~
"Death is no more than passing from one room into another. But there's a difference for me, you know. Because in that other room I shall be able to see."
-Helen Keller
~
"All I'm saying is that your sister is hot," Levi said in defense to Devon.
He laid upside down on the broken couch in Devon's basement with the rest of us. His chin-length dark hair falling into his face.
"All I'm saying is don't get any fucking ideas, she is off limits," Devon said defending his kid sister's honor.
She was only a year younger than us.
Levi agreed but rolled his eyes. They had been arguing about her for over ten minutes and I was more than a little bored listening.
I understood where Levi was coming from. Devon's sister Grace was hot.
But, I also understood where Devon was coming from. With Levi's history with girls, I would be worried too if Levi was suddenly interested in my sister.
"I thought you were dating that blue haired chick?" I asked joining the conversation.
That night was a blur but I remembered her fairly. I still had her number written on my arm in what I'm guessing was permanent marker because it hadn't washed away yet.
Was her name Amber or some shit?
"You mean Ashley? Nah, she's way too out there. Even for me." Levi said admittedly dismissing the idea.
What does he mean by way too out there?
Devon looked at both of us sharply.
"I don't judge, but she's bad news. You guys need to stay clear of her." Devon said warning Levi and me.
She can't be that bad...
Levi and Devon seemed to have switched roles. As now Levi defended Ashley while Devon tried to talk him away from her.
I rolled my eyes. They are both so annoying.
"Can the both of you just shut up?" I asked rudely as my hand itched to reach for a cigarette.
The only reason I wasn't already smoking one was that Devon's mom and siblings were just upstairs.
We were waiting for Michael to show the fuck up but as usual, he was running late.
"What crawled up your ass?" Michael said as he finally joined us in the dark lit room. I rolled my eyes but didn't answer.
"You have been pretty crabby," Devon said agreeing with him. "Yeah, where's Emma I thought she had you on a tight leash?" Levi added with a laugh.
I hated it when they made it their mission to team up on me.
"She's with Ian." I spit out in annoyance.
When she told me she was gonna be hanging out with him I was more than a little upset, but who was I to tell her no?
I wish I could go back to yesterday when it was just the two of us.
Hanging out at her house then hanging out at mine. Drawing at her house then painting at mine. But, no.
"Who is Ian?" Levi asked sitting up quickly. I rolled my eyes, he is such a gossip queen.
"He's her ex," Devon said supplying the answer for me. "Personally, I think it's really cool that you let her hang out with him."
I rolled my eyes, I didn't let her do anything. Emma made her own choices. Even if I told her I didn't like her hanging out with him, she probably still would.
"Bullshit, are you saying you would be cool with Rebecca hanging out with her ex?" Michael asked as he sat down on the pink fuzzy bean bag.
Devon turned to him quickly, "of course I wouldn't be."
Fucking wanker.
Michael turned to me.
"I heard you entered that art competition Levi and I told you about." He said as he grinned at me.
When he grinned it only showed the striking resemblance that we shared.
We often got confused as brothers with our short curly blond hair and familiar eyes.
"Yeah, I did," I said bored.
I'm not sure how I found the time but I was able to finish and turn in my collection to Mr.S.
"So you finally listened to us, about time," Levi said with a cocky smile.
Instead of telling him the truth about why I entered the contest I rolled my eyes.
"I doubt I'll win," I said honestly as I looked down at my shirt.
I was wearing a simple Blink 182 tee and sweatpants.
"You need to have more faith in yourself," Michael said sounding like my mother.
I rolled my eyes. I love my friends, I guess, but I honestly didn't feel like hanging out with them right now.
I was tired of them passing judgment on my life, I was tired of hearing everyone's opinions.
I just want to lay in bed and wake up to a better day.
"How'd your date go?" Devon asked changing the subject from my life to Michael's.
Michael ran his fingers through his short hair with a sigh.
"It was less than favorable."
"What happened?" I asked in wonder.
"I'd really rather not talk about it." He said frowning in the distance. I nodded my head in understanding.
Sometimes, it was easier to just not talk about it. Sometimes, if you ignore the problem enough it goes away. Or, at least I think so.
I took out a cigarette not giving a shit anymore, I needed a smoke.
I lit it, just as I was about to take a drag Devon snatched it from me and put it out.
"What the hell man?" I asked in annoyance.
"You know better than to do that when my family is home, plus you reminded me why I invited you guys over," Devon said easily.
I didn't care that he was right, I need a smoke. And, I need it now.
We all looked at Devon waiting for him to say whatever it was he brought us here for.
In a way, this was the first time that all of us had hung out together in a while.
Levi was always off doing who knows what with who knows who.
And, with every passing day, it seemed Devon spent more time with stupid Rebecca and her friends than with us.
I was always off with Emma.
And, Michael... well I'm not really sure what he's been up to.
We had gone from hanging out every day to just seeing each other in passing every once in a while.
I felt like a shit friend as I thought of all the times I blew them off these last few weeks.
"I'm done smoking pot, I'm done drinking, I'm done wasting my time trying to get into an altered state of mind," Devon said breaking my train of thought.
What?
I did not expect him to say that.
"What are you talking about?" Michael said asking my very thought.
Devon sighed rubbing his hand on his head. "We can still all be friends, but I'd just like it if you guy didn't do that stuff around me. Our Friday hangs will have to stop-"
"Where the fuck is all this coming from?" Levi asked raising his voice.
With each passing moment my irritation and need to smoke only increased.
I could feel a headache coming on.
"Can you lower your voice," Devon said hushing Levi but avoiding the question.
"It was Rebecca wasn't it?" I asked already knowing the answer. Where else would all this be coming from?
"N-" he started to say but I cut him off. "Don't lie." He sighed.
"Yes, it was her suggestion. But, it was my choice." Devon said quickly.
"Unbelievable, you're picking a girl over your friends?" Levi yelled as he paced back and forth. His hands pulling at his hair.
I wasn't sure what to think right now. Based on Michael's silence he wasn't sure what to say either.
"We can still ha-" Devon started to say but Levi cut him off. "Whatever man, do what you want." He said before grabbing his jacket and leaving.
He stomped on each step as he climbed up the stairs and left.
Well shit.
Levi and Devon have always fought and bumped head but it never ended that badly.
Most of the time they fought simply because Levi enjoyed being a hot head a little too much, but this time I could understand where he was coming from.
"I can't believe him, always so dramatic," Devon said blowing off the whole exchange.
Devon and I have been friends since elementary school, but at this moment it felt like I didn't know who he was.
"Look I get it, you don't have to do that stuff if you don't want to. But, Levi isn't wrong." Micheal said finally.
Levi had joined our friend group in the sixth grade. Michael was the last to join our group back in freshmen year.
"I don't want to have to choose," Devon said sounding almost pained. Michael laughed bitterly. "I think you already made your choice, man." He said as he stood up and put his jacket on.
He walked over to the stairs and stopped before turning to me "you coming?" He asked me.
I didn't even have to think about it as I stood up and put my jacket on.
"I thought you would understand, Daniel," Devon said calling me out.
I sighed. "I do understand, I just really need a smoke," I said waving my pack of cigarettes in my hand.
Michael left up the stairs.
"Give them time to cool down, they will come around," I said tiredly looking at Devon once more before turning and walking up the basement stairs.
Once upstairs I walked towards the front door but stopped as I noticed Levi and Grace talking in hushed voices to one another in the living room.
I thought he left already...
"Do you need a ride?" I asked making them both flinch as they turned to me quickly.
Grace noticeably took a step away from Levi as she blushed slightly.
Her black spiral curls of hair bouncing with her step.
"Yeah, thanks," Levi said answering my question before looking over to Grace before walking out the front door.
I looked over to Grace, but she wasn't looking at me. She was looking at the direction Levi had just left from.
Something was definitely going on between them. I should have noticed sooner with the way he spoke about her.
Devon is gonna lose his shit if he ever found out.
With that, I left out the house.
Levi was waiting outside leaning against my car.
I took out a cigarette and lit it. I took a deep drag, but it didn't help. I still felt like I needed something, but I couldn't place what it was.
"Be careful, Vi," I said calling him his nickname as I unlocked the car.
We both got in, he didn't need to question what I meant because he knew.
I tried to focus on driving but my hand kept shaking.
I dropped Levi off at his house.
I quickly dialed the number to the one person I could think of that would help me get a good fix.
"Hello?" The voice asked once they picked up. "It's me, Daniel," I said trying to keep my voice even.
"What took you so long to call, Loverboy?" Ashley asked into the phone.
[Published February 19th, 2017]
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A/N: Sorry this chapter is a day late, I was having trouble getting this chapter to post. Thank you to everyone reading, I'm so thankful to all of you for bringing this story to almost 3k reads so quickly!
If you liked it, I would love it if you could vote or comment what you think!