Chapter Fifteen
Zanna’s P.O.V
It’s been a week since the Halloween party and it’s been abit of a crazy week. It was Emma’s birthday the other day meaning that we all had to go out drinking again and such except this time I didn’t get drunk I did have a few drinks but nothing that made me drunk. I learnt from my mistakes after the Halloween party. Loki was grateful that I didn’t get drunk as everyone else got absolutely drunk and we had to take everyone home. That wasn’t fun really as Ryan got really rowdy and tried to start something with Loki but Loki thankfully just ignored him. Other than that I’ve been trying to introduce more Earth things to Loki like gaming, foods etc. He’s not so sure on most of the things but he’s getting used to it.
I slowly begin to wake up and I sense that Loki isn’t next to me like I would have thought that he would be. I turn round in the bed just to confirm it. I turn back around and check the time. What?! How is it half past eleven? I never sleep in this late and I didn’t go to bed that late last night although me and Loki did play dominance for a while. I use my telepathic abilities to locate Loki. He’s in the kitchen. I hope he’s not making an omelette again. I hope that Loki doesn’t mind that I’ve slept along for this long. He could have woken me up though especially as he knows that I don’t like sleeping in for a long while.
I eventually pull myself out of bed and get cleaned up. I get dressed into a pair of black and gold jeans. I then pull a dark purple short sleeved t-shirt with a ‘keep calm and party on’ slogan on it. I find these t-shirts amusing with all their different catchphrases on them. I then put on a normal amount of make-up on then decide to make an appearance before the morning is officially finished.
I head straight out of my room and straight into the kitchen. Apart from seeing Loki I also really need a pain killer as I’ve got a really bad headache. Loki turns towards me when he hears me come into the kitchen.
Loki objects “No Zanna out.”
I jump slightly and look at him while stopping dead in my tracks.
Loki requests “Can you please get out of the kitchen please I want to surprise you with what I’m cooking.”
I notify “Okay but I need a pain killer.”
Loki is by my side in seconds and he looks extremely worried.
Loki asks urgently “Are you alright my love?”
I admit “I’m fine I’ve just got a bad headache that’s all.”
Loki nods and quickly shields his cooking from my view but I can still smell it. There’s some sort of roast meat in the oven but I can’t completely identify what meat it is. But if he wants to surprise me with a meal then I’m happy enough. I quickly grab a painkiller and take a tablet with a drink of water. I’m then ushered straight back out of the kitchen by Loki.
I’ve spent the rest of the day creating music, watching TV or playing games on the desktop computer. I feel rather bored and fed up by the time Loki calls me in for dinner at seven PM. I’m starving as well so I hope it’s nice.
I walk into the kitchen and gasp in slight shock. Loki has put a table cloth over the island and has placed two candles on it. Our starter meal is already out on the table.
Loki asks from behind me “Do you like it my love?”
I smile “I love it Loki.”
Loki pulls my seat out and ushers me to sit. I sit down and Loki pushes the chair in. He then quickly sits down opposite me.
He’s made a prawn cocktail and it looks delicious.
Loki urges “Go on Zanna eat I want to know what you think of it.”
I smile warmly at him then gladly abide by his wishes and have a mouthful of the prawn cocktail. Well his omelette may taste disgusting but his prawn cocktail is to die for that’s how delicious it is.
Loki asks “How is it?”
I grin “It’s absolutely delicious.”
Loki sighs in relief and smiles happily.
I urge “Eat yours then.”
Loki smiles and eats his. I continue with mine until its all gone. Loki quickly collects the bowls and places them in the dishwasher. I’m glad that he’s finally getting used to using modern earth devices such as the dishwasher, the oven and the hob.
Loki checks the timer then sits down. I can tell how stressed out he is.
I request “Loki don’t look so worried... you don’t need to try and impress me.”
Loki looks relieved and he smiles happily.
Loki asks “So how are you feeling my love?”
I reply “happy and hungry... What about you?”
Loki smiles “I am happy as well.”
I grin “Well I’m glad.”
Loki wonders “I’ve heard of your Father but you’ve never said anything about your mother.”
I sigh then notify “I think she died when I was a child.”
Loki asks “You think?”
I admit “We had a fight then me and my father moved away... I think she was killed.”
Loki comments “I’m so sorry Zanna.”
I smile weakly “No need to apologise Loki... So what’s your family like?”
Loki snaps “My family are a bunch of lying people who have lied to me my entire life.”
Loki carries on ranting about his troubled past and I can see and sense how angry he is becoming. His past seems to be even worse than mine actually it is worse than mine. I get out of my chair and walk over to Loki. He is seething with rage. I shouldn’t have asked him about his family as I did kind of know some things about it. But even so I didn’t know that it was this bad.
Loki stops talking and looks at me. I don’t see love or even happiness in his eyes all I see is pain and anger. I pull him into me for a hug and he returns it.
I whisper in his ear “I shouldn’t have brought it up I’m sorry.”
I can feel Loki slowly beginning to calm down in my arms which I'm happy about.
Loki notifies “Do not apologise my love you were not to know... It is I who should be apologising for I have obviously allowed my anger over my past to get the better of me.”
I kiss Loki on the lips to silence him.
When I pull away I comment “Don’t apologise either Loki you haven’t done anything wrong in my eyes.”
Loki smiles lovingly then gets to his feet to dish up the rest of the dinner as the timer has just gone off. I decide to help as I don’t like sitting around when I could be helping. I don’t mind when other people do it but I just can’t stand doing it myself. Loki objects at first but gives in when I argue back.
We sit back down and begin to eat. Loki has made a roast dinner as I had suspected from this morning when I smelt it cooking. The meat is beef and it tastes amazing. I mean it tastes like it’s come from a five star restaurant. He’s made roast potatoes, Yorkshire pudding and a wide selection of vegetables. So far it’s a heavenly meal.
Loki asks “Why were you so persistent on helping me?”
I notify “I can’t stand it when I'm made to sit around when I could be helping out I don’t mind when other people do it I just hate doing it myself.”
Loki smiles “That’s very kind of you.”
I comment cheekily “Aren’t I always so kind, aren’t I such an angel.”
Loki scoffs “Yes a devil in disguise as an angel.”
I grin “Point taken.”
I continue to eat the delicious meal that Loki has spent making for most of the day leaving me without his touch to soothe my already irritated wolf. God knows why she’s irritated but she is irritated and spending a whole day without being calmed by the touch of her supposed mate has made go into a slight frenzy. I still haven’t explained the mating thing to Loki yet have I but then again who knows what the future will hold for us. I hope that it’s something good I can’t deal with anything bad to be honest I've had too many bad things in my life already.
After awhile of silence I ask “So how are you finding it? Living here with me?”
Loki admits almost immediately “I love living here with you my love as I love you like I've never loved before in my whole entire life.”
I smile “I'm glad to hear that.”
Loki asks “And you? How are you finding living in my company?”
I comment cheekily “It has its perks.”
Loki raises an eyebrow suggestively “Oh really how so?”
I notify “Bedroom life is much more interesting now that you're here to share the experience.”
Loki laughs then asks seriously “Seriously my love do you like having me here?”
I ask “If I didn’t do you think I would keep my mouth shut about it?”
Loki comments “No you wouldn’t.”
I smile “Then there you go I love having you living here with me as I love you also.”
Loki grins happily and I can see his cheeks turn red. He tilts his head away from me to try to hide his blush. I think its cute how he tries to hide his blushing even though it is so obvious that he is blushing.
I continue to eat for a few minutes finally beginning to feel uncomfortable with the candles. Wolfbloods don’t like being near fire and I'm actually surprised that I've lasted this long with fire near me especially as my wolf isn’t exactly calm at this minute either in fact I think she is acting weirdly odd as she is almost seething with pent up anger at something I do not know what. I seriously don’t see why she's so angry. I’m not going to say anything about the candles though well not unless Loki actually asks me as too why I'm constantly staring at the candles and probably why my eyes are wolf. My eyes would be wolf because of the fire not because of my wolfs anger. Luckily only god knows what would happen if Loki knew that my wolf was angry at something and that I’ve needed his touch for a while and even though I needed it I’ve never said anything to him about it. I'm sure he’ll be a little bit annoyed at that actually.
As if Loki has somehow read my mind which I know that he can’t do because I would have felt it he asks “Why are you staring at the candles like so?”
I admit begrudgingly “I’m not good around fire... it’s a Wolfblood thing.”
Loki blows the candles out and smiles warmly at me. I return the smile then notice that we’ve ran out of wine.
I notify while getting up “I’ll just grab another bottle of wine.”
Loki stares after me while a look of longing and lust plastered across his face. If this is anything to go by then I’m guessing that my wolf will get the touch she's been craving for the past seven to eight hours. As I bend to grab another bottle of wine I feel my shirt begin to ride up my back and probably exposing my scars. I hope that Loki doesn’t see them. Although I'm actually surprised that he hasn’t seen them before as he's seen me naked god knows how many times.
Loki asks “Zanna where did you get those scars?”
I stand up and whack my head on the roof of the cupboard. I curse silently and hold my head. Loki is by my side in seconds trying to hold me up. Protective little thing he is.
Loki asks “Are you hurt?”
I reply in a reassuring voice “Yes I’m fine no injury.”
Loki leads me back to the table the wine bottle forgotten.
Loki asks “Where did you get those scars Zanna?”
I notify “I’d rather not talk about it.”
Loki asks but this time in a more demanding voice which has my wolf growling her disapproval which takes me by surprise abit considering that she's always growling in approval of Loki even when he tries to order me around “Where did you get those scars Zanna?”
I shake my head and tears begin to threaten to spill out of my eyes like waterfalls. I shall not cry over my past. I shall not cry over my past.
I admit quietly and sadly “I can’t Loki.”
Loki asks “Why not Zanna...? What happened to you?”
I snap “I was a part of a Wolfblood pack alright and can we just leave it there.”
I know he won’t leave it there his curiosity will take charge here as I know that he wants to know everything about me but this is something that I don’t want him knowing about only a few people know about how I got the scars on the lowest part of my back. Only Emma, Anna, Poppy, Nick Fury and the pack know about how I got those scars. Even Nick Fury won’t say anything about it knowing that I would most likely hunt him down for saying anything about it.
Loki asks “What did they do to you?”
I begin to let my tears fall and I cry “I cannot tell you Loki I don’t want to relive those memories... I cannot relive those memories.”
Loki looks like he's about to argue his point but before he does I breakdown into hysterical fits of tears as the memories I’d tried so hard to lock away in the back of my mind return.
I was fourteen years old when the pack leader first saw me as a threat to her leadership. Yes I was feisty and yes I do have an alpha wolf inside of me but that doesn’t mean that I would ever want to make a challenge against my alpha female. But she didn’t see it like that she thought that I would challenge her for the right of alpha female. She challenged me fully knowing that I wasn’t old enough to do the challenge and going against one of the only Wolfblood rules that there is. No one under the age of eighteen should ever compete in the right of challenge for alpha. I was four years out of it and I had no interest in being an alpha as I thought it was too much for me to worry about as I also didn’t want to be responsible for all the other wolves in the pack. I was abit lazy back then. I had very little training in wolf combat but even so I was quite good. I hadn’t even finished growing which made matters worse.
When it came to the challenge day I held out for about twenty minutes before my mother distracted me. The alpha had made a deal with the alpha female. I don’t know what she got out of the deal apart from a broken marriage and a very unstable daughter even though she never saw me again after the challenge. Well she did for about five minutes before I was made to leave the pack. Anyway the alpha bit me on the back drawing out a lot of blood in the process. She had pinned me to the ground by my lower back. If it hadn’t been for my father then I would most likely be dead as my father had changed into his wolf and forcefully made the alpha get off of me. I was cast out of the pack. My mother did try to reason with both of the alphas but it was no use. I refused to talk to my mother after that. I still don’t forgive her to this day. My father left with me leaving my heart broken mother behind. She had wanted to come along but my father had yelled at her saying that she wasn’t fit to be my mother or his wide anymore. We never looked back. The wounds that the alpha made formed into scars. It’s a constant reminder of what happened to me even though I can never forget what happened to me.
Loki suddenly pulls me into his chest for a hug. This manages to calm my wolf down slightly. I lean into his chest while burying my face into his chest.
Loki cries softly “I'm sorry Zanna I didn’t know that it would cause you so much pain.”
I cry “You weren’t to know Loki.”
Loki notifies “But I was the one who pushed you for answers that you're obviously not ready to give nor think about.”
I nod and cry for a few minutes longer in Loki’s arms before I eventually look up at Loki’s face. His eyes are red and puffy a tell tale sign that he's been crying or still is for that matter. Loki looks down at me and we lock eyes. Loki leans down and kisses me passionately. I return the kiss almost immediately. He licks my bottom lip begging silently for entrance into my mouth. I let him slip his tongue into my mouth and I take in his taste and scent like I usually do. His taste is spicy yet sweet and his scent is feisty and vibrant. We quickly get lost in each other me more than him I think as his scent and taste swirls around my senses. If I’d ever marked him I'm positive that this would have sparked off the imprinting. I don’t even sense S.H.I.E.L.D’s approach until it’s way too late to do anything about it.