It’s been five weeks since I got the piercing and I-don’t-know-how-many weeks since I met Wanda and Natasha. By now, it feels almost natural to have them in my life. Sometimes more sometimes less, depending on how busy we all are.
It’s been also six weeks since I last had sex with any of them and I’m starting to feel it. Before the piercing we’ve had sex regularly, which heightened my sex drive. Now that we don’t have sex anymore, I am left wanting and impatient.
They are patient about it, telling me they rather want to play it safe and not risking my piercing getting infected. Which I get, but it doesn’t make sense all the way. We could have sex without the piercing ever being touched but they don’t seem to want to risk anything. That’s what I’m trying to tell myself. When I lay in bed at night, other thoughts occupy my mind though. Thoughts about if they don’t want to have sex with me anymore. If they don’t like the piercing and find it off-putting. And the scariest at all: if they don’t want to spend time with me anymore.
We’ve seen each other a few times in the past five weeks but not nearly as often as before that. Sure, work is busy and all but that doesn’t mean we can’t see each other anymore. A thought that came along with that, is if they just liked me there to have sex with me.
The thought hurts me and I try to convince myself it’s not true. We shared moments that didn’t involve sex at all, moments that meant a lot to me. But now I can’t help but wonder if that was just part of the whole thing. If you want someone to trust you, you can’t just have sex with them, there’s more to it than that. There are conversations, calm moments, intimate moments that have nothing to do with sex. A relationship needs to be built up and that’s what happened.
We just never really talked about it and now I’m starting to feel insecure about the whole thing.
I don’t regret it, not at all but it does hurt me a little to think there is nothing more to this than sex. They are married and have each other to fulfil all their needs. All the romantic stuff like going on dates, slow dancing to songs, kissing in the rain, experiencing unconditional love, they have each other for. They don’t need me for that.
Technically, they don’t need me for sex either but I could tell it turned them on when I was having sex with them. I don’t want to think they just used me because they are too kind for that, but I do think they don’t need me in their relationship. They had a working marriage and have been happily together for ten years before I came into the mix, they can be perfectly happy without me. I will just be the odd one out as they have each other to rely on and to be there for romantic stuff.
Thinking like that hurts but this kind of insecurity has been brewing inside me for almost five weeks now and I don’t know what to do about it. Confronting them about it feels wrong. They have every right to be all lovey dovey with each other and I can’t expect them to treat me as if I was a part of their marriage because I’m not. We never declared what we are or what we will be. We just lived in the moment.
I can’t blame them for getting me involved, I agreed to it myself and making them feel bad about it now wouldn’t be fair towards them. They have been very open about this whole thing and never made me feel like I was just there to spice up their sex life. I’m responsible for my own feelings and I don’t know how to handle them.
I also know, I can’t go there and expect from them to make me a part of their relationship. That’s not how it works. They are married and a team for so long now. I can’t decide to join them, they have to ask me. I’d say yes in an instant if they asked me but they haven’t and I doubt they will. Not with how things are at the moment. Five weeks ago, I would have been sure, it could happen. Now I’m not.
But I don’t want to sit around and mope, I want to go out and have fun and forget about my worries, even if it’s just for a night.
I call up one of my friends, asking if she has someone she could set me up with. She’s always very good connected and sometimes it feels like she knows every queer woman in the city.
I tell her, I’m just looking for a date right now, not necessarily a hookup. Despite being needy, even though I took care of my own needs multiple times, I don’t want to sleep with someone else at the moment. Not until I have my shit figured out. Which might take a while but until then I have a loyal companion in my bedside drawer.
Pov Wanda
“She’s not answering.” I say, staring at my phone, worrying my bottom lip.
“Give her time, you only texted her like five minutes ago.” Nat says, walking by me and pressing a kiss to the back of my head.
“Ten minutes.” I correct, resting my elbows on the kitchen counter before me. Natasha is currently cleaning up a little but I’m not in the mood to help her. Which she doesn’t complain about, never has.
“Right.” Natasha replies, putting away the plates she got out of the dishwasher.
“She could have plans, you know? It’s Saturday afternoon, people tend to have plans then.” She says, which makes me glare at her. An irrational bit of jealousy overcomes me. Of course, y/n can have plans on a Saturday afternoon, but I’d rather if they were with us.
“She won’t sit around all day and wait for one of us to text her.”
“Would that be so bad?” I ask, following my wife with my eyes as she puts away more dishes.
I know the answer to my own question, which is probably why Nat only gives me a look and not a verbal answer.
Of course, I can’t expect y/n to do that, it would be unhealthy if she did. But I am a little disappointed she isn’t answering. Nat and I wanted to go out to a café today and I thought it would be nice to have y/n with us, spend some quality time together because that has fallen short lately. I’ve had a lot of cases to work through and a handful of trips I had to take. Natasha had some busy weeks too, often working all evening to get something done.
There are these phases when our jobs get busy but we always manage to still find time for each other. Which is easy, since we live in the same house but with y/n across city, it’s a bit more difficult. Asking her to come over to cuddle and just watch a movie and then send her home again feels wrong. Having her here in the mornings is great but with how busy it has been, our mornings were rather stressful and I don’t want to pull y/n into that.
I miss having her around more often and I wish, she would live closer.
“Maybe she’ll answer while we’re on our way and we can still invite her.” Natasha suggests, wiping her hands at a tea towel before coming over to me. She stands directly behind me, her arms wrapping around me. I lean back into her embrace, watching my phone again.
“What if she doesn’t?” I ask back.
“Then you will have to put up with just me.” Nat replies, kissing the back of my head. I sigh.
“Sorry, that’s all I can offer.” She says sarcastically and I am quick to spin around on my stool to look at her.
“You are more than enough.” I assure her, placing my hands on her waist and looking up into her beautiful green eyes. The eyes I fell in love with ten years ago and that I fall in love with every day new.
“I just miss y/n.” I admit, leaning my head against her chest, listening to her heartbeat. She waves a hand gently through my hair.
“I miss her too.” She says with a sigh. Natasha will always be enough for me but I got so used to y/n, that it’s starting to get difficult to imagine a life without her. I know what it was before her and it was great, we were really happy, y/n just brought an extra portion of happiness into our lives and I don’t want to miss that.
“I want her to be ours.” I sigh, looking up at Nat.
“She’s still not a dog we can just adopt.” She replies, making me swat her butt lightly.
“You know what I mean.”
Nat nods, looking thoughtful. Obviously, this would be a big step to take, and not just for the relationship we have with y/n but also in ours. I never thought it would actually come this far when I walked into that bar all those weeks ago but it has and I am happy about how things turned out.
“You want us to be a throuple.” She states and I nod, slipping my hands into the back pocket of her jeans. My plan wasn’t to have this talk today or in the middle of our kitchen but I knew it would happen at some point.
I know, Natasha likes y/n as well, even if she wouldn’t have told me that, I saw it in the way she treats y/n. The image of them on our couch five weeks ago won’t leave my head. Y/n’s upper body naked, the piercing still new and Natasha holding her head in her lap, caressing y/n’s skin. It was a picture of pure trust and contentment. Natasha isn’t like that with many people, mainly only with me and now with y/n. There was a comfortableness in their actions that screamed feelings and relationship. And I know, my feelings for y/n are just as strong.
“I do. It wouldn’t change anything about our marriage, you’d still be my wife and it wouldn’t change how much I love you. There’s just another person in my heart now that I love too.” I explain, even though I probably don’t have to. Natasha will always stay my first great love and my forever person. My feelings for her won’t ever lessen, no matter who else is part of our relationship. I just love her way too much for that.
“It wouldn’t change anything between us.” She agrees, her hand waving through my hair again. I’m glad we are on the same page in that matter. We will still be us. Nothing and no one can change that.
“It would only change our relationship with y/n.” I confirm, already smiling a little at the idea. This isn’t a decision to make lightly, there are a lot of people who could get hurt if this doesn’t work out but I want it to work out. Natasha and I can still share moments between the two of us, even if we take this next step with y/n. But so can Natasha and y/n and I and y/n share moments together and we can also share them between the three of us.
Natasha and I trust each other and know each other. There is no jealousy when we spend time with y/n separately. There might be a bit of jealousy during a threesome sometimes but not in a way that would destroy anything. More in a way that makes it hotter.
“You want her to be our girlfriend.” She says out loud and just at the term, I smile. Being able to call y/n our girlfriend would really make me happy and proud. I know, we would give her everything she could ever ask for, in every possible sense.
“I do.” I agree. There is no assurance that she would say yes but I strongly believe she would. I understand that she hasn’t taken the step yet, understand that it’s our job to take that step because we are married and we invited her into our relationship. And I am ready to take that step. It took a while, a long while even, but I wanted to be completely sure and I am now.
“I do too.” Natasha replies, her eyes soft and bright. I grin and slip off the chair to kiss her, excited about this decision.
“When do we ask her? I feel like we should wait a little longer. Take her out on a date or two maybe. So far, we’ve only ever been here, at her apartment or in the office. I want her to know we are comfortable with her entering this relationship and telling the outside world. She deserves to be swept off her feet. As great as the sex with her is, we should put effort into wooing her to show her it's more than just sex.” Nat suggests and I nod in agreement. I never felt like this was just about sex but I get where she’s coming from. We should show y/n that we’re not afraid of showing us to the outside world and that we stand by what we do in private. There’s just one more thought.
“What about your job reputation?” I ask with a frown.
“What about it?” Nat asks back, her fingers trailing over my back. It’s such a natural action by now but still makes my heart miss a beat every now and then.
“Could it suffer if we come out to be polyamorous?” I wonder. I’m not embarrassed about it or think it's bad or weird, but I know a lot of other people have very loud opinions about it. Nat shrugs.
“Possibly, but everybody who talks shit will be fired. They can’t take my job away, my company is way too successful for that. It would be a huge minus and downfall for the economy in this city if everyone decided they hated me.” She says nonchalantly and somehow, that turns me on. Natasha is never arrogant, she knows what she has though and knows her value, which has always been sexy to me.
“So, there are no problems, right?” She asks and I nod, smiling. There are no problems.
“I thought, maybe we can wait until our anniversary to ask y/n. This way we could all share the anniversary together and she wouldn’t feel left out. We still got our wedding anniversary and it will stay that way.” I suggest. Nat considers that for a moment before nodding.
“I like that, it’ll feel more inclusive then and we won’t have to leave her to sit around when we celebrate the anniversary. But I agree, the wedding one will stay ours.” She replies, linking her hands behind my back. I pucker my lips and receive a gentle kiss. Our wedding will always stay our wedding but that doesn’t mean we care about y/n any less. Sharing our anniversary with her will be great and will feel natural easily.
“Glad we talked about it.” I hum, twirling one of Nat’s red locks around my finger.
“Could you tell me again, how you’d fire people if they talk bullshit though?” I ask, not quite able to keep my voice from dipping low. A smirk forms on her lips and she walks me back, making sure not to hit the stool. My back meets the edge of the counter and I look up at her.
“I will fire everyone who talks bullshit over us, over your or over y/n.” She tells me in a husky voice that sends shivers down my spine. I’ve always been a sucker for her impact and power from her job. Of course, I don’t want her to fire people who don’t deserve it, but it is hot to hear what she can do.
“Yeah?” I ask, holding on to the small of her back.
“Mhm. I am the CEO after all.” She murmurs against my lips, letting her hands drop to my thighs. In one swift motion, she lifts me onto the counter, the cold marble against my bare thighs makes me gasp.
“Glad I’m not your assistant anymore then.” I tease, parting my legs for her so she can step closer.
“Are you now, Ms. Maximoff?” She asks in a low voice that has arousal shooting between my legs.
“Yes, very glad, Ms. Romanoff.” I husk before gasping when she pulls me into a hungry kiss.
******
Summer has definitely hit the city and walking outside feels like mild torture sometimes. Despite wearing a loose dress that allows air to circulate over my skin, I am feeling hot. The only thing that doesn’t bother me is Nat’s hand on my waist though. It may be hot but I will never deny her touch. She went for something casual as well, just some shorts and a blouse that makes me stare at her chest when I don’t control myself.
The city is buzzing with people, most of them in short clothes too and either eating ice cream or sipping on drinks. It’s nice to just stroll around and not have any destination in mind. We will sit down in whatever café has free seats for us.
“Did I get a new message?” I ask Natasha, stopping so she can take a look at my phone. This dress doesn’t have pockets and I wasn’t in the mood to wear a handbag with me today. Nat pulls out my phone from her pocket and unlocks the screen. Our wedding photo shines up at me, making me smile. Even after seven years of marriage, I couldn’t find it in me to change my home screen. My lockscreen varies but never my home screen.
“No new message.” Nat informs me, tilting the phone in my direction. I sigh and nod, accepting it. Y/n can have plans today and those plans don’t have to be with us. Still, I’m a little bummed out to be honest. We wouldn’t have asked her to be our girlfriend today but with the knowledge that we’ll ask her very soon, I was just excited to see her.
“Thanks for checking, Tash.” I say, hoping my disappointment doesn’t lace too much through my words. But of course, she notices it and puts her arm back around me, kissing my cheek.
“She’ll answer at some point today and maybe we can ask her to hang out tomorrow then.” She suggests and I nod, starting to walk again.
Tomorrow is as good as today but with everything we settled on, I really wanted to see her today. It’s fine though, I will just enjoy the day with my wife.
We manage to find a café. It’s small and tucked into an inner courtyard. There is shade all around, making it seem like an escape from the heat. We find a free table outside and get comfortable.
Nat looks through the menu while I look around. I’ve never been here but I like it. It has a cozy vibe to it and is a lot calmer than the cafés at the main streets. If their coffee is good, we will definitely come back.
My eyes stop on a person that’s sitting with their back to me. Their brown hair falls freely over their shoulders and onto the back of the t-shirt. I know that head of hair, I know who it belongs to. Or am I seeing things because I want y/n to be here, to spend the afternoon with us?
On the other side of the table sits a woman about her age with dark hair and a caramel tan. She’s pretty and somehow, that makes me feel irrationally jealous again. Y/n is allowed to be outside with other people, obviously. She has friends she hangs out with and it never bothered me. But something about this picture makes me feel suspicious.
A waitress comes to take our order but I only listen halfway, my eyes still on y/n’s back. Nat orders for me as well before placing her hand on my arm, catching my attention.
“What’s up, what are you looking at?” She asks, a small frown on her face.
“That’s y/n over there.” I say and nod into the direction. I don’t want to point, that’s rude and would pull attention to us that I don’t want. Tasha turns her head to look into the direction. Maybe I am just imagining this and y/n isn’t really sitting there.
“Huh.” Tasha makes, turning back to me. She doesn’t tell me I’m wrong, so I know she saw y/n too. We spent enough time with her to recognize the back of her head outside in a café and having my suspicions confirmed feels good, less like I made it up.
“Maybe we can go over there after having a cup of coffee and say hello.” Nat suggests. I hum, narrowing my eyes to watch the other woman throw her head back with a little laugh, placing her hand on y/n’s arm. Heat shoots through me and I place my hand on the table, palm up. Nat looks at me and raises an eyebrow.
“I’ll call y/n.” I explain, wiggling my fingers to get my phone. But instead, she puts her hand in mine and gives it a squeeze.
“I understand that you’re jealous, babe, but you can’t act like a possessive girlfriend. For one, you are not her girlfriend and secondly, it’s not fair towards her. She can go out with her friends and not tell us. It’s understandable that she doesn’t pull out her phone while being with her friends. She pays full attention to them, that’s what we like so much about her.” Natasha reminds me softly. I frown, feeling a hint of a pout forming on my lips.
I always tended to get jealous, it’s a trait I don’t like about myself but I can’t control it. With Nat as my wife, I have no need to be jealous, she promised to love me forever and is wearing a ring that emphasizes that. But before that, I tended to get jealous a couple of times. She never minded very much and after she checked on me and we had a short talk to make sure we’re both okay, it always led to sex. One of the few times she lets me dominate her was when I was jealous.
She didn’t complain when I restrained her to the bed and made sure she only knew my name by the end of it. That was a great night and I am very tempted to do the same with y/n right now.
But Natasha is right, I am not her girlfriend and I should not act like a possessive bitch. So, I take a deep breath and nod.
“You’re right.” I agree and lean back, my hand sliding out of hers. Natasha has always had better impulse control than me and sometimes has to look out for me in that way. But she always says she doesn’t mind at all.
On the other hand, I am the person who urges her to be a little less intimidating sometimes because she tends to put on her most CEO-like face when we are around new people and that scares some of them. We work as a team and it work’s great for us.
Still, I keep my eyes on y/n around three tables down from us. Tasha doesn’t comment on it and just sips her iced coffee while happily eating the cake she ordered for us. Usually, we either talk while being out like this or are both silent and just enjoy the moment. It’s important to be able to be silent with one another. But this time, I am simply too distracted to concentrate on anything but y/n. I am jealous and I can’t turn it off. But I can decide not to act on it.
That is until the other woman smiles at y/n and leans forward. It looks like she’s about to kiss her, which makes me want to storm over there. But she pulls away, nodding with an understanding expression.
Did y/n say something or give any other indication that she didn’t want to be kissed? Or did I miss the shaking of her head. Either way, I am glad she didn’t kiss the other woman because that would not have been healthy for the burning knot in the pit of my stomach.
“Calm down, baby. You barely touched your coffee.” Tasha says, pulling me back to reality. I look at her, finding her frowning with a slightly concerned expression on her face. I try to wave it off but know my own face is betraying me. I take a sip of my iced coffee that is watered down by now but I don’t care much for that.
“I think she’s on a date.” I state, crossing the arms on the table before me. A flash of jealousy shows on Natasha’s face and she glances over to the table with y/n. I knew, I’m not the only one who doesn’t like this.
“What?” She asks, looking back at me. I nod, understanding a lot more of the body language of the other woman. The only thing I don’t understand is why y/n would be on a date. Sure, we never made it exclusive in that way but still.
Dating means she’s looking for someone in a romantic way and I was convinced, she already found that in us. A bit of insecurity laces through and I swallow, not liking that at all. It tames the anger but doesn’t make the jealousy go away.
Now I want to make her scream my name even more.
But I know, that’s not how it works. If there is an issue here, we should talk it out and not fuck it out. Even if the second option seems like a lot more fun. But difficult conversations are part of every relationship.
“She’s on a date with the woman at her table.” I state, trying to sound calm, which I am not. But I know, we have to talk about it and approaching this with anger will do no good.
“Okay.” Nat replies, blowing out a breath, looking helpless for a split second before she catches herself. When it comes to dating and feelings, her mask of the confident, all-knowing CEO slips because that’s something she can’t control. People either have feelings or they don’t.
“What makes you think that?” She asks, keeping her eyes on me but I can tell she wants to turn around and look for y/n.
“For once the try of the woman wanting to kiss y/n and then the fact that she looks like she’s flirting the whole time. Leaning in, touching her arm, laughing.” I list off, pressing my lips together. Most of that doesn’t have to mean they are flirting, it could be friendly but with the almost kiss, it is very much not just friendly. Nat hums, seeming less relaxed than before and I get it.
“We should talk to y/n about this.” She decides. My eyes dart to her, leaving y/n and the woman alone for a moment.
“She’s been kind of distant lately, which worries me. I don’t know what it is and I want to know. Maybe I’m just paranoid but it feels that way. And I don’t want miscommunication to end what we have going on. Not after we decided to ask her to be our girlfriend today.”
I nod in agreement. Even with my jealousy making it a little hard to stay rational, I know y/n wouldn’t lead us on to drop us again and I know there is something behind her actions. She has feelings for us, that much is obvious in the way she looks at us and acts around us. Losing her over something like this would truly suck.
“But we should wait until she’s done with her date.” Nat says, pulling a grimace at the word date. Glad to know I’m not the only one who hates this. But I guess, it’s y/n’s choice if she wants to date other people, not ours.
“As long as they don’t leave together.” I mutter, taking a sip from my coffee. I can be patient, sometimes, and I can act civil but if she leaves with the other woman, I’m not sure that will continue to be the case today.
Leaving together often means going home to someone and that often leads to kissing and sex. Just thinking about that makes my blood boil and I have to take a deep breath. I have no ownership over y/n, obviously, so I should calm the fuck down.
Natasha and I continue sipping our coffees and eating the cake but there’s a tension in the air that even a cooling breeze can’t whisk away.
My eyes dart to y/n every few minutes, checking on her and making sure we can catch her before she leaves.
Finally, the other woman gets up and they hug before she leaves.
Y/n looks down at the table in front of her for a second before pulling out her phone. This is our chance.
A/n: Some drama to keep it interesting and a bit of Wanda's pov.
Thanks for reading and love to you all <3