She sat silently, her gaze fixed on the blue curtain.
I regarded her for several minutes, struggling to control the flickering, violet hues. If she hadn't just become an integral part of the plan, I would have snapped her neck the second Pharro left the room.
"Tritteon," she said suddenly, her voice softening, almost hesitant. "I really am so sorry."
"It would be prudent if we did not talk about it," I said as calmly as I was capable. The gruesome chaos from all seven perspectives behind the curtain clamored for my attention. I had promised myself I would never do it again, but I wouldn't be able to think rationally where the girl was concerned if I didn't. I blocked out that entire side of the room.
She rubbed her eyes. "I can't believe I let this happen."
"I am not sure how much clearer I can be without becoming violent," I growled.
She looked up and I felt a twinge of satisfaction as her eyes widened at the sight of mine. I wished her mind was open so I could have heard the reaction.
She blew out a breath and nodded.
I sat across from her and watched her for a long moment. Her hands trembled slightly as she squeezed that icepack and her eyes kept darting to the curtain.
She really was terrified. But not just of me. She was terrified for Rilyin. I didn't need to hear her thoughts to see that.
It had been an accident—mingled with stupidity. She had even tried to save his life. It was all horrific, but it had not been malicious.
Her tale about the Poeir surge was suspicious though. I had never heard of such a thing. If anything, it sounded like someone had made another attempt on my charge's life. Intentionally summoning Poeir from that room was the only sound explanation. And that was definitely something she would have felt. Could the traitor have been there without the Kovei detecting them?
"Can we just get it out in the open," Orion broke through my thoughts, her eyes narrowed and intent on my face. "Have you decided whether or not you're going to kill me?"
I shifted and leaned toward her, resting my elbows on my knees. "You will know when I have decided," I said, just to see her squirm. I wasn't disappointed. Her jaw clenched and she drew her legs in, her knuckles turning white as she gripped the edges of the icepack tighter. I couldn't hold back a small grin.
The fear left her face instantly. "You're just trying to get under my skin."
"Possibly."
She scowled. "You tried. Multiple times today, in fact. What changed your mind? Something tells me you couldn't care less about Pharro's traitor threat."
"You really should drop it," I warned.
"I know, I know, but—"
I leaned back, raising an eyebrow. "You know I can make your death look like an accident."
She nodded slowly. "I believe you." She glanced at the curtain again. Her eyes held only a sad longing. " But I made a deal with him, and I made myself central to tomorrow's plans, and I'm guessing that counts for something with you."
The world turned violet. "So, it is all self-preservation then?"
She met my eyes without flinching, and a single tear slid down her cheek. "Tritteon, you have to know how sorry I am. True, I have no desire to be here whatsoever. But I never meant him any harm. I was entirely self-absorbed. I know this is my fault. I shouldn't have let him keep talking. He just—he just seemed to know exactly what to say to keep my focus off his behavior."
The violet faded away and I let out a long sigh. It wasn't hard to believe her. I had known Rilyin the majority of my life and that was exactly something he would have done. "I do know how he can be. I suppose I cannot blame you for the way he is. You were—you were unprepared to handle his legendary stamina and stubbornness."
She gave me a weak smile. "Legendary?"
Something inside me melted. It was almost a physical sensation. I didn't understand it, but I liked it. It was even more pleasant than seeing her discomfort. I held back my urge to return the smile and cleared my throat. "We—we have a lot to get through tonight. We should probably begin."
She nodded and sat forward.
I shot a quick look around and tapped a finger against my head.
Her thoughts and emotional and physical pain filled my head. I grimaced. Her regret and sadness were very real. She hadn't been faking anything.
"You thought I was faking?"
"I did not say that. It was merely an observation."
She gave me a disbelieving glare. "You're such a liar."
"Let's just begin."
"Fine."
"Now, the first thing you must never forget is that you cannot show a hint of emotion. Emotion is weakness."
"Do you follow this rule? I swear, every time I see you, you're either a robot or your eyes are turning black."
"If you're going to have a snide comment about every bit of information I give you, this is going to take all night."
She rolled her eyes. "Fine. Continue."
I motioned to her hands. "Your hands seem to be your biggest tells. Keep them relaxed and avoid clenching your fists. They tend to shake when you are anxious, and clenching just gives away that you are trying to hide it. Physically hide them if you cannot keep them under control."
She made a face. "I do that, don't I?"
"You are notorious for it," her Lexicon said.
"The second thing you need to remember is that you must take charge when the men salute. You are in command and they need to see that. They will not put their faith in your ability to lead them otherwise."
She bit her lips together, her discomfort resounding in her thoughts.
I couldn't help but roll my eyes. "You have been fearlessly confronting everyone from the moment you arrived. This is no different. And we will work on getting the guards profiles ingrained in your head."
She cracked a smile.
For the first hour and a half, I grilled her on every guard until she had their names and faces memorized, along with every protocol, code, and plan for every possible situation. She absorbed it all like a sponge. She was almost eidetic in her retaining abilities. And I was entirely confident that her Lexicon would scoop up anything that slipped through the cracks.
Halfway through that two-hour mark, the numbing Veehms and drugs began to wear off and an eye watering stiffness in the area she had stabbed me forced me to lay down.
"Sit here," I said, beckoning her over.
She snorted.
I glared at her.
Her amusement faltered. "Oh, you're serious." She squinted at me. "I don't know about you, but I feel sitting beside the person who has tried on multiple occasions to kill me is unwise and irresponsible."
I sighed. "With the frequency with which Colleena checks on us, it will be easier to continue to fake talking to you if your body can block her view of our faces."
She gave me a stony expression. "I'm not doing that."
I stared at her, equally unamused, until she shifted from discomfort. "Not even to divert suspicion?"
She pressed her mouth into a tight line, not missing the thinly veiled threat. Nostrils flaring, she mouthed a curse and stood shakily, snatching up her Asoiri ice pack on her way.
I slid over as she sat beside me, holding my breath against the pain.
She noticed. "Here. This helps," she said irritably, dropping the ice pack against the bandaged area on my chest.
I sucked in a sharp breath and she turned her head to hide a smile, the cold and the pain just as startling as her unwarranted passive aggressive kindness. But the surprise only increased as she situated the pack and pressed it against the correct place, and its healing properties seeped into the aching muscles.
I slid my arm behind my pillow and rested my head back. "Thank you."
She gave no indication she'd heard or cared, drawing her legs up, and stifling a yawn behind the back of her hand. "What time is it?"
"Almost three-thirty."
"How much more do we have to go over?"
"Quite a bit."
She slouched over her knees dramatically, her eyes opening and closing slowly, weighed down by exhaustion. "Could we speed this up a little? Maybe if we finish early, we can get a couple minutes of sleep."
"Sure. We will be optimistic," I said doubtfully.
She groaned. "Just get on with it."
I chuckled. "I'll go over the layout of the Rest House and its workings and then we will move on to the Royals."
"Fine. But you better hurry up. I'm not going to be awake much longer."
Despite her exhaustion, I was impressed by her memory, especially with the speed I relayed all the information. As I moved on to the Royals and their Guardians, however, I was all the more grateful for her Lexicon's ability to store every detail.
By the time I'd counted ten—the number of times I'd had to shake her awake—I relayed the final piece of information and realized the Asoiri pouch had gone warm, rendering it pointless. Lifting it away, I dropped it to the ground behind me, relieved by the diminishing pain. It wasn't entirely gone. But it had improved significantly.
A warm body slumped against me and my senses prickled, every inch of me tensing.
Orion's body had followed the downcast angle of her head and she'd melted and curled against my chest, her hair splayed out across my skin.
I swore under my breath.
But I resisted moving. We had just over an hour before Pharro returned to escort her to where she would be taking over my position, and after startling her awake so many times, I needed to allow her as much sleep as possible.
I slung out a Thet Veehm, surrounding as much of her in it as I could, and lifted her slowly away, just enough I could slide out from beneath her and—
She whimpered, her hands snagging out, and she grabbed the sheet beneath me, shifting around until her head was pressed up under my chin.
"Dammit," I hissed.
I stared up at the ceiling a long moment. I knew perfectly well this situation was my fault. I'd threatened her onto the bed. This was undoubtably the consequence of that.
I held my breath as her eyes squeezed shut tight and she made another small, disgustingly adorable whimpering noise.
I wasn't sure why but smoothing her brow with my thumb seemed like the rational thing to do.
Another whimper escaped her.
"Shh," I whispered. What sort of nightmare could she have with a wiped memory?
She shifted again, and nuzzled her face against my neck.
I stiffened.
Her breathing quickened and her body began to tremble. Whatever it was about, the nightmare was bad. Could the Oria have left bits and pieces of her past life somewhere in her subconscious?
I couldn't help it. I brushed my hand over her hair and pressed her head tight beneath my chin. She was so warm and small. The perfect size. Her hair smelled so good. But I had a feeling that had more to do with the dried blood left over in it than her actual scent.
I blinked. What was wrong with me? Thoughts and actions like this were not only inappropriate, but they were also forbidden. She was not only human. She was also my charge's prospective heir.
I had to tighten my hold around her shoulders to keep her from falling off the bed as she shifted back a little, tilting her head upward. A serene smile lit her face and her breathing slowed and deepened.
I felt that melting sensation wash over me again. She was a bit more plain in looks than I was used to, but damn, she was beautiful.
I wasn't sure how long I watched her for. I lost track of time. It wasn't too long after the suns glow filled the room that Colleena and her staff reached a confident point in Rilyin's healing that she sent everyone else off to get a little sleep. I expected any of them to look over and notice our positioning, but her team didn't give us a single glance, and she was so exhausted she collapsed in a chair outside the curtain and fell asleep.
I blew out a long, slow, breath. The relief was short lived however, as Faber Colette's thoughts came into range.
* * * * * * * * * * * * *