I am halfway through the book, and it is just beginning to get interesting.
I have been sitting here on the couch all day reading, because I have nothing better to do.
New York is a big city, and there are plenty of places I could go, plenty of people I could make friends with, but I'd rather be here.
I'm reading from the light of the vintage lamp I brought to the apartment, it has the perfect lighting if I find the right position.
My eyes continue to flit over the black ink, and I have successfully blocked out all other noises of traffic, until I hear a slam.
I hope it is not what I think it is, because it sounds like the arrival of Jess, I try to ignore it but I can't.
I look up, Jess is standing in the doorway, and he's holding his jacket, his brown eyes lock with mine.
I awkwardly tuck my hair behind my ears, and force my eyes to look back at my book.
I hear another slam, and when I look up again, Jess is gone.
These are the kind of awkward exchanges we've been having lately.
I try to get back into my book, but I can't, because all of the words I want to say to him keep repeating themselves in my mind.
I can't stop thinking about him, because of all the anger I've kept to myself.
All the memories of us in Stars Hollow, it drives me crazy.
I close my book, sliding the bookmark between the pages, and then getting up.
I walk into the kitchen and glance out the window.
The dark night sky and the stars are enough to trigger my exhaustion, I go back into the living room to grab my book.
As I'm walking back towards my bedroom, Jess opens his door and steps out, waking in the opposite direction of me.
His shoulder hits mine, throwing me off balance.
"Hey! Watch it!" I say.
"Sorry." He replies, very insincerely, hands in the air, he begins to back away.
I scoff, and walk swiftly into my bedroom.
****
When I wake up the next morning, the sun streams through my window, and I almost forget where I am, considering how used to stars hollow I am.
Then I remember Jess, and how awkward everything is with him, and how I can barely walk by him without him seeming mad.
Like he's the one who should be mad.
When I open my door, I see the front door slam.
Jess is obviously going somewhere, he's always going somewhere.
I've been at home reading most days, sometimes I'm out at job interviews, but mostly I've been alone at home.
I decide that if Jess can go out all the time, so can I.
I eat breakfast, shower, and get changed.
Then I go out, walking down the main streets.
There are so many people crowding the sidewalks, it's slightly overwhelming.
I begin to wish that I had taken my car.
Finally I see a small family owned bookstore, that seems relatively empty, so I go in.
"Goodmorning!" The cheery blonde woman at the desk says, waving.
"Oh, goodmorning!" I answer, waving back.
"Nice day out isn't it?" She says.
"Yes, it's very nice, are the streets usually this crowded?" I ask, curious.
"Oh no." She says.
"Oh good, because-" but I'm interrupted.
"They're almost always way more crowded, Monday's are slow days in New York." She nods.
"Oh." I say.
"You new here? Haven't seen you in this store before. We usually only et regulars, never any new people."
"Oh, yes. I come from Stars Hollow, it's a pretty small town. So this is a lot for me."
"Yikes, small town girl."
"Yeah." I say, heading over to the general fiction.
I browse for about an hour, flipping through the piles of books, placing books I want in their own separate pile.
The selection is amazing, the vibe is very nice, a nice break from reality.
Job searching, Jess, loneliness, being homesick.
I find a copy of To Kill A Mockingbird that I've never seen before, so I pull it out, behind it is another book.
The title is fading out on the spine of the book, so I pull it out.
"Howl."
I stop dead, book in my hand.
My eyes are locked on the books title.
Howl. The first time I met Jess.
He had been in my room, and I had offered to lend it to him.
He said he was fine, that he didn't read much.
But when I saw him the next day, he returned it to me, with notes in the margins, he then told me he'd read it about five times.
That was the first time I began to like him.
I've always loved that book.
Now I can't look at it anymore.
I drop it, and it lands on the ground with a crash.
I quickly put back all of the books, and rush out of the store.
Why does he follow me everywhere I go?
I think to myself.
I scan the streets for a coffee shop.
I see one.' Miss Margarets Café!'
I go in, and the bell on the door rings.
The walls are bright pink, and another cheery lady with blonde hair walks up to me.
"Hello, welcome to Miss Margaret's! For one?" She says, in her short pink dress.
"Um, yes please." I say nodding.
"You look too pretty to be alone, got a boyfriend?" She asks, leading me to my table.
"Nope." I say, sitting down.
"Oh, don't worry, you'll find one."
"I'm not really worried."
"Sure...." She says, hands me my menu and then walks away.
Weird.
I pick up my cell phone, and call Lane.
I'm feeling homesick and confused and need someone to vent to. Paris isn't the best choice.
"Rory!" She says, when she answers.
"Lane!" I say back.
"Oh my god, it's so boring in this town without you."
"Aw, how is everybody?" I ask.
"They're all good. Luke and Taylor got into a fight at the town meeting last night and literally starting hitting each other." Lane says, excited.
"Of course."
"I mean it's Luke and Taylor, they could fight over anything."
"Oh! Guess what??" She says.
"What?" I ask.
"Ok, so Hep Alien got a gig at a venue in New York and guess who lives in the area???" She asks.
"I believe that would be me."
"I believe you're right. However Brian has strep throat, and is complaining a lot, so the gig is still on so long as I don't have to kill him by then."
"Try to hold on then." I say, smiling.
"Yeah! We're playing on Wednesday."
"You should come to my apartment and I can show you around. I miss everyone."
"Oh, Rory everyone misses you." Lane says. "Ok, I really have to go, I'll text you the information about times and stuff."
"I can't wait to see you."
"Can't wait to see you. Bye!"
"Bye."
I hang up.
Then the cheery waiter comes back.
"What can I get for you today?" She asks.
"I'll just have a coffee please." I say.
"Coming. Right. Up." She says, writing it down, as if it was a much larger order.
I drink the coffee, but it isn't Luke's.
******
💜MaeganDeutsch you are like my #1 reader. Thank you for the support!! 💜
Thank you everyone for reading. Once again it is not good, but it's there, so yeah....
Please Keep Reading💜It means So Much!
~Chloe~