Josh: HELP CALL 911 CALL THE PO PO TYLER HAS GONE FULL YANDERE
Ryan: what the f**k is a yandere? I don't speak French
Melanie: it's not... never mind.
Gerard: what. is he trying to kill you or is he trying to kill someone else?
Josh: HES WEARING THE UNIFORM AN EVERYTHING THIS IS SO WEIIIRD
Melanie: huh, you know I've always taken Tyler for the feminine type, I just never thought he'd wear tights and a skirt.
Pete: pics or it didn't happen
Brendon: ^^^^^
Josh: HELP.
Brendon: is this a new kink between you two? Because I usually don't kink shame but.... killing is a little harsh
Patrick: does he have like, a weapon or something?
Josh: no he's just holding me up against a wall and kissing my neck, why?
Brendon: that's hot like omg
Ryan: BRENDON URIE
Brendon: what? I mean... who said that?
Melanie: what's he doing now?
Josh: he asked me why I was texting
Josh: he just kissed my nose like a dog what the frick
Josh: what does he have now?
Josh: HOO NO HHO NO IM OUT IM OUT NO NOT TIDAY NONONONONO
Pete: what happened?
Gerard: ^
Ryan: ^^
Melanie: ^^^
Brendon: ^^^^
Tyler: I just took out some bracelets for the two of us, I don't know why he seemed so upset.
Josh: THEY WERE HANDCUFFS
Tyler: same thing
Gerard: I wish I had a weird relationship like this
Melanie: I wish I had a relationship period
Patrick: I wish Pete would stop poking me STOP IT
Pete: hahaha
Ryan: wtf Bren get off the floor
Brendon: you kicked me off the bed
Ryan: no I didn't
Brendon: so you did it in your sleep?
Ryan: oh wait now I remember, sorry not sorry.
Brendon: but why?
Ryan: because you smell like crap, take a shower.
Brendon: whelp. there goes my feelings. Thanks babe.
Melanie: um, is anyone else worried about Josh and his little yandere problem?
Pete: I volunteer miss Martinez to investigate the matter.
Melanie: oh heeeellll no. what if I catch them making out on the floor??
Brendon: then you take pictures and run for your life
Melanie: ...why take pictures?
Brendon: ...research
Ryan: I will smack you right now breadbin
Melanie: fine I'll go to there apartment
Gerard: this should be interesting
Patrick: oh hey Gerard, I forgot you were even in this chat
Gerard: fvck you and your fvking fedora
Melanie read the last few texts in the chat, chuckling to herself at Gee's text. She walked through the peach colored hallway of the apartment building until finding the elevator.
Melanie: I'm heading to the kingdom of Joshler right now, just gotta get in my horse carriage and ride all the way there.
Pete: you make it sound so difficult
Melanie: it is when it isn't your vehicle
Brendon: ...did you steal just a car?
Pete: or did you steal a horse carriage? I'm confuzzled.
Melanie: what no! Ashley drives a stick shift and she's letting me borrow it while mine's getting fixed. You really think I would steal a car?
Brendon: yes
Ryan: probably
Patrick: I think you would
Gerard: ^
Melanie: F U all
It was about five minutes until she reached the apartment building, getting out of her car and strutting into the lobby, finding the elevator quickly.
She knew exactly which room they were in, room 322.
She stopped by the door, raising her fist to knock, but then hearing something that sounded like a muffled scream.
"Oh sh** IM COMING JOSH" she yelled and opened the unlocked door and ran towards the sound...
Only to find Tyler who had his legs wrapped around Josh's waist up against the wall with Josh biting at his neck. She slapped a hand over her mouth and slowly backed away.
Melanie: so guys...
Melanie: I heard screaming...
Ryan: and?
Melanie: it was Tyler
Brendon: were they doing "the dance with no pants?"
Brendon: "aggressive cuddling?"
Brendon: "adult nap time?"
Brendon: "hanky panky?"
Ryan: Brendon shut up right now
Patrick: what happened??
Melanie: it turns out they were making out against a wall and Tyler screamed cause Josh was biting his neck
Pete: sh** now I'm picturing it ahh this is weirrdd
Patrick: who bites people's necks? Is Josh a vampire or something?
Ryan: that would explain why he hates garlic bread
Brendon: so does that mean Tyler is now a vampire too?
Gerard: okay can we stop talking about vampire romance? This is just reminding me of Twilight and those were some bad memories I do NOT want to be reminded of
Melanie: fair enough
Tyler: why are you guys talking about us?
Josh: and when did you come in our apartment??
Melanie: well if you two weren't so busy with sucking each other's faces off you would've noticed me
Ryan: ooh she got you there
Pete: wait so does this make them less holy now?
Patrick: did you guys have sex yet?
Josh: Tyler just started choking on air. Pat, what the frick.
Brendon: yeah Pat what the frick... but did you?
Josh: wh- No!
Pete: did you just stutter over text?
Tyler: WE ARE STILL THE HOLIEST OF CHILDREN ALRIGHT I MAY BE COSPLAYING AS MURDERER BUT WE ARE STILL MORE HOLY THEN ALL OF YOU
Gerard: I think Josh is the most holy
Ryan: tru
Josh: what? Why me?
Melanie: because Tyler's always the one who's attacking you and acts all murderous with lollipops.
Josh: and jolly ranchers.... Yeah I guess you're right
Brendon: well I guess we must initiate the coronation for our new addition to the dark side
Tyler: oh sick, where do I sign?
Josh: Tyler you just said you were holy!!
Melanie: we have cookies in the dark side
Tyler: frick yeah I'm in
Josh: Nuuuuuu
Brendon: we are gathered here today to witness the new addition to the dark side, no longer innocent and no longer smol... well he's still smol but no longer innocent. Tyler Robert Joseph. Do you accept this fate?
Tyler: Heck yeah I do
Brendon: HE IS NOW A SINNER
Pete: does he grow devil horns now?
Brendon: nah it's just a title
Pete: oh
Tyler: Josh will have to join us one day
Josh: ...I'm scared
Tyler: you should be
Brendon: well I'm tired of texting for hours at a time, I'm gonna go take a nap on Ryan.
Ryan: GET OFF ME YOU HYPOCRITE
Patrick: I'll do the same with Pete
Pete: wait wtf no patty get off me
Tyler: Josh can I take a nap on you? I feel left out.
Josh: as long as you don't stab me in my sleep.
Tyler: k
Melanie: everyone's sleeping on each other and I'm just over here with the forever alone meme on my face
Gerard: same
Melanie: oh hey Gerard, when did you get here?
Gerard: I hate you all
___________________________
Well wasn't that fantastic
Next chapter is a mystery oooh