The following days saw Rolus hovering over Luke. Luke was sick, the side effects of the medicine Robert gave him.
He kept on running a fever, and it didn't help that they were away from their Packs. Rolus didn't see the need to go back home when his mate was unstable. What would he say to his parents and Peter? When they took their impromptu trip, Luke was well. Even Peter saw that.
When the effects of the injection Robert gave him wore off, he found himself in a hotel room, with Luke still unconscious. Rolus didn't know if he was crazy or not, but he felt grateful to Robert that he didn't just dump them in the middle of nowhere. He was even grateful that there was a note and some medicine that detailed the treatment of his mate for the after effects.
Rolus spent his days fussing over his mate, making sure that he recovered well. He didn't know if he was selfish or not, but he dreaded the moment his mate would recover from the effects.
Luke would wake up, then Rolus would make sure that he ate, then he would sleep thereafter. Luke was always disoriented, seeking sleep after waking up.
As much as he wished for Luke to recover, he was afraid of what awaited him when he did wake up. Would the Netlac have worked? Would Luke really have no idea of their mate bond?
Rolus hated starting all over again for them to be civil. Luke was difficult, and it was a war to get to the level they were in the previous weeks.
Rolus was working on autopilot whilst taking care of his mate. His mind was all over the place. Having to go back to his Pack started to occupy his mind when Luke was getting better.
He made sure to be out of Luke's way anytime Luke was awake. He didn't want the crushing reality that the Netlac worked to kill him.
As far as he could see in the days that passed, it seemed like the Netlac didn't work. Luke was aware of Rolus, and didn't seem to hate the same air that Rolus breathed.
It seemed that Luke was also aware that Rolus tiptoed around him, but he didn't ask why.
Then one morning, it seemed that Luke was fully healed because he approached Rolus. He found him sleeping on the couch.
"What happened?" Luke asked, sitting next to Rolus when he sat up.
Rolus was relieved, enveloping his mate in a hug. He smelled him, letting his scent wash away his worries. But one incessant worry didn't go away. Rolus was counting down, waiting for the Netlac to take effect. He was not naive enough to believe that Robert was bluffing.
Rolus' face was buried on Luke's neck, right on his mate mark. He could hear the steady beat of Luke's heart, his stable emotions through the mate bond, and the scent that drove his wolf crazy. His words were muffled when he said, "What do you remember?"
Luke took a while to answer. His heartbeat was loud, beating against Rolus' chest so quickly. "We were hijacked."
Rolus didn't deem it important to tell his mate what went down. He was unconscious the whole time. Even though it physically hurt him to lie, he didn't think he would ever tell anyone what happened. Luke was going to forget all about him, so he didn't want to worry him.
That's the repercussions of his actions. He was to keep the Robert issue buried deep, and bear the burden. It was his secret to keep.
"They were petty thieves. Knocked us out and took our car."
Luke didn't believe him, but he didn't say anything. He laid back on the couch, with Rolus falling back with him. Rolus didn't dare get off. He didn't think he would disattach himself from Luke unless necessary.
Rolus knew he was clingy, but he needed to savour Luke's scent, touch and proximity before all of it was ripped from under his feet.
Luke didn't object. He wrapped his arms around Rolus.
The moment the first tear escaped, it was like a floodgate was opened. The impending doom was hard on Rolus. It was just a matter of when the Netlac would take effect.
All he wished for was for the Netlac to take effect when they were both in the comfort of their own Packs. He would have to string a story along of why Luke would act the way he would.
Luke just held him when he broke down. He whispered assuring words, that all will be well.
Rolus wanted to laugh at that. His world would end when Luke forgot all about him. But for the moment, he pretended like all was well, and stopped counting down.
_________
The drive back to their Packs was filled with suffocating tension. It was tension on Rolus' side. He didn't know how to act. His heart felt heavy, and he felt the impending doom choking him.
Luke tried so hard to pry the information from him, but Rolus was not easily swayed. This drove an edge in their relationship. Rolus didn't let the drift affect him because he knew in a few seconds, minutes, hours or days, Luke would be his sworn enemy.
He rested his head on the window, watching the scenery pass by. He knew he should be cherishing every moment with his mate, but he couldn't even bring himself to look at him.
Luke kept on giving him worried glances whilst he drove the rental.
They had agreed that Luke would drop Rolus at his Pack, then Luke would drive to his. They thought it was better to address their Packs separately.
Rolus didn't even see the need to tell his Pack that he was mated. It was a waste of time because eventually, Luke was going to forget about him. He knew that his Pack would know who his mate was by their mixed scents, but at this moment, he didn't care.
He was tired. He was tired of keeping secrets. He was tired of not being able to love his mate freely. Hell, he was tired of the world, of his Pack, responsibilities and his devotion. He just wanted to be with his mate. He was tired of the endless sacrifices he made, and continued to make. He was tired of it all.
When he felt Luke's hand on his shoulder, he came back from his mellowing. He realised that they were at his Pack border. He needed to leave.
"We're here," Luke said, awkwardly gesturing to the scenery in front of them.
Rolus nodded, not moving.
"I'll see you tomorrow?" Luke asked.
Rolus didn't verbally reply. He just tugged Luke to him and embraced him. He hugged him so tight, and didn't think of letting go. He tried to memorize his scent - even though he would never forget it. He tried to memorize the feel of his touch - even though there were layers of clothing standing in the way. But he tried to memorize everything and nothing.
"Fuck! I'm going to miss you," he murmured against Luke's collarbone, his voice mumbled. For him, there was no tomorrow. There was only now. There was no certainty that tomorrow Luke would recall their mate bond.
He felt himself shake, still holding on tight. He couldn't let himself let go, but he had to.
"I'll miss you too, Rolus. But you will come by tomorrow, right? I will have spoken to my Pack and calmed down Peter. You won't have a problem there," Luke said.
Rolus slowly let go, looking Luke in the eye. He dodged Luke's question, and averted his eyes. He didn't make a move to move.
He heard Luke sigh.
"I tried to be understanding back in the hotel and didn't pester you," Luke started.
Rolus didn't have the energy to argue. He was burdened by everything. Everything was weighing him down.
"Rolus, talk to me. What really happened?"
Rolus could hear the creeping agitation in Luke's voice. "And like I said, nothing. Call me tomorrow, alright?"
Luke shook his head, confused. "I thought you were coming over tomorrow?"
"I'm tired, Luke. Just call me tomorrow, please."
Rolus released the seat belt and grabbed his bag from the back. He opened the door, preparing to head out. It pained him to brush off Luke and his questions and concerns. But he couldn't let him know about Robert when he was so close to losing it all.
He didn't leave without capturing Luke's lips in what he wished could convey his desperation and heartbreak.
When he pulled away, he rested his forehead on Luke's shoulder, and basked in his scent.
"I'll call you tomorrow," Luke promised.
Rolus was relieved. He knew that if Luke called him tomorrow, then the Netlac would not have yet worked.
Then maybe Rolus would visit his mate, after confirming that indeed Luke was of sane mind.
It was a struggle to leave, but he managed it. He took his time getting to the Pack House. He knew his Pack already felt his presence when he was sitting with Luke in the car. So, Sierra was likely waiting for him.
He didn't want Sierra to cause a scene in front of the Pack. The nearer he approached the House, the more he felt Sierra's anger.
When he was in the radius to mind-link with her, he told her to come to his room and will explain.
Sierra was boiling, he could tell.
Rolus made sure to go straight to his room. He luckily didn't run into anyone. He figured everyone didn't want to be in his way.
He was grateful for his Pack. They knew when to respect boundaries, unlike a certain redhead that Rolus found pacing in his room.
Before Sierra could say anything, Rolus shook his head. Something in his eyes made Sierra falter.
She pursed her lips.
He went straight to the bathroom, then washed his face. The black bags under his eyes were prominent, together with the paleness of his skin.
He did not get much sleep the four days they spent in that hotel. He was always looking after Luke.
When he came out, he went to his bedroom and changed into his sweatpants. When he was done, he found Sierra having brewed coffee, two mugs in her hands when he was about to exit his bedroom.
"We'll talk in your room," she said.
Rolus nodded. He went to his bed and sat down, leaning against the headboard. Sierra gave him his coffee and sat down on the edge of the bed.
She didn't say anything until they both finished their coffee. "Was it worth it?" she asked, the disdain in her voice obvious.
Rolus wanted to lie, but berated himself. He shook his head. It was not worth it at all. It was not worth Luke being tortured and given the Netlac.
Sierra narrowed her eyes and said, "Figured as much. Then why did you fully bond?"
"Sierra? Do you know about the Netlac method?" Rolus asked, watching as his Beta looked confused.
"What does the Netlac method have to do with my question?"
Rolus perked up at that. That meant Sierra had an idea of what it was. "Tell me what you know, please."
"Why would you want to know about that?"
Rolus was starting to get irritated at her questioning. "You know what? It's fine."
Sierra shook her head, saying, "No, no. I was just baffled. The Netlac method has been eradicated from existence many years ago. It was a method used to win lands and conquer wars. The Netlac was a medicine that was given to true mates to make their mates suffer. It was usually given to the Alpha's mate. It wiped a certain period from their memory. The period targeted was usually when they met their mates.
"It also suppressed the mate bond and created unnecessary irritation and hatred towards their mate. So, there was no chance of reconciliation between the mates. The Alphas were weakened by their mates feelings and distance. That made it easy for enemies to invade and conquer Packs."
Rolus pinched the bridge of his nose, distressed. "Does it work immediately when ingested?"
Sierra narrowed her eyes, suspicious. "Alpha, what's going on? Did something happen?"
Rolus felt himself choke up. He didn't mourn the impending loss when he was away. "Please excuse me. We will talk in the morning."
Sierra felt Rolus' grieve. She did as told and left.
It was a floodgate. The tears of his. He was already burning from the secret he was keeping from Luke. He wanted to tell his mate what happened with Robert, but he didn't want Luke to worry, and it was also useless to tell Luke when he was going to forget anyway.