Twenty-seven weeks since Lee's death.
Alex pushed the cart down the aisle. When she had agreed to come with Ryan, Colby, and Jimmy on a supply run in town, she didn't realize that would turn into a morning-long affair. But here she was, pulling five cartons of milk into her cart.
"See, I would have just gotten one," Jimmy stood beside her.
"Why one?" Alex asked.
"Because I just need one," Jimmy shrugged.
"But, Jimmy," Alex shut the freezer door. "There's like... twelve hands on the ranch. Don't you think they'd want milk too?"
"That's why you're with us," Ryan walked up, placing five loaves of bread in the cart.
"Yes, because my nursing degree is really being put to good use right now," Alex smirked.
"You never know," Colby walked up with cans of vegetables. "Might have a spill on aisle nine."
"What else is needed?" Alex asked.
"Think that was it," Ryan looked at the list. "That and two new tanks."
"Those we get at checkout," Alex nodded, pushing the cart forward.
The men followed her into the checkout line. As Alex glanced around, she saw most of the people in the store eyeing them. Ryan must have noticed Alex because he nudged her shoulder to move forward.
"What's wrong?" Ryan asked her.
"They're staring," Alex looked over her shoulder at him.
"They always stare," Ryan shrugged as the others emptied the items onto the conveyor belt.
"Why?" Alex asked.
"The brand," Ryan said.
Alex looked forward and pushed the cart to the end of the line.
**
"Tell me again how you got twenty-two splinters in your back?" Alex asked Colby around si or so that evening.
"I don't want to talk about it," Colby sighed.
Alex pulled the last splinter from his shoulder.
"There," She said. "I think that's it."
"You all better baby?" Teeter walked into the stall. "Momma's sorry for riding too hard."
Alex's eyes widened as Colby stood up, buttoning up his shirt. He looked at Alex with an apologetic smile.
"I don't wanna know," Alex held up her hands.
"What?" Teeter asked. "You ain't riding your mad like that?"
"Riding my..." Alex shook her head. "Teeter, he had twenty-two splinters in his back. That's not pleasurable!"
"Ain't it though, baby?" Teeter blew a kiss to Colby.
"No, it's not," Colby sighed and walked out of the stall.
Teeter followed but stopped and looked back at Alex.
"Keeps 'em coming back though, don't it?" She winked at Alex before walking off.
Alex shook her head as she cleaned up her supplies and put everything away for the day. She heard heavy footsteps and glanced behind her to see Kayce leaning over the stall door.
"Hey," Alex shut one of the bins and walked over to him, grabbing her jacket. "How was your day?"
"Fine," Kayce tilted his head and kissed Alex. "Better now."
"What happened?" She asked him, pulling the stall door.
Kayce stepped aside and let Alex walk out. He reached down as they left the barn and laced their fingers together. She smiled, swinging their hands back and forth to try and make Kayce smile. It ended up working after a few seconds. Alex stepped up and gave him a sloppy kiss on his cheek.
"You're in a good mood," Kayce looked at her.
"Why would I not be?" Alex asked with a smile.
She stopped walking, making Kayce turn around. The sun was setting, the sky behind him a dazzling array of pinks, yellows, and oranges. His eyes were lazy now as he looked down at her, his hands coming to hold her hips.
"What happened?" Alex asked, resting her hands on his arms.
Kayce took a deep breath, his eyes looking out over the land as he thought for a few moments. He finally looked back at Alex who was waiting patiently.
"Just one of those days, baby," Kayce said. "Good didn't seem to win today."
Alex softened her look. She could have asked for more from Kayce. She could have pestered him to tell her exactly what had gone wrong. But he looked tired and Alex didn't feel like adding to his list of things that weren't good today.
"Well, let's see if we can't make today end with some good?" Alex stepped around Kayce, holding her hand out for him to take.
She led Kayce straight upstairs and down the hallway to the bathroom. Ale leaned over the tub and started the hot water flowing. She pulled out the one salt bag Kayce didn't seem to mind and poured some into the waters. She swirled it around with her hand and leaned back up.
Kayce was watching her from the doorway, leaning against it with his shoulder. She turned around and smiled at Kayce. Alex held eye contact as she reached down and pulled her shirt over her head, letting it drop on the floor. Kayce's eyes stayed glued to her as she undid her jeans and pushed them down her legs. Alex turned around, reaching behind her to unclasp her bar. She looked over her shoulder at Kayce.
"Are you gonna join me or just watch?" She asked.
A minute later, Kayce was leaning back against Alex in the tub. The warm waters soothing away the day he had. Alex massaged her fingers into the skin around Kayce's shoulders. She could feel the knots in his muscles.
Kayce's fingers danced along her legs under the water. His thumbs rubbed circles around her ankles. Alex leaned her lips down to press a kiss against Kayce's neck.
"Feel good?" She asked him as her nails scratched along his back.
"Yeah, darlin'," Kayce leaned his head back against her shoulder and closed his eyes.
"You've got knots," Alex sighed as she tried to work one along his shoulder blade. "A lot of stress back here."
"Can't imagine why," Kayce snorted sarcastically.
He grunted as Alex pressed firmly down and rubbed back and forth. A few seconds later and the knot subsided.
"There's one," Alex reached both her hands down Kayce's chest, her finger tips dipping below the water.
They laid there for a few minutes. Alex thought back to her morning at the store.
"Kayce?" She asked.
"Hmm?" Kayce opened one eye and looked at her.
"We were at the store earlier," Alex said. "Me and some wranglers...and I noticed people staring at us."
"Staring?" Kayce opened his other eye to look fully at Alex. "Did you know them?"
"No," Alex shook her head. "They went...they were just looking. But when I asked Ryan why, he said they're staring at the brand."
"Brand?" Kayce eyed her.
"None of us had Yellowstone shirts on," Alex shrugged. "Or we had coats on I guess so I didn't understand why he said brand when they couldn't see the brand."
Kayce didn't say anything. Alex then moved one of her hands until it covered Kayce's brand. She could feel his heart pick up slightly under her fingertips.
"But I think this brand was the brand he was talking about," She blinked back at him. "And I think it's known even when it's not visible...I'm starting to really understand all of it now."
Kayce leaned up to where he was sitting in the tub. He turned to the left so he could look at Alex better. Her hands moved with his adjustment so she was now resting them against the middle of his back.
"It means different things to different people," Kayce said.
"I'm sure," Alex nodded.
"You know why I have mine," Kayce cleared his throat. "Different people have it for different reasons. I think what it represents, that's what outsiders see...even when they don't see it. Does that make sense?"
"In a way," Alex said. "They were looking at me though...like I was one of yall."
"You are, baby," Kayce smirked. "Or does being naked with me in the tub not count for you?"
"No," Alex let out a laugh. "I guess I felt...I don't know, I felt like I did belong with them. It was the first time I felt that way before."
"You do belong," Kayce reached up and cupped her cheek, his hand wet from the water but warm.
"No, Kayce," Alex leaned closer to him. "I'm trying to tell you that your...girlfriend feels like she belongs here, with everything that sometimes makes here a little complicated."
Kayce blinked a few times before it fully registered with him. Alex watched a smile grace his lips.
"Good," Kayce pulled Alex closer toward him, pausing before their lips met. "Wasn't sure where you were going there."
"Did you think I'd ask you for a brand or something?" Alex giggled.
"I ain't branding you," Kayce rolled his eyes. "Not with that brand at least."
He kissed her, but Alex pressed gently against Kayce's chest and leaned back.
"So with another brand?" Alex raised an eyebrow at him.
"You've certainly had marks from me before," Kayce smirked.
"Oh..." Alex felt her cheeks heat up. "Those brands."
"Yeah," Kayce stood up from the tub.
The water ran down him as Alex looked up. Kayce held his hand out and helped her stand up as well. Once she was upright, Kayce wrapped his arm around her.
"C'mon," Kayce stepped out of the tub. "I'll show you what I mean."
**
Alex yawned as she walked into the bathroom the next morning. She grabbed her toothbrush and toothpaste before brushing her teeth. Her eyes looked into the mirror and headed her brushing. Alex turned her head to the side and saw a maroon bruise over her pulse point in her neck.
She reached up and ran her finger over it. Alex rolled her eyes as she got ready for the day. Kayce had left earlier, Alex was surprised he didn't wake her but sometimes he was stealthy. She had just finished buttoning up her jeans when Beth knocked at her door.
"Morning," Alex smiled.
"Morning," Beth glanced around the room. "My brother gone already?"
"Left earlier," Alex nodded. "I didn't even hear him."
Beth nodded, leaning against the doorframe.
"Something on your mind?" Alex asked, pulling a green sweater over her plain T-shirt.
"Do you ever think about children?" Beth asked.
Alex blinked in surprise. She adjusted her sweater, killing a few more seconds of time.
"In what way?" Alex figured that was a safe way to ask.
"In any way, I suppose," Beth's face was neutral.
"Well..." Alex sighed. "I guess I do? Maybe sometimes...but I'm still not sure what you're asking."
"Do you think about having children?" Beth blinked at her.
"Sometimes," Alex shrugged.
"Does Kayce make you think about having children?" Beth continued with her questioning.
"Well," Alex felt awkward. "I would say yes since he and I are...together."
Beth didn't say anything.
"Did something happen, Beth?" Alex asked.
"No," Beth shook her head. "I just...was curious."
Alex knew about Beth's past and what had happened to her. Lee had told her one night during their own conversation about children. Lee and Alex had only talked about children once. He never wanted kids, he didn't want that responsibility in this life but he also didn't want to leave them the mess which was going to be left to him.
"How many?" Beth asked.
"Pardon?" Alex came back from her thoughts.
"How many children do you want?" Beth asked.
"Oh, I don't know," Alex shrugged.
"If you had to choose," Beth nodded.
Alex blinked back at her.
"I'd be happy with one," Alex said. "No more than two...I guess."
"You think you and Kayce will have a kid?" Beth asked.
"Beth..." Alex sighed.
"Just a question," Beth said.
"A personal one," Alex raised her eyebrow.
"Did you and Lee ever talk about kids?"
Alex figured Beth would go there. Even when Beth was caring, she would step over that line. Alex swallowed harshly, shifting to her feet.
"Lee didn't want kids," Alex said softly.
"Sounds like him," Beth smiled. "But you did."
"I don't know if I did," Alex sighed. "But when your partner says they don't, it sort of decides for you."
"Maybe," Beth shrugged.
"Why the kid talk, Beth?" Alex asked. "What happened?"
Beth looked like she wanted to say something but stopped herself.
"Just curious," Beth turned and walked out of the bedroom.
**
Her conversation with Beth bugged Alex for the rest of the day. It was still in her mind when Kayce walked up the stairs and found Alex on her knees in the closet organizing their shoes. Kayce stuffed his hands in his pockets and leaned against the doorframe.
"What're you doing?" Kayce asked.
Alex looked up at him.
"Trying to make us have a chance of grabbing a pair of boots that match," Alex sighed. "Would it kill you to at least try and place your boots in here instead of throwing 'em around?"
"You okay?" Kayce didn't like Alex's tone.
"Yeah," Alex ran her finger through her hair. "I'm sorry."
Kayce slid down until he was sitting with his legs laid out across the doorway to the closet. Alex sat back on her butt and wrapped her arms around her knees. She watched Kayce reach up and rub his face, the look of exhaustion evident on his face.
"What happened?" He asked her.
"Nothing happened," Alex said. "I'm just tired and I was grouchy so I decided to take it out on you."
"But I didn't do something?" Kayce made sure.
"No, baby," Alex crawled over to Kayce and leaned against him.
Kayce wrapped his arms around her, tucking her head under his chin. Alex related against him, Kayce's heartbeat calming her wired nerves. She took a deep breath and closed her eyes. Kayce rubbed up and down her back slowly.
"How was your day?" Alex asked softly.
"Long," Kayce said.
"Well..." Alex leaned back and looked at him. "Ain't we a pair?"
Kayce smirked at her. Alex reached up and tugged gently on Kayce's hair before her hand moved to his chest. She took another deep breath.
"Beth asked me about having children this morning," Alex said.
Kayce tilted his head in confusion.
"About us having kids," Alex clarified. "If we wanted them...if I wanted them...I kept asking her why she was asking me those questions and she never would tell me."
Kayce blinked back at Alex. Alex swallowed hard.
"I told her that...I didn't know," Alex continued to talk since she was nervous. "That I thought I did...maybe? I said Lee never wanted kids so I sort of had it in my mind that I wouldn't have any because of that. But that's changed and well...I don't know."
"I think," Kayce cleared his throat. "I think this was around the time Jamie...look, Beth had something happen to her-"
"I know what happened," Alex said, stopping Kayce from having to tell her the story. "Lee told me a while ago."
"Oh," Kayce nodded. "I never knew Lee knew."
"I'm sorry," Alex sighed. "I know this is awkward."
"It ain't awkward," Kayce shook his head. "I'm just waiting to get you to say all of what you're thinking so I know how to respond."
Alex felt a small smile grace her lips.
"I told her I thought about having kids," Alex said. "I didn't know much more after that."
"Alright," Kayce nodded. "That doesn't sound so bad."
"I guess not," Ale tilted her head.
"But...?" Kayce looked at her.
"Um...do you?" Alex asked. "Do you think about kids? I guess...more kids for you."
"I think about it," Kayce said, his voice low.
"You do?" Alex was a bit surprised.
Because of how Tate came into this world and what has transpired with him, Alex wasn't sure Kayce would want to go through that again with another child.
"Yeah," Kayce nodded. "How could I not?"
Alex felt her bottom lip open but no sound came out of her mouth. Kayce was smiling at her now and she felt very warm.
"Don't run away," Kayce whispered playfully to her.
"I can't," Alex breathed out. "You're still holding onto me."
Kayce laughed, rising to his knee. He held Alex's face between his hands and looked down at her now. His warm caramel eyes were bright and Alex felt lightheaded.
"Of course, I think about babies," Kayce leaned down and kissed her roughly.
Alex felt like she couldn't breathe as Kayce's lips moved across hers.
"I'm gonna take a shower," Kayce broke their kiss and stood up fully.
Alex blinked a few times, watching Kayce walk out of the closet. She was breathing hard, trying to cool off her cheeks. She heard the water turn on as she pressed her fingers against her lips. Shutting her eyes Alex's mind went into the shower with Kayce and before she could fully open her eyes again, Alex was racing into the bathroom after Kayce.
**
As Alex left the barn after her work, she saw two sheriff trucks pull up to the main house. Frowning, she picked up her pace. When she got to the house, John was outside with them. His eyes looked over at Alex.
"Alex," John waved her over to him.
The two deputies eyed her as she stood next to John. Alex felt small under their gaze.
"This is our nurse on the ranch," John said. "Alex...they're looking for Jimmy. Is he down there?"
"I-I haven't seen him today " Alex glanced at the men. "But it's a big ranch and there's a lot of hands."
"He ain't in trouble, ma'am," One of the deputies nodded.
"What happened then?" Alex asked.
"They found his grandfather," John said.
"Found?" Alex swallowed.
"Died from injuries," The deputy said. "He had enough bruises in his body...some old, some fresh."
Alex felt sick to her stomach.
"We'll find him and let him know," John said. "Does he need to come down and sign something?"
"He will," The deputies nodded and left sooner after.
John looked at Alex.
"He's in the barn," Alex said and before John could acted surprised she continued. "I didn't want him to be in trouble."
John nodded.
"Come on," He said and led Alex back toward the barn.
**
"The fuck is he doing?" Kayce asked as he and Rip came up to stand next to Alex and John.
They were all watching Jimmy take a shovel to a tree. Alex winced as Jimmy continued to pound the shovel into the bark. She crossed her arms and looked at Kayce.
"The men Jimmy owed the money too?" She said. "Well, they beat up his grandfather and he...succumbed to his injuries yesterday."
Kayce frowned. Rip walked over to where Jimmy was. Alex hated seeing Jimmy collapse into Rip's arms. She turned around and looked at Kayce. Kayce reached his hand up to hold Alex's face, his thumb gently rubbing back and forth along her cheek bone.
"Guess everyone here has enemies," Alex said quietly.
Kayce stepped closer and kissed her forehead.
"Go back to the house, baby," He told her.
Alex didn't like it, but she did what Kayce told her.
**
It was closer to one in the morning when Kayce walked back into the bedroom. Alex had left the small light on the dresser lit for him. She stayed still in the bed as she listened the him change out of his clothes and slip under the covers. A few seconds passed by when Alex felt Kayce's hand in her side.
"You awake?" Kayce whispered.
Sighing, Alex turned on her back and look over at Kayce. The moonlight made it possible for her to see his face and eyes looking at her. He looked okay, but she could smell something. Alex tilted her nose up and sniffed the air. Kayce swallowed as he watched her.
"You smell like smoke," Alex said.
"C'mere," Kayce pulled on her hip.
Alex rolled over and leaned into Kayce's side. He wrapped his arm around her securely. She rested her hand against Kayce's chest and looked up at him. His hand slipped under her shirt as he rubbed her back.
"Where did y'all go?" Alex asked.
"Go to sleep, baby," Kayce said.
Alex narrowed her eyes.
"What happened?" She tried again.
"Everything is fine," Kayce sighed.
"You're really not gonna answer me?" Alex asked.
When Kayce didn't respond she quickly flipped around. Her back to Kayce she tucked her hand under her cheek. She heard Kayce sigh heavily.
"We just helped Jimmy defend his grandfather," Kayce said lowly.
Alex looked over her shoulder at him, trying to analyze if he was telling the truth.
"Then why do you smell like smoke?" Alex asked.
"Because something was burning," Kayce said.
"Did you burn it?" Alex blinked.
"We did," Kayce nodded.
Alex rolled back onto her back and looked up at the ceiling. She rested her hands on her stomach and yawned.
"You know Lee would do this," She said quietly. "He'd go off...be gone and then come back and not tell me anything about it."
Alex looked at Kayce who was watching her closely. She leaned up on her elbow and pushed Kayce's hair away from his face. Her lips pressed against his in a sweet kiss.
"Please don't do that to me too," Alex asked.
Later that morning
Alex watched the news going on the television. A fire in one of the trailer parks not that far from the ranch had burned down one of the homes. It turned out to be a drug front, but all three men inside burned with the home.
Stirring her coffee, Alex took a deep breath. Kayce walked into the bedroom, finishing buttoning his shirt cuff. He looked at the news and then Alex. She eyed him, sipping her coffee slowly.
"I'll have Tate when I come back," He told her.
"You think having your son will protect you from me?" Alex smirked at him.
"Need all the help I can't get apparently," Kayce stepped over to her.
Alex held her mug up for Kayce but he scrunched his nose.
"It's just a little milk and sugar," Alex rolled her eyes.
"Black is just easier baby," Kayce held her hips in his hands.
"Speak for yourself," Alex took another sip. "Is your day busy today?"
"A few calls," Kayce shrugged. "Then whatever life throws at us."
Alex nodded, reaching up with one hand to smooth out his bread. It was rough against her fingertips.
"Be careful," Alex smiled up at him.
"You too, baby," Kayce said. "Don't let Rip boss you around."
"He can't boss me around," Alex laughed, finishing her coffee and setting her mug on the dresser.
She wrapped her arms around Kayce's neck. Kayce smirked at her, his hand moved down to push against her ass.
"I need to go," Kayce said quietly.
"Okay," Alex said but neither of them moved.
Kayce took a deep breath and shook his head. He leaned down and pressed a chaste kiss to her lips before stepping back.
"Bye, baby," Kayce reached for his hat and placed it on his head before leaving.
Alex waited until she heard the front door open and close. She walked over to the window and opened it, feeling the cold air. She saw Kayce open his truck door. John was walking up from the barn with Rip.
"Hey!" Alex called out, making Kayce look behind and then above him.
The smile on his face was large.
"I love you," Alex told him.
"I love you," Kayce got into his truck.