I’m actually surprised at how many of you were mad at Dominic. Wow. I’m shocked. In the last chapter I heard opinions from some of you guys that I didn’t even know was reading this story, so that was great and amount of comments really surprised me. I didn’t respond back because I wanted your opinions and feelings and emotions to be fresh and untainted by anything I would’ve said. So here goes.
DOMINIC’S
The view was impeccable. In the midst of dusk, The Eiffel Tower looked golden, thanks the lights. It seemed literally within my grasp, but I knew if I reached out I wouldn’t be able to touch it. Still, I imagined I could. The sky had a blue glow that was embroidered by spots of silver known as night clouds.
I’ve never stayed at this hotel before but I had heard of it and this room that came with the magnificent view. When I learned Rye was half French and he spoke French, I imagined taking him here. I imagined walking with him as he experienced the beauty of Paris and everything they wrote and spoke about this amazing city.
There was a knock on the door, frightening me and effectively brought me out of my reverie. My heart thumped faster in my chest as I made way to the door. Taking a deep breath, I opened the door.
“You’re here,” I said, surprised. I thought it was room service but I was hoping it was him. With tears streaming down his face he nodded furiously, unable to meet. “Does this mean that—” before I could finish he started nodding again. “And you’re going—” Again he started nodding.
He started sobbing. Not able to stand looking at him crying anymore, I pulled him into my arms, wrapping them around his waist. He quickly wrapped his arms around my neck, hugging me back.
“I’m so sorry,” he said, sobbing harder.
“Shh, shh, shh,” I cooed. Trying to calm him down. “Let’s move on, alright?” I felt him nod against my neck.
“Do you still love me?” I laughed. I couldn’t help it.
“Why do you think you’re here? Of course I still love you. I can’t just stop loving you like that.” His response was tightening his arms around me. I’m going to die from suffocation.
Flashback
I stopped paying attention to my phone a long time ago. I’m surprised my ears hadn’t started bleeding from hearing Oh My Goodness by Olly Murs over and over and over. Eventually I put my phone on silent. I couldn’t turn it off because of work. As much as I’m used to the silence and being home alone by myself the silence felt awfully aberrant.
I got no sleep. I stayed up thinking about the voicemail Orion sent me. I hadn’t expected him to react like that. Honestly, I didn’t think he would care. I thought he would go to Nick’s and wait for me to call. I’m not mad at him anymore but I’m still hurt.
He would still be acting like he couldn’t give a damn about me or us if I hadn’t been so pissed and said all that I had. Deep down I wish he had realized on his own and apologize then. Not after we had a huge fight like that.
Sighing, I got out of bed, stripped out of my boxers and got in the steaming hot shower. A lot had happened before our argument that Rye still didn’t know about, like my movie deal, the release dates of my books. I haven’t told him anything to be honest. It was hard for me to be open with him when every time we were having a conversation I felt like I was talking to another person. I didn’t feel the connection that I felt when we just met where we would talk for hours about any and everything. That was the best part of whatever relationship we had. We barely knew each other and yet we shared so much.
I sighed again, tucking the black dress shirt into the grey pants I was wearing before putting on the grey jacket that went with it and brown boots. After grabbing an apple from the kitchen I made my way to the publishing house for the first printed copy of both books. I had a brief meeting about the scheduling for upcoming events. The one I was looking forward to most was the Q&A for copies before the release date. There will be ten giveaways so ten lucky people will read the second installation before anyone else. It’s months away but that’s the only thing I’m looking forward to right now.
After the meeting I took the first copies with me. My father didn’t know but I decided to revive our old traditions and hand him the first copies. He thinks we’re just having lunch, which has become a regular thing for us. Lunch with my father has become the most promising, uplifting, positive thing in my life. Who would have thought? Certainly not me.
There was a jewelry store I remembered that wrapped gifts. I used to know the owners quite well but according to the new owners they sold the business. I couldn’t let anyone outside of my family and close friends see the books yet so I had to buy a gift bag and gift-wrap tissue paper. Something gold caught my eyes as I was catching out—a watch. I liked watches and I liked giving my friends watches. My father and I had many traditions, like every couple years I’d give him a new watch. He only ever wore the watches I bought him and I remember being baffled one day after realizing he still wore the same watch many years after I had given it to him. I thought it was outdated and got him a new one. He never stopped wearing the first watch until the screen cracked even though he had a new one he never touched. It was irreparable. It was time for a new watch.
I gathered up my purchases then thanked the elderly Asian woman and went to my car where I neatly placed the books in the gift bag, covering them with the paper to hide the contents and made it look good. The bag and the expertly wrapped Rado Men's Integral Goldtone Steel and Black Ceramic Quartz Watch sat on the passenger seat as I drove to the restaurant.
The first thing I handed my father was the box with the watch. He knew what it was right away and started laughing.
“I stumbled and broke the last one you gave to me two years ago in Germany. I looked at so many watches and for the life of me I couldn’t purchase one.”
“Now you have one.” I said. He smiled and patted my hand thankfully. Sometimes words aren’t enough so why even attempt to say anything when just a look or a small gesture sums up everything up.
I rubbed my hands together and smiled at the plate of quesadilla and guacamole. Spanish food. Oh yeah!
“I have something for you,” I said after swallowing down a mouthful of yumminess.
“What?” He asked, shoving his big finger and thumb in his mouth to get rid of the sauce from the short ribs he was having. He groaned, “I miss food like this.” Reaching underneath the booth, I searched with my hand until I felt the gift and placed on the empty space of the counter. “More gifts?”
I shook my head. “It’s more of…I don’t know. I thought it’d make you happy and I really wanted to do this.”
The confusion on his face was the funniest look I’ve seen on him in a long time. It wasn’t just confusion though, it was mixed with curiosity and happiness.
Upon opening the bag and removing the papers, his hand immediately went over his mouth and he held his head down. The emotion was just streaming off of him as he picked up the cloth napkin and held it over his face. His shoulder shook visibly and I felt my eyes burn with hot tears from watching him tear up.
It took him a few minutes to compose himself before he pulled the books out of the bag and began reading the informational section on the back.
“A Lost Man,” he read a loud. “You’ve never written an LGBT book before.”
“I know; you don’t have to read it I just wanted you to have it.”
“Oh I’m going to read it,” he assured me. “And I can’t wait to read the Sequel.” He set the books back in the bag before taking a deep breath and looking me in the eyes. “Thank you so much, Dominic. I can’t begin to tell you how much this means to me.”
“You’re welcome.”
We left the restaurant soon and I was waiting for the valet to bring my car around my father tapped me on the shoulder. “I can’t help but notice your eyes are a little sad. Everything okay?”
“Uh, not really?”
“You and Orion?” I nodded. “Is it bad?”
“A little.”
“Can it be fixed?”
“Yeah, we’ll be fine with a little time.”
“Alright, if you need anything I’m just a phone call away.” I nodded as he turned around, only to stumble a bit after bumping into someone.
“Mr. Valentine,” shocked laced her voice. I looked around my father to see Zoe looking at him.
“You’re all grown up,” he said, hugging her. She hugged him back and as she pulled away her eyes caught mine. She looked away as if I wasn’t even there.
“Hi,” I said being the adult. My father gave me a knowing looking before saying bye to Zoe and getting his car and driving off.
“Hey,” she mumbled. Bland as fuck.
“How have you been?” Just then Zac walked out of the corner store. He looked good and by good I meant clean and drug free. “Hey, Zac. You look…well,” I said, stretching the word as I looked at Zoe.
“Yeah, thank you. I’m clean now. I’ve been clean for a month.”
“Well, congratulations and I’m happy for you. I hope you stay that way.”
“Thanks bro, looking forward to the sequel, by the way.”
“Valentine’s day next year,” I told him. “Keep a lid on it.”
“You got it.” I haven’t been this pleasant with him for years. It was kind of nice. “I’ll give you guys a minute.”
“Zoe, Zac’s clean. It would have been nice to know that you got him help. I thought you would’ve said something about getting him help like I told you to.”
“That’s how it goes then? You have the say in how our friendship works. I needed you and you turned your back on me!” People were staring. I mean, it wasn’t like we weren’t in the middle of the block arguing or anything.
“I’ve always been there for you. I’ve always supported you while you catered to his addiction and I couldn’t do it anymore. I thought our friendship meant that much to you that if I threatened it you would see the error in what you’re doing. I’m glad that Zac got the help he needed. I’m disappointed that after everything we’ve been through together our friendship didn’t mean anything to you.”
I at least expected her to say something but I didn’t even get a peep out of her. I laughed and got in my car. I’m not even going to sweat it. I’m so sick and tired of putting so much effort in maintaining my relationship with everyone. No one makes any effort. No one cares. No one is more fed up of being fed up of being disappointed by everyone.
***
Over the next couple days being pissed at Zoe didn’t help the situation between Orion and I. As much as I wanted to talk to him and tell him how upset I am over Zoe I couldn’t. The whole thing just made me even more pissed off.
One thing was obvious was that I missed him terribly. I found myself sitting on his bed staring at nothing in particular. I wish he had quit that fucking job when he moved in. If he had we wouldn’t have been where we ended up and he would be here with me. Everything would be imperfectly perfect.
I blindly reached for my phone on the bed before unlocking it. As expected I had an amount of missed calls from the one number. A stranger looking at my phone would assume I had some sort of obsessive stalker. But it wasn’t, it was the love of my life finally opening his eyes.
Putting in the password for my voicemail, I took deep breath and put the phone on speaker to listen:
“I miss you so much.”
“I’m sorry.”
“I love you.”
The last voicemails were the ones that had me tearing up:
“I miss you.”
“Can you please answer the phone?”
“What the fuck Dominic, I’m trying to apologize and you’re not talking to me!”
“I’m sorry. I didn’t meant to yell…It’s just…I’m…I don’t know what to do. I’m really sorry, baby, I’ll do anything you want to fix this.”
“I never realized how much I needed you until I’m losing you. I haven’t lost you, have I?”
My eyes were blurry as I made my way to the closet where his suitcase was. I started packing the necessary clothes I knew he would need. I packed his passport and social and everything else I knew he would need also.
I’m not quite ready to see him or speak to him yet and the only way to tell him what I had to was through a video recording.
“You said you’d do anything to fix us,” I said to the camcorder. “I want us to work, I really do. There can’t be an us as long as you’re working at Silk. I want you to go to school for culinary like you dream of doing. For us to work out and for you to come back home you have to quit Silk and apply to college. You’re really smart and knew that long before I found the paper with your SAT scores a few minutes ago. I feel like every time you’re at Silk you’re with someone else when you should be with me. I hate that feeling. I have business in Paris; I’m leaving tomorrow. If you think you can make this sacrifice for us, I packed your passport. Your flight leaves in two days and I’ll be waiting in Parish for you.”
End Flashback
A/N
I bet you guys were confused as fuck when you read the first part. Hehe.