Mia's POV.......
My mom and I just got back from visiting my dad's grave. Today makes it exactly two years since my father passed away.
We're now sitting together on the couch in the sitting room. My head is placed on my mom's shoulder and one of her hands is running on my arm.
"Are you okay, sweetie?" Mom asks.
"Yes. Are you?" I ask.
"I think I am." Mom says.
"You miss him a lot, don't you?" I ask.
"Of course I do. Don't you?" Mom asks.
"I do....more than a lot." I say.
"Mia, you know your father wasn't a bad person, right?" Mom asks.
"I know he wasn't." I say.
"Your dad was a better person than myself. He was one of the nicest men I've ever met."
"Then what went wrong between you two?" I lift my head off my mom's shoulder to face her. "You know you never told me what happened. Why did he leave and never came back?" I ask.
"It's a really long story, Mia." Mom says.
"I still wanna hear it, mom. It's not like there's anything important to do right now." I say.
My mom lets out a light sigh.
"I hope you can forgive me after I tell you this."
"Forgive you? Okay, now you're scaring me, mom. What is it?" I ask.
"You remember your dad had always travelled a lot for business stuffs, right?" Mom asks.
"Yeah" I reply.
"There was a time he travelled to Chicago for a business trip. Few weeks after he got back from that trip, he started acting strange. He had always looked like he was bothered about something that he didn't wanna share with me and he even started treating me a bit differently. Before I knew it, Will was going on a business trip every two weeks instead of once in a month or even two months. I started getting worried and curious about what was going on with him. I had kept asking him what was going on with him but he had refused to tell me. Months later, it got to answering midnight calls that he never answered whenever I'm around him. I had also asked him about the midnight calls and all he had always said was that it was work related but then I remembered that he had never been called for work issue at midnight and he never took any work related calls in secret. I started suspecting that he might've been cheating on me. It made me so insecure and your dad and I had lots of argument because of it. You were yet to turn six when that happened so I don't think you understood that we were having an argument."
"I understood that you and Dad were having an argument but I chose to play dumb."
"Oh.....I didn't know that. Well....my insecurity drove me so far that I was forced to go through your dad's phone and realized that he has been receiving lots of calls and texts from an "Ella". When I saw the texts, I was heartbroken. Your father caught me going through his phone but I had already figured out that he might've been having an affair with someone else."
"What did the texts say?"
"The texts were mostly that "Ella" telling your dad to pay her a visit. Will later explained everything. It happened that he had an affair with a female co-worker who was based there in Chicago and he got that co-worker pregnant during the affair. He had confessed that he had been lying about the every two weeks business trip, that he was going to Chicago to see how the pregnant lady was doing since the lady wasn't gonna abort the child."
What?
My dad cheated on my mom?
WTF!!!!
"Mom, are you saying that dad had an affair with someone in Chicago and impregnated the person?" I ask in shock.
"Yes. I felt so betrayed. I hated your dad so much for that. He had kept asking me for forgiveness but I refused to listen to any of those pleadings. I found out about that affair two nights before your sixth birthday so your dad and I had agreed to keep things cool for your sake, so that your birthday could be as wonderful as other birthdays you've had. Fortunately, our plan had worked. Three nights after that birthday, I came home pretty late 'cause we had a situation at the boutique that we had to handle as soon as possible. I had met your father packing up some of his stuffs. I asked him why and he said that the so-called co-worker had requested for his presence, that he had booked a flight to Chicago already. I was so pissed off from both the crappy day I had and what your father had just told me. We started another argument that night, a pretty long and more serious one. I had told your father that if he left for Chicago that night, that he shouldn't bother coming back. I told him I'd feel better if he had just disappeared. I went further to tell him that he should never concern himself with you and I again, that I'd take up the responsibility of raising you and caring for myself and he should never ever think of reaching out to both of us. He had requested to set his eyes on you one more time before he left and I let him."
I see tears already clustering in my mom's eyes.
"After he left, he called me couple of times but I didn't pick up. He had texted me too but I never bothered to reply not minding that the texts were always asking for my forgiveness or requesting to hear your voice. I turned a blind eye to all those stuff..."
Reminds me of someone....
Myself.....
How did we do the same stuff???
".....at some point, I blocked and deleted his contact so he'd never reach me again. After sometime, I found myself missing my husband so much, wishing that I had never shut him out like I did. I wanted to call him, I had his contact written somewhere but I was too proud to do what I needed to do. When the boutique was facing serious financial crisis, I had no idea what to do. I knew your father could easily help me out of the situation but I didn't want to let my guard down 'cause I was the one who told Will never to concern himself with anything that had to do with me or you, giving him the impression that I'm independent enough to handle being a single mom and other things. I was the one who decided to cut him off so calling for help would've been a really shameful and pathetic thing to do. Later on, I took out a loan and set things right and before I knew it, I was financially back on my feet again but it didn't stop me from regretting how I just cut him off especially from you. I'm so sorry, Mia. I shouldn't have taken things that far....I...shouldn't have......"
My mom's tears couldn't let her complete her statement. I feel tears rolling down my cheeks too.
I give my mom a tight hug.
"It's okay, mom."
"No, it's not. I literally separated you from your own father. I overreacted, Mia. I should've just forgiven him, at least for the sake of the love we shared and your sake too. He did tell me that it was a mistake but I didn't listen. I'm really sorry, sweetie. You didn't deserve to be denied of your own father. Please forgive me. I did a terrible thing."
"You were angry, mom. Someone told me that anger could make one not to pay attention to any other thing. It makes you lose your mind at the moment that you wouldn't think before taking any action. I've been there before and besides, you had a good reason for being so angry. It's okay, mom."
My mom pulls away from the hug and looks at me. She clutches my cheeks, wiping my tears with her thumbs.
"I'm sorry I lied about him going on a business trip. It's just that you were so young and I didn't know how to tell you what really happened. I promise to be a better mother and better person. I promise not to ever wrong you the way I've done on two different occasions. Mia, for you, I'll be better and do better."
"Mom, I understand your reason for not telling me the truth and you're already the perfect mother I need you to be. It'd be greedy of me to ask for more. We all make mistakes, mom. I don't think there's any amount of perfection that could make someone not to make any mistakes....even the slightest ones."
With a compassionate look in my mom's eyes, she pulls me into a tight hug.
"I love you, my beautiful baby girl." She says.
"I love you more, mom." I say.
We both break into a teary-happy chuckle.
"So, enough of sad stories. Tell me, mom, does Mr. Richards make you happy?" I ask after I pulled away from the tight hug.
"Well.....he does." My mom says, wiping her tears.
"How long did you say you've been seeing him again?" I ask.
"More than six months now."
"Do you love him?"
"A lot. After your father, he's first man I've ever loved so much and he loves me too."
"Okay then, you've my blessings." I say.
"What? So fast?"
"Yes, mom. I'm okay with the relationship....as long as you're happy. Your happiness is equally mine. I'm gonna have a little chat with Mr. Richards if I see him again, probably when he comes over again."
"I'm also sorry I didn't tell you about Colin earlier. I was scared you wouldn't allow it."
"Who am I to deny you of your happiness? You deserve to be happy."
"Thank you so much, Mia."
"It's nothing, mom but you're welcome though."
We chuckle.
"Now go to your room and do whatever you must. We're going out for some fun. There's a really dull atmosphere in this house."
"I'll do just that real quick." I say as I stand from the couch.
I give my mom a quick peck on the cheek before running off to my room.
************************************
"Mia!! Get down here!!" I hear my mom call out from downstairs.
I was just dressing up in my room after I had taken a nice cool bath.
"Be right there!!" I say loud enough for my mom to hear.
I rush out of my room.
"I'm here, mom." I say on getting down to the living room.
"Come to the door." Mom says.
I start heading towards the front door.
I can see my mom standing there. I guess there's someone there.
"Mom....."
I suddenly catch Michelle's gaze.
No....not her.....
I shift my gaze to see Amber standing beside her.
"It's nice to have you back, girls. I think we should have dinner together....if you girls don't mind." My mom says to Michelle and Amber.
"We don't mind at all Ms. Johnson." Amber says.
"Good. I'm gonna leave you with your friend now." My mom says.
She turns and looks at me before walking into the house.
"What's she doing here?" I ask Amber, referring to Michelle as "she"
"Mia, I'm really sorry for what I did. I didn't know what came over me to do such. I'm so....so sorry, Mia." Michelle says.
I've no idea of what to say to Michelle.
The little happiness I've had in me since I came here has just disappeared because of the unwanted presence of Michelle.
"Why didn't you tell me you were coming with her? You said it's just you." I say to Amber.
"Mia, I know things have been pretty rough between the three of us lately, but if you'd please just hear her out..."
"There's nothing to be heard from her." I say.
"I'm really sorry. I didn't know what I was thinking when I did what I did." Michelle says.
"Mia, please. Let's just end this disagreement and go back to being the best trio ever." Amber says.
"What're you girls still waiting for? Get back in here and make yourselves at home." My mom says from inside the house.
"I'm just gonna leave it here since my mom has invited you for dinner. You know how to lock the door." I say as I turn to walk away from Michelle and Amber.
Michelle's the last person I'd wanna see or talk to now.
Dinner time.........
We're now sitting in the dining room, my mom, Amber, Michelle and myself, eating a delicious beef and broccoli sauce with white rice.
The silence in this room could make one choke on their meal.
It's thick as hell.
I could hardly swallow my meal but not just because of the thick silence, it's because of how uncomfortable I am with Michelle's presence.
The things that has happened since after the end of semester party comes flowing into my mind, making me feel so uneasy.
My uneasiness worsens as the thought of Jace flows in.
I can't continue eating right now.....
With a little struggle, I swallow the beef and broccoli I had in my mouth and drop my cutlery.
"I'm full. Enjoy your meal." I say as I stand from the dining seat and start making my way to my room upstairs.
I barge into my room, quickly head for the window and throw it wide open for some air.
I let out a sigh of relief after I stick my head out from the window.
The thoughts about Jace is suffocating me. I feel so guilty for how I've been ignoring him not minding that he didn't do anything to me. I feel like crying right now.
Why am I doing this to him??
"What's going on, honey?" I hear my mom's voice ask from the entrance of my room, startling me a bit.
"No....nothing. I...uh...I'm fine." I say.
"You're not." Mom says.
"I'm really fine, mom." I say.
"I don't think someone who says "I'm full" after just few bites off a delicious meal is fine." Mom says.
"I'm...."
"Especially when the person is someone that'd normally finish that delicious meal and sometimes demand for more." Mom says.
"Mom....."
"Mia, you're my daughter and I've known long and better enough to know when you're fine and when you're not."
I exhale and drop down to the bench by the window.
My mom moves closer and sits beside me on the bench.
"You girls had a fight back in LA, didn't you?" My mom asks.
How did she know??
I look at my mom with a "how did you know?" kinda look.
"Ever since they got here, I've been feeling a strong tension between the three of you....a negative one. What happened?" Mom asks.
"Nothing, mom." I say.
"Well, it's not like I didn't know you won't tell me anything. Mia, did you remember what I told you on the day your father was buried?" Mom asks.
Does she mean the advice?
"I told you to always cherish every moment with your loved ones 'cause you don't know which would be the last for any of them or you and that no matter how you fight with them, that you should never forget the love you've for each other. Mia, I don't know what happened between you and your friends but you girls should make up, forgive each other for whatever you've done to each other and go back to being best friends. It's okay to fight but it's never okay to never make up. I believe I said something like that too. I'm gonna leave you now to think things through. I've a beef and broccoli recipe waiting at the dining table for me." Mom says.
I smile at my mom and she returns it with a wider one.
She gives me a peck on the cheek before standing to leave my room.
I lean backwards on the bench, staring directly at the pink dollhouse my father had gotten me on my fourth birthday, that's resting on the little table just across from my bed.
God I miss him....
I should really think things through like my mom said.
I don't know.....part of me wants to forgive Michelle while part of me doesn't want to. I really want things to be better, to go back to normal. I may be in the home that I've missed so much but I'm still bored and sad. I've missed the good times with my friends and most importantly, I've missed the good times with Jace.
What am I gonna do?