Before I can live with other folks I've got to live with myself. The one thing that doesn't abide by majority rule is a person's conscience.― Harper Lee
Chapter 32 - Missing You
Addy's POV:
Joel patiently sits in the passenger seat, allowing me to drive for the first time on the interstate to my parents' house. Every once in a while I see him hit the imaginary break, when he thinks I'm gaining on someone too fast, but he doesn't say a word. There are no beads of sweat on his forehead or increased respiration. So far, so good.
I have six weeks until my wedding and absolutely no dress for the bride. All of the contenders have been booted off the island when Joel saw them. He kept saying, "It's too bad you can't take bits and pieces of your favorite dresses and make the perfect one." Well, I could if I had six months before the wedding. I barely have time to get one altered for me, at this stage.
"Am I going to be ok to drive to Memphis? Or are you going to do it?" I ask.
"How do you feel? You're doing fine. If you feel confident, then you should drive. Memphis isn't scary, it's just another town."
Aunt Rita's car is in the driveway when I pull in. "Rita's going with us?" Joel asks.
"I guess so."
Mom and Linda are sitting in the living room with Aunt Rita and Nana, none of which look in a hurry to leave. Deep breath...again. I haven't been a nervous bride thus far, but not having a dress is causing me more stress than I can afford while school is in session.
"What's going on?" I ask, hoping that I don't sound too bitchy.
My mom scoots over to give me a place to sit. "We have time. It'll take about two hours to drive to Memphis, and our appointment isn't until 1:00. Plenty of time." My mom has a very soothing voice, and it's helping me calm down a little.
"Hi, Joel? How was the drive?"
"Good, Ms. Emily. She did a good job. I only saw my life flash before my eyes twice." He smiles while I make a face at him.
Joel helps my aunt get a couple of large boxes out of her car. "Just put it in the guest room. That will be fine."
"Addyson, Emily tells me you have been having trouble finding a dress." I nod at Nana. "We wanted to show you this before you drive up to Memphis." I follow as she walks to the guest room, leaving Joel in the company of my dad and younger brothers. There are six large boxes on the floor and the bed.
Aunt Rita reaches for the largest box, slides off the top, and pulls back the tissue paper. "This was Sydney's dress when she married Jacob." Rita holds up a very traditional satin and lace dress with large puffy sleeves that is very reminiscent of the mid to late 80s, when my biological mom got married.
"It's pretty." I tell her with tears stinging my eyes. The style is nothing like I want for my wedding dress, but it is very pretty. It is full of iridescent sequins and lace with long tapered poofy sleeves and a high neckline. She turns it so I can see the back, with its satin covered buttons down the back and very long train with lace and sequins. It was my mom's wedding dress. I couldn't help but touch it and imagine what she looked like in it.
"Ok? Here's another." Linda says, opening another box as Rita lays the dress back in the box with the help of my mom and Nana. "This was mine. It's early 80s at its finest," she laughs as she pulls out her satin dress with puffy sleeves any pirate would envy. It was full of lace and sequins and beads and ribbons. Scarlet O'Hara would be proud. "Just be glad I didn't bring the hoop skirt that was worn with it." It really was pretty, but I understand why Linda was laughing - nostagia.
"This is the dress I wore when I married Patrick," my mom says, and I see a hint of sadness in her eyes. "I also got married in the 80s, but mine is very different." She pulls out a white satin dress with an open-lace overlay neckline and a long train. It is long sleeved but not puffy. It's beautiful and understated like the bride that wore it.
"I also brought out my dress from when I married your dad." In another box was the tea length strapless dress with the white lace bolero jacket that she had worn. I remember she looked like a princess when Mason and Papa walked her down the isle. Again, it is understated elegance, like my mom.
"Why are you doing this?"
"Honey, we've all been there. We know this is a hard decision, and we just want you to see that it all works out." My mom pulls me closer to her as we watch Nana pull her dress out of a box.
"I got married in the late 50's," she says holding up a dress that looks like it could have had a poodle on it once upon a lifetime, but then I take a closer look. It's a white taffeta dress with a short, cap-sleeve jacket, tight waist and full skirt. When she held it to her body, you could see it only went to mid-calf. She said she wore three peticoats to help make the skirt look fuller.
"You know dear. I never did get married, but I have your grandmother's dress from when she married my brother. She looked so beautiful." Aunt Rita pulls out my grandmother's dress from the early 1960s. It is a full-length silk baroque gown with a dropped waist and a short chapel length train. If it weren't for the sleeveless sheer underlay on the bodice, it would be strapless. There's just a touch of lace on the bodice and the hem, and just a little around the neckline and from a distance the lace looks like a necklace.
My eyes sting and I can feel the tell-tell signs that I'm about to cry, looking at each of these ladies with their wedding dresses placed around the room. There are three generations bonding over the same experience...a wedding. My mother must have sensed it too, because she hands me a tissue.
"You know, you're built a lot like Celeste." Aunt Rita says, looking fondly from me to my grandmother's dress. "She was a shapely woman, also. Got the attention of lots of fellows. Why don't you try her dress on? It could give you a focus for what to shop for later."
I hold the dress up to me, admiring it in the mirror. "Celeste and your Great-Grandma Mary spent weeks hand stitching the beads onto the lace." I moved the dress a little, and the pearl and glass seed-beads catch the light giving off a faint hint of shimmer. "The way your eyes look at this dress...I can't wait to see it on you."
"I don't think it will fit..." it looks small through the hips, but I hope it fits. I love this dress.
"Try it on. It will at least give you an idea if you like the bodice, and maybe you can find one like it."
My mom helps me, while the rest of the ladies retreat to the living room, waiting for a peek. "Honestly Addy, I think this dress may be a little big for you," she says as she begins to hook the iridescent glass buttons. "But you should be able to get a good idea. It's really a beautiful dress."
My mother hands me a pair of heels just so I wouldn't trip on the hem as I walk to the living room. My eyes are on my Nana and Aunt Rita, they're smiling and approving, until I heard a gasp. My dad's eyes glisten with tears as he says, "Oh, Addy, you make a very beautiful bride." I watch him physically let out a breath trying to contain his emotions. I had not even seen him enter the room.
I've never felt so beautiful, in my life as I do in this dress. It feels like it's made for me. "Can I wear this dress?" I ask directing the question to Aunt Rita and my mom and dad each of whom nodded. Joel looks extremely happy, and I even get approval from Nana and Linda.
"It looks like I'll be canceling an appointment with the boutique and making one with a seamstress instead." My mom says with the biggest smile on her face. I look down at my dress. It needs to be taken in a little at the waist and with the reattachment of petticoats it probably won't need to be shortened. It's perfect. Just perfect.
---
"So, how are you getting along without Edward these last few weeks?" Linda asks, after I change back into my clothes.
"He said to think of it as just a few days, so that's what I've been doing." Remembering just before Christmas, Edward let me know he would have to work in the smaller New York office at the end of January. There are a lot of changes with Dean Mathison retiring this year. His oldest son is moving back to Little Rock, Wyatt is moving to Chicago (taking Keri the bimbette with him), and the middle brother, Ethan, is leaving Chicago for New York.
Edward is just helping Dean Jr., Jack as they call him, by taking over some of the accounts and bringing them to Little Rock while Jack steps into his father's footsteps. It's been a hard few weeks for both of us, but we are stronger for it. It's been our reminder that we can survive, but we need each other to live.
"It's never easy when you're separated from someone you love, even if it's for a few weeks."
"No, it isn't." I say. Again, my mother's eyes show a quick flash of sadness that disappears when my dad's hand touches hers. Her first husband was in the military like Garrett was, I'm sure she was separated from him many times in her marriage, before he passed away.
"But he'll be home next weekend." She says with a smile, as Joel hands me my jacket.
------
Over the last few weeks, I've been busy checking off my list. I've gotten my driver's license, gone to a frat party, took a road trip to nowhere, along with a few other things. All of which I've done with Edward...sort of. He's been here with me in spirit, happy for my accomplishment, proud that I'm trying.
I have four things left on my list. Today, I'm checking off two, and I'm going to have two very mad roommates and an upset fiancé when I'm finished, but this has to be done.
I'm skipping class for the first time in my whole entire life. I've planned the ultimate Take Back my Life adventure. I've added an extra day to an already long weekend, and last night, I packed while Joel and Helen were out. I figure I could hide the bag in Edward's car overnight, and leave this morning before they woke up for class.
---
"Good Morning, Cariad. What do I owe the pleasure of a morning phone call?" Edward asks in his low sexy voice.
"Just needing to hear your voice." I tell him, imagining his smile. "Do you really think you'll be finished today?" He shocked me yesterday, telling me he was coming home early. It changes my plans slightly, but it won't stop me.
"Yes, probably couple of hours or so. I'm already packed, and I'll catch the 2:15 flight out of here." He sounds so excited to be going home, and I really can't wait to get to see him again.
"Is there a way you could, umm, not come home today?" I could hear the tension on the phone and then he chuckles.
"Why? Is there something you don't want me to see? Do you have a surprise for me?"
"No and yes." I tell him with a laugh. "Why don't you meet me in Boston?" There is silence on the other end of the line. For a moment I think he may have hung up, but then I hear a growling sound.
"Addyson?" He needs to know where I'm going before Joel and Helen decide to call him. I left them a note not specifying where I'm going, but knowing Joel he'll call Edward to check on me.
"I'm on my way to Boston right now. They'll be calling my flight in a few minutes. I meet with Detective Callahan at 1:30, but I'm free after that." I speak fast hoping to finish what I need to say before he interrupts, but I wasn't fast enough.
"Who's with you?" He asks, and I can hear him moving. He's agitated. I don't blame him, but he needs to stay calm and finish his job.
"No one." And no one knows I'm doing this except for Saada and Niam. Everyone else would try to talk me out of this, but I know I'm strong enough to go. I have to be.
"Don't get on the flight. I don't want you traveling alone."
"Edward, I have to. I'm already at the airport. I've had a small layover in Dallas, but I should be in Boston in about four hours."
"Had a small layover? Where are you?"
"Dallas." I take a deep breath. "Don't be mad. Niam's meeting me at the airport and going with me to the police station. He has more letters that have been sent to him since Thanksgiving. I'm making a statement, and trying to get Connor's privileges revoked or at least have him investigated. Some how he's getting letters out without a going through prison mail check."
"I know but..."
"When I'm finished, I would like to go rest some demons, and I would like to show you around my old town." I keep my voice calm so he can hear that I'm ok. I assure him that I'm not going to the prison upstate to see Connor. I don't need to give him that pleasure. I need to stop him.
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Wedding dress found...
Please don't forget to vote/comment.
What do you think Addy is going to do in Boston?
How mad do you think Edward will be with her, cause we already know Joel is going to be pissed?