Amara- now
Christmas faded in quick.
It's been 2 months since I asked Gio for a divorce. I haven't seen much of him but I take comfort knowing that he's never far, I know he watches over the house in the night.
"Miss Ricci." Our maid comes into Gio's office.
"Hm?" I ask looking up from the computer on Gio's desk. I'm breaking into his calender to see where he is right now, I need to talk to him.
"The Christmas decorations are up." She tells me.
It's Christmas in three days and I haven't put up a single decoration. I normally would, I love celebrating Christmas with just Gio but now he's gone I haven't had it in my heart to decorate.
"Thank you." I smile at her before turning back to Gio's computer.
Looks like he has a last minute meeting in his office, so that's where I'll catch him.
I head out of Gio's office and upstairs to top up my makeup, ringing Dom whilst I do so.
"Mrs Moretti." He's the only one that refuses to call me Miss Ricci, thinks we're getting a divorce for all the wrong reasons a me until I give him a real reason, my married name it is.
"I'm leaving in about ten minutes to head to Gio's office, can you have the car ready?" I ask.
"Sure thing." He ends the call.
Once I make sure my makeup and dress look good, I head out to meet Dom.
****
"When they told me my wife was here, I thought it was Matteo playing some sick joke." Gio say's waltzing into his office.
I'm sat in his chair, reading through our divorce file that's been sat here collecting dust. It's exactly the same it has been since I gave it to him.
"Not Matteo." I say looking for Gio's signature "Although, I have been told we look alike." I add.
"Matteo is no where near as beautiful as you are." He says coming over to his desk.
He takes his stance, on the same side of the desk I'm on, except he's leaning on it with his arms crossed looking at me.
"You haven't signed this." I tell him putting it down on his desk.
"I've been busy." He lies.
"Why are you dragging this out?" I ask, looking up at him.
"Why are you wasting our time together on this?" He asks.
I shake my head.
We've been having this argument for months, I don't have the energy to have it anymore.
I don't say anything and so thankfully he changes the subject.
"What can I do for you?" He asks, glancing from my heels to the top of my head.
"My parents are coming into town, they're spending Christmas with us?" I tell him. I hope he sees where I'm going with this so I don't have to spell it out for him.
"I thought you blocked them?" He asks.
"I did. Matteo told me they're still coming." I tell him.
"Right." He nods slowly.
I don't want to spell this out for him.
"I was just wondering, if you wanted to, can we just pretend in front of them while they're here. I can't tell them this." I say and glance down at both my engagement and wedding ring.
I still wear them all the time.
I then glance to Gio's hand, his wedding ring is also on his finger.
"Sure." Gio agrees straight away.
"Are you sure that's okay?" I ask.
"Absolutely." He says standing tall.
"I'll stop by and move some stuff back in tomorrow to make it look like I still live there." He leans down to me but stops about half way, realising what's happened.
"Sorry." He stands straight and walks round to the other side of the desk.
"I should go." I stand and head over to his door.
"Amara." He calls as I reach for the door handle.
I already know what he's gonna ask.
"Don't ask, you already know the answer." I tell him before quickly leaving.
The question- do I miss him?
The answer- of course I do.
****
My parents are unpacking in the guest room and Gio and I are stood in the living room, in front of the fire.
"Do you think they know?" I ask twisting my rings.
"No. You're just paranoid." He puts his arm around me, this is too comfortable.
"Amara." My mom says walking into the living room.
We both turn to look at her.
"Spero che inizierete il Natale con qualche buona notizia." She says reaching out to put a hand on my stomach. I hope you're starting off the Christmas with some good news.
I bite my tongue.
Don't argue.
"Mama non posso farlo, non sono incinta." I say squeezing Gio's hand. Mom, I can't do this. I'm not pregnant.
She gasps and looks down at my stomach.
"Sei ingrassato." She leaves the living room and I glance up at Gio. You have put on weight.
"Why are you letting her say that to you?" He asks.
I shrug not really knowing what to say.
"She's so rude, and you let her." He says.
I shake my head, not wanting this conversation and head into the kitchen where Matteo, Rosie and Rocco are.
Rocco is on edge he hasn't seen any of our parents since he killed their brother, aka his father.
I don't think they'll stay that long.
"Hey." Rosie smiles as I come into the kitchen.
I smile back and then glance over at my mother who is talking to my brother, in Italian, about Rosie funny enough.
Rocco is also listening, his jaw is tense.
My mom says something about her being not Italian and Matteo just rolls his eyes at her.
"Who cares?" Matteo sighs.
"These are really good." Rosie says snacking on some chocolate covered pretzels.
"Thanks." I tell her with a smile.
I don't quite catch what my mother says, but I do catch the change in Rocco's demeanour.
Rosie grabs his hand and stops him from doing anything to insane.
"It's okay." She tells him.
He looks at her and she gets what he's saying because she gets up and leads him out of the kitchen.
Gio comes to my side, doesn't leave it.
He's good like that.
I start making some drinks for everyone, Gio is stood beside me, offering up his help.
"Hey." Rosie comes back into the kitchen.
We all turn to look at her, me Gio, Matteo and my parents.
"You okay?" I ask and she nods.
"We're actually going to go." She tells me.
"It was so nice to meet you." She says looking at my parents.
No it wasn't.
"No it really wasn't." Rocco shouts from the hall.
Rosie goes red and comes over to give me a hug.
"I'll see you later." She says and then hugs Gio before hugging Matteo.
Rocco waits for her by the entrance to the kitchen. She slips into his arms, she does quite often, and they leave.
I knew they wouldn't stay long, hell I don't blame them.
If I could leave I would.
****
"I love your dress." Gio says as I slide into the chair beside him at the table.
"Thank you." I smile and squeeze his hand before reaching for my glass of wine.
As we start eating dinner, my mom and dad start whispering to one another.
I catch eyes with Matteo who looks so fed up with the pair of them.
I'm just waiting for it.
It comes half way through the main course.
"Gio don't you think it's time to find someone who's going to actually get pregnant. It's okay to have a mistress." My dad says to him.
Wow okay.
Gio doesn't say anything, he looks likes in shock that they've just said that to him.
"I love your daughter and I will never love her or use her for a child. There any many ways for us to have a child that isn't pregnancy." Gio says grabbing a hold of my hand.
He's reassuring them as well as he is me, as if saying it to them will make the divorce harder.
"Your wife should be able to carry a child." My mom speaks up.
This is awful.
I look to Matteo, begging for him to make them stop, like I always do. They listen to him, not me.
"And where does it say that?" Gio asks more sternly now, getting annoyed. "Because it sure as shit doesn't say that in our wedding contract." Gio argues.
I've only seen Gio argue with my parents once before, he tends to just stay silent with me. They're the only people he won't argue with.
"Are you going to let him talk to us like that?" My mom asks.
"She is." Gio argues, standing up now.
"You come into our home, and you say the fucking nastiest shit I've ever heard to her and except us all to just let you." Gio defends.
Oh wow.
I forgot how hot he is.
Somewhere between all the trying and failing I forgot why I love him and how well he ticks all my boxes.
"You are blocked for a reason, you shouldn't be here. The fact that you didn't check with us, you just showed up and expected us to host you is unbelievable." He argues.
"Then after showing up you sit in front of us and belittle her and tell me that just because she hasn't had my child yet I shouldn't love her?"
"You're both a joke and you need to leave." Gio tells them.
Everyone looks at me and I nod.
"Is this what you want?" My father asks me.
"Please leave and don't come back or try to contact us." I tell them.
They look between one another.
"I don't want you to be my children's grandparents. If you're so disrespectful to your own daughter and I don't want to know how you'll treat our children. When we have them, you won't know and you won't be involved." Gio takes my hand and leads me out of the kitchen and up to our bedroom.
He shuts the door and I move over to my bed and put my head in my hands.
"How do you feel about what happened? Are you okay with what I said?" He asks leaning down in front of me.
"Thank you." I nod.
I take my head out of my hands and move them to around his neck.
"It's alright, mon coeur." He kisses my check and wraps his arms around me just as tightly.