Music expresses that which cannot be said and on which it is impossible to be silent.
- Victor Hugo
"Don't forget, tomorrow afternoon andyan na kami ni Kuya," Harvey told Louie during their FaceTime conversation early Sunday morning. "Make sure you'll prepare an early dinner for us, okay?"
"No sweat. Magpapa-reserve ako sa favorite buffet resto natin," Louie declared.
"Hindi ba pwedeng lutong bahay care of Tita Chona?"
"Aba, at ang demanding mo rin, ano? Busy sila bukas. May mga darating na Canadian doctors today para sa medical mission bukas. Kaya hindi possible yang request mo."
"Eh di kayo na lang ni Raffie magluto," Harvey insisted gently.
"Hihirit pa 'to, eh. Hello? Whole day kaya si Raffie sa university bukas, tapos may special class daw sya sa Forte bandang hapon. Kaya nga malamang mauuna na tayo dun sa resto at hahabol na lang sya. Na-inform ko na sya kagabi tungkol dyan."
"Okay. So I'll see you at the airport tomorrow, Louie. I miss you," Harvey sweetly said.
"Likewise," was Louie's simple reply.
"Yun lang? Likewise? Hindi ba pwedeng marinig talaga yung 'I miss you, too' from you?"
"Harvey Pascual, you are the most demanding person I've ever known!" Louie complained.
"Sabihin mo na rin kasi, para tapos agad yung usapan," Harvey teased.
Louie raised her brow at him, but she eventually smiled crookedly while saying, "Fine. I miss you, too. O sige na, I have to prepare for church now. See you tomorrow."
"I love you!" Harvey said, just before Louie ended the conversation.
"Ang kulet talaga nitong taong ito," she mumbled as she prepared her dress for the morning church service.
As she went to her dresser mirror, she saw the towel cake souvenir which she literally begged from Raffie yesterday.
It was the souvenir from Raymund and Kate's wedding. She picked and placed it inside a shelf that was full of other souvenirs she had been collecting for the past five years. While arranging it, she remembered her talk with Raffie last night when their batchmates finally went home.
(Flashback)
"Wow! Ang cute naman nitong souvenir nila! Sa akin na lang 'to, ha, Chummy? Please?"
"Makakatanggi ba naman ako sa'yo? Here, take it," Raffie said as she handed the towel cake to Louie.
"Thank you so so much! Let's see...Chua-Monteverde Nuptial...apelyido pa lang bagay na, ano, Chummy? Hmmm...now let's see...how about...Carlisle-Legazpi Nuptial...well, pwede rin. Pero mas bet ko ata yung Pascual-Legazpi or better yet, Chua-Legazpi," Louie said in a dreamy tone while giggling at the idea.
"You really have wild imaginations, Chummy!" Raffie commented. "Alam mo namang yung una malabong mangyari yun, diba?"
"Really? Diba ikaw na rin yung nagsabi sa akin nung kararating mo palang dito na you're still hoping that Vince would eventually change his principle about marriage? So what happened? Give up ka na?"
"I hate to admit it, but after almost five months of being apart, hindi ko na talaga maintindihan yung nararamdaman ko. Feeling ko, hindi lang kami physically away from each other, para bang pati yung emotions namin spaced out din. Hindi ko na sya masyadong nami-miss...pero nasasaktan din ako pag hindi sya gumagawa ng paraan para magkausap kami nang mas madalas...naguguluhan talaga ako. And what's worse is that I can't help feeling guilty about it, Chummy."
"Ayan ka nanaman, eh. Bakit, si Vince ba sa tingin mo nakaka-feel ng guilt sa pag-ignore at pag-take for granted nya sa'yo? At saka bakit ka naman magui-guilty? Eh wala ka namang ginagawang kung ano, ah. Well, unless..." Louie purposely discontinued her statement as she carefully observed how her best friend would react.
"Unless what?" Raffie asked, looking quizzically at Louie.
Louie just smiled as she looked at the potted peonies arranged in the garden. Then she faced Raffie and winked at her.
"Don't give me that kind of look, Louie," Raffie warned her friend, already aware about what Louie was trying to imply.
"Mabait sya at mukha namang sincere sya sa intentions nya sa'yo, Chummy," Louie stated.
"What do you mean intentions?" Raffie asked. "Louie, FYI - alam ko 'yang iniisip mo, at mali ka, okay?"
"Is that what you really want to believe, Chummy? Nahawa ka na ba sa akin? Iba kaya yung case ko sa'yo. Besides, ikaw pa nga yung nagpa-realize sa akin na maging totoo sa sarili ko at sa nararamdaman ko, diba?"
"He was offering me a promotion, at dahil hindi ko agad yun tinanggap tapos alam nya na nauna na akong kinausap sa university for a full-time position, he thought of sending me those plants...alam mo na, ganyan ka-in-demand ang BFF mo - pinag-aagawan ng mga employers."
"Wow, that's so humble of you, Chummy!" Louie said with a sarcastic tone. She raised her brow and added, "Alam ko naman na ikaw yung tipo na pag-aagawan ng mga bosses...pero yun ba ang sinabi sa'yo ni Sir Quino? At yun din ba ang nararamdaman mo?" Louie was clearly unconvinced.
Raffie was just silent. She sighed deeply as she looked intently at each of the potted pink peonies nearby.
"Chum, payong kapatid lang...I know your situation's kind of complicated. But please, open your eyes...makikita mo rin kung sino ang sincere sa'yo. And open your heart...malalaman mo rin kung sino ang totoong laman nyan."
(End of Flashback)
Louie closed her eyes and uttered a brief prayer for her best friend. "Lord, just please give Raffie wisdom and discernment so she could finally rise above this confusing situation. Please guide her, Lord...please po."
****************************
'...There's no sense in waiting for the perfect moment. All we have to do is take the moment and make it perfect.'
Raffie's words kept on replaying through Quino's mind all night.
And even as he woke up that morning, those same words immediately escaped from his mouth, making him wonder how he could make the dinner that night a perfect moment.
Just then, a great idea swept through his thoughts. While still on bed, he reached for his phone and dialed his brother's number.
"Good morning, Ahia, sorry...I know this is crazy, but I need your help. May dinner mamaya sa house nila Papa, invited si Raffie...please tell me, what should I do to make our dinner tonight perfect?" Quino consulted his brother in such a blunt way.
"You are absolutely crazy, Bro! I'm in the middle of planning something really important tapos tatawagan mo ako para lang magtanong ng mga paandar para sa dinner?" Raymund exclaimed, sounding really stunned.
He was in Palawan with Kate for their first honeymoon destination. After two days, they will be traveling to a few countries in Europe for about two weeks.
"Sorry, Bro. I just tried to dial your number, nag-ring naman...dapat siguro i-off mo na lang phone mo," Quino reasoned out, smirking.
"Okay, thanks for reminding me. I'll turn it off, then...ngayon na mismo."
"Teka, teka, isang suggestion lang, please naman," Quino pleaded.
"Alright. Mapalad ka pa rin at tulog pa si Babe..."
"Hay, salamat, hindi pa pala nag-re-resume ulit ang aksyon," Quino naughtily commented.
"Loko-loko! Puyat kaya ako," Raymund snapped. "Sige, kahit antok pa ako, eto. Number one: flowers, huwag kalimutan. Number two: syempre sunduin mo sya. Number three: Make sure kasali sa i-se-serve nyo mamaya yung favorite foods nya. Number four: Ihatid mo sya, and finally..."
"Bro, parang ang common naman nyang mga suggestions mo. Wala bang mas unique?" Quino complained.
"Anong magagawa ko, eh yun talaga yung basic, eh...teka, akala ko ba humihingi ka ng payo ko? Well, kung ayaw mo, eh di i-o-off ko na 'to."
"Hey, wait for a sec...I was just kidding, you know...so what's the fifth?"
"Number five - tell her your real feelings, tapos halikan mo sya bago sya bumaba sa sasakyan. Okay, so matutulog na ako ulit, ha? Enjoy your time with her."
"Teka, hahalikan ko talaga sya? Kasali talaga yun?"
"Ano ka ba? You're acting like a naïve school boy, Bro! First time mo ba?"
"Well, I mean..."
"Diba gusto mo perfect? O sya, sige na. Bye na."
"All right...Anyway, thanks for understanding me, Ahia."
"And thanks for not understanding me, bro...teka, akala mo ba libre yan? Sisingilin kita sa takdang panahon."
"What do you mean?"
"You'll find out during your own honeymoon. So make sure you won't forget to turn off your phone when that time comes," Raymund warned his brother jestingly, then he immediately ended the conversation by turning off his phone.
"Si Ahia talaga," Quino muttered as he stood up and placed his phone on his bedside table. Then he opened the sliding glass doors leading to his bathroom and recalled each of Raymund's suggestions, "Flowers...good idea. Sunduin...definitely. Favorite foods...no problem; I'll just have to do my research. Ihatid...dapat lang. Magtapat at halikan...dapat nga ba?"
************************
"Good evening po," Raffie greeted as she saw Vivian and Moira inside the large and stylish receiving area of the mansion. She walked side by side with Quino who had fetched him an hour and a half before the agreed dinnertime.
"Raffie, hija! I'm so glad to see you again!" Vivian exclaimed, immediately giving Raffie a hug. "Halos magkasunod lang tayo ng dating, ah...but Reese isn't here yet. Pati si Andrew, wala pa rin."
"Tita, may dinner meeting po si Papa tonight kaya baka hindi na sya makahabol. Tapos si Reese naman po tumawag kanina, she told me something came up so she can't make it tonight," Quino said. Then, showing the box of cake he was holding, he went on, "Achi, heto nga pala, pinadala sa akin ni Tita Carmi- she baked a chocolate mousse cake."
Moira smiled at Raffie as she took the cake from her brother. "Pakisabi sa mommy mo, Raffie, thank you, ha. O, maupo muna kayo...babalik muna ako sa kitchen para i-supervise yung work doon. In ten minutes, dinner will be served. Excuse me," she said.
"Oh, okay, hija," Vivian said. She took a seat beside Raffie and then turned to Quino, "Tamang-tama at pina-set up ko agad yang magic mic...c'mon, let's sing while waiting for our dinner."
"Sige po, Tita," Quino immediately said. He gave the wireless mic to his aunt who chose a song at once.
...Soft as a rainbow
Like stardust and moonglow
I see the love in your eyes
Like autumn leaves falling
And the first call of morning
It came to my surprise
True love calls just once in a lifetime
Why should we wait
When now is the right time?
Nothing can stop this love we're making
Nothing can stand in our way
Nothing can block this road we've taken
Nothing can stop us now...
At Vivian's urging, Raffie sang along softly, and Quino couldn't help but gaze at her attentively. Her lightheartedness never fails to brighten up his moods.
In fact, just the sight of her fascinating smile was enough to make his day complete. 'I want you to be my girl, Raffie. At gustong-gusto ko nang sabihin yan sa'yo...but how could I do that if you're still someone else's girl?' he thought as he heaved a sigh.
"Aba, hijo, bakit naman hindi mo kame sinabayan sa pagkanta?" Vivian suddenly complained just as the song ended. "Because of that, you have to sing for us whatever our beautiful guest here will request from you." She gave Quino a meaningful look and then handed the mic to her nephew.
With a soft laugh, Quino said, "All right, Tita, no problem...anong gusto mong kantahin ko, Raffie?"
"With a Smile, please," Raffie immediately replied.
"Here it is!" Quino joked as he showed his wide beam at Raffie and Vivian. Then he confidently continued, "Get ready to hear the best version of that song, ladies..."
...Lift your head, baby, don't be scared
Of the things that could go wrong along the way
You'll get by with a smile
You can't win at everything but you can try.
Baby, you don't have to worry
'Coz there ain't no need to hurry
No one ever said that there's an easy way
When they're closing all their doors
And they don't want you anymore
This sounds funny but I'll say it anyway...
"Excuse me, guys," Moira interrupted as she walked inside the receiving room. "Dinner is ready."
"Okay, susunod na kami, hija. Patatapusin lang itong song," Vivian said.
"Pero Tita...bawal po paghintayin ang grasya," Moira reminded her aunt good-naturedly. "And Janna's already waiting in the dining room; she volunteered to lead the prayer before meal."
*********************
Quino smiled, feeling satisfied with the way things have been turning out that night.
Flowers for her. Check.
Fetched her at home. Check.
Her favorite foods served. Check.
He was greatly satisfied when both Raffie and Vivian looked pleased with the foods that were served: from the soup and appetizer to the main dish and the desserts. He was thankful for his Achi's generous help in making sure that his requested dishes would be prepared that night: Vivian's much loved baked scallop and chicken tinola, and of course, Raffie's favorite steamed lapu-lapu and Greek salad.
After dinner, they spent about an hour chatting ang singing in the living room while drinking their tea. Raffie seemed to be enjoying the time until her phone suddenly rang.
She excused herself to answer the call, but when she went back inside, Quino noticed that something about Raffie looked amiss. It was as if the phone call triggered such a sudden change in her mood.
Nevertheless, he observed that in spite of that, Raffie managed to stay in good spirits while talking to Vivian and Moira who were taking turns in sharing about their traveling experiences.
"Naku, medyo late na pala...pasensya ka na, ha," Quino said as he glanced at his watch while driving Raffie home. "Ganun talaga si Tita, mahilig magkwento tungkol sa mga byahe nya. Palibhasa, she can travel whenever and wherever she wants. Single eh."
'Single...' Raffie sullenly repeated the word in her thoughts, gripping her phone tight. 'Single...'
Quino glanced at Raffie who just remained silent. He noticed that Raffie seemed lost in thought. "I guess you've had a long day...you seem really tired, Raffie."
As she heard Quino mention her name, she suddenly realized that he was talking to her. She looked at him and tried to smile, hoping he won't be offended by her inattentiveness. "No, I'm okay, Quino. I enjoyed Achi and Tita Vivian's company," was her brief answer.
But Quino was fully aware that something was bothering Raffie. She was silent all throughout the time they were heading towards her home. And she held her phone and kept on staring at it as if she was waiting for something.
When they finally stopped in front the gate of the Legazpi's, Quino bravely said, "Raffie...is there any problem? Pasensya ka na...kaso, napansin ko lang after the call you seem..."
Wanting to avoid any talk about the call she had received, Raffie shook her head and immediately interjected with a sweet smile, "Ah...yun ba?...actually it was just a little news...from a friend. But I'm okay. Anyway, salamat nga pala sa dinner, ha." She removed her seatbelt and was about to open the car door, when Quino leaned close to her and held her hand at once.
"Raffie..."
With a surprised look, she asked, "Yes?"
"Raffie, I just want you to know that I...I'm your friend," Quino began with a soft and sincere tone of voice. As he heard his own heart starting to beat fast, he went on, "Kahit na kailan lang tayo nagkaroon ng chance na maging malapit, pakiramdam ko matagal na kitang kilala...magaling kang makisama, magaan kang kausap and I...I admire people like you - even-tempered, optimistic, with strong character...and I'm...I'm in awe of such qualities. That's why I can't help but admire you." Then he moved back to his seat and gently removed his grip from her hand.
Touched by Quino's words, Raffie smiled faintly. "Thank you. That's really flattering...hindi ko ine-expect na ganun pala yung dating ko. I mean...hindi pa naman tayo masyadong magkakilala for you to say that. But to tell you the truth, Quino, I may look strong, but I still get hurt, even over small things," she admitted.
Quino smiled warmly. "I understand. Dahil tao tayo, Raffie...vulnerable. We can be sidetracked at times, but if we're strong enough we'll stay levelheaded no matter what. Yun naman ang importante, diba?"
"Tama ka. But for me, it's the grace of God which keeps a person calm and levelheaded. Kung ako lang talaga, hindi ko siguro kakayanin yung mga challenges sa buhay. I just rely on Him," Raffie averred in a voice that was almost in a whisper.
"Yes, I agree...and you know what? God is good not only because we can rely on Him...He's really good because He also sends people to us...people who can lend their ears and stay by our side so we could be reminded that life is boring without challenges."
Although Raffie was feeling rather dreary at that moment, she couldn't help but grin at Quino's witty remark.
"Ganyan nga...do that more often," Quino said, glad to see Raffie's wide smile.
"Ako nagsabi sa'yo nyan kahapon, ah!" Raffie exclaimed, remembering how she encouraged Quino to smile frequently.
"Ganun naman talaga, bawi-bawi lang pag may time," Quino joked. "But seriously, Raffie...if you ever need someone to talk to...andito lang ako."
"Thank you, Quino," Raffie said, now feeling somehow relieved. "Tatandaan ko yan...Good night."
************************
"Two months from now, we'll be fulfilling one item in our bucket list - snuggling together in a gondola while traveling along the Grand Canal. It's a perfect idea, isn't it, Lovey?" Vince asked after he excitedly announced his plans as he Skyped with Raffie later that evening.
He shared his plans of going to Venice with her as soon as he's done taping the first five episodes of the television series in which he's one of the regular cast members. He told Raffie that the cast and crew will be given one week break and he wanted to spend that time with her.
"Yes, it is," Raffie agreed. "But Vince...I'm afraid I have to check on my schedules first...you see, I've just been promoted and -"
"You're promoted? Wow, that's absolutely wonderful news, Lovey! You never fail to amaze me! I'm so proud of you!" Vince exclaimed, interrupting his girlfriend's sentence. "See? That's a great reason to celebrate! You don't have to worry about anything. I'll arrange the trip and we'll stay in Venice for about four days, then we'll go back to the Philippines together so I could spend time with your family. I'll make it up to you, promise."
"Thanks, Vince...But in a couple of months we'll be very busy preparing for our students' first recital...so I'm not really sure if I could take a break in time for the trip you're planning," Raffie explained straightforwardly, feeling rather sorry and upset about the conflict in their schedules.
"So you're saying we can't possibly push through with the trip?" Vince asked, equally sounding upset and looking disappointed with his creased forehead.
"Vince, I'm not saying it isn't possible...I just told you I'm not sure," Raffie replied immediately. "But I'll do what I can to arrange my schedule, all right?"
"Please do that by all means, Lovey. I terribly miss you!"
'You do? Talaga? Bakit hindi ko nararamdaman?' Raffie thought, looking at Vince's pleading blue eyes. 'At bakit hindi mo sinabi sa akin yung tungkol sa sinabi mo sa interview sa'yo last week?'
A feeling of dismay swept through her as she remembered the call she received from Helena earlier that night. She sent Raffie a link to the news article about an interview of Vince during Calvin Klein men's fashion show where he was one of the models.
The article described Vince as the newest young British actor taking Hollywood by storm. But when asked if he was dating anybody, he said that he is currently not in a relationship.
Right after reading the news article, she immediately tried to contact Vince so she could confront him about it. But as usual, he couldn't be reached. She sent him a direct message on Twitter and then she kept on waiting for his reply all throughout the time she was talking to Moira and Vivian, and even while Quino was driving her home. But it was only about midnight when he finally replied to her and asked if they could talk through Skype.
"Vince, you said you're proud of me..." Raffie began, trying to stay calm but wanting to bring up the issue she wanted to hear from her boyfriend.
"I absolutely am!"
"Then why did you tell the press that you're currently not in a relationship?"
Vince's eyes widened instantly. "So you've already read the article," he said. "I thought you'd understand, Lovey. You're the most open-minded person I know, and I expected you would understand my reasons for doing that."
"And may I know what your reasons are?" She asked, wanting to hear how Vince would exactly defend the statement he released to the press people.
"You know I'm in a whole new different world now, Lovey. You know how people in the media make a great fuss over little things. And you know that intrigues are now part of my life. I merely wanted to spare you from all these things," Vince explained, his voice now sounding a little vexed. "I care so much about you and I'll do anything to protect you, so please understand that. Can't you just give me your full support on everything that I do?"
Raffie's eyes narrowed. "I'm sorry if you think I'm not giving you enough support, Vince. But it's you who seem so distant. You know very well I'm not a demanding person; all I want is for us to act upon what we agreed to do just to make this long distance relationship work for both of us," she firmly said, still trying to stay composed.
Deep inside, she felt terribly hurt, but she didn't want Vince to see her cry. "I always try to keep in touch with you, but I can't figure out why you're practically ignoring the efforts I've been making."
"If you could just see my daily schedules you'll know what kind of life I have right now," Vince reasoned.
"If there's a will, there's a way, Vince." Raffie's voice was calm but stern.
"You know what, this isn't the time to argue and point fingers at each other," Vince said, obviously wanting to avoid any conflict between him and Raffie. "It's midnight there and I know you're tired...you need to take a rest...and as for me, I'm still in the middle of a shoot and I'll have to go back to work in a minute. I think it would be best if we'll talk again tomorrow, okay, Lovey?"
Raffie felt deeply disappointed because she failed to hear what she wanted Vince to say.
Without uttering any word, she slightly nodded her head and ended the call. Then she silently broke into tears, feeling as if she was engulfed with mixed emotions of anger, regret and pain.
**************************
ihatequotes™ @ihatequotes 3m
The moment you start taking someone for granted is the moment you start losing them.
Retweeted by RaffiElle
"Just be strong, Raffie," Quino said in a low voice as he stared at the quote which Raffie had just retweeted.
It was already past midnight and Quino was trying to get some rest but couldn't. Whenever he closed his eyes all he could see was Raffie's smiling face.
It was barely an hour since he had driven Raffie home, but he was already missing her. That was why he decided to browse through her Instagram and Twitter posts, just wanting to look at her photos. He was surprised to see that she was online and her retweet seemed to reflect what she was feeling that very moment.
After a few minutes, Raffie posted a photo of a smiley on Instagram, with the caption:
RaffiElle 2m
You'll get by with a smile...
Raffie's IG post gave Quino the courage to send a comment to her:
jqleeChua 1m
@RaffiElle You can't win at everything but you can try...
Several minutes passed, but Raffie didn't post back a comment. Quino thought she was no longer online, but then he wanted to check on her so he tried to dial her number when at last, she posted a reply on IG which eventually led to their exchange of messages:
RaffiElle 5s
@jqleeChua No one ever said that there's an easy way
jqleeChua 2s
@RaffiElle When they're closing all their doors...Girl, I'll stay through the bad times...
RaffiElle 1s
@jqleeChua LSS?
jqleeChua 2s
@RaffiElle Sort of...I didn't finish the song, remember?
RaffiElle 2s
@jqleeChua Oo nga pala...pero bakit gising ka pa?
jqleeChua 1s
@RaffiElle I should ask you the same question
RaffiElle 15s
@jqleeChua I just can't sleep
jqleeChua 2s
@RaffiElle How about a lullaby? Do you want me to sing that song now?
RaffiElle 1s
@jqleeChua How?
Quino wasted no time. He got his guitar and immediately contacted her through FaceTime. As soon as Raffie answered, he flashed a wide smile at her and started to sing -
Lift your head, baby, don't be scared
Of the things that could go wrong along the way
You'll get by with a smile
You can't win at everything but you can try.
Baby, you don't have to worry
'Coz there ain't no need to hurry
No one ever said that there's an easy way
When they're closing all their doors
And they don't want you anymore
This sounds funny but I'll say it anyway.
Girl I'll stay through the bad times
Even if I have to fetch you everyday
I'll get by if you smile
You can never be too happy in this life.
In a world where everybody
Hates a happy ending story
It's a wonder love can make the world go round
And don't let it bring you down
And turn your face into a frown
You'll get along with a little prayer and a song.
(Too doo doo...)
Let me hear you sing it
(Too doo doo...)
In a world where everybody
Hates a happy ending story
It's a wonder love can make the world go round
But don't let it bring you down
And turn your face into a frown
You'll get along with a little prayer and a song.
Lift your head, baby, don't be scared
Of the things that could go wrong along the way
You'll get by with a smile
Now it's time to kiss away those tears goodbye
(Too doo doo...)
Let me hear you sing it
(Too doo doo...)
Quino was thankful when he saw Raffie smiling while listening to his song.
She was still teary-eyed, but the smile on her face somehow gave him the hope that he was able to help her even in his own little way.
***************************