Chapter Soundtrack:
Seafret - Oceans
Re-edited
♡ATTENTION ♡
This chapter contains sensual material, however it is edited for wattpad purposes. If you would like the more explicit version.. you can read the restricted chapter in my seperate book titled Freak Nasty.
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Read this chapter until you see the bold print mid-paragraph telling you to switch over to the Private chapter book :) !
Enjoy!
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Nova
Smoke from last night's fire billowed in the air, the scent of burned wood lighted my senses .. Giving off that familiarity. The sun was grasping rungs of clouds as it climbed above the horizon, casting its heat onto morning .. Drying the dew from leaves which collected during the early hours from the cool moist air. The sound of waves nearby, the water of the lake lapping at the shore carefully.
I poked my head back in the tent, lying back down under the blankets as tingles burst through the skin from my left hand. Zaryn's eyes blue as the sky met my own which were the grass he looked down on.
"Good morning." His deep voice was raspy with his first words of the day. I felt the pull to him, my skin wanting to be on his as I turned on my side to face him.
The sun cast light through the gray material of the tent, skating against the shadows. Lying on my side, my head rest inches away from his own.
"How did I get here? With you?" My own voice was thick with morning rasp as well. Zaryn looked so sensual when he awoke from sleep.. His lips swollen and eyes so bright but heavy lidded. I wanted to kiss those lips, enjoying the second kiss of my life. Our first was under circumstances I don't wish to remember.
His eyes landed on my mouth, I wonder if he was thinking the same?
"You passed out last night. So while everyone was preoccupied, I brought you out here.. Miles away from the packhouse. I keep a tent here for when I want to get away. No one comes here. Its too far." He supplied, his breathy voice... his hand running over his chest.. it was doing things to my body. A growing excitment between my thighs as i licked my lips.
I felt like I was sneaking around, doing something I wasn't supposed to be doing behind everyone's back. The feeling it gave me was a high like I've never experienced.. But it would only bring misery for me after the high wore off.
I pulled my lip into my mouth, biting it with my teeth, trying to remember what happened.
"Nova you haven't been eating. You're skin and bones... Your ribs are sticking out for Christ sake." Worry filled his blue orbs and my eyes widened a fraction, wondering how he even knew.. as I lifted the blankets i noted I was just in a large T-shirt and my panties.
Not my tshirt.
I glanced back up to him with questioning eyes.
"I changed you. You were wearing a dress." I felt his burning gaze linger on my flesh through the material of the shirt i wore. My breasts tingled from his stare.. nubs straining against the fabric. I can always feel where his eyes land.. Appreciating the view.
My lips parted, inhaling our mingled scent.. taking in deep breaths as I took in his form. His bare torso, skin so perfectly tanned.. the dips and curves of every protruding muscle as he flexed, ingrained in my memory.. I'm sure he was only in his boxers.. Being so close to his skin had mine heating up quickly. The sexual tension in the air hung thick like fog.. i needed to break away from this trance.
"What happened last night?" I questioned, my hands gripping the blankets to me as I snuggled in further, pulling them over my chest. Zaryn let out a breath, his focus returning.. eyes lifting up to the ceiling of the tent, fluttering closed.
"It seems your brother is Grace's mate. Which doesn't make sense at all." My brows furrowed. She can't be his mate. He's not an Alpha.
Before I could voice it, his semi rough hand was on my hip, sparks radiating from his touch into my lower half... My phemoral artery pulsating against my flesh as my breath hitched.
If you are wanting to read the restricted chapter for this, in the seperate book, please turn there now. Be sure to turn back once finished and find the bold print down further for the spot where you need to pick up reading ;)
Our eyes met in one breif moment. Enraptured in each others scent. Our lips parting in sync, he pulled me close, rotating me so I was now on my other side facing away from him. His hand slid over my other hip and further down to rest on my abdomen, pulling me into his naked chest.
My pulse thumped. This wasn't right.. but it was. I wasnt going to stop it. My body hummed in a current synchronized with his.. pulsing as one.
I sighed, feeling more relaxed than I have been in a very long time. The shards of my heart took a pause from attempting to dislodge themselves from my body.. They retreated and sat still. The safe sensations he gave me.. the blissful satisfaction had my muscles uncoiling... The electricity from his touch so pleasing to me.
His warm breath came out in puffs on the back of my neck. He was straining himself yet letting go. His nose pressed into the side of my neck, inhaling as i angled my head to give him better access.. my teeth holding my bottom lip hostage. Once his nose touched my skin, i felt his lips soon follow.. kissing the soft flesh there slowly... his tongue darting out tasting my skin .. teeth coming out to nibble.. he teased the flesh.. his tongue trailing a line to that spot. That spot a mark could be placed.
I felt chills all over my body, my wolf relishing the feeling of our mate touching us... being near. A small gasp came out of my mouth and i felt compelled. I pushed my ass into him, feeling him hard against me while his arms encircled my waist.. one over and one under my sides, pressing my hips into him further.. my neck angled for him to keep ravashing with his mouth and teeth. To keep tasting. My mouth opened.. a mewling sound id never made before, rolling out of my throat..
The arm under my side came up, his hand moving up my body as he pressed his scent into me.. both of us inhaling the others pheremones.. I felt that hand skim up my shirt, touching skin as i gasped.. his hand still moving, up between my chest.. closing in delicately around my throat.
He was holding me to his body as if he never could let me go.. the hand around my neck showing me he was dominant.. that he was strong enough but could be gentle as well. My available arm reached behind me as i breathed heavily, hand feeling his muscular hip.. needy fingers tracing his V line.
I was right. He was only wearing boxers.
A low rumble came from his chest, vibrating into my back and my insides. My wolf was purring in satisfaction at his approval.
I knew what i was doing was wrong but i couldnt stop myself.. The pull was too great even though I was thinking of Grace and the pup she carried only moments before...
My wolf was blocking it out of my mind, forcing me to focus on the feelings, first hand. Sometimes you just can't overpower your wolf. Sometimes its impossible even though you're still in skin form.. The wolf sees her mate and wants what's hers.
Zaryn's greedy mouth was still sucking, licking and tasting my neck as i moaned, wiggling my hips into him. He released his gentle hold on my neck, sliding his hand down my torso till he came to the hem of my shirt. He then moved that hand up over my hip, taking the shirt with him as he moved. fingertips skimmed over the lace band of my thong, my waist and slowly brushed over my ribs as he moved the shirt up, my chest heaving in anticpation the entire time.
He paused. taking the time to gently stroke my ribs, fingers sliding to the front to graze the dip below my breast but never touching me there..
A whimper followed by a moan came from my lips which he responded to with a low growl.. Soothing. The ache between my legs was so strong.. Begging me to revel in his touch.. Let him savor me.. Make me his.
He pressed himself into me, he seemed harder now, strong against my rear. Warm breath came to my neck once more followed by his tongue.. Tasting me. His wolf growled low, forcing mine to surge forward. I turned in his arms, my shirt bunched up, still covering my breasts but my stomach exposed. my wolf peeked out.. her eyes looking into the eyes of Zaryn's wolf. Her mate. They had taken over our minds, pushed us to the back to enjoy themselves in our skins.
I felt everything.. Everything she felt, I felt and visa versa... I just couldn't take control of my mind. She was in charge right now.. but i was there too. The sexual tension was too much for me to handle which allowed her to surface.. needing to feel her mate.
His wolf's eyes.. gold liquid, staring into mine before a hand cupped the side of face, lips pressing into mine as he took me, rolling me to my back gently and placing himself snugly between my legs. Strong arms like steel cables covered in flesh, caged around me. Defined muscles protruded from his skin, under my palms as I snaked my hands down his torso... Feeling him. His tongue danced in my mouth, Exploring me as he leaned down into my body.. Joining his hips into mine. I spread my legs wide, accommodating his width.
His kiss was powerful.. Filled with desire and demanding. It was as if he was trying to put his scent in my mouth with his tongue.. Making sure no crack or crevice went untouched. Passionate. His breath mixing with mine as we devoured each other.
I growled low into his kiss, my hand going into his hair, feeling the silkiness of it. Moaning, I angled my head for him so he could taste me, all of me. His hand caressed my jaw before cupping it sweetly, thumb on my cheek with fingers splayed behind my ear.. His wolf was enjoying this.. His wolf had a sweet side to him.
He nibbled on my lower lip a little before plunging his tongue back into my mouth.. Pleasure filled my body, arousing me more as I pushed up into him... Meeting his thrust.
I'd say it was an above par second kiss.
His mating hormones permeated the air.. He was going to press his scent into me on every surface of my body, Marking me in a different way. Canines slid from his mouth, exciting my wolf and hers slid out as well.
He was hard against the thin material between my thighs, already moist.. pressing himself into me harder and I could feel that he had slipped out of his boxers... his flesh touching my inner thigh.. sending a shiver up my spine. Pleasure.
Taking my bottom lip between his teeth, he sucked on it one last time, canines nicking my lip a little before taking my shirt I was wearing, which was his, and pulling it up, over my head and off my body in one swift movement, discarding it on the ground next to us. My breathing picked up as I stared up at him with my wolf's eyes. All my senses coming at me in vast amounts as my wolf dominated my body with her own needs and wants. His eyes such a vibrant honey gold now, dilated as he took in my bareness.. Appreciative rumbles released from his chest, vibrating between us. My greedy eyes roved over his torso, the muscles clenching in his abdomen spurring my wolf on, liking what she saw. I liked it as well. Moving my gaze up, his wolf in control, was staring down at me with desire.. Jaw clenched, arms straining.. Taking deep breaths in.. Smelling me.
He leaned down, pressing his nose into my neck, taking in my scent. Engulfing me .. imprinting it to his memory as my wolf did the same to him. The pheromones from my arrousal saturated the air around us. All you could smell was us.
His tongue flicked out, catching the soft flesh of my throat, sucking it in between his teeth, biting it softly. I threw my head back, moaning at his touch as his hand gently came up, caressing my left breast.. Fingers rubbing down.. brushing against a peaked bud. I was pressing myself against him, feeling his hips thrust against me as I rocked while his mouth assaulted my hot tingling skin.
He moved down my body, tasting flesh in his wake. kneeling between my legs now, my knees falling apart to the sides, putting myself on full display, apart from the lace which covered my virtue. Fingers splayed across my ribs as his mouth sucked the skin of my breast hard.. Leaving love bites all around the flesh before taking a bud in his mouth and making it his. Teeth bit down gently making my tremble. He repeated the same action to the other making me buck against him with a need. He kept rocking against me, faster. His tongue skated down my stomach, biting flesh softly as he went.. my back raising off the ground. Teeth scraped against my skin leaving trails of red and I felt an unfamiliar pull inside me.. Like a wave bursting to crash on the shore.
With my nails in his shoulders, long scratches along his back that the wolf couldnt help but to leave, he pressed his cheek on my stomach and rubbed it against me, putting his scent on me. His mouth came to latch against my hip bone, the pressure between my legs, against my core, gone. My wolf whined, wanting her mate back between her.
He paused, his eyes finding ours.. knowing what she wanted. What we wanted, before positioning himself back between us. He rocked fast, rubbing against me. Mewls escaped my mouth.. the wolf feeling so entranced.. my legs pulling back to wrap around him. His thumb dipping between us, rubbing against my bundle of nerves had me panting.. Gasping for air as the waves of what I assume to be a release, built up, ready to crash over me. Claws coming out of my nail beds once more to dig into his skin, holding him to me.
A growl vibrated out from his chest to mine.. Low and warning. His mouth quickly latched onto mine in a frenzy, our wolves enjoying playing with each other in human form.. Pushing us for more.
Rumbles from his throat into my mouth with every rocking motion had my back arching, every movement from his thumb sending me spiraling upward out of my body. I threw my head back, breaking the kiss before coming apart beneath him as he did the same above me.. exquisite release.
His wolf was fighting him at the end, trying to take over... to mark me. I watched as fur lanced through his pores like sharp quills.. Bones snapping above me before realigning. My own wolf was spurring me to mark him as well, his scent on my stomach coming out strong.. We wanted each other as we both crackled and shifted on the ground.
Pressing my hands to my head, shouting inside my mind for my wolf to come back to me... she came back, her hunger now sated. I forced her in her den.. the corner of my mind.. Locking her inside myself.
A moment later, our skin sides having taken control, were staring at each other, him hovering over me.. eyes wide, our chests heaving, heavy breathing. He looked down between us at my spent body, eyes closing, head falling in shame.
"I'm sorry" it came out weak. He was anything but weak. Except around me.
"I'm sorry too." I gazed at him in embarassment. We were both ashamed. Our wolves got the best of us. He peered back up at me... his eyss lingering on every mark my skin bore.
"But I don't regret it." His words were honest. He didn't regret what we did... Just the fact that he allowed his wolf to break through. It showed he lacked control.
I watched as he leaned up, unzipping a backpack behind him and taking out a tissue, wiping his arousal off my stomach before wrapping it in a plastic bag, probably to bury it to keep away from nosey wolves who might come across it with our scent on it.
This is the point you should start reading again, if you were reading the scandolous version in my PRIVATE chapters book.
"I need to get dressed." I made a move to get up but he stopped me.
"Wait. We need to get into the water before you go back to the pack house. Here." He handed me a bottle of body wash.. Neutral scented. I wonder if Grace has been here...
"Has she been here?" My curiosity got the best of me. He shook his head, eyes meeting mine. "No. Never." Truth.
I nodded before pulling myself up and stepping out into the Forrest, ready to wash his scent away that the wolf so lovingly put into me and head back to the pack house. I didn't try to cover myself.. I still had my panties on and he had already seen my body. There's no such thing as modesty among wolves.. With mates it's different because we pay attention to detail but there was nothing for me to be embarrassed about. Its just skin.
The tent was set so close to the waters edge. I scanned the horizon, feeling the heat from his body envelop me as he stood behind me. "Where are we?"
He pointed to the left, nothing but miles long of lake in the distance. We were sheltered under an alcove type area with dense trees shading us from the waters view. "Down that way a few miles is the pack house. We are on neutral territory."
I whipped around to face him. "Were not on the pack lands?" My eyes became huge. It was dangerous for wolves to stay in neautral zones.. Anything could happen... Hunters.. Rogues.. Anything.
He pulled me into him, my bare chest pressing into his. "Hey its alright. Nothing is going to happen. I'm here with you. Just get in the water ok?" He rubbed my back soothingly before I nodded and pulled away, ducking low and hopping into the water. Glancing down at my body, the water only came to my hips, the rest of my torso showing..
Red love bites all over my torso.. Canine marks down my stomach .. Claw marks on my sides. His scent was rubbed into my skin. It would be hard to get off.
"Zaryn... Really?" I gave him a look of disbelief . he cringed a little before saying he was sorry again. I slid my panties off under the water and balled them up, throwing them to the bank. They were ruined.
He climbed into the water with me, taking the soap from my hands. He poured some Into his palm before handing it back to me, eyes glued to my form, looking at me with pride over his markings. I rolled my eyes, sinking down into the water, away from his curious blue skies.
This was going to hurt later... Thinking about this moment we shared.. Our wolves shared, while he is sitting next to Grace.. My brothers mate.
My poor brother... I need to go check on him.. And Deacon.
Guilt seeped into my veins as my mind begin to forget the moment we just shared together and remembered the things my mate has done.. My mate. Nic was there for me last night and now its my turn to be there for him but I wasn't. I need to go to him.. Talk to him. There's no words to describe what he was feeling.
I felt guilty for even enjoying myself with him just a moment ago... Guilty because of all the pain I've been put through the last few weeks and here I am, sharing intimate moments with my mate... My mate who is the father to another she wolf's pup..
Our wolves were going to be a problem...
I closed my eyes, taking in a deep breath before sinking under the water. I was floating just under the surface... Feeling so light weight.. I wish I could just float like this forever and never have to go back home. I wish Grace would disappear and the pup right along with her.. None of this is my fault except falling into the tide of the mate bond, letting it pull me together with Zaryn for a few moment of abandonment.. Forgetting everything. Thanks to our wolves. The only way to ensure it wouldn't happen again would be to stay away.
Its one thing to know your mate and know he's having a pup with another... But a different thing all together to feel something for that mate... I didn't want to mess around and Start feeling more emotions than what the bond allowed. That would cause a disaster..
Pushing myself up out of the water, I was met with a broad muscular back sporting bloody scratch marks all over a few feet away.. Some of them a little deep. He was washing his hair, the muscles in him rippling..
"Oh my.." I whispered, shocked that i had done that.. That my wolf had done that. My canines slid out, my jaw aching to mark him and I immediately turned around, hiding my face as I poured body wash into my palm, scrubbing his scent out of my body and my hair, focusing on my stomach.
His voice came from behind, closer than he was. "I can feel when you are looking at me. Its like a surge of electricity spikes through my system.. Everywhere your eyes land." His voice was strained.
"What did you "oh my" about?"
Turning around to face him, my canines had hidden themselves back inside my gums. I looked up into his sky blue eyes. "Your back.. Its pretty bad. I'm sorry."
He let out a breath of laughter and smiled. "I like them. Trust me. I know they are there."
He reached out but I took that moment to duck under water, washing the remnants of his scent off my body along with the soap.
I let myself pop back up, heading to the shore to climb out. "Nova. I... I want you to know..."
Turning around, I held my hand up. "It's okay Zaryn. You don't have to explain. I know it was a mistake. I know we have to stay away from each other." I couldn't meet his eyes.
"What?? No Nova. I don't want to stay away from you! You weren't a mistake.. Our wolves took over sure.. But it wasn't a mistake. I.. I care about you... If Grace miscarries I want to be able to gain your love... I wan-"
"And what if she doesn't Zaryn? What if she delivers?" I glared up at him, pain in my eyes.
His eyes lingered down my body for a moment before they fell to the water between us. "I told you.. If she delivers I'm not marking her. Regardless of if you will take me or not. I don't know what is going to happen in the future but I know if the pup lives.. I'll be a father. I won't be with Grace but I'll be a father until he has to go away at ten years old.. Then he will come to me every summer. Alone. I don't know if you will want me or not.." He trailed off, eyes meeting mine. "But I'll leave that option open for you.. For you to decide. I know its asking a lot.. So I won't ask. We can just see ... The moon isn't so cruel as to keep us apart. I honestly believe inside that the pup won't make it.. Part of me hopes she does miscarry as awful as I sound.... But my wolf wants the pup. Its weird being on opposite ends but my wolf is parental..."
We shared a moment earlier, just he and I.. We pretended like nothing else existed earlier and it was nice. But now reality is crashing down on top of us.. Squeezing my air supply along with it.
Reality is a snake.. A snake with thick coils big enough to wrap around your insides, squeezing until you have nothing left.
"Nova I don't want to pretend like this didn't happen.. You mean so much to me.. To my wolf. We do not care for Grace. She's merely an incubator. My wolf wants you. I want you. We can spend time together at least.. Just us."
I shook my head. "No we can't Zaryn. You saw what happened when we are alone.. They take over. They possess us and we don't have a say in what happens. We could wind up doing a lot worse and then what? We can't. We just can't. As much as I feel the need to be around you, I can't. It will just hurt in the end... And you need to get over seeing Deacon as a threat. He's your brother and my best friend! I will be friends with him. Tell your wolf he needs to stop. Do you think its fair to tell me I can't have anyone? That I can't have my friend to talk to? While I'm forced to watch you parade your whore around like a show pony.." I was getting angry, my wolf was fighting with me to claim him, taking her out of the equation but I was winning. Barely.
I stepped out into the warm air. The sun was higher overhead , it was probably about 9:00 now. I let the air dry me, careful not to touch any of his belongings which would hold his scent.
Twigs snapped behind me, I could feel his eyes watching me.. Tingles from my back, down to my legs and back up.
"Nova. I can't help but to feel that way. I know its not fair to you.. None of this is.. but its safer for you. Trust me."
"Just stop it! Give me something! Anything! Give me my friend back!" I cried out, lashing out at him with my fists on his chest. His hands latched around my wrists but I jerked them free. A warning growl rumbled from his chest and I just fell down, crying on the grass. His knees popped as he knelt over me, hand rubbing my back.
"I'm sorry. I'm so so sorry."
There was pain in his voice. But not as much pain as there was in my heart.
~~~
After my outburst we got dressed, he had brought some of my clothes along with us so I wouldn't have to wear his back. I discarded my ruined panties into the woods and pulled on my jeans and T-shirt, no bra , underwear or shoes allotted. Good thing it was a T-shirt I was wearing.
I asked him how we got here and he pointed through the trees above us where a canoe sat behind the brush. Helping him carry it out, we set it in the water and climbed in. We set out toward the pack lands, each of us rowing simultaneously. I don't know how he managed to bring me here last night, using both by himself. It was hard work.
I watched his muscles ripple with each stroke as we switched from side to side. His skin goosed wherever my eyes lingered so I removed them, focusing my attention to the task at hand until I remembered something..
"Zaryn how is Grace Nic's mate? Her father is an alpha.."
He shrugged before letting out a breath. "I don't know... I need to talk to my dad about that but my guess is that there's something either her or her father isn't telling us.. Then again he could have been a member of the pack who challenged the previous alpha and won, making him the new alpha. He wouldn't have alpha blood though so the probability of him winning with an Alpha are slim to none... I don't know. I've thought about it I'm just confused." He sighed tiredly.
"Oh. Okay." I whispered. There was something there, I just didn't know what it could be..
We were silent the rest of the way, deep in our own thoughts. An hour later we were coming near the pack house. He asked for my paddle and I gave it to him, his body never turned my way. With both oars he rowed us into a hollowed part of the bank a little ways away from the pack house and got out, tying it off to a tree jutting out of the bank.
I was glad he docked us somewhere away from prying eyes..
He reached for my hand and I gave it to him, feeling those tingles shoot through my body. As soon as my bare feet hit land, I took my hand, keeping myself from going crazy from his touch.. All I could think about were his hands on me... Lips on mine.. His nimble fingers..
"Nova" he snapped his fingers in front of my face making me snap out of my thoughts.
"What.." My eyes widened a bit.
"Did you hear anything I said? " a slight frown between his eyes had me shaking my head no.
"I said I want you to promise me something.."
He wanted me to promise him something? I scoffed at the audacity ..
"Nova its not what you think... I just want you to promise me you'll start eating. I.. I think you're beautiful regardless but... It worries me seeing you this thin." His eyes met mine and I felt like I was drowning in emotion.. The big blue waves being his eyes.. So much sincerity. So much honesty.. He stepped into me and I couldnt move. I felt like I was stuck to the ground. His lips pressed gently onto mine, hands approaching my sides before I stepped away from him, breaking the kiss.
"I have to go" my voice broke and my eyes found the ground appealing.
"Promise me. That you'll eat. At least try. Please." He rasped, voice thick with desire.
I nodded, turning away. "Goodbye Zaryn."
"No. I'll see you later. Never say goodbye." His voice was deep.. More emotion playing through. I trudged onward without looking back. The further away I got from him, the colder my skin became. The muscles that were once relaxed in his presence became coiled around my insides again as I thought about the things we just did while everything was going on..
I can't do that again.. I can't let myself be near him. It wasn't my fault waking up next to him.. But now I know what happens if my wolf is near him .. Smelling him.. Knowing he has duties to another makes her throw me to the back and take lead over my body.. My own skin side is supposed to be mine.
Power of the mate bond..
I came through the trees, noting no one was outside on this side of the house and ran into the side door of the mudroom. Safe and sound. No one saw...
After I take another shower and scrub my skin.. I need to find my brother. I need to talk to him.
Then I need to find Deacon. Fuck Zaryn and his requests. His wolf can kiss my ass.
Its funny actually how my life was once a bright shining thing.. Then after my birthday it became a tragedy..
A sad warped tradgedy.