Brook’s POV:
It turned out that camping was fun.
When we’re reached the camp, we’d found a load of tents all in a large circle. Two man tents, girls to the left, and boys to the right. Of course, Larissa and I had decided to share.
As the day turned to night, they set up a camp fire around logs, which we used as a bench and we ended up roasting marshmallows on a stick – thankful not a stick off the ground- and told ghost stories. It was really childish, but really fun at the same time.
As the ‘party’ continued, I found my gaze was drawn more and more to Jack and Katie, where they sat, away from us, but still in our direct line of sight.
In the end, I made up a lame excuse and slipped away, just needed to walk and be alone for a while, to clear my head and get a grip on my own, stray emotions.
I found a calm stream and I sat on a rock for a while, torch in hand as I watched the water run its rapid course, the sound calming and the sight one of such tranquil beauty.
Knowing the others would freak out if they realised I wasn’t in my tent, I began heading back towards camp. I knew the way, because I hadn’t wanders too far, knowing that will my luck, I’d get lost and no one would even realise until it was too late.
“God, yes, kiss me there!” my eyes shout up from the ground as the moan filled the space around me.
My legs seemed to lock and my breath rushed out of me as if someone had punched me full force in the chest.
Jack bent his head and sucked the skin of Katie’s neck like a starved wolf. Her hands fisted in his hair as she arched herself against him and moaned, riding his thigh as she did so.
I took this in within seconds and I felt sick.
“Shit,” Jack’s eyes met mine and suddenly regret was shining in them.
“Ah, you’re little sister find you,” Katie teased, “it doesn’t matter, baby, she was just leaving,” Katie said dismissively.
Tears burnt in my eyes but I wouldn’t cry, not in front of them, I wouldn’t let her see me like this. Yet I couldn’t seem to pull my gaze from his.
His eyes pleading with me to forgive him, my breath hitched and he pulled away from Katie, taking a step towards me.
“Brook,” he said now, but I couldn’t do this, couldn’t stay and listen to whatever lies he wanted to spurt, couldn’t listen to him right then because I was so fucking close to tears and the pain in my chest hurt so much. It felt as if someone was putting more and more pressure on me and it was getting harder and harder to breathe.
Without a word, I turned and took off, the tears spilt and I let them, knowing no one would see.
“Brooklyn!” Jack called after me, but I was already gone. Vanishing into the darkness as I dropped my torch and forced myself to run harder, faster, I just needed to get away; far, far away.
I ended up back at the stream I had found earlier. I don’t know how I got back there and I didn’t care.
Stumbling, I reached out and caught myself on a tree. Breathing heavy, I closed my eyes and forced myself to calm down.
“Brook,” his hand touches my arm and I jump, startled at his sudden presence.
He’s holding my torch in one hand as he steps closer to me, touching my chin gently as he looks at me face. I know he can see the tears, but I don’t care.
“Brook, I’m sorry, I never meant for you to...” he started, but I pull away.
“Don’t touch me,” I said now, crossing my arms over my chest and holding myself away from him.
“Brook, please,” Jack whispered now, “you weren’t meant to see that,” he added and I turn to look at him, anger burning in my eyes.
“What, so seeing it makes a difference?” I spat now.
“No, I just,” he shook his head as he closed the distance between us, “I can’t get you out of my head,” he admitted softly and I want to hug him. I want to tell him I know what he feels, but I can’t.
“You stink of her,” I force the words out and he flinches back, “I feel sick,” I whispered now.
“Brook?”
“You make me feel sick,” I rip my arm from his touch, “am I just some sort of game to you? Is that it?” I laugh, but there’s no humour in my voice.
“Damn it to hell, Brook, you know I... you mean more to me than that,” he said now, but he kept his distance from me and it both calmed and pained me at the same time.
“I can smell her all over you... why don’t you just go fuck her and be done with it,” I snapped and he shakes his head.
“I don’t want her,” he muttered, before turning his back to me and walking over to kneel by the stream.
Cupping a hand full of water, he splashed his face and I suddenly realised what he was doing. He was washing her scent off.
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Jack’s POV:
Standing back up, my heart feeling as if it were breaking in two, I turn back to her.
She’s just standing there, looking so lost and scared. I want to reach out to her, but I know I can’t and it kills me.
Taking a few steps towards her, I look into her eyes and I can’t help but hate myself. Guilt heavy on my shoulders, but I deserve it.
I should never have kissed Katie, I should never have made that choice to use her, because I’d hurt the one person in this world who I’d never mean to cause harm to.
“I’m sorry,” my voice sounds rough, my words meaningless, I know because I know Brook. An apology is just words, meaningless, useless words.
She’d never trust me again, never be able to feel for me the way she had, I had screwed it up, and even though I should be somewhat glad that she might now be able to move on, I wasn’t.
Because if I was honest with myself, I was too selfish to want her to forget about me, I was a bastard because I wanted her to love me when I knew she never could, not after this.
“It’s none of my business who you choose to date,” she muttered softly, her voice breaking as she shrugged.
“That’s a lie right there and you know it,” I muttered and she looked at me her eyes beginning to burn with anger.
“Fine, then why? I mean, do you like her, like kissing her! After everything, why her?” she bit out.
“Because she was there! Because I was a fucking coward, but don’t you think for one second I liked it,” I snap now.
“You seemed to like it fine ten minutes ago,” she laughed in anger, in sarcasm as she breathed hard.
Did she really believe I wanted Katie? Did she truly think that when I was with Katie, I wasn’t thinking about her!?
“Every time I touched her, I wanted you. Every time I kissed her, I wished she was you!” I snapped angrily.
I hated myself, every second I had spent with Katie. Her touch made me feel sick, her kiss revolted me. I didn’t know what the hell was happening to me, but all I could think about was Brook.
“I watched you look at us and I could see the pain hidden in your eyes and it was killing me,” I admitted softly, “I don’t know why I feel like this about you, I just do... but the look in your eyes when you seen me with her... I’d die before I ever had to see that look in your eyes again,” I shoved my hand through me hair, completely confused.
“You swore to me, you promised me you wouldn’t get back with her. You lied. You said all those things to me that night and I just, I believed you!” she cried out, “And then in the cafeteria, the way you spoke to me, the things you said and then suddenly, you’re all over her!”
“I was angry, Brook, I didn’t know what to do!” I said now, “This, what I feel for you, it’s wrong and yet I can’t seem to make myself stay away from you. I thought, for one stupid second, that if I was with someone else, I wouldn’t feel this way about you, but I do, I still do and I don’t know what to do!”
“Fucking her wouldn’t have helped!” she snarled and I looked at her.
“I didn’t have sex with her, Brook!” I snapped now, angry that she’d even think I could ever have sex with another woman... but then, I shouldn’t even be thinking about making love to Brook.
“Yeah, sure. That a few minutes ago was just a heavy make out!” she spat.
“Damn it to hell, you can’t stand there and accuse me of making a fucked up decision when you did exactly the same thing with Rick!” I snapped
“Me and Rick have been together for months!...” she started, her eyes still shining with tears and it took everything in me to not move closer, to not go to her and take her in my arms and hold her to me.
“Do you really think that lie is gonna wash with me!?” I asked now, laughing without humour as I looked at her.
I knew she’d started dating that asswipe because she had thought the same thing I had, if we were in a relationship with someone else, our feelings towards each other would change, but quite frankly, they didn’t change fuck!
“Give me some fucking credit! Every time I see him touching you, kissing you, I feel like killing that bastard! He has no right to touch you!”
“He has every right, he’s my boyfriend!” she defended, her eyes blazing with heat.
Something in me snapped then, because she wasn’t his, would never be his!
“You’re mine! Not his! He may be your boyfriend, but you don’t love him! He can’t have you!”
“And what, you can? I’m not yours, Jack, I never was,” she whispered shaking her head as her eyes fill with more tears as she turns away from me.
Reaching out before I can think about what I was doing, I grab her wrist gently but firmly, stopping her from walking away from me.
“No, that’s where you’re wrong, Brook. You were mine the second your lips touched mine and I somehow ended up being yours.”
And without thinking twice, I take her lips with mine.
I needed her to know she was mine. I needed her to see that I was hers, not Katie’s, never Katie’s. Only ever hers.
“No... I can’t do this,” she whispered now, her hands fisted in my T-shirt as she gasped for breath.
“Baby,” I said softly, resting my forehead against hers.
“Why does it hurt?” she whispered tearfully and I closed my eyes, understanding what she meant, “Seeing you kiss her like that... it shouldn’t hurt, but it does.”
“I know, I’m sorry, I’m so sorry,” I said gently as I wrap my arms around her. Needing her to feel ok, to not hurt; I had caused this pain, it was my fault. I had done the one thing I had tried to prevent, I’d hurt her.
“What’s wrong with me, Jack?”
“Nothing is wrong with you, Brook,” I said now as I cup her face gently in my hands and look down at her, “nothing is wrong with you,” I promise.
My eyes fall to her lips and it takes everything in me not to lean down and seal mine to hers.
“We can’t do this,” her words cause my eyes to lift back to hers and she watching me silently, fighting against the swirls of emotion that are wanting our lips together, our hands on each other.
I swallow hard, looking at the curve of her neck and wanting to kiss her, feel her skin under my lips the way I had dreamt of doing every night for so damn long.
“It’s wrong,” but her chest is heavy and her hand is curled into my T-shirt tightly.
“I know... I just can’t seem to help myself,” I whispered as I dropped one hand to her waist, while the other curled around the nape of her neck and I stepped closer to her.
“Jack,” she whispers and my willpower crumbles around me.
“Shit,” growling in the back of my throat, I crush my lips to hers in a desperate need, as I pull her closer to me and she wraps her arms around my neck, her mouth opening for me.
I hear her moan gently, and I can’t stop, I need her, want her, now, right here.
I press her back up against a tree as I tilt my head and deepen the kiss. Sinking into her mouth as my tongue coaxes hers.
Breaking my lips from hers, I took her neck in a searing kiss that had us both moaning.
My hands travelling over her as I felt her curves and all I can think about was her. My Brooklyn.
“Oh god, Jack,” she gasps gently, pressing herself up against me and it was only then that I realise my leg has slipped in between hers and I was rubbing my thigh against her core.
“W-we can’t do this,” her voice husky and her eyes burning with passion as she pulls away from me a little.
But I can’t think. I’m burning with an almost painful need to feel her, to kiss her, to call her mine.
“We already are,” I ground out as I take her lips in mine once more.
Her kiss is hungry as she jumps and I grip her waist as she wraps her legs around me. God, she is so beautiful.
Our kisses hungry, our bodies burning against each other in a hot inferno of need, so hot I don’t think I’ll survive it, but I don’t care, because all I care about, all I’ve ever wanted is right here, in my arms.
If I died in that second, it wouldn’t matter, because in this split second of time, surrounded solely be trees and darkness and creatures that would keep our secret silently, all that matter was her.
She’s everywhere, her scent filling my lungs, her hair brushing my arm as my hand knotted deep in the beautiful mass of silky brown hair; her breast rubbing against my chest, making me groan, her crotch rubbing against my groin.
I want her.
And then sense, for a split second of time, for a tenth of a second, it clears in my head.
She was worth more than this, she was everything and damn it to hell, but I couldn’t hurt her like this, not again. It was wrong.
Pulling back, I somehow set her feet back on the ground and step back; a short distance between us and either of us spoke.
We look at each other silently, as if understanding exactly what the other was thinking.
“We can never do this again,” she whispers suddenly.
“I know,” I agree and she nods softly.
She turns and starts heading back to camp, her torch in her hand, but I can’t let her leave, not yet.
“I won’t touch her again,” I promise into the silence and she pauses. Does she believe me? I mean it; I won’t touch Katie or any other woman again. I couldn’t, not after feeling her under my hands, not when she held my heart so securely in her hands and she didn’t even know it.
She was the only one I would ever want.
She left without a word a second later and I stand there for a long time, before self hatred wells up inside of me, guilty, shame, anger, pain.
“Fuck!” turning, I slam my fist hard into a tree, the pain in my knuckles easing the pain inside of me away just a little, enough for me to breath, enough for me to head back to the camp and slip into my tent without anyone noticing me.
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What are your feelings towards Jack and his behaviour?