playboy
- poems written here are mine
•••
how jungkook looks like in this one shot
how taehyung looks like in this one shot
〞part 2〟
your intentions are so unclear,
i've become someone i have always feared.
my head gets so confused when i am thinking about you,
these thoughts are coming out of blue.
i am confused, i am so lost,
but my mind seems to crave you at all cost.
and in these dark and empty evening,
somehow it is hard for me to keep on breathing.
"ugh!" yoongi groaned as he ripped off another piece of paper from his notebook, frustration filling him
it has been three days since yoongi wrote that first, stupid poem about park jimin
what frustrates yoongi so much is that he doesn't know the reason why
why is park jimin on his mind?
yoongi has never spoken to him, so why is the short guy everything he thinks about?
"aish!" yoongi shouted loudly as he ripped the paper in half and dropped it on the floor, putting his head on the table
"what do you want from me park jimin?" yoongi whispered, he wanted to laugh at his own irony
"what do you want from a disgrace like me?" yoongi whispered to himself, hoping for someone to come up and hug him
---
your eyes are all that i think of,
you're looking at me from above.
even though you're so short,
it seems like you're my only support.
i get so lost, confused, puzzled,
my thoughts become so jumbled.
but i reach towards your warm embrace,
i want to hold you once and always.
yoongi was cringing, he was cringing so bad. he was holding his notebook in his hands and literally shaking as he wrote, once again, another poem about jimin
"for fuck's sake" yoongi said a little loudly and few students looked at him, including jimin, who was sitting with tae not too far away from yoongi's table
"earth to jimin!" taehyung snapped his fingers in front of jimin's face and proceeded in catching older boy's attention
"ah? oh sorry tae" jimin smiled apologetically and taehyung laughed
suddenly jimin saw that taehyung looked at someone and blushed madly for some reason
"yah! what was that just now?" jimin asked teasingly, glancing into the direction to where taehyung was looking
"e-eh? it's nothing?" taehyung brushed jimin away but stuttering did not go unnoticed by shorter male
jimin looked into the direction of the table again and caught a face of a bunny-teethed fella
the boy looked quiet attractive, with tattoos and piercings in his lips, his image literally screamed "playboy"
jimin wanted to cringe so bad but when bunny-teethed boy laughed it did not sound as bad. it actually sounded pretty nice
wheels went off in jimin's head and a lighter lighted up "aha!" jimin whisper-shouted and taehyung looked at him in terror
"little taehyung has a crush on a playboy?" jimin teased, sad at the same time because the guy tae liked was international playboy
"s-shut up hyung!" taehyung said and hid his face in his sweater paws. aw, how cute!
"he will never like me anyway..." taehyung whispered sadly and jimin started laughing loudly while smacking the table
"what are you laughing at?" taehyung asked surprised and jimin started to hit his shoulders softly
"have you seen a mirror, princess?" taehyung scrunched his nose up at that
"you're beautiful tae. mr. bunny playboy should be lucky that he caught your attention" jimin smiled fondly at his best friend
jimin leaned over and hugged taehyung to his chest, stroking his hair and shoulders
he felt unbelievable urge to protect his buddy at all cost
"uhm j-jimin?" taehyung asked, mumbled, from where he was crushed against jimin's chest
"i won't let anyone hurt you, taehyungie" jimin whispered protectively and started stroking taehyung's hair
they gained attention from almost everyone who was sitting in the cafeteria. taehyung felt a little embarrassed but jimin laughed slightly and offered younger boy a smile
what jimin did not notice was fuming yoongi and somehow challenged look on jungkook's face
---
you hugged the other person today,
they received your warmth and i'm afraid.
it pissed me off, with no explanation,
i feel like this will be my last station.
weird words play on my tongue, begging for release,
but i can't let them go, oh no, not with such an ease.
my thoughts fight with my heart and tongue,
and i feel like i am so young.
the weird words, they stay inside, they don't see the light of sky,
and i feel like, no i'm sure, that i'm definitely high.
yoongi banged his head on the table, surely to leave some swell on it later
"fuck you park jimin!" yoongi shouted to his empty room, banging his fists against the wall
"fuck you and your orange hair" yoongi continued to shout, not giving a fuck
"fuck your fucking smile and your fucking eyes" yoongi screamed, frustrated and confused
"fuck you for making me feel like this" yoongi kind of cried out as he slid down the wall, clutching his legs and burying his head in between them
yoongi did not notice as he slowly, slowly, started to fall asleep
"come down you, piece of shit" little yoongi heard his dad call out and he quickly dashed downstairs
"hey d-" yoongi was cut short as a large palm connected with his cheek and he fell to the floor, tears welling up in his eyes
"fucking disgrace" his drunk dad spit on him as he kicked small yoongi in the ribs and went to the living room
"owie" yoongi mumbled under his breath, bitting his lip and trying not to cry as pain started to subside
"where is the beer you piece of shit?" his dad shouted from the kitchen and yoongi whimpered before replying
"i-in the cupboards" yoongi heard shuffling and then the cap unscrewing. this was yoongi's everyday life and he hated it with passion
his dad made himself comfortable on the sofa as he watched some television. yoongi limped to his bedroom and closed the door behind him
yoongi laid down on his bed, slowly running his fingers over his bruised ribs and smiling at the ceiling
"i promise you, my future children, i will be a better dad" little yoongi said and started crying bitterly, clutching his stuffed mochi in his palm and smiling
he had only two actually. one was soft pink, with a cheery on the side of it and other one was purple-ish with a strawberry under his mouth
yoongi smiled at his small rice cakes and started to play with them. their black eyes seemed so cute and innocent
"hey, you, faggot, where the fuck are you?" yoongi heard his dad scream and heard footsteps coming closer to his bedroom door
i can do this... have patience yoongi... you can do this
and then the door flew open...
"fuck!" yoongi shouted as his eyes flew open, beads of sweat forming on his forehead, yoongi's breath was rushed and not steady
yoongi grabbed whatever was close to him, which turned out to be a glass of water, and threw it against the door in fear
the glass shattered loudly, broken pieces falling to the ground and yoongi's breath dropped with them, some tears welling up in his eyes
god, why is my life such a mess? why am i such a screw-up?
---
don't worry my babies, this is not the end. i'm kinda sorry for the little bit of angst but i hope i did not trigger anyone
if i did...