Gif of Victor as Douglas Booth. He will finally make an appearance in this chapter! :')
Warning longest chapter in this book.
~~//~~//~~//~~
After the incident with Abby the first person to run up to her was Rob he even beat Conor. We made sure she is safe but she kept insisting she's fine waving us off for being dramatic. The first thing she said to us is she needed a drink which made us chuckle relief that she still has her sense of humor. It takes a lot more to break Abby.
I hugged her for the longest time, all my fear vanished making me breathe easier.
We called Tyler straight after that and told him about everything that has happened. The werewolves that had suffered changed back into their human form and when they did. I saw the true impact of the torture and violence that happened to them.
Most of them is covered burns and deep cuts but the worst ones had broken many ribs that they couldn't move from the floor. There is about twenty of them and most of them are young and I can't hide the emotions I feel about this.
The sadness I feel for them is clear on my face. As if Tate felt if too he grab hold of me and hugged me tightly. His simple touch had my heart calm making me lean against him tiredly not realizing how much I needed that until he touched me.
I didn't understand it though, I didn't understand why they weren't healing. When Tyler saw what had happened his face paled as I explained everything. He didn't say much that night but I see despair and regret in his face. The responsibility of being an Alpha of this pack is causing him guilt to see his people hurt and not knowing a single about this.
Two days had passed and Abby has been doing perfectly well because Conor bought her creme glazed donuts to keep her happy.
It's Monday morning when Mr Wells rang his obnoxious loud bell in my room at 5:30 in the morning. I literally rolled out off the bed with the bed sheets tangled against me.
"Wake up sunshine." Mr Wells greet happily.
"I'm going to kill you" I groan curling myself into a ball wishing he would go away.
"Get up now or I will make read 100 pages of the history of witches." He threatened.
"You can't do that" I whined poking my head out the covers seeing the darkness of my room.
I glared up at Mr Wells who wore a grey sweater with dark jeans pairing it with his old boots.
"You want to test me and find out?" His eyes gleam with mischievousness making me think he likes to see me suffer "You have 10 minutes to get ready..starting now!"
With that I got up finally ignoring the heavy way my eyelids demands to be close. Once I was done I met him in the backyard where he hand me a cup of coffee and peach pastry making me almost forgive him for waking me up. Almost.
"Why do we have to get up so early anyway?" I rolled my eyes at him.
"Because dear Kylie you need to learn quick and fast about everything since you will make an announcement to all werewolves that you are alive this week and you will need to decide on what you want to do." Mr Wells press his lips in a tight line.
I frown deeply knowing my time is shortened but the fact that I need to make a final decision if I want anything to do with this is dawning on me. I can't just say I'm too young and I don't want the responsibility of protecting werewolves, werewolves that are human. I have no skills, not enough knowledge to pull it off.
Most of all I'm scared.
"We will understand if you want to back out of this Kylie, you are young and we won't hold it against you if you want to walk away from this." Mr Wells spoke softly.
"Did my mother walk away? Did her mother walk away? And her mother before her? I will not walk away, I will not be the first Evanguard to turn their back on something we are born to do. Females in my family are born to become great leaders and I know I have a lot to learn but I just hope one day I can make them proud."
A smile makes it's way onto his face, like the smile he gave me when I showed him my chosen element.
"I think you already have Kylie" He smiled softly "You didn't grow up as a witch like them but yet you are handling yourself better then anybody. Anyone would have run for over the hills when they found out about werewolves but not you and at that time you didn't even know about your true identity."
"I guess that makes me insane right?" I joked making him chuckle.
"No, that makes you an Evanguard you will never turn your back on werewolves ever"
I smiled at that, for the past few days spending with Mr Wells we built a strong bond between us. He's my mentor and I will be forever grateful for him.
After our breakfast we found ourselves in a hospital ward where the wounded werewolves were taken. It was good to know that the chef surgeon in this hospital is a werewolf putting me at ease.
"What are we doing here?" I frowned.
We stood infront of the injured werewolves that can't heal themselves so they are relying on medicine to improve their health.
"Do you know why some werewolves can't heal themselves after an accident?"
"No, why?"
I look over at them and frowned at the young faces lying in that hospital beds.
"It's not just the physical wounds they have to heal it's mentally and that's the bit that takes the hardest time to heal. In some trauma cases like this they are reliving the torture that has been done to them over and over preventing them to heal themselves." Mr Wells open the door allowing me to enter.
The nurses saw us and greeted us in familiarity with Mr Wells and left us alone with the patients. We walk closer to one girl who is in a coma, her wrists are broken and have a major brain injury.
"She's only 16 years old and she was the worst of them all her name is Stella."
Her face seem so innocent with button nose and freckles along her cheeks and nose.
"That's where you can help them Kylie" Mr Wells face me.
"How?" I look at him oblivious.
"What is remarkable about your family is you can help werewolves get through any sadness in their lives and you help them cope by being in that traumatic memory with them. You see a glimpse of their memory and you carry that sadness for them and what you feel in that moment is not sadness or pain but a new form of connection with each individual werewolf. You don't erase their pain you help them get through it."
He smiled in awe of what my family is capable of and I am too in adoration of this ability to heal someone like that.
"Is it only werewolves I can help?"
"I'm not really sure if you can do that with humans, it's never been done before." Mr Wells shrugged. "Place your hand on top of her"
I did as told placing it above her hands looking at him for more instructions.
"Close your eyes"
I closed my eyes.
"Now relax and let your mind wander it will come to you-
"How?"
"It's like being pulled into a dream, it takes no effort for you at all but it means a great deal to them."
I did as he told me to do and relax allowing myself to get lost in my own head. Just when I thought nothing is going to happen the blankness of my mind is pulled into a new environment. It's dark and cold and in a small steel room. Then I saw her on the table strapped helpless, her head is held down tightly with a weird spikey looking device inches away from her eyes which is typed wide open not allowing her to shut her eyes.
I can feel the fear radiating from her and I can see the tears rolling down the side of face. The pain she endures is holding her back because of the darkness of the past won't let her go.
I quickly walk up to the table taking off the straps and removing the device and tape around her eyes.
"Stella?" I spoke trying to get her attention but seemed out of it.
"He's coming" She mumbled disoriented. "He's coming, hide, he's coming!" Her voice becomes louder and louder. "Don't let him hurt me..I can't do it anymore please" She sobs brokenly.
"I won't let him hurt you Stella." I took hold of her hand to make her look at me my heart breaking for her.
Blood stained her dry lips, her eyes bruised from the injections they are giving her. I lift her up to sit up swiping her hair off her face.
"I'm here no one is going to hurt you now. You're safe"
"It hurts so much" She cries.
I held her face delicately and wipe away her tears vowing to protect every werewolf.
"I know it does but you know what Stella the people who endures such horrifying things to them will not only get through life, no, you will thrive. As hard as it is now you will not carry the pain anymore because you are stronger and you are capable of getting back up and each time you are face with people that wants to break you down keep your head held high because no one can tare you down."
I smiled at her stepping back and held my hand towards her to grab. She stops crying and she stops shaking with fear.
"Now you get up from that table will you I'm sure the people that cares about you is worried sick." I smiled widely.
She took hold of my hand her whole face lighting up in excitement.
"Mom and dad with you?"
"They are" I whispered throwing my arms over her shoulder.
The dark place turned into a blinding light and I feel myself pulling away from the memory like waking up from a dream.
I open my eyes a sense of relief wash over me as I watch Stella's face slowly change her eyes slowly opening. A big smile form in my face as her eyes fall onto me a sense of recognition shown in her expression.
We called in the nurse and her parents and not even a few hours went by her condition drastically change which made me really happy. I did feel a new sort of connection just like Mr Wells said and he never looked so proud.
We went one by one helping each of them with their inner battles and every time I felt good about myself. How can you not? When you see the pain that was once there in their eyes fade away and they would look at me with such appreciation it had my chest tighten at the sight.
I was just glad I could help.
~~//~~//~~//~~
It was midnight when I toss my blanket off me and swing myself off the bed mindlessly walking towards his bed. Slowly I peek through his dark bedroom finding him fast asleep, my heart launch in my throat seeing the peacefulness on his face. His face is half buried against his pillow, lying on his stomach with his bare back exposed.
I miss him and I can't wait until morning to be with him.
So I did the most brave thing I could have ever done I walked closer to his bed when I closed his door quietly. Coming closer had my heart pounding so loud, my nerves getting the best of me and before I could retreat and runaway from embarrassment. He moved his position, lifting his head to place it on the other side which means his face is towards me. When he moved he opened his eyes slightly catching me standing there looking like a creep.
"Kylie?" He spoke huskily rubbing his eyes as if he can't believe that I'm standing here and quiet frankly me too.
Why does he have to be so damn attractive all the time?
"Hi" My face heated up and I am thankful for the darkness.
He lift himself up on his elbow confused staring at me sleepily. He can see my nervousness and rather teasing me he lift the blanket up for me to climb on.
Relief wash over me and quickly I climb inside his warm bed laying down on the edge of it.
"What are you doing all the way there?" He smirk in amusement.
Before I could answer he wraps his arms around my waist and pulled me against him. The scent of his body wash and shampoo is strong against the pillows making me sigh in comfort. I face him and wrap my own arms around him feeling his warmth.
I didn't realize how much I really did miss him all day. I didn't see him at dinner because he had something to do apparently.
"Where were you tonight?" I mumbled against his neck.
"I've been setting traps around the boarder of this town and new cameras. Dad has been putting more responsibilities on me since I will be an Alpha to this pack soon."
I pulled back and look over his tired features, I sigh and ran my hands through his scalp tugging at his hair slightly making him close his eyes moaning at the massage I'm giving him.
"Well I had a good day" I smiled widely.
"Yeah?" He opens his eyes smiling at the sight of my own smile pulling me closer to him that our legs tangled each other.
"I learn how to help werewolves get through their mental state of pain. I swear uncle Rob was in tears when I told him tonight" I chuckled at the memory his face looked priceless like I took first step but he missed it so he was sad.
"Really?" He grinned making me nod in return "I'm so proud of you" He leaned down and kiss me softly.
Even though it was just a quick kiss I was still not use to his touch and I don't think I will. I think my heart will always jump from his touch.
"I missed you today" I continue my massage on his head knowing that he needs it.
"I missed you too" He mumbled "You know I'm still a little mad with the stunt you pulled the other day with all those werewolves."
"What do you mean?" I frowned.
"I am meant to protect you, it's in my nature to put your life before mine no matter what. The fact that you told me to stay back physically hurt me but you told me to so I listened but I don't think I can do that anymore."
I didn't realize how much it affected him, all these things are new to me and to him too. I'm sure he doesn't like being told what to do and actually following it.
"I don't want you to" I blurt out.
"What?" His eyebrows came in confusion.
"I don't want you to put your life before mine because you're important too-
"No you're important, you're an Evanguard and I can't let you get hurt." He interrupts me shaking his head at me.
"You're important to me" I whispered softly finishing my sentence.
His eyes softened caressing my cheek with his fingers and some understanding final shows in his eyes.
Maybe I need to show him how important he really is to me, how much it scares me to know he is willing to sacrifice everything to save me when the thought of him hurting because of me pains me so much.
I slam my lips against his taking him by surprise by the passion and hunger in the kiss. My teeth tugged on his lower lip making him take a sharp breath moaning into our kiss. Our lips moved perfectly against each other, his tongue darting to touch mine deepening the kiss. The same heated lust erupt within us and we want it all and more is not enough.
His touch leaves a burning feeling in my core and his lips is like a hydrating water giving me some relief.
I groan feeling him pressing against me completely taking over the kiss. His hands grips my waist as he settle his hips between my legs. I did a bold move and wrap my legs around his waist causing a friction between us. Feeling his hard length turning harder between our thin clothes.
He pulled away moaning against my neck, gripping my hips to stay still both of us breathing heavily.
"I think we should stop" His voice strain.
"Why?" I breathe.
"Your first time should be-
"Who said this is my first time?" I frown.
He pulls back taking a look at my face shock clear on his face.
"I still remember what you said to me when it was my first day in the cafeteria" I look at him annoyed and slightly hurt.
I am referring to the way he teased me with Trevor about how much of a 'virgin Mary' I look and that I look like I've never been touch by a boy before.
Thinking of that day made my stomach twist pain and my chest tighten pushing him off me.
"Is that what you really think of me?" I look at him angrily but most of all hurt that he could say things like that. "Do you really think no other guys would want to touch me or have sex with me is that it?" I raised my voice inching away from him.
"Kylie that's not what I meant" His eyes widen shaking his head rapidly.
"You said that to me I remember because I remember feeling embarrassed and hurt. I guess you just don't care and you forgot all about it. " I push the blankets away to get up from the bed.
"Where are you going?" He grumbled standing up.
I didn't answer him and walked towards the door and I think he didn't like me walking away cause within seconds I feel his hand grip my wrist spinning me around.
"I know I said that and I didn't mean it, I was just being an asshole." He looks at me pleadingly. "I knew the moment I said those things it hurt you and I regretted it and I'm sorry" He whispered a frown making it's way onto his lips.
Taking hold of my face to force me look at him.
"You do believe me don't you? When I say I want you, every inch of you and it drives me crazy when I picture you beneath me. When I hear you moan is like the best sound I have ever heard." He whispered my body tensing from his words. "Do you believe me when I say you attract most boys here and it makes me mad when I know they think they have a chance with you. So believe me when I say you're the most beautiful girl that ever walked into my life and you are all I think about"
He annoyed me, he made me angry and hurt but all together he gave me passion and had my heart racing with each word. All too soon my anger vanished and replace by awe of this person.
I let my body relax leaning against him my arms wrapping around his waist letting him wrap his own around mine. He kiss my forehead letting his lips linger against my skin a little longer.
Does he realize how much I need him? I know I will always need him more then he needs me and it really does break my heart.
"Do you mean it?" I whispered wanting the fear of losing him already to fade away.
"I mean every word" He lift my chin to look up at him. "You don't how much I pictured me having my way with you." He moan leaning down on my neck to nip my skin teasingly making me chuckle.
"But I want our first time to be perfect" He looks at me closely.
"Who knew" I smiled lovingly tracing his lips with my finger.
"What?" He smiled.
"How sentimental you really are" I grinned.
He chuckled kissing my cheek and pulling me towards back to the bed pulling me down back to the covers. He pulls me against his arms, our legs tangled and our face inches apart. We stayed in this comfortable position feeling my eyelids starting to close, his fingers combing my hair until I fell asleep.
"So who was the guy?" He asked before I could really fall into a deep sleep?"
"Hmm?" I asked tiredly snuggling deeper into the crook of his neck.
"The first guy you slept with?" He asked I can hear the curiosity behind his question.
"It-
"Doesn't matter I don't want to know!" He said quickly making me laugh lightly.
I pulled back seeing his panic face adoring him more my eyes softening seeing his expression. This boy really is something.
"Oh really?" I teased. "Do you not want to know the details on how he got me in bed?" I wiggle my eyebrows making him pout in such a cute way.
"No, so shh get back to sleep." He said grumpily.
I held my laughter loving the fact I can get him jealous the way I easily get with him. I crane my neck and place a kiss on his neck tenderly making his arms tighten around my waist.
"His touch is nothing compared to what you do to me" I whispered honestly.
"Really?" I can feel his smirk making it's way on his face.
"Really."
With that we both fell asleep happily in each other's arms.
~~//~~//~~//~~
The sound of my phone ringing had me wincing knowing it's still dark outside. I bury my face closer to Tate's neck not wanting to deal with it. Just as the sound disappeared it came back just as quick making both of stir from our sleep.
"What the hell" I groan annoyed reaching for my phone.
I peek through my eyes seeing the blinding light of my phone making me cringe. Feeling Tate move around to see what's happening.
"Hello?" I answered half asleep.
"This is Cornell Medical Centre this is Jane the nurse keeping you updated for Mr Victor Hart." Her voice made me jolt from my sleeping position fully awake now.
Tate stir noticing my change of mood.
"Yes?" I whispered scared of what she is about to say.
"Mr Hart's condition has worsen, he is rejecting the medications and his body has started shutting down which means his organs are failing"
I gasp shakily unable to process anything but the pain in my chest I'm feeling. Tears rolling down my face.
"He is in a lot of pain and I'm afraid he only has a few days left. It's best for you to come down here as soon as possible Kylie." She spoke softly in sympathy "It's best to say goodbye to Mr Hart."
I didn't know what to say, all words is jumbled in my mind and I couldn't speak.
"Kylie are you there?" She spoke.
As if feeling my struggle Tate took hold of my phone seeing my shock state and speak to the phone himself. All noise is blocked from my ears and now all I could hear are my cries.
I cry for my best friend lying in hospital in pain all alone. I cry for the person that loved every bit of me unconditionally. I cry from the raging pain I feel inside knowing this is all unfair that he shouldn't have to die this way. I cry for Victor.
"Kylie baby come on." Tate cooed taking hold of my face my tears blocking my vision. "I hate seeing you like this." He spoke softly wiping my tears.
My heart is breaking already piece by piece and I know I won't be able to take it.
I hear Tate get up and out of the room to get some things while I try to calm myself down but the thought of turning off the machine that is keeping him alive breaks me apart and I can't hold on to him anymore.
I love him more then myself, I've always have and the thought of losing him is driving me insane already.
Tate came back with my clothes and I hear him in the distant telling me we will be driving to the airport. Time flew by and his words is nothing but whispers and we are seated in a plane to fly to where Victor is. I am thankful it's only three hours away because if it's longer then that I think my anxiety will go over the roof and I would have a panic attack.
I see Tate talk to my uncle about what is happening over the phone while I sat back with my eyes clothes picturing him.
Victor with his never ending stories about us two traveling the world and we would follow each other no matter what. With no money, with no true path of where to go but it's okay because as long as we have each other it's okay. We will always find a way, we will always make it through another day.
I blink away the tears feeling my cold tears run down my cheeks
He was suppose to make it.
I don't how we got here it's like I block every single thing and I know the moment I see him again it will be like reality smack on my face. Tate took hold of my hand as we stood in front of the reception.
"Hi we are here for Victor Hart" Tate said while my eyes cast down low.
"Excuse me did you just say Victor Hart?" A voice startle me.
I look behind my shoulder seeing a petite women with a small face and bob amber red hair cut. Her warm kind eyes looked over at me.
"You must be Kylie" She smiled softly "I'm Jane, come on I'll take you to him" She put her arm around my waist in comfort.
We now stood infront of his door and I dread every second of this and I can't bring myself to open it and she sees that. She place her warm hand on mine.
"I know it's hard but he needs you sweetie and I think you need him too." She said encouragingly.
I took a deep breath feeling myself shake nodding at her to open it. It opens revealing him laying there peacefully and to think he's in so much pain. I took in a shaky breath a little pain lift off me seeing him despite the situation I have missed him so much.
With quick steps all I want to do I envelop into a hug because all I want to feel is his familiar comforting touch.
His skin has a slight yellow tone to it telling me how sick he really is and I see him giving up the fight of holding on.
(Cue in the music I attached to this chapter for dramatic effect :') Listen to the song you won't regret it)
I grab hold of his hand sitting on the bed next to him lifting his hand to kiss it. His brown hair is shaggy but neatly comb away from his face. He has a slight stubble around his chin but yet he never looked handsome making realize how much of a beautiful person my best friend really is. The bruise around his neck is not there anymore.
"I'm here Victor" I sniff.
The reason why I left is because of the over whelming pain I feel and it's not just my own sadness weighing me down it's his too. My ability to allowing me access with his pain and it's stronger because I have a close bond with him.
It's like being trap in a small room and so slowly water starts to seep into this room and as time ticked by it's struggle to breathe. It's struggle to stay fighting trying to break this walls so I let the pain in, I let myself drown in the pain with him and Uncle Tedd saw that I'm breaking apart and the only way to save me to get me out of here.
Now that I'm back here the pain came back crashing into my very core and I can't handle it.
"I'm sorry I left you I'm here now. Please, Victor I need you" I plead quietly. "I miss you so much I know you miss me so wake up. You have to wake up" I beg him like he would magically stir awake.
"Kylie" Tate whispered his hand landing on my shoulder in sympathy but I don't want it.
"No" I shrug him off me. "He's going to be fine you'll see he won't leave me." I smiled sadly. "He has always been so stubborn but he always pulls through. So come on Vic wake up." I shook his slightly causing a slight change in his heartbeat which is not good.
"Kylie" Tate's voice sadden maybe because of how delusional I sound.
Poor sad girl right? Begging her friend to stay alive when it's inevitable. He's dying and there's no way he can survive this and everyone knows it.
I got up from the bed tears streaming down my cheeks kneeling down infront of his bed burying my face against his hands clenching onto him like he's already slipping away. The undeniable pain rush through me crushing every bit of my soul.
"Is this what you want Victor?" I cried holding onto him not wanting to say goodbye. I'm not ready. "I'm begging you please stay. Please you promised you will never leave me" I said selfishly.
I don't know how to say goodbye to him. To the person who was always there 24/7 and to know they will never be there anymore makes it harder for me to breath. How do you say goodbye to the person who saved you from taking your own life? How can you say goodbye when all you want is for him to tell me it's going to be okay.
He is a big part of me I won't let go.
I feel Tate lower himself next to me touching my arm making me lift my head seeing his deep frown set as he stare at me.
"I can't lose him" I whispered brokenly "There must be another way."
"I'm sorry Kylie" His face fell just like mine.
My mind think of any possibilities not medical wise but another sort of power, my power. That's when it clicked.
"I can take his pain away." I spoke in slight hope.
"What?" Tate's voice filled with confusion.
I stood up and face Tate hoping and praying this will work.
"I can take his mental pain away, I know it's crazy but it could work" The more I talk about it the more hope grows in me.
"Kylie that only works for werewolves" He spoke softly trying to let me down gently but I shook my head.
"You don't know that I know it hasn't been done to humans before but I can try. He has been sad for a very long time and if I give him hope, if I help him get through this pain maybe he will wake up." I'm starting to believe it.
The high hopes I have to save him might only break me apart even more but the thought of trying something like this gives me real hope. Tate sees that even though he has doubts or maybe he just doesn't want to see the outcome of what will happen to me when it fails.
"It's worth a try right?" I whispered.
Tate raise his hand to wipe my cold tears that is starting to dry against my tears. He smiled at me sadly and despite his doubts he pretends for me and I love him for it.
I do, I truly love him.
"Okay" He smiles encouragingly. "Just so you know Kylie I'll be here okay?" He spoke softly.
"I know" I find the strength to smile back.
So I sat on the chair next to the bed and place my hand over him and close my eyes relaxing into it letting my ability push through the surface. I let my mind connect with his, I let myself see the saddest part of his memory.
I just want him back. I need him back.
In this desperate hope, desperate last plead for him to stay alive is clinging onto me.
To my amazement the blackness of my mind is being pulled to his memory. I find myself in his house seeing him standing there looking so healthy and alive had my throat clenching in happiness. I was about to speak up and reveal myself but I see Sawyer walking in.
Sawyer the guy he is in love with, the guy that treats him like shit at school and pretends he doesn't care about him infront of his friend. Th guy I have to watch treat my best friend like shit because he is too much of a coward to admit he is gay. He is too ashamed and too gutless so instead he hurts Victor at school by avoiding him, by rejecting his affections but then beg for it later. He would see him secretly and Victor fell for him and he said he just can't stop.
I hate it, I hate Sawyer for doing this to him because I knew the moment I saw him hanging from that rope it was his fault.
I searched for him for so long after that but he was no where to be found and all I could do is cry out in anger and pain for Victor.
"So is that it?! Huh? I'm sick and tired of you acting like I am nothing to you with your brainless friends" Victor yells at Sawyer who is staring at him blankly. "You treat me like shit! And I have been patient and waiting for you to finally say to everyone that you love me but you won't will you?"
I see the broken look on Victor's face with his tears running down his face. Frustration and sadness building up but yet Sawyer stands there trying to look unaffected.
"You're not going to speak?" Anger clear in his voice. "Say something!" He moves towards him pushing him roughly. "I love you through everything and you just don't care" He cries brokenly with so much tiredness of fighting for this.
Sawyer breathe heavily his eyes turning glassy red, "I guess you're right" He laugh bitterly standing up to straighten his clothes. "I don't care. Did you really believe I could love someone like you?" He spat viciously "This was all just a game, a boring game I am getting sick of." He didn't stop there.
It was like he wants to hurt him on purpose, he is pushing him away to break his heart so he could walk away.
"You are nothing to me so stop being pathetic and begging for my attention. I will never love you and the thought of you love me really does disgust me." Sawyer grin coldly.
I can't erase the look on Victor's face as he hears this. I can see it break him, I can see behind his eyes the defeated pain crushing him.
"I told you didn't I? Countless of times how I will break you but you didn't listen did you? Now look what happen." He shook his head almost amused.
"You're lying" Victor close his eyes whispering in a shaky voice.
"What was that?" He chuckled mockingly.
"You love me I know you do." Victor walks towards him "After all we've been through I know your love is true" He looks at him almost pleading wanting him to take it all back. "Take it back"
He sounded so broken, hanging by a thin thread before going insane.
"Just take it back Sawyer, that's all." His voice shook in fear holding on with his tiny hope that Sawyer does love him.
I see the facade on Sawyer's face slowly drop and for a second hope flash in Victor's eyes but he made a mistake touching him because Sawyer pulled back and punch him right on the jaw causing him to stumble on the ground.
The shock look is clear on Victor's face as he looks up at Sawyer on the ground with a bleeding lip. Betrayal and pain twist his face and it breaks my heart. I see the darkness of his mind seeping through the cracks and I knew right at this moment is when he finally breaks.
"Get your hands off me faggot! We are nothing but just a fail experiment." He stood over Victor almost mockingly. "I don't love you and I never will so don't contact me because from now on you are nothing to me and you ever open your dirty little mouth to anyone about this you will pay." He shouts.
Slamming the door open he stormed out leaving him on the ground.
I ran infront of him as if trying to get him to see me and erase his pain from his memory.
"Victor I'm here" I whispered, I reach forward trying to grab his face but it went through him like a ghost.
The facade look of pure pain that makes me cry for him. I see the desperation of trying to get rid of it that it makes him mad. He ran pass me and I see him break the glass of the mirror and slice his wrist. I try to shout at him to stop, reach for him and hug him and tell him I love him he didn't hear me. He drop the glass and as if it wasn't killing him fast enough he went towards his closet and brought out a rope.
"Please!!! Victor no!" I was horrified seeing my best friend kill himself like this.
I see his heart breaking more and more, the sorrow embedded in his mind that can't run from it anymore.
I watch my best friend tie the rope and grab a chair and tie the rope around his neck. I collapse on the ground squeezing my eyes shut and press my hands over my ears as he jumped of the chair.
"Stop! Stop!" I cried.
The choking sound of Victor stopped and then the door open again revealing Sawyer like an endless loop of his memory. The memory of when the love of his life told him he is worthless and the moment he tried to end his life.
"Victor" I got up and finally understood the gravity of his pain. I stood infront of him and stared into his eyes. "I love you Victor I understand I understand"
He blink once and twice and he saw me standing here with him. He didn't question what I'm doing in his memory but he just ran to my arms tackling me into a hug. I feel him shake my own tears rolling down my face feeling him in my arms.
"It hurts" He sobs brokenly.
Both of us ended up on the ground leaning against the wall with all the broken things surrounding us. He leans his head on my thigh gripping onto me crying on my lap.
"I know it does" I stroke Victor's head the way I always do.
I can feel his pain but only an ounce of it and it's choking me, the mental pain is darker then I have ever felt before. I cry with him feeling connected with his feelings.
"You have to be strong Vic I know you can do it."
"I can't" He weeps "I don't know how anymore. I just want it to end, please, Kylie make it stop hurting." He begs.
I bit my lip trying to hold in my sob seeing him in his ultimate defeat the pain is too overwhelming and I understand the reason why he wanting to kill himself. He has given up on himself when he watch the only person he truly fell in love with walk out of his life without so much of a hesitation.
It could push anybody to the point of what Victor have done and I'm just so sorry I wasn't there for him when he really needed me.
"You told me the past can't hurt you if you let it but you are letting it Victor you have to get up." I spoke trying to get through to him. "You have to wake up Victor please I need you, I will always need you don't you get that?" I press a kiss on his forehead clinging onto him.
"I'm tired Kylie" He shook his head his words slurring slightly.
In the distance I hear the sound of his heart monitor beating slower, reality colliding with his memory telling me time is running out.
I lift his head making him sit up but his body fell against me his head falling on my shoulder making me sob in realization no matter what I do I can never get him back and all I could just do is erase his memory for a peaceful death that is waiting for him.
So I push my own selfish need, I push my own pain and focus on him because he has been fighting for so long to stay alive and now I understand that this is goodbye.
I wrap my arms around him giving him one last comfort lifting up his sadness.
"I'm here now Victor, it's okay you can let go. Just imagine laying on the beach with the sky so blue and air so warm and water so clear and there is no pain anymore, no more heart breaks and no more goodbyes. This is the day you will not be sad anymore because you are free." I cry through the words the heavy pain in my chest hurts so much.
He lifts his head staring at me in confusion of why I'm crying. His eyes taking in my tear stained face and I think he knows that I will never see him again. That this is not a dream but a goodbye from me.
I lift my hand and wipe his tears staring at this person I will always love.
"I want you to know my love will never die for you and I will meet you one day joining you on that beach." I smiled watching him lean his face against my hand. "I love you so much Victor and I wish I could make you stay but I can see no matter what I do you can't but it's okay. I'll find a way to be okay again." My lips tremble from the agony of letting him go.
"I don't know what I'll do without you" Tears ran down his face.
"Oh you'll know." I smiled believing in that. "You were always the strongest one just promise me one thing will you?" I place my hand in his.
"What?" He smiled softly.
"Be happy, be happy for both of us"
"I'll be happy if I'm with you so come with me" He pleads breaking my heart more.
I hear his heart monitor slowing down drastically the long beep is the noise I dread. The lights in this place starts flickering like a symbol of his life slipping away from me.
"I wish I could Victor, I wish I could" My smile trembled.
He leans down again to lean his head against my shoulder, I place a kiss on his shoulder.
"I wish I could have brought you to Crystal Falls, I wish I had time to tell you everything." I feel him drifting away from me.
"I wish it was you I fell in love with because it's easy to fall in love with you." Victor mumbled. "But you don't get to choose who you love."
I lift his hand and kiss it one last time before being pulled away. I open my eyes back to reality hearing the flat line of his heart monitor. I stood up seeing nurses and doctors coming in to see what's going on. They look at me for confirmation to proceed in treating him since I am the person who decide if it's time to turn his machines off that is keeping him alive.
Tate took hold of my hand in comfort, holding onto him tightly afraid to let go and if I do I might fall apart.
I shook my head at them the doctor staring at me in sympathy and understanding telling me it's the right thing to do because he's suffering.
The doctor reach for his oxygen ready to turn it off when his heart beat picked up making all of us freeze. His heart becoming more stronger beating in a healthy speed.
"What's happening?" I grip Tate's hand for support.
"He's fighting back," The doctor looks baffled like nothing like this ever happened.
A patient on the brink of dying, organs failing but his heart has never been stronger. To my amazement I see his hand twitch making me gasp rushing towards him. The doctor saw it too watching as if Victor is some sort of miracle.
I guess he is.
"I'm here Victor" I said knowing he can hear me.
I place my hands on him looking closely for a sign that he's fighting. Slowly he opens his eyes making me grin in joy. He blink rapidly trying to adjust to the light.
"Oh my god" Jane's eyes widen in disbelief.
His eyes settle on me making me smile in pure joy. This boy is giving me a heart attack, I swear. A small twitch of his lips turned up into a smile but it prevented him because of the tube stuck down his throat. The nurse notice the struggle of his breathing because of is quickly assisting him and getting rid of it. She gave him a sip of water while the doctor look at his vital signs to see if everything is alright.
"Son you really are a fighter" The doctor still seem to be in shock.
His eyes landed back on me, "I...." He pause wincing in pain from his scratchy throat from it being unused for a long period of time. "I couldn't..leave you behind" He whispered at me.
I smiled through my tears leaning down and placing a kiss on his cheek crying with such relief.
I have him back.
I have my best friend back.