ISAIAH
"Isaiah come out come out wherever you are. I promise daddy is not mad anymore." The cold chilling voice of my father calls out from the other side of the closed bedroom door.
I know he is lying. Daddy always lies. I know he is mad at me because I tried watching TV when he was asleep. There was a football game on but he was asleep so I thought it okay to watch my cartoons. But then he woke up from his nap and found me watching cartoons which made him really mad. I tried to apologize and reach for the remote to change it back to the game but I accidentally knocked his beer bottle onto the floor and broke it. He reached out to hit me so I ran to my room and locked the door, hiding under the bed.
"Isaiah, open this door." Daddy demands.
The lock jiggles as he tries to open the door only to find it locked which pisses him even more. He starts banging on it but even I know better than to unlock it. Daddy always hurts me when he is mad and my leg still hurts from where he hit me last week.
I clamp my hand over my mouth when sobs threaten to escape. Maybe if I am really quiet, daddy will leave and go back to watching his game. I want to call out to mom but she is not home yet and even if she was daddy always hurts her more than he does me and I do not want him to hurt her because of my mistake.
"Isaiah do not make me break this door down!" Daddy demands banging on the door.
A whimper escapes my lips when I feel him try to break it down. He is going to come in and when he does he is going to hurt me again. I curl into a ball and try making myself as small as possible praying for help.
"Okay, that's it." Daddy yells.
It goes quiet for a moment and I think he has left until I hear a loud crash followed by the sound of my door hitting the floor. I shuffle back trying to move as far back under the bed as I can but there is only so far I can go.
Daddy's footsteps thunder into the room and I can hear him moving around searching for me. I try not to move or make any sound but that does not help because his boots appear at the foot of the bed. He laughs maniacally and a second later, his face appears. He reaches for me and grabs my leg before I can run dragging me from under the bed.
"I got you now boy. You thought you could run from me. Now I'm going to teach you a lesson about manners." He yells bringing my face up to where I can smell the beer on his breath.
"I'm sorry daddy." I whimper hoping he will have mercy on me.
"Too late." He decrees as he lands a blow to my face.
I scream out loud in pain as I feel the familiar tangy taste of blood fill my mouth. He lifts his fist to strike me again but mom bursts into the room looking livid.
"Let go of my son." She screams and that is when I see the shiny metal in her hand.
"Or what? You are going to shoot me? C'mon we both know you do not have the guts. Give me the gun Rebecca before you do something that gets you hurt." Daddy demands holding his hand out.
"I said let go of my son Caleb or I will kill you." Mom screams her hands shaking as tears stream down her face.
"Rebecca give me the gun!" Daddy screams tossing me away so he can lunge at mom.
I land on the floor and twist my arm awkwardly which causes me to scream out in pain. This makes mom distracted so daddy takes this chance to reach for her. Mom resists and they both fall to the floor and start fighting for the gun. Daddy manages to wrestle it out of mom's hand. He slaps her and gets to his feet kicking her away.
"Look at you threatening me with a gun. Maybe I should just shoot both of you and be done with it. That sounds about right and I'll start with your precious little boy." Daddy threatens turning towards me with a murderous look on his face.
"Don't you dare hurt my son." Mom screams trying to get up but she is clearly in pain.
"I'll kill him first and then you next." Daddy chuckles in a way that makes my skin crawl in fear.
"Caleb leave me alone. Come here baby." Mom calls out.
"Do not move Isaiah." Daddy yells the gun still aimed at me.
Mom gets to her feet and reaches for the gun once more but before she can my dad squeezes the trigger and fires. The gun goes off and mom screams.
"Isaiah!"
I wake up with a start, a scream lodged in my throat, my whole body drenched in sweat. Ruby startles awake and immediately notices my panic so she rushes to my side and starts licking my face cleaning up my tears and sweat.
My heart feels like it's struggling to beat out of my chest and I can barely breath.
Fuck.
This cannot be happening again. I have not had a nightmare this intense in months so I'm quite shook up from it. The time on my alarm clock lets me know that it's four am in the morning meaning I've only managed two hours of sleep tonight. I toss the covers away and get out of bed with Ruby right behind me.
"I'm okay girl. I'm okay." I reassure her even though I am the furthest thing from okay.
When I get to the bathroom my reflection on the mirror nearly knocks me off my feet. My eyes look haunted and bloodshot like I haven't slept in days. I take off my drenched t-shirt and toss it into the laundry basket. My fingers caress the scar on my stomach as flashbacks of the vivid dream still linger at the back of my mind.
I step away from the mirror and grab a fresh t-shirt and my running shoes from my closet. There is no going back to sleep for me which means Ruby and I are going for a run. She knows the drill so she is right behind me when I leave my room.
As I run I cannot help but think about what has brought my nightmares back.
My current fight with Kennedy.
Ever since she found out that my mom is the senator she has been avoiding my calls and texts. I even went by their house yesterday after church when Archer told me that she called in sick for work but Glynn refused to buzz me in on orders from her. It's not like I hid the truth from her intentionally, I was going to tell her that is why I invited her to Cairo's birthday but fate had other plans and she found out before I could tell her.
In all honesty I understand why she is mad. She let me fully into her life, even with her dysfunctional parents but I did not extend her the same courtesy. It has been a while since someone was mad at me and it's taking its toll on me thus the nightmares. I need to fix this situation with Kennedy and quick because I need her. She is my happiness and without her in my life I am afraid the dark thoughts will creep back in and I cannot go back to that dark period in my life.
When the sun starts rising I end my run around the compound so Ruby and I head back into the house. I go directly to the kitchen to get a glass of water and I am surprised to find mom in there all dressed and ready for work.
"Morning mom."
"Morning baby. You okay?" She asks looking concerned.
I am too tired to lie and I'm sure that it is obvious on my face so I don't bother lying. I grab a bottle of water from the fridge, pour some out for Ruby in her bowl before drinking the rest.
"That bad huh?" Mom inquires.
I nod and take a seat on the stool next to her. "I had a nightmare. A really bad one." I confess.
"Do you want to talk about it?" She offers.
"No, I do not want to relive it." I answer.
Mom already knows the content of most of my nightmares since there are more like bad memories from the past and she was there for all of them.
"I understand but may I ask what triggered it. It has been a while since you had one, right?" She asks.
"Yes." I nod.
"Does it have something to do with your current fight with Kennedy?" Mom pushes.
I am not even surprised that she picked up on that. My foul mood has been evident from the charity event on Saturday. Part of me regrets accompanying mom in place of Parker.
If I had not gone then Kennedy and I wouldn't currently be in the middle of the biggest fight since our relationship started. She would have found out the whole truth on my terms but now it's all blown to shit and I am left picking up the pieces.
"Yes but I am going to fix it." I assure her.
"So you are the one that messed up?"
"Yes."
"I won't ask how but I believe you will do the right thing. I like Kennedy, she seems very nice." Mom praises.
"She is incredible." I reply.
"I know she is. Don't worry baby, all relationships have their ups and downs. You and Kennedy will get through this." Mom reassures me.
"I know we will."
She kisses my temple before grabbing her coffee mug and leaving the kitchen. Ruby and I leave soon after and go back to my room so I can get ready for school as I think about all the ways I can make it up to Kennedy for lying to her, but first she will have to talk to me and I have a feeling she will make that very hard.
Breakfast with the family cheers me up a bit especially since Cairo will not stop talking about his birthday. I hope Kennedy and I will have patched things up by then so that I can still bring her. I want her to meet everyone properly.
"Good luck baby." Mom whispers as she hugs me goodbye once we're done with breakfast.
"Thanks mom." I whisper knowing I need all the luck in the world.
Kennedy being my first girlfriend means I have no experience with a girlfriend-boyfriend fight so I'll just have to wing it and hope for the best. I cannot lose her especially when our relationship means so much more to me now that we were intimate.
It was the first time for both of us and I did my best to make it special for the both of us and I would like to think that I achieved that. Now I just have to make her forgive me because I want more moments like that with her.
I have been picking Kennedy up for school since the semester began and even though odds are that she won't want one from me today I still take my chances and drive to her house. Upon arrival Glynn informs me through the intercom that Kennedy has already left for school. At least there she cannot avoid me so I change course and head for school.
When I arrive at Pine View, I park my car and immediately begin my hunt for her but I am sidelined when I run into our friends by the lockers and find that she is not there.
"Hey man!" Wesley grins as we share our handshake.
"Wassup."
"Where is Kennedy?" Kristie asks.
It's an appropriate question since we always arrive together and there is rarely a moment when we are not glued together.
"We drove separately today." I answer.
I don't want them to know that Kennedy and I are in the middle of a fight especially since I have no idea whose side they will take. Probably hers because I am in the wrong.
Before they can ask any more questions the PA system crackles with an oncoming announcement. "All seniors please assemble at the gymnasium."
"This is definitely about the senior trip." Kristie says and we all agree.
I cannot tell them that we are going to Egypt because then they would ask how I know. Kennedy has not yet told them who she really is and I am not about to out her. She trusted me with her secrets and told me everything yet I did not and this realization makes me feel worse about myself.
"You okay Iz?" Baron asks as we walk towards the gymnasium.
"Yeah, I just didn't get enough sleep last night." I reply.
"Like I always say, you drive yourself too hard. You need to slow down man, otherwise one of these days you will crash and hard." Baron warns.
"I hear you."
He is right, I do drive myself hard but it's all I know. With Kennedy I have learnt to have fun as well but that does not mean I have slacked in other areas. I still have school, basketball, my two jobs and volunteering. Maybe I will slow it down when I join college and move away from home. Then I can focus on school and basketball but for now there is no room for me to be anything other than what I am.
"So you always say." Baron scoffs knowing me too well.
I ignore him because we've had this talk too many times. I am not in the mood to get into it with him especially when I have much more pressing matters at hand. I keep darting my head left and right looking for that familiar unmistakable red mop of hair with no luck.
When we get to the gymnasium I still can't spot Kennedy which makes me think that Glynn lied to me and she skipped school which is very unlike her. This is the same girl who fought us all through Senior Skip Day so even if she does not want to see me, I know she is here.
Mr. Patterson walks in with a few more teachers including Miss June and we are asked to settle down. That's when the gymnasium doors open and Kennedy walks in. My whole body immediately reacts to seeing her and I wish that it was just the two of us in here so I could run to her and pull her into my arms. She spots us and Wesley waves us over but she ignores him and instead sits with Andre a couple of rows away from us.
"That's weird. What's up with Kennedy?" Wesley asks looking at me.
I shrug refusing to give him a response. Nobody will know of our fight until we talk or at least they won't hear it from me. Kennedy is still friends with them and can talk to them first. Before Wes can press the issue further Mr. Patterson clears his throat on the microphone and the whole senior class falls silent.
"I know you're all aware why I've summoned you here this morning." Mr. Patterson begins.
"Are we going to Egypt or not?" Wesley yells causing an uproar from the rest of the students.
"Everybody calm down." Mr. Patterson calls out and all the noise dies down. "Thank you so much for that Mr. Row." He comments sarcastically eyeing Wesley.
"You are welcome sir." Wesley retorts making the other students laugh.
Wesley will always be a clown and he is lucky the school needs him otherwise he would have been expelled a long time ago for his pranks and smartass mouth.
"As I was saying. We received a very generous donation which means you will be going to Egypt for your senior trip." Mr. Patterson announces causing the whole gymnasium to go crazy.
I already knew this and the person responsible. My eyes wander to Kennedy who is smiling and clapping trying to play it cool yet all this happiness and cheer is because of her. She turns and our eyes meet causing her smile to drop which causes my chest to tighten in pain.
Damn, she is still mad.
Mr. Patterson waits for the students to calm down before he continues with his announcement but I am barely paying attention. I cannot take my eyes off Kennedy and I have half a mind to go to her right now but it will not be the right move so I hold back and bid my time.
The meeting ends and I have barely heard anything so I'll have to ask Baron to brief me later. I'm sure some important details were shared that I missed especially about all that we will need to travel. Lucky for me I already have a passport so for the most part I am sorted.
Mr. Patterson dismisses us to go to class and I get up to go to Kennedy but she is faster and disappears before I can get to her. There is no need to chase after her now because we have different classes which means I will have to wait until lunch time to talk to her. I hope I can find her then since the school is huge and if she is really determined she can manage to hide from me.
"Egypt here we come!!!" Wesley cheers excitedly as we all walk out of the gymnasium headed for our chemistry class.
"Who do you think made the donation?" Kristie asks.
I know but I cannot say so I let them decipher for themselves which they can't unless they have a link to the office.
"Was it your mom Iz?" Baron asks me.
"No." I reply.
"I don't know but we'll ask Kennedy during lunch. She probably knows since this was her idea." Kristie suggests and they all settle at that.
I am in zombie mode for most of the morning which is unlike me seeing as I am always attentive in class but it's hard to concentrate when I cannot get my mind off Kennedy. The thought that she is mad at me makes my heart hurt more than I ever thought possible. I need to fix this, fix us, soon, because I don't think I can survive another day of this.
When lunch rolls around, my anxiety is through the roof because I know of the talk Kennedy and I are about to have. I hang back giving her time to get to the cafeteria if she is going. If I get there first there is a chance she will see me and sit elsewhere. There is also a chance she won't up to the cafeteria at all but I am willing to skip lunch so I can look for her.
When I get to the cafeteria, my appetite is nonexistent so I skip the lunch line and head directly to the table where Kennedy is.
She came!
This is my chance and I am not going to mess it up. All the words I had gathered disappear as soon as she turns and sees me. My usual spot next to her is empty so I take it and turn to her unable to say a word so we just sit there staring at each other.
"Okay! What is going on with the two of you?" Wesley asks. "First you come to school separately, then princess refused to sit with us at the assembly and now you two are not even talking to each other."
"Did you break up?" Kristie asks.
"No."
"No."
We answer at the same time which makes me smile. There is still hope so with that I get up and hold my hand out towards her.
"Berry."
She turns to me and sees my outstretched hand. She does not hesitate to take it so I pull her to her feet and lead her away from our friends and out of the cafeteria. We find the closest empty class and I walk her in before closing the door behind us.
Before she can say anything I pull her into my arms for a hug having been deprived of her touch for two whole days. I relax when she hugs me back letting me know that we are going to be okay.
"I am so sorry." I apologize finally finding my words. "I should not have kept such a huge secret from you especially when you have been so open and honest with me."
Kennedy smiles which surprises me because I expected her to make me grovel some more.
"I'm sorry too." She expresses surprising me even more.
"For what? You did nothing wrong." I remind her.
"I overreacted. I'm sure you had your own reasons for not telling me that your mom is the senator and besides you were going to introduce me anyway." She reasons and now it's my turn to smile.
This is actually easier than I thought. I was ready to beg and plead on my knees but she is being so nice about the whole situation.
"That's very understanding of you. So am I forgiven?" I ask hopefully.
"Yes." She nods cupping my face.
I lean into her touch and kiss her palm. "Then why were you icing me out?"
"I was still mad at you but then we went all weekend without talking which made me miss you. Then we didn't talk all morning which was just weird." She explains.
"I missed you too Berry and I am sorry for not being honest with you." I repeat again.
These were the longest two days I've had in a long time, coupled with the nightmare and I never want to go through that again.
"It's okay." Kennedy assures me.
"But I promise right now to never keep another thing from you." I promise her.
"Pinky promise?" She asks holding her pinky out.
I smile and link my pinky with hers. "Pinky promise."
Her smile is enough to light up the whole world which lets me know that we are okay. I kiss her forehead as all tension of the last two days is released from my body. She cups my face and lowers my head to reach my lips. I kiss her back, a single tear escaping my eye that we are alright.
"Let's never fight again." I plead with her.
"Yes please. That was hell." She nods kissing me once more.
We leave the classroom holding hands after a mini make out session. Our friends are happy to see us back together but we don't tell them why we were fighting in the first place. That is between us. While we were away Wesley managed to eat half of Kennedy's packed lunch being his usual typical self. My stomach is still in knots from our fight so I take a few bites and let Kennedy have the rest.
Kennedy is back by my side and peace restored to the kingdom which is all that matters to me.