Alice Harper
he didn't need to know. so why tell him?
•••
we weren't dating.
I don't know what we are.
why can't it just be a solid thing?
I don't get the point of this whole, let's act like we're dating, but that's it, thing.
"you ready to go?" he asks.
"where is it that we're going exactly?"
"sister's birthday dinner."
"why am I going to this?" I ask him, "wait, do I need to dress up?"
"no, it's at her house, wear whatever."
"but, why?"
"because I want you to come, anymore questions?"
"no." I say quietly and continue to do my makeup.
I went to a doctor a week after it happened to make sure there was t anything wrong with me, I didn't tell anyone or even report it. I didn't see the point in doing so when I knew absolutely nothing.
it was useless.
I was useless.
a few weeks later, all that remains is the memory.
but I can't live in it, I can't put my life on hold.
"you look great."
he puts his arms around me.
but I pull away.
he acts as if nothing just happened.
"ready to go?" he eventually asks.
•••
"why'd it take you this long to get a car?" I ask, hoping I wasn't invading his privacy with that.
"didn't want one for awhile. you've been awfully curious tonight." he says, placing a hand on my lower thigh.
"is that a bad thing?" I ask.
"not necessarily."
"just annoying?" I question.
"you could say that..." he pauses for a minute, "I'm kidding."
"mhm okay."
"i'm I the only one who actually likes driving at night?" he asks.
"I did as a teen, thought it gave me freedom." I say.
"valid point."
"they're nice, your family I mean."
"they're nosey."
"I think that fits into the description of family."
"more or less." he says.
"it was fun though."
"I guess."
"didn't you have fun?"
"more or less."
"stop saying that, it doesn't make sense." I say to him.
"more or less."
"can you not?"
I get a laugh in response this time.