"Alright fellas, we here today with Mia Turner at Canada's Wonderland. Let's hope I don't die."
"Are you holding a fake microphone?"
"Well, duh. How else am I supposed to get my fans to hear me from my show Dates With a Turner?"
"And why are you gonna die today? Is the mighty Hayden Williams scared of roller coasters?"
"No, you're scarier, to be honest."
"..."
"I'm kidding!"
"Glad to know that my boyfriend is scared of me."
"..."
"Why are you smiling so weirdly?"
"You called me your boyfriend."
"I did n- oh."
"My charms are finally working, aren't they?"
"Just get on the fucking ride, Williams."
"Of course, my lovely girlfriend whom I love so much! I would do anything for you!"
"Shut the fuck up."
"Okay, honey."
[when pigs fly]