I was sittin on Joi's front porch wonderin where the hell I would go now. It was Monday and I had already been here a full day and that n!gga Shawn was on my case somethin hard for some reason. He was really buggin me. I was already on my third cigarette and about to light up my blunt when Shawn came outside with Quis right behind him. Quis ran to Joi's car while Shawn stood on the edge of the porch and he looked at me shakin his head. "I know u gettin tired of me talkin to u but don't smoke that blunt right here. Joi is a police officer if u didn't know." I looked at him and rolled my eyes. I wanted to say somethin so bad but I decided not to.
Joi came out a minute later smilin at me. "Did u wanna go with Shawn today. He's goin to go get his car and maybe ya'll can ride out somewhere together?"
"No thanks," I said puttin my blunts inside my cigarette box. I stood up and wiped my legs off from the weed ends. "I won't be here when u get back."
Joi stopped in her tracks and her smile was now gone. "Why? Where are u gonna go?"
"I don't know. I don't wanna be a burden on ya'll."
"U not bein a burden on us." Shawn scoffed at me and walked down to meet Quis at the car.
Joi walked over to me straightenin out her police uniform and she made me sit down with her. "Beyonce please don't leave. I was thinkin maybe when I got off today, we could hang out maybe go to the movies or have a girls day gettin a pedi and manicure."
"I don't wanna spend money on that stuff. I got other things to use money for."
"Like more weed? Beyonce u need to get real."
"Joi, I appreciate what u've done for me but I'm not gone change. I can't."
"Why?"
I looked at her and could see that she was more than concerned for me than I was for myself. I smiled and held my head down shakin my head. She had so much confidence in me and I couldn't figure out why. I took off my shades and looked at her. "I'm ghetto, that's why. Even Shawn can see that. Like he told me, he's real man and I can see that he's disgusted with me and I don't wanna be around him anymore. He makes me uncomfortable."
"In what way? Did he do somethin to u."
"No and sadly that's my problem. I wanted to f#ck him Joi and he wouldn't even touch me."
"But u gotta understand...Shawn's been thru some things that we can talk about only if u stay here please. I'm beggin u Beyonce. I can tell u wanna change. Give me a chance to help u. What's the worst that could happen?" She spoke while pattin the back of my hand and starin into my eyes.
I wanted to change just for her but change had to start with urself right? I wasn't ready to just yet so I lied to her. "Ahight I'll be here when u come home. I won't go anywhere but just for today Joi."
"Okay. I'll take that. I'll be home by seven. I'm sure Quis will be here at two somethin so please just wait for me Beyonce." She smiled at me and patted the back of my hand once more before gettin up and runnin down the porch steps. As she got into the driver's side, Shawn looked at me with a smirk on his face. I slid my shades back on and walked back into the house.
How could she trust me like this alone in her house. She didn't even know me that well. She really had a good heart. I ran upstairs to Quis' room where I had my stuff and i plopped on the floor to pick somethin outta my bag to wear today. As I laid out one outfit, my cell began to ring. I saw Ty's number on the screen and I ignored it. This was his first time callin me since he dropped me off at home from the club Saturday mornin. He called again and I ignored him again. I realized that I had a text message when I looked at the time.
I went thru my messages to read it:
What's up Beyonce. This Money. I wanna see u. I apologize for what I did to u but I wanna see u and tell u how muched I missed u.
I scrunched my face up at the message knowin there had to be somethin up as to why he was callin and textin me all of a sudden. Maybe he realized that I had taken his money and he wanted revenge. I ignored that and ended up pressin accept when my phone rang again. When I saw that I had linked myself into talkin with Ty, I let out a huge sigh and spoke wit him. "What b!tch?"
"B!tch why u ain't answerin my ma-f#ckin calls?"
"I don't hafta answa to yo ass. U wanna act all funny and shit, B!tch I can do it too."
"When did I act funny? Before or afta u slammed my ma-f#ckin do like some hood gobblin?"
"B!tch whatever, u betta be glad that's all I did. I should have broken that shit and flatted yo tires."
"Bet on it then!"
"Look wtf u want?"
"Where u at? U know I ain't got no damn job, I need somebody to hang wit."
"Well call Di'Jonae and ya'll can hang low all day."
"Come on Beyonce, u know we fight all the time like this. It's yo damn fault anyways."
"Well why call me then."
"WTF is u mad at?"
"U know what, it don't even matter no mo."
We both got quiet for a minute and I knew I wouldn't be able to keep bein mad at him but I really couldn't stand his ass sometimes. "So u want me to come see or not?"
"I'm not at home."
"Where u at? Tips?"
"No."
"Another n!gga!"
"NO!"
"Then where."
"Joi's house."
"Joi's house? WTF u doin over there. She havin another bbq?"
"STFU. She want me to be here. She wanna be my friend unlike yo ass."
"I called u didn't I? U want me to come over?"
"Come pick me up."
I hopped in the shower to take a quick rinse and my cell rung again. I just knew it was Ty callin back probably forgettin where Joi lived. I grabbed my cell not even lookin and continued to rinse my body off as I talked. " Let me guess, u need the directions right?"
"Yeah u gone give 'em to me." My heart dropped to my feet when I heard Money on the other line.
"Man, why do u keep on callin me like somethin crazy?"
"I miss that p#ssy baby. Where u at?"
"N!gga bye," I said hangin up only for him to call again. I turned my phone off and hoped that Ty would remember where Joi's place was.
I got dressed in:
This time Tyler would hafta wait on me cause I was gonna curl my hair whether he liked it or not. I walked to my room to grab my flat iron and I walked back to the bathroom to plug it up. I took my hair down from the bun and ran my hands thru it. I grabbed my comb and combed it as the flat iron heated up. I sat the comb down and ran down the steps to grab a beer from the fridge. I hadn't even ate nothin this mornin but I still needed a beer. I saw that the pack I took from my dad still was full. Shawn or nobody else hadn't taken one. I connected my brows and shrugged my shoulders. Usually the box would have had only one or two left in there at my house.
I popped the top open and took a large gulp. I ran back upstairs to the bathroom to test the iron. It was already hot.
I was not even halfway done with my hair, when I heard the front door open and close. I didn't think it was Shawn so I ran down the steps, to see who it was. It was him. "Yes?" He said as I stared at him but I didn't say anythin. I ran back up the steps to finish my hair. I heard him comin and I closed the bathroom door. About ten minutes later, he knocked on the door.
"Man what," I said suckin my teeth.
"Why u gotta talk to me like that? Chill out gurl. I need to use the bathroom."
"I'm not done with my hair."
"I didn't ask u none of that."
I snatched the door open sendin wind thru my hair. "Shawn would u leave me the f#ck alone shawty? U gettin on my ma-f#ckin nerves. I'm not yo b!tch so stop tryna control me!"
"U'll neva be that. I'on like ghetto hoes."
"Whatver. This would be the best p#ssy u done ever had n!gga."
"N!gga?"
"Yeah what u white?"
"Gurl," he said laughin me off. "I'ma let u have this right here. U don't know when to respect yo elders. U talk too much shit for me."
"And so? N!gga I'm twenty years old, I'm a grown ass woman."
"Oh yeah? Well I haven't noticed. Dressin like u about to go to a damn strip club. Get real," he said walkin off towards the steps.
For some reason I wanted to keep arguin wit him but he didn't wanna give me the satisfaction but I yelled after him anyways stickin my head out the door. "I bet u would pay me if I was in the strip club wit this on. U probably dream about this ass all night long, punk."
He didn't say anythin to me and that made me even more mad. I wanted to go downstairs and slap the shit out of him. I decided to just finish my beer and continue with my hair. Two minutes later, I heard the doorbell ring and I ran down the steps to get it. Shawn was in the middle of yellin 'who is it'. "Yo don't answer that door."
"Why," I said ignorin him continuin to walk to it. He got up to follow me and I ran. I snatched open the door and Ty was standin there lookin crazy.
"Who u?" Shawn said snatchin me behind him and standin in front of the door.
"I'm Ty. Who u?" Ty said in his girly voice compared to Shawn's deep northern filled voice.
"What u want?"
"N!gga, he's here for me."
"Why?I thought u said u was stayin here?"
"I'll be back later."
"U said u wasn't goin nowhere and if that's what u told my cousin, don't disrespect her by lyin when she givin u a place to stay."
I looked at him not believin he was actin like this. Like my big brother or somethin. "What! He can't come in?"
"He can come in but u ain't goin nowhere." I let out a loud ass scream and stomped back towards the steps. Shawn let Ty in and he followed me upstairs.
Once we both got into the bathroom, I closed the door as Ty laughed. "That shit ain't funny man. He pissin me off thinkin he runnin me around here. I can't be here."
"Girl he is not playin, haaah! He had me scared a little bit."
"I sware Joi gone be mad at me if he keep f#ckin around cause I'ma woop his ass."
"I strongly doubt that. He bigger than Tip so I'ma guess he'll beat that ass. And I ain't realize how fine the n!gga was either. Mmmh boi."
I finished my hair and we walked downstairs where Shawn was missin. "Let's just go Bey." As soon as I got close to the door, Shawn came out of the kitchen starin at me.
"I don't even have my purse shawty. I'm goin right here on the front porch."
"U betta," he said smilin like he knew somethin if I didn't.
We got outside and sat on the swing together. Ty continued to laugh and I thought of a way to get outta here. I came up wit the plan that Ty would go get my purse. He would pretend to be goin to the bathroom. So he went inside as I sat there waitin for my plan to go thru. It only took three minutes and Ty tossed me my purse and he walked calmly to his car to crank it up. Once he got inside and waved to me, I got up began to run towards the car.
As soon as my foot hit that bottom step, the front door came open and Shawn came out runnin. He was too fast for me. I saw Ty sayin 'oh shit' and I tried to run faster but my flip flop made me trip and I nearly fell and he caught me. He tossed me over his shoulder as I kicked and screamed. He told Ty to get the f#ck on and he didn't hesitate. "Put me the f#ck down shawty!"
He continued to ignore me and carry me into the house. He took me upstairs and tossed me on Quis bed. I bounced right back up and pushed him. He turned around to stare at me like he wasn't sure what I was doin.
"Don't put yo hands on me, n!gga."
"U told my cousin u gone be here and that's what u gone do. If u wanna try some more shit, then come on."
"I'm hungry."
"I'll make u somethin, what u want."
"What! That's it. Get the f#ck outta my way," I said pushin him again but he pushed me back onto the bed. I could tell I was pushin his buttons and I liked it.
I pushed him again and this time, I followed with a slap on his head. He spun me around so quick and wrapped my arms around myself with his ontop and he held me. "Let me know when u done."
"Uh uhn, let me go. LET ME GO!"
"We can wait."
"Let me GO SHAWN!"
The more I squirmed the tighter he held onto me. After twenty minutes, literally, I realized he was serious. I stopped and stood there. "U done?" I ignored him and he took that as a yes. He let me go and as I turned around he stared at me. We stood there starin at one another for a minute and then I did it. I kissed him. I tried to part his lips with my tongue but he pushed me off him. "WTF was that?"