Unconditional (Book Two)

De airplanelover52

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Jim Parsons Fanfiction 'Unconditional' is book two of 'Time & Time Again' fanfiction duology. After a long fi... Mais

Prologue
1. Distraction
2. Threat
3. Impossible
4. Forgotten
5. Wrong Possibility
6. Impediment
7. One Remains
8. Curiosity
9. Reverse Story Teller
10. Inquires
11. Eyes
12. Yet
13. Dreams
14. Clues & Suspicious Guesses
15. Proof
17. Golden Flames
18. Unrecovered Recovery
19. Risks
20. Nostalgia
21. Where Our Memories Lay {Pt. One}
22. Where Our Memories Lay {Pt. Two}
23. Where Our Memories Lay {Pt. Three}
24. Letting Go
25. Unexpected Listener
26. Emotional Mixture
27. Pictures on the Walls
28. Not to Expect
29. Lies
30. Unconditional { Part One }
31. Unconditional { Part Two }
32. Unconditional { Part Three }
33. All Can't Be Miserable
34. Thunderstorms to Sun Rays
37. What About it All?
36. To Love You Again

16. Sunken Hearts

131 8 7
De airplanelover52

Amelie's POV

I arrive at my house, and leave my bag on top of the kitchen table, as I then approach my room. I can't deny that I am a bit nervous of Colin's reaction when I tell him I've been hanging out with Jim Parsons all afternoon, AND that he's coming over for dinner tonight. On the other hand, I can't deny either that I felt a really strange connection between Jim and I, and that there is a weird feeling hunting me at the moment; he has also became a really good friend of mine...at least that's how I could consider it.

I take the doorknob of the room in my hand, and turn it slowly, as I walk in.

"Hi," says Colin, who is laying on the bed with the TV on.

"Oh...hi," I say surprised, as I didn't expect he would be home. "I didn't know you'd arrive early."

I climb on the bed, and place a small kiss on his cheek, as he then turns to me and kisses my lips softly, wrapping an arm around me as I lay besides him.

"So, what did you do all afternoon?" he asks with his eyes fixed on the television.

I feel my stomach sinking in preoccupation, as he pops this question out of his mouth, though I try to hide the way I'm feeling.

"Ummm...I was out with a friend," I say, sounding calm, but feeling anxious.

"Really?" he asks, caressing my arm. "Who?"

I was afraid of this, I was so so afraid of this, but I was going to have to tell him anyways so...what's the point on hiding it much longer.

"Colin," I start, sitting up on the bed, and turning to look at him. He turns off the TV, and fixes a pair of confused eyes on mine, as he notices the tone of worry I'm using in my voice. "Can you promise me you won't get mad?"

"Mad?" he asks in bewilderment. "Why would I get mad? Who did you see?"

I sigh, and move my eyes to the ground, as I find the right words to speak. "I was out with Jim...Jim Parsons."

Colin throws another look of total confusion at me, and drops the control at the table besides the bed. "Seriously? You were out with Jim Parsons all afternoon?"

I nod, fixing my eyes on my husband, and back to the ground again.

"Ah," he speaks, trying to save his unhappiness. "Well...umm...that's...unexpected." Colin makes a small pause, as he clears his throat and takes a deep breath to control his irritation. "And...what did you guys talk about?"

"Well..." I start, hesitating on giving the news. "I...don't kill me okay? But I....I invited him over to have dinner."

"What?!"

"He's so nice, and I just thought maybe—"

"No no no no, you can have dinner with him, but I'm gonna leave."

"Ohhh come on!!" I beg. "He is so nice, you don't even know him, and I really do think you could get to like him as much as I do."

"Amelieeee," complains Colin.

"Pleaaaseee, Colin. If you don't want to do it for him then do it for me okay? Give it a chance pleaseee, just this time."

I press my hands together in praying manner, and stare at him with a sweet, begging pout, hoping he agrees.

Colin sighs, and rolls his eyes up to the ceiling. "Ugh...ok," he speaks, giving up. "BUT...under one condition."

"Yes, what's that?" I ask with a smile.

"That you go to the supermarket and buy a box of my favorite chocolates so that I can eat my anger up once he's gone."

I laugh, but nod my head in affirmation. "I don't really think you'll have to eat your anger up once you meet him, but...alright, I'll buy you your box of chocolates. I was going to go to the supermarket anyways, so that I could buy everything to prepare some delicious Mexican food."

"Ohhh great," he says sarcastically. "Lets prepare his favorite food."

"Ohh come on, he's our guest. Be nice."

Colin rolls his eyes once more, but smiles as I approach him to kiss his forehead.

"I'll be right back," I say, jumping off the bed, and grabbing my phone.

"Alright, sweetie. Take care please."

"I will," I reply, opening the door of the room. "Oh, and Colin..."

"Yes?" he asks, with his eyes now fixed on the newspaper in his hands.

"Thank you."


Jim's POV

I keep staring at Amelie and Colin's marriage certificate, as my heart sinks deeper and deeper on my painful chest.

"But...it doesn't make sense, I..."

"Jim," says Mayim gently, and approaching me. "It is what it is. And...I don't understand why it hurts you so much that you're not married to her. I thought it would be a relief for you."

I turn to look at her with a sort of depressed expression in my face...sort of because I'm trying to hide it...and in some way I do realize she's right. It should be a relief to find out that you're not married to a total stranger, but Amelie doesn't feel like a total stranger to me at all. I feel like she's a very close friend right now, an immediate and magical connection, plus...even though I am TERRIFIED of admitting this...I love the girl, and there is no way I can keep fooling myself about it.

"It's not, Mayim," I say, as my eyes glow with the tears shaping in them. "Because then...all the questions in my mind aren't cleared. What is this? What is my ring about? What is the necklace about? What are the headaches about? The house? My feelings? My dreams?"

"Dreams?" asks Mayim, puzzled. "What dreams?"

I sigh, and look down at the ground. "I had some strange dreams earlier today when I fell asleep on the couch. They felt a lot more like memories than dreams, memories that were trying to free themselves, memories from when...I met and loved Amelie."

I can see that Mayim's eyes start getting watery, and I sense that there is something wrong with her as well, as if she knew something I didn't.

"And your feelings?" she asks with gentleness, and with sorrow showing on her voice. "What do you feel?"

I stay silent for a few moments, until I suddenly let a breath escape my lungs. "Never mind," I say, walking away from her, and dropping the paper on top of the table.

"But—"

"Just forget I said something about my feelings," I say. I don't really want to let Mayim know the way I feel for Amelie. At the end of the day, it is wrong, she is a married woman, and I shouldn't be feeling this way for her...and I have a girlfriend...a girlfriend who has been giving me reasons as to why think Amelie and I are what I thought we were...but if that's not it...then I seriously have no idea what she's hiding, even though that's not what's important right now, the issue is that I have a girlfriend, and I've fallen in love with another girl.

"But, Jim...it is important that you let your feelings out...you know, talk about—"

"I'm going to have dinner over at Amelie's tonight..." I interrupt, as Mayim stares at me with a pair of still saddened eyes. "And after that...I just want to go back to LA."

My feelings are eating every single part of me right now. I have to go back to LA—even though I still had two days left in NYC—and forget about Amelie forever. I can't continue being around her, and I can't continue setting up ideas inside my mind like the one's I had been setting up because at the end they just end up crushing your heart once it's already vulnerable.

I open the door of my apartment just after I grab my phone and keys from the table.

"Where are you going?" asks Mayim, interrupting a moment of dead silence.

"Oh, I'll go to the supermarket. I can't arrive at Amelie's empty handed."

"Ah right," she speaks, as I notice she is still trying to take control over her sorrow. "Have fun."

I smile at her weakly, and continue walking out the door.

"...Jim wait," she speaks, making me stop once more. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry things didn't go your way."

I look down at the ground in heartache again, but then stare at my friend directly to the eyes. "Don't apologize, Mayim, it wasn't your fault. Thank you for making me realize I was thinking nonsense before I freaked Amelie out."

Mayim smiles weakly at me, and nods her head once. "You're welcome. Have fun, Jim."

"Thank you," I reply, and finally close the door behind me.


Amelie's POV

I walk out of my car after I station it in front of the supermarket where I'll buy everything to make a delicious Mexican dinner, and get Colin's favorite chocolates. I take several steps froward, crossing the street to reach the sidewalk and then start towards the entrance glass doors. But before I can reach them, I see a tall, thin figure reflected on the glass that is walking a few feet behind me with his eyes fixed on the phone.

"Jim?" I say, turning to look at him.

Jim moves his attention from the screen of his golden iPhone, and fixes his eyes on me with confusion reflected on his ocean blue irises.

"Hey, Amelie!" he says with a smile once he realizes I'm the one calling his name.

"Heyyy," I reply with a smile. "What are you doing here?"

Jim turns his phone off, and places it inside the pocket of his jeans, approaching me. "Well, I couldn't arrive at your house empty handed."

"Oh, don't be silly," I speak. "You didn't have to bring anything."

"Well," he says, shrugging. "Too late."

We both laugh, our voices mixing in a harmonious sound that fills the entire space around us.

"Come on," I say, taking him by the arm. "Join me."

Jim and I walk through the automatic glass doors of the supermarket, as the cold breeze from the winter weather outside, switches into the warm, cozy breeze inside the supermarket.

Jim walks forward and takes a cart, as I walk next to him.

"So," he starts, walking slowly towards the halls. "What's the first thing we need?"

But before I can even answer, a blonde girl, about fourteen years old, approaches him with a nervous but excited expression on her face.

"Excuse me, Mr. Parsons," she says with a smile and a trembling voice, as Jim turns to her. "May I have a picture with you."

Jim's lips curve into a smile, and he takes a step forward to put an arm around the girl. "Of course!" he speaks with enthusiasm.

The girl takes the phone in her hand to take a selfie, and snaps a picture of the two of them a few seconds later.

"Thank you very very much," she speaks, as she can't contain her happiness.

"Oh no, thank YOU," says Jim. "What's your name?"

"Shelby," she answers with a smile. "It's very nice meeting you."

"And it's very nice meeting you, too, Shelby. I hope you have a wonderful day."

"And you too, Jim. Again, thank you."

"Oh, no problem," he speaks, still wearing the smile on his face.

Shelby turns around and takes a step forward, but then stops before she continues walking.

"Hey, may I ask you a question?"

"Sure," says Jim, still wearing his kind face.

"...how long..." but Shelby doesn't finish the sentence, she simply giggles a little, and shakes her head. "You know what? Forget the question, it's silly. Have a great day, Jim." And the girl continues walking away from us.

Jim stares at her as she walks away with confusion, and then turns to me.

"That was weird," he states, as he takes the cart again, continuing towards the hallways.

"It was," I laugh, as I continue besides him. "But I just love how you never say 'no' to your fans."

"Ohhh no. I wouldn't be able to, I would feel too bad to say 'no'."

I laugh a little, as we continue walking. "But...what do you do if you're in a rush?"

Jim ponders over the question, looking at the ceiling. "Well..." he starts then stopping. I can see that he looks around, and his eyes gloom as he looks at...something. "This," he states, and starts towards the costume area.

I look at him, confused about what he'll do, but as I see that he takes a blonde wig from one of the sections, I can't help but start laughing my face off. He starts walking towards me with his hands on his hips, and trying to contain his laughter.

"From now on," he says, speaking in a high-pitched, female voice. "I am not Jim...I am Jamie."

I can't help but start crying of laughter. Tears start falling down my eyes, and I put my hands on my stomach, as it hurts.

"HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA, JIM!" I speak, as he starts laughing with me.

"I'm not Jim, I'm Jamie," he states with a laugh escaping his lips, and now using his regular male voice. "Ok." Jim switches to his girl voice again, as I just continue cracking. "Lets go."

Jim stops in front of the refrigerated things, as I look for what I need.

"Sooo," he starts, still using his high-pitched voice, and looking around. "What do we need?"

I look at him, trying to be serious, but still struggle to contain my laughter.

"Ummm," I start, smiling. "I have to search for pork."

"Pork?" he asks a little confused, and in high pitch.

"Yes," I continue. "Okay, I wanted to surprise you, but since I found you here then...I'll spoil it for you. I'm cooking Mexican food."

"Awwwwwwww," he says with his regular voice, and then switches to Jamie's. "You didn't have to. That's so sweet."

I start laughing again at his female imitation, and finally take the pork to make some delicious Cochinita Pibil.

I feel...something warm inside me. I am happy, but like...FULLY happy. It's been a while since the last time I felt like this, because I just felt like something in my life wasn't right...and for some reason, I feel like it's back.

"I was gonna get you a chocolate cake, girl," says Jim, with his hands on his hips, and making me laugh again. "But I'll take that once we're—" But Jim stops talking, and gasps.

I couldn't help it, I just couldn't help it. I had to record him so that I could keep some memory of this.

"Amelie!" he says with his regular voice, and laughing, as I laugh my face off too. "Give me—"

"No," I say giggling, and turning around as he tries to snatch the phone from my hand.

I start running away from him in a laugh, and he starts chasing me, laughing as well. I feel some electricity rushing through my head...and I get a very blurry vision...a vision that shows the same man with dark hair that calls me Ams chasing me with a snowball in his hands, and in a city covered in snow.


"What the hell are you doing?" I asked with curiosity.

He didn't say a word, but simply came back up, and that's when I saw he was carrying a huge snowball in his hand.

"You better run," he said with a laugh.

I opened my mouth, and started laughing, too, then started running away from him on the city of Quebec, my high heels tapping on the floor. Since he was very tall I would wear high heels many times, so I was an expert walking on them...thanks to him.

I ran and ran, laughing intensely. I looked back, and saw that he got nearer and nearer, of course...laughing intensely, too. I knew he was going to reach me because he was fast, but I just loved making him come after me.

I suddenly listened to him shout something, making me laugh even more, and then...I felt something cold hitting me on my back.

I turned around and looked at him with a jokingly mad face, and he was laughing like crazy. I took advantage of his distraction and took an insane amount of snow in my hands, making an even bigger snowball than his.

He had his eyes closed, and I didn't hesitate on throwing the ball of snow at him, hitting him directly on his left shoulder.

With this, he stopped laughing, and looked directly at me, as I was the one laughing this time.

"You're dead," he said with a laugh, and started running towards me, as I kept laughing and started running away from him, too. The chasing started again, but this time, he didn't have a snowball in his hands, he was simply chasing me for fun.

I continued running, feeling the cold breeze hitting my face, though I couldn't stop laughing. I entered a nice park that was full of fluffy snow, a place where you could just throw yourself to the ground and do snow angels, as he got closer and closer to me. I could listen to his laughter getting louder as he ran faster, until I listened to him laughing in my ear, and he wrapped his arms around my waist, making both of us fall to the ground.

We landed on top of some soft, white snow, next to each other, as we kept laughing like crazy.

He moved closer to me, and I rested my head on his chest, as we both looked at the sky. More and more white snowflakes were falling from it, and landing on top of my face, making me feel them as they slowly melt.

"Ready to go back to the cabin?" he said, stroking my chin.

"Yes," I replied. "Lets go."


I come back to reality, still laughing...but feeling some sort of emptiness in my chest as I feel the NEED to recognize that man. Jim is fast, and before I can even notice, his strong arms are wrapped around my waist.

"Jim," I say between laughter.

"Nahaa, give it to me," he says, using his regular voice, and laughing as well.

I turn and turn, as we're laughing our faces off, trying to be set free from his arms...even though, for some reason, I feel protected, and I don't want him to let me go.

"Gahh," he shouts, as he takes the phone, but I end up snatching it from his hand again.

He keeps enveloping my waist with his arms as we laugh and fight to keep the phone.

"Give it to me, Amelie," he states between laughter.

He keeps struggling to take it away, as I keep turning and turning...until, because I was turning and laughing with such force, I turn my body to face him. We are just inches away, his arms are wrapped around my waist, and in that moment, we just stare at each other deep into the eyes with just smiles and no laughter, concentrated on feeling each other's warmth and thoughts...and I realize...the way he is looking at me, and the way he is holding me is so beautiful and so familiar.

Things start building up in my head, really crazy things...but also things I can't help but wonder. Is Jim the guy who appears blurry in my mind? Or is it Colin, just like he has stated, and I'm just thinking craziness? I really don't know, but what I'm aware of is that...I am starting to develop some strong feelings for Jim...and it is wrong. I am a married woman, and I shouldn't be feeling this way for another man, and even less a man I met today. But the real question here is...did I really just meet him today? But why would Colin be lying? Why would he tell me he is the blurry man in my dreams, and lie? That's nonsense, but...for some reason, I don't feel it anymore, I used to feel it, but not anymore...even though I don't find a reason why Colin would lie about something as big as this.

"Amelie," starts Jim with a gentle tone, as his arms are still wrapped on me, and his eyes are still fixed on mine. I feel warmth spreading inside my heart, as I concentrate on those big, ocean blue eyes, a pair of ocean blue eyes that give me a feeling that makes me want to get lost in this man's arms, and never let go. "Just promise me you won't show that to anyone," he states between laughter.

I laugh, too, as I then fix my eyes on his again. "I promise," I speak, using a sweet tone.

Jim smiles, and then looks to the ground, letting me go, and acting as a girl again.

"Okay, so," he continues with his hands on his hips. "What's next?"


Colin's POV

It is 7:30 pm, and there is a knock on the door. I know who it is...it is the idiot of Jim Parsons. I DESPISE HIM! And I am burning in rage because he found Amelie, and because they've become friends...even though them not recovering their memories is the best thing that could've happened to me, since it is now guaranteed that they'll NEVER get them back. On the other hand, I can see that the paper Mayim showed him earlier today didn't keep him away from us, so the only reason why I agreed to let him come is because I will end this myself...and I have the perfect way to do it.

"Hi!" says Amelie cheerfully, as she opens the door, and Jim walks in.

I feel disgust as that idiot hugs my wife, but I stand up from the couch, and start towards them to introduce myself.

"Jim," starts Amelie, standing between the two of us. "This is my husband Colin."

"It is very nice to finally meet you," he says, stretching his arm out to shake my hand.

I don't say a word, I simply force a smile I couldn't make more obvious was a fake one, and shake his hand. I can feel how strange and awkward he feels, since he doesn't have an idea of the actual situation we are in...I made his wife think she's my wife...and the idiot has no idea.

"O...kay," says Amelie, breaking the tension. "The girls should be here any minute, so...feel comfortable, Jim, our home is your home."

"Awww, thank you very much, Ams."

Ams? AMS?! DID HE SERIOUSLY JUST CALLED HER THAT?! Ohhhohoh no...this is it! I will stop this madness tonight!

Jim starts towards the living room, as I see Amelie just looks at him with a smile, and then approaches me.

"He's our guest, please treat him nicely," she whispers in my ear, and then walks towards the kitchen to check on the meal.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

The girls arrived a few minutes later, and at the sight of that idiot, they started shouting and crying and going insane. They took like a billion pictures with the man, and now we are all sitting on the table having dinner. I am not thrilled to have Amelie sitting between Jim and I, since I don't want her to be sitting besides him, especially because they can't stop engaging in conversation.

"Mmmmmm, Amelie this is delicious!" he speaks, taking another mouthful of chochinita pibil into his mouth.

"It truly is," agrees Danielle.

I can feel my blood boiling in anger every time that idiot opens his mouth. I can't stand his voice! I CAN'T STAND IT!

"Thank you very much! I am glad you guys like it," states Amelie, smiling.

I can see the way he looks at her, how they smile at each other, and then look back to their plates shyly. They feel it, I know they feel something, and it is making me fire up in complete rage and hatred...I am boiling in anger. I WILL END THIS NOW! JIM WILL DISAPPEAR FROM OUR LIVES FOREVER!

"I'll get another glass of wine," I start, leaving my seat. "Would you like another glass of wine, Jim?"

"Ohh, please...thank you very much," he says, and hands the wine glass to me.

I smile, trying to avoid making it evil, and take his glass in my hand. "No problem."

I start towards the kitchen counter, somewhere where no one can see what I'm doing, and fill the two clear glasses with red wine. There is a strong scent of alcohol running through my nostrils, as the two glasses sit in front of me, and I put my hand on the inside pocket of my blazer, taking a small bottle with a clear substance in it...Polonium. Polonium is one of the most poisonous and toxic substances in existence. It is very rare, and very hard to come by...though I have my contacts. Only a small drop of it could kill you, even though the killing is slow. If Jim drinks this, he will be dead in about four to five months or so...a slow death by radioactive poisoning...and he'll finally leave my wife and I alone.

I pour in the substance into his glass of wine, as I can listen to the laughter and chatter in the background.

"You are so dead," I whisper evilly, and chuckle, as I then take the two glasses of wine, and turn around to start towards the people again. "Here you go, Jim," I say, handing him the glass with the Polonium, and taking my seat.

"Ohhh, thank you very much, Colin," he says, and taking the glass on his hands.

I stare at him every single second, monitoring his every move, as I am just waiting for him to take drink.

He eats one more mouthful of meat, and keeps laughing at whatever the people are talking about.

You might be happy...but not for long, I think, as I stare at him menacingly.

He takes the glass of wine in his hand, and I just feel an evil adrenaline rushing through my veins, as the glass gets closer and closer to his face...touches his lips, and...he takes a drink. YES! ONE DRINK! THAT'S ALL I NEEDED! I can feel the joy running through my body, as I just stare at him with a , now, evil smile, as he keeps taking drinks from the glass. Even one single drop of that substance can kill you...so you better start saying goodbye to your sweet Jim...because he only has five months left to live. Maybe that way he'll finally learn that he shouldn't get in my way.


Amelie's POV

The girls leave at about 12 am, since there is work tomorrow. I can easily say that I had a great time tonight, especially since I feel like Jim and I are getting closer. And talking about Jim, I found it so nice that he stayed with me to help clean the kitchen, dishes, and living room, even though I insisted him like a billion times that he didn't have to clean.

"Alright," he starts, drying his hands. "It's done. Your house is impeccable."

I smile, and look down at the ground. "Jim, thank you so much. You didn't have to."

He smiles, as he approaches me. "Come on," he says. "Lets talk in the living room for a while."

For some reason, I can sense that Jim is a little sad...even since we were on the supermarket. I really don't know why, but I just feel like he is, and I didn't sense him like his when we were talking on Starbucks earlier today. I just wonder what might be happening to him.

"Amelie...I just want to thank you from the bottom of my heart for today," he says, as we arrive at the living room.

"Ohhh..." I start, a little surprised at his words. "Jim, please...it is my pleasure."

He smiles at me a little weakly, and that's when I sense his sorrow once again. I sort of want to ask him what's wrong...but at the same time, I just feel like he wouldn't be able to explain it...because I feel a little bit sad and confused about my feelings for him...and I'm not able to explain them either, so I can understand what it is to not be able to explain yourself.

"Is this a picture of your wedding?" he asks, as he takes a look at a frame resting on one of the living room's furniture.

I approach him to stand by his side, and look at the picture, too. "It is," I say, as we don't take our eyes off it.

From the corner of my eye, I can see Jim looks down at the ground, and lets out a silent breath of air.

"You look so happy," he says, bringing his head up.

I smile frailly, and drop my head. "I was," I start, turning my eyes to him. "But I don't remember."

Jim and I fix our eyes in one another's, and I start feeling the same way I felt in the supermarket earlier today...all of those questions that ran inside my head; that warmth and that love inside me...even though I know it's wrong and I should stop it. The real problem here is that I don't want to.

We keep staring at each other, until the magic is interrupted by the opening of the bathroom door, and Colin walks out, both of us turning to him.

"Ummm," starts Jim, looking down at his clock. "I guess...I should get going. Thank you again very very much."

"Ohh, Jim, please don't thank me. It's my pleasure. I'll join you to your car," I say, and start forward with him.

"It was nice meeting you, Colin."

"Same, Jim," I listen to him say, and I notice the tone happiness in his voice. For some very strange reason...Colin is extra happy tonight, and I just wonder what that reason might be.

I open the door, and Jim walks out, as I walk out behind him, leaving the door open only a few inches.

"Thank you so much for coming, Jim."

"Ohh thank YOU for inviting me," he says with a smile.

"Soooo...should I look forward on seeing you tomorrow?" I ask, a little scared of knowing the answer.

I can see that his smiles fades away a little, and the hidden expression of sadness is back. "I'm going back to LA tomorrow, Ams," he says, sounding down.

I feel my heart sinking inside my chest as he speaks these words, and for some reason...I feel like there are tears forming in my eyes.

"Oh," I say, trying to hide the way I'm feeling. "I-I hope you have a safe flight then."

Jim just stares at me for a few seconds, as I see his eyes getting shiny, too.

"Come here," he whispers, finally giving up. He pulls me, and wraps his arms around me in the gentlest, and most sincere way I've ever experienced. Just like earlier...the way he is hugging me is so familiar and so beautiful...I just feel like I've hugged him before. His arms are the only place I feel actually safe...and I don't really know what the reason for that is...but the same questions I was asking myself earlier are popping inside my mind again, and I can't help it...I've just never felt this way before...and I don't want him to leave, I seriously don't want him to leave.

"We will continue talking, okay?" he says with gentleness, and placing a small kiss on my cheek.

"Yes, of course."

"And remember you can't show that video to anyone."

I giggle at his words, as he was giggling, too. "Don't worry, I won't."

Jim smiles at me once more, and rubs my arm with his hand softly. "Please take care, Ams," he says turning around.

But as I see him walking away from me...I realize that I can't let him go...I can't let him go without clearing this inquire off my mind, and even though I'm hesitating on letting my voice out...I know that I must solve this before he leaves.

"Jim wait!" I shout, as he turns around, and I walk towards him.

He looks at me with a confused expression on his face, as he notices my nervous, anxious, and sad eyes. "What's up?" he asks, as he takes one step closer to me.

"I..." I start, but struggle to fully bring the words out of my mouth. "I just need to know something before you leave."

"Okay," starts Jim, still sounding a little confused, but paying all his attention to me. "What's that?"

"Y-you didn't finish what you were going to tell me on Starbucks."

"Ohhh, Amelie, but that isn't important."

"Well, you say it's not, but...you also said that that was the reason you came here, and you also said it involves me," I say, looking at him in the eyes, and begging for him to answer my questions.

"But then I was proven wrong. Everything I thought was nonsense...so I didn't continue talking about it."

"But...what was that that you thought about?" I am seriously hiding the amount of desperation I feel at the moment to know what was inside Jim's mind...only because I think it is really important to solve the way I'm feeling for him.

"Ams..." he says, then pausing for a moment. "It's really not important. It was a very stupid and silly thought, you might even think I am crazy. So go back to Colin, he must be waiting for you to sleep because you have work tomo—"

"Ok ok, alright..." I interrupt with gentleness. "If you don't want to tell me what you were going to tell me at Starbucks, then don't...but I do want you to answer one question before you leave.

"...alright," he says, paying all his attention on my words.

"I...I want to know if you're the blurry man I see inside my mind."

I can see that Jim throws me a very surprised look, that then turns to a saddened one, and drops his head to the ground, as a teardrop runs down his cheek, and his finger automatically moves to clean it.

"Amelie...I really don't know why you're asking me this, but...even though it hurts me so much to tell you...I'm sorry, but...I'm not."

And with this, Jim turns around, and continues walking forward, leaving me with tears in my eyes and sunken heart...but a sunken heart that just wishes the answer to the riddle that this feeling is...since it's a heart that is not only drowning...but has fallen in love as well.

"Though I really wish you were," I whisper, as I tear rolls down my cheek. 

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