Thank god. Justin's body guards were life savers. Justin decided to call them to get the girls out of our way and also to pick his car up and drive it home for him since he was riding with me.
I threatened to call the police on the fans, but Justin told me not to since they were his fans and they would most likely target him as the one who did it and then paparazzi would turn that into a bad story and throw more shit on top of Justin's reputation.
Makes sense.
I follow behind Justin's car and notice Justin still hasn't said one word since we left the scene. I began to grow worried about him. His eyes were fixed on the window and he was completely still.
"Justin? You alright?" I ask multitasking my vision on the road and to Justin's side view.
It took him a minute to respond.
"Yeah, I'm just tired." He said letting out a sigh.
"Tired as in sleepy or... Tired as in tired of fame?"
Justin craned his neck towards me and gazed his brown pools into mine.
"Both." He said emotionless, just like he sounded when he rejected me today.
I noticed his tone of voice and tried to get what was bothering out of him.
"Listen, I don't know you that well Justin, but if something is bothering you... You could tell me. I would never say a thing about it to anyone." I explain as I keep my focus on the road.
"I've heard that plenty of times and I always get stabbed in the back. Trust... Is hard to gain these days." His voice was low and I could tell this talk wasn't really helping him.
"You've got to let yourself fall so you can fly... I've been stabbed in the back plenty of times, but... You gotta learn to trust in yourself before trusting others. That's what I keep telling myself." I was hoping that would get him out of his shell that he was in.
"It's just... My fans... They don't understand what I go through or how I feel. It's like all they care about is getting pictures of me or with me so they can show it off on social media and get likes for it... I feel used and like I don't matter to them. I feel like a zoo animal and I'm trapped in the fucking zoo with wild monkeys attacking me every which way I turn. It's not the best feeling at all and you wouldn't understand because... You aren't me. I want to have that connection with my fans, but lately... They have drained me dry and I can't do it anymore. You heard what that one girl said. She said "I bought your album so it's at least you could do." That's the shit I put up with daily and it's like they think I owe them something when I don't owe them shit. It's an ALBUM, when you buy it, it doesn't say in the fine print that you get a picture with 'Justin Bieber'. It's fucking ridiculous." After all that being said, Justin rubbed his chin curling in his bottom lip. It's like he has been waiting to get that out for the longest time and he didn't have the right person to tell it to.
I don't know what it's like to be him, but I completely understand where he is coming from.
"You're only human Justin, you don't need to put anyone before your happiness. Those girls out there are not your fans... They are thirsty attention seekers who just want a picture to show everyone and say "I met him." Your beliebers would never in a million years tear you down like they just did. Hell, now I know why you cancelled your meet and greets. I don't blame you, but you're missing something very important." I say pausing for a moment.
Justin stared at the side of my face and said "and what is it?"
I heave a sigh. Here I go...
"You punish your real fans... Your beliebers, by pushing them out because you think they are like the rest of the girls who just want a picture. You don't realize you're hurting them, but in reality you are. Your fans love you for you and they understand that you are only human and you can only take so much. They just want to connect, but most of the fake fans ruin it for them. It's hard being you, I get it, but the people who supported you since day one are closer than you think and will always support you no matter what."
Damn, that was deep.
Justin chewed on his bottom lip as he took all of what I said in.
"You're right. I do push them away, but only because I just want to be alone and when I am alone and away from my life as a pop singer, I feel happy and I feel like I can be myself like I am right now... When I am away from fame or the cameras and all the screaming... I feel normal but only for just a second because something always brings me back down to reality."
I could feel my eyes watering because I felt so bad for him. He was so sensitive and real about everything with me, and people take that for granted and use him for who he is.
"It's hard to face reality J... It's never going to be easy, but you know what? God is there with you every step of the way and he blessed you with your talent and big heart for a reason. You're such a good person. Don't let anyone make you feel other wise."
I wrap it up since we were pulling into Justin's driveway. His house towered over me as I look up admiring it's beauty.
I put the car in park and give Justin a slight smile.
"Thanks for the ride Christina." Hearing his voice say my name sounded so sweet.
"Anytime." Justin unbuckled his seat belt and got out of the car. Before he shut the door he stood in the door way looking down at me.
"Wanna come inside?" Justin asked politely. I raise a brow and forgot that he was talking to me.
"Oh uh... Well I can for just a minute." It was late, but I wasn't going to turn that opportunity down. No no.
I follow behind Justin as his feet dragged the ground. He unlocked the door and pushed it open finding Esther running to his feet.
"Esther! Did you shit on the floor again, If you did daddy is going to be mad." Justin said in a playful tone as if she understood what he was saying.
I held back my inner fangirl and pet Esther as she jumped on my leg.
"Hey cutie." I say as I bend down looking at her. She was the cutest thing ever.
"You can have a seat in there, I'll be right back." Justin said as he stripped his shirt off carelessly.
My eyes held on his body and I tried to not stare too hard, but holy shit... His body is so much hotter in person. Damn. Okay Christina get it together. No touchy.
"Nooo, Esther you shit in my closet!" Justin said loudly. He had the poop in a towel and chunked it in the garbage. I could tell it wasn't the first time she did that.
I sat on his expensive couch and admired the painting on the wall. Esther joined me and licked my face to get my attention.
"Okay come to daddy." Justin said as he snuck up from behind me.
For a minute I thought he was talking to me, but of course... He was talking to Esther. Fuck, I'm glad I didn't open my big mouth, because there is no telling what would have came out of it.
Justin joined me on the couch. He was still shirtless, but he had a pair of sweats over his calvins. I started to think he did that on purpose since he seen me stare at him as he took his shirt off. No! Christina do not fall for it. Do not give into your dirty little mind.
I admired his tattoos, and held my cool.
"So, this is where you live?" I ask to distract myself from his beauty.
"Yeah, but this is just one of my houses. I have many." Justin explained simply as he pet Esther.
"It's really nice." I respond giving him a smile.
"Thanks... Would you like a drink since I kinda took you away from your beer?"
What is he up to. Hmmm.
"No, it's okay. I have to drive home and also I have work in the morning so I shouldn't." Justin nodded his head understandingly and grabbed him a drink even though I wasn't joining him.
"You know... You could crash here for the night, I wouldn't mind. It's just me and Esther and you did me a favor so..." Justin said as he sipped on his beer.
Did he just offer me to fucking sleep in his house? Holy shit I'm not okay. Okay okay, I have to keep calm.
"Well, as nice as that sounds I'll have to think about it." I say with a smile.
I don't even know how I'm alive right now.
"Consider it." Justin said turning on the humongous flat screen that hung over us.
"Hmm, If I do stay you have to promise you won't peak when I'm getting undressed since you like to play too much." Why did I just say that.
"I can't make any promises." Justin replied with a flirty smile curved on his lips.
What the fuck did he just say? Let me die right now oh my...
"I'm just fucking with you." He added as he noticed I was silent. I didn't mind it, but in all reality I was thinking of his ass naked the whole time I wasn't speaking. Oops.
"I know you were. You sure do like to tease don't you?" I scoot closer to him and got comfortable.
"Nah, I just like to mess with people because I love their reactions. It's quite funny." That little shit...
"Oh and my reaction was?" I ask raising an eyebrow.
He mimicked my face expression and I died laughing.
"No, you're such a liar." Actually I believe him. I'm such an awkward person.
"It was cute." He said finishing the beer that he just opened. Damn... That boy is gonna have kidney problems. Wait, he just said it was cute... Can he not.
My face tinged red at his words and I tried to hide it, but obviously it wasn't working.
"So are you gonna crash here or what? I'm about to get some sleep so... If you do end up staying, just turn all the lights off and you can sleep in any bedroom or you can just crawl into the bed with me and Esther. It doesn't make a shit to me." He responded while he scratched his lower stomach.
"I guess you'll find out. Get some sleep alright." I said still sitting on the couch.
Justin nods and makes his way into the bedroom and cracks his door. I look around the room and decide to explore the rest of the house that I haven't seen yet. I'm pretty sure he wouldn't mind.
I go up the stairs quietly and turn the light on to the walk way. The hall way was huge and I could literally swing on the fucking chandelier if I wanted. It was so tempting.
There were so many rooms, but I don't know what for. I mean he lived alone for the most part.
I decided to turn back so I wouldn't get lost in his big house. I'll just have him give me a tour tomorrow or something. Who knows.
I make my way down the stairs and turn all the lights off like he told me to. I took on his offer to sleep in his bed, only because I didn't know how I felt about sleeping in a gigantic bed alone.
I slowly open the door to his room and find him sound asleep with Esther in his arms. If that's not the cutest thing I have ever seen in my life then I don't know what is.
I didn't really have anything to sleep in so I just laid down in what I had on. I move the covers back slowly trying not to wake the little sleeping beauty beside me, but knowing me... I'm bad at being quiet. Justin wakes up and sees me crawling into bed.
"Do you need a shirt?" He asks in a raspy tone.
I nod my head and follow behind him into one of his closets.
Yeah... He has more than one closet... Figures.
"Is this alright?" He asked holding up a long plain white T- shirt.
"Yeah that's perfect thank you."
Justin crawls back into bed and turns on his side.
I didn't really know where his bathroom was and I didn't really feel like finding it so... I made sure Justin wasn't looking and stripped off my clothes and threw on his shirt that swallowed me whole.
Damn, this is like a fucking dress.
As I threw my clothes to the side, I crawl into bed comfortably and lay on my side not knowing how I could have possibly went from a girl who was Justin's fan to a girl who sleeps in his t-shirts and bed.
This was blowing my fucking mind. For a second I thought I was dreaming, but I already pinched myself so I know I'm not...
I told you I was awkward.
Justin snores so fucking loud I just want to take a fucking pillow and hit him with it so he will wake up.
Nah... I'll let him sleep. I'll give him hell tomorrow when I get up for work.
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