“What’s to understand?”Accel murmured quietly, slinking across the room on deadly feet.
I swallowed heavily. This! Everything! I don’t understand any of this!
The fluorescent lighting wasn’t doing much to calm my already shredded-to-bits nerves. Apart from burning the eyes out of my skull, it simply aided Accel in looking darker than he already was. His black hoodie, raven black hair and the ever expanding depths of his dark personality was the greatest contrast to the stark white lighting. He looked like some kind of deadly serpent, ready to strike out without a moments notice. And I was his target… that much was obvious. I watched in the mirror as he glided closer on silent feet, his jade gaze fixed on mine in the reflection.
Shit… Oh God, kill me now. Do it. Please?
Within seconds he was sliding his arms around my waist under the uniform, stroking sensually, his hot breath caressing my ear. I shut my eyes against the onslaught, bracing myself on the worn edges of the cold ceramic sink, losing myself in the burning heat of his hands as they travelled to the waistband of my loose shorts.
Not now! Oh my God not now!
I felt hot fingertips trace spirals on my hip bone, sending my mind into a lust induced frenzy.
“What do you need to understand sweet AJ? Hmm?” he whispered darkly, “Your body understands me just fine.”
With those words he traced a light hand over the front of my shorts, feeling my obvious desire.
“Shit,” I muttered through gritted teeth, trying to push aside the onslaught of intense pleasure.
I felt him silently laughing, the need in his voice growing. “Come on, Andrew, baby,” he moaned with his hand pressing firmer right there, “I need you.”
Fuck that feels so good dammit.
But this is wrong. This is so wrong.
With a firm shove I spun around, attempting to push away from the devil boy, instead falling straight into his arms. And just like that his lips were crushing mine.
Lust speared through me faster than a lightning bolt and I couldn’t control myself any longer. I threaded my fingers firmly through the silky strands of Accel’s hair, the thrusts of his hot, wet tongue inside my mouth driving me to insane levels of desire. Fuck it. I want it, I want it so bad. His hands nearly tore at my shirt, burning their trail up to my sensitive nipples, electricity zapping through me as his fingers caressed the sensitive nubs. Unknowingly I arched against him, my body practically pleading for more, every nerve ending screaming with want. Every tiny thing turned me on more; the way his hair brushed my face, sending soft shudders down my spine, how his lips and tongue demanded the surrender of my body to his will, how his hands smoothly glided to the fly of my shorts, wrenching open the zip and clasping my desperate erection firmly in his hot palm. It was the only thing I wanted, he was the only thing I wanted. I needed him. I needed Accel.
“Accel,” I whimpered as his hand stroked up and down the length of my aching cock, “I- I-I n-nee- oh fuck! I need you!” My teeth clamped down on my lip, my back arching as his hand clutched tighter, his face burrowed in the messed layers of my hair. By now I was braced against the sink, almost sitting on the ceramic basin, as pleasure drove spear after spear through my body. Screwing my eyes closed, all I could do was whimper and pant as his hand slid under the Bond’s underwear, to finally wrap his burning hand around my rock solid member. I felt like crying with need. Oh fuck… fuck this shit! Oh my GOD!
“What was that princess?” he panted in my hair, “I didn’t quite hear that.”
I almost screamed with frustration as his hand stilled. Why did you stop!? Why the fuck did he stop!?
“I need you! I fucking need you!” I yelled through gritted teeth, breathing heavily with need, “Just… please!”
I could feel the smirk lining his lips; I didn’t need to see it to know.
Abruptly he pulled away.
“Good.”
And left.
***
No. No. NO! NO! NO! NO!
NO!
Where is he going! He can’t just…. LEAVE me!
WHAT!
Frantically I scrabbled off the sink, desperately doing up my fly as I ran out the door, my desire fading just as quickly as he had walked out that door. I had to catch him, I had to. There was no other option. I wanted an explanation and I wanted it now.
No-one leaves me hanging like that without an explanation… NO-ONE.
My feet pounded the worn pavement as I raced in the direction I had seen Accel disappear. Every step I took built the commotion of thought racing through my head. I had only known this guy for about three/ four days max and somehow he had flipped me upside down and was holding me off the top of a seventy storey building. But WHY? Was he really just that messed up inside his head? Or was it something else? Did he have a bad break up or some shit and this was his twisted way of getting revenge? Was he from a ‘broken home’? Was he mental… like actually mental, mental asylum worthy? A psychological matter or something? Maybe he had one of those disorders that make you act strange. Or maybe he didn’t.
That was the thing.
I didn’t know and I needed to.
And I was going to.
Even if I had to kidnap him or some insane thing like that.
I wanted to know why me?
Of all people, why me?
***
I found him standing against the wall in the gym. The room itself was empty, the air filled with the rancid smell of nicotine, burning down my throat. I coughed harshly against the sudden onslaught towards my lungs. The combined smells of the gym itself and the cigarettes made my head spin. Reluctantly I braced myself against the doorway, fighting the nausea rising in my stomach for the second time that day.
“Chasing me now AJ?” Accel’s voice called from the opposite side of the cramped room, “Didn’t think you were the type.”
More smoke swirled through the air; I guessed he had just taken another draw of the drug.
Why is it always in freaking confined spaces that we have to converse?
I sighed; mentally strengthening my mind for the insane ups and downs that I had come to learn was Accel in his purest form.
I let out another rush of air and entered the smoke clouded room.
“Accel,” I called sternly.
More smoke.
“Why are you doing this?” I asked firmly, trying to catch his eyes through the stifling room. The black hood and his hair shaded the cool, collected gaze he gave me, the cigarette dangling lightly from the end of one hand slung casually in the air near his face. The other arm was crossed over his stomach as he leant heavily from the wall with the smoke curling from between soft pouting lips, flowing over the piercing in the tempting bottom lip. His expression didn’t change once from when I had entered room to now, me creeping slowly across the room towards him. Every second tugged at my conscious as he observed my movements calmly. There was no telling what he would do next, whether he would suddenly lunge at me, or pull another one of his disappearing acts.
Calm down Andrew. Panicking won’t do anything, besides you want to know don’t you? Just play it cool.
Cool? Right. Are you INSANE! You do know Accel right? ‘Cool’ isn’t exactly on his agenda. He’s more ‘ooh you’re so sexy’ and then ‘love me or else I will maim you to death’. This boy could kill and not think twice about it.
Just calm the FUCK down right NOW. Talking to yourself is the first sign of madness, remember?
Oh well I’m glad I cleared that up.
Shut up and concentrate.
I held his gaze firmly, determined to get a reaction. The jade gaze burned through me, challenging me, mocking me. But I held my ground.
“What’s going on Accel?” I said softly. I reached out to him, my hand softly brushing his fringe out of his enthralling eyes. Why are you being so gentle with him? After everything he’s done to you?
I didn’t know. What I did know was that something wasn’t right. Just looking into his eyes told me that it wasn’t right, it was almost like the way he was looking at me he was pleading for help but trying to push me away at the same time. He needed me.
I searched his eyes with my grey ones, seeking an answer but not finding one. His arms fell at his sides, the cigarette falling to the ground as he suddenly leapt on me, burrowing into my chest desperately.
What the-?
I stood in shock as Accel clamped his arms around me in a tight hug, his face buried in the crook of my neck. He was shaking uncontrollably, hot breath rolling over my skin, the piercing slightly warm from the heat of the cigarette.
He was crying.
“Accel…?” I murmured slowly, tentatively raising my hands to softly stroke his hair.
I waited for a few tense minutes as the guy I had once thought so unbreakable turned into a sobbing boy in my arms.
What is happening to the world…?
“Y-y-ou know,” Accel hiccupped, looking up into my eyes with a face wracked with pain and sadness, “y-you’re the o-o-only p-person to ask m-me that in f-five year-rs?”
Five years?
I stared down at him in confusion, slightly uncomfortable with the amount of bodily contact this ‘comforting’ required.
He sighed heavily, burrowing back into the crook of my neck, his hair tickling my cheek.
“S’pose I can’t leave you hangin’ now can I?” he muttered into the sensitive skin.
I continued staring down at him, curious but not really wanting anything to do with this at all.
Well… you wanted to understand didn’t you Andrew?
Slowly I detangled myself from the tear stained boy, shuffling over to an abandoned weights bench and forcing him to sit down. His head sagged down until his face was covered with shaking hands. His body still quaked with slight shivers, wracked with misery and loss. I had no idea what was going on, I just came in here for an answer to my question. I suppose he was going to answer it, just not really in the way I expected. Then again… Accel wasn’t someone you could exactly ‘expect’.
He groaned in frustration, raking his fingers harshly over his face, staining already running eyeliner down his cheeks further. Didn’t think he wore eyeliner… I guess I’m not really that surprised, it is Accel after all. Eccentric in the worst possible ways.
With another heavy groan he spoke, “Do you think you have problems Andrew?”
My mind instantly blanked. Great. “Uh… sure,” I answered, not entirely sure how I was meant to respond.
He gave a short dry laugh, humour not exactly the right word to use in this situation.
“You have no fucking idea,” he said, shaking his head and looking over at me from under his fringe, for once the red in his eyes from the tears he shed matching what I thought was his personality. Obviously not.
I didn’t answer.
“You think I was born like this,” he spoke, disgust clearly lacing his voice as he gestured widely to himself. “This freak? You think this is me? I’m a fucking sick person Andrew, I know it and I know you do to. But I wonder why you suddenly decided to care, hmm? Was it my ‘nature’ that drew you in? Or did you just want ‘in’ on the whole ‘screw around with the psychopath’ gig that seems to be happening recently?”
“No,” I answered softly, truthfully.
“I didn’t think so. So why Andrew? Why do you care about someone like me?” He stared at me intently, his eyes almost pleading with me to give him an answer he could actually believe. The only thing was, I didn’t have an answer for him.
“I-I don’t know,” I stuttered, attempting to escape his gaze.
He smiled slowly, but it didn’t reach his eyes. I watched warily as something broke inside him, tears and frustration welling in those jade green eyes again.
“Do you wanna know?” he whispered, voice barely audible in the stifling room.
Yes.
“Know what?” I asked softly.
“About me Andrew?” he said, staring helplessly into my eyes, “Do you want to know what happened to me?”
I attempted to gouge the truth of his question out of the look he gave me, instead finding myself drowning in the power of his beautiful jade eyes.
“Yes,” I answered on a soft breath of air.