Lei had to rub his eyes twice before he could believe that Rory was there, lying next to him. Images of yesterday flashed through his brain and last night was barely sinking in as he sat up in bed.
He looked over at Rory sleeping peacefully, except he wasn't. When he heard Lei wake up his eyes flew open. Lei took in his every detail, silently watching as he smiled, and a ray of sun from the window lit up his face. His eyelashes looked like shining feathers, and his hair was wild and unkempt, just the way Lei liked it.
"What?" Rory asked after he had stared a little too long.
"Nothing," Lei replied.
"Say it." He cocked his head in question.
"Say what?"
"Just admit that I'm gorgeous." He replied arrogantly, making Lei crack up.
"You're gorgeous."
Rory darted his eyes to the side and a slight flush came to his face. For some reason, he hadn't expected him to say it, especially not in that tone. No matter how small the action, Lei still didn't fail to make his heart beat faster.
"Stop it!" Rory snickered and playfully kissed his neck and hands, as you would with a baby or a pet.
"Never!" He shot back.
"Dude, you haven't even stepped outside this room, I don't understand how you're only concerned with me right now. Don't you wanna go explore?" Rory shook his head, looking down at Lei beneath him.
"No, I've got plenty to start with in here... I waited so long- I waited every day, and I held back because I didn't think it would be possible for you to like me back. I thought you would hate me, I didn't even know what I felt."
Lei's gaze softened. He wished Rory could see himself the way he did. How did he not realize? He felt his chest tighten at the thought of all the pain they had caused each other.
"When I realized how I felt- When you showed me what I could have with you and then left, it made it even more unbearable. But we're here now, nothing will take me away from you this time."
Rory backed up as tears started streaming down Lei's face. "I'm so sorry. This whole time I blamed everything on you. I thought I could lock my heart in a cage, I thought I could forget it ever happened, and I hurt you in the process."
"Don't apologize. I did it too. I was willing to do anything to forget, but I was willing to do more to see you again."
"How- I thought it was impossible." Rory bit his lip with careful consideration. Would Lei be upset if he found out what he had done?
"Why aren't you saying anything?"
"I don't know if you'll like the answer." Lei knitted his eyebrows and changed his posture, growing visibly suspicious. "I did a ritual... From the book." Lei sighed, closing his eyes.
"Why am I not surprised? At least you didn't do anything bad, right?" Rory waved his hands like a little kid being scolded by his mom.
"No, no, not at all. It was way easier than I imagined. I have no idea how it worked. I did notice a few pages were missing before it though, so maybe there was something else to it. I just lit up a few candles, pinched my finger with a needle, and bam."
Lei squinted. "So is my boyfriend a cult leader now?" Rory froze.
"Boyfriend?" He shrugged.
"Well, then what are we? Am I not good enough for the perfect, handsome, Rory? Is it because I dyed my hair?" He replied sarcastically.
"No, I love your hair. You're more than I could ever wish for, I just didn't know you considered me your- I didn't know it was official..."
Lei scoffed. "Do you think I'd just act like this with anyone?" Suddenly a memory flashed before him. He tried his best to hide his panic from Rory. Hours before, I had kissed Maxine... Oh god, how could I forget? It's okay, it was just an impulse, it was just a kiss, it didn't mean anything. WHAT HAVE I DONE?!
"No, you can't, because you're my boyfriend now." Rory rubbed his chin jokingly. "Hmm, I've never had one of those before. Do you come with instructions?" Lei giggled incredulously, sweeping away his thoughts.
"Let's just go have breakfast already." Before he even set foot on the floor he hesitantly crawled back into bed. "Nevermind..."
"What?" Rory asked, already heading for the door.
"How do I put this? I don't really have food." Rory's eyes narrowed with sympathy.
"Lei,"
"We have a lot to catch up on, don't we? It's okay though! I have money now, we can eat in the city, I can't wait to show you everything."
"Yes, but tell me first, are you taking care of yourself? I can tell you lost weight. When was your last meal?"
"I had pizza yesterday... What I did while you were gone doesn't matter, I promise I'll be healthy now." Rory frowned.
"You didn't hurt yourself, did you?" He hadn't in a few weeks, Lei couldn't believe he knew that.
"How did you-"
"The scars on your legs, I know what those look like." There was a loud silence. Every time Rory tried to ask about his well-being Lei dodged the topic. At the start of their relationship, it wasn't very reassuring to think that they wouldn't have that honesty and trust, but surely he could fix that, right?
Lei rubbed his face in frustration and let out a sigh. "I think there are a lot of things that you still don't understand about me, just like there are things that I don't understand about you, but that's part of our relationship isn't it? If that's something you wish for then I can promise that I won't do it again. It's not easy for me to open up, please just be patient with me."
"Lei, I love you. It's obvious that I want you to be well, it's what I want the most. I'm new to this, I don't even think I've liked someone before. I just want you to be honest with me, I need you to trust me. Know that you can tell me anything, you can't just keep everything pent up."
Lei said nothing more while walking up to him and extending his arms. He avoided eye contact but Rory held him tightly. They had hugged before, but this was different. This hug felt like an apology, it felt like something you had waited for too long.
He didn't want to move. The pressure felt so soothing and safe, it was foreign and almost uncomfortable. Rory thought he was reaching for him but instead, he grabbed the closet handle and squirmed away from his grasp.
"That's enough sentimentality, there's a world out there waiting for you. I don't know what you're gonna wear though,"
"DO I LOOK THAT FAT TO YOU? I cannot keep tolerating these insults." Lei glowered, ignoring him.
"We're the same size in everything, except shoes, and my pants might look like capris on you-" He put his hand over his mouth but failed to suppress his laugh. Rory however, didn't seem amused.
He reached in and looked through the color-coded rack (color meaning black, grey, and green.) "Is there anything not emo?" Lei pounced toward the closet and shoved him away from his clothes.
"I'M NOT EMO. You lost your chance, you're gonna wear whatever I want now. Go take a shower." He demanded. Rory did not even bother to protest, it would be interesting to see what he'd look like in Lei's style, it was already hard enough to find things that matched his wings and hair, but that wasn't important right now.
He walked out with only a towel around his waist when he exited the bathroom. Momentarily he wished he had stayed inside, in the warm vapor. It was awfully cold, he shivered and wrapped his arms around himself as he sat down and waited for Lei.
"Look, I put these jeans away specifically because they dragged on the floor, I'm sure those will be good. And this sweater is one of the more colorful ones I have." Before Lei even pulled it out Rory began complaining.
"It's green." He groaned in response.
"BUT IT'S A CUTE GREEN. Look," He pulled out the jade-colored oversized sweater that had a frog sitting underneath a rainbow.
"IT'S A FROG!" Lei smiled and continued throwing things at him. He tossed a white dress shirt over Rory's head, took out rings and necklaces galore, topping it off with a brown crossbody covered in pins.
Rory simply laughed. "You're getting a little too excited with this." Lei shrugged.
"You did the same thing to me. What's your shoe size? I forgot."
"Ten and a half." Lei opened the door and headed toward Jian's room.
"Come here." Rory zoomed over behind him without question.
"Woah, your house is bigger than I thought." The door creaked loudly as Lei pushed it open.
"This is my brother's room, but he's been gone since last week, you can borrow his shoes for now."
"Where did he go?" Lei sighed.
"I have no idea. He'll be leaving soon though. We'll have this place all to ourselves."
"This house is already too big for me. Imagine how I'll feel when I step outside." Lei scoffed.
"I don't have to imagine. You have it easy, everything is already set up for you, but I had no idea where I was. I had to be worrying about stuff, I'm lucky you weren't some psycho."
"Maybe I am a psycho." Rory teased and Lei slapped him on the head playfully before getting ready.
"So what do you wanna eat?" Lei asked as the chilly breeze crashed against their flapping wings. The day was gloomy and cold, as usual on this side of the border. There were abundant plants and trees everywhere you looked, most buildings wrapped in climbing weeds, and the streets were lined with people that had wings of all sizes and colors strolling around freely.
Rory stood frozen with no response. He had never imagined seeing such a thing. One thing was being told that others like you existed and another was seeing it for yourself. This world seemed to fill him with life, something in the air was different than to what he had known.
"Maybe we can just fly around for now..." Lei giggled. Seeing Rory like this filled him with unmaskable joy. No matter what happens between us, if you're happy, I will be happy. He thought to himself.
"Excited much?" Rory swerved to glare at him.
"Hey, that's my line!" Lei laughed and took his wrist to guide him into the city. Rory grinned at the slightest contact of their skin. It felt so different, so liberating to finally accept how they felt for each other, perhaps that was part of what made this so exciting.
"Dude," Lei turned over to him attentively. "This is our first official date." Lei rolled his eyes.
"We're literally just flying around."
"Yeah, but we're together! I mean, it's not like I can hold your hand..." Lei looked down glumly but his expression changed when an idea popped into his mind.
"WAIT-" Rory winced at his sudden change of tone. "I'm wearing gloves." They gasped dramatically and exchanged a mischievous glance. "Try touching my palm with your finger." Rory did, and nothing happened. They couldn't even feel the rays there.
He hesitantly slid his hand into Lei's, for the first time without that feeling. They were both taken aback, barely touching and scared to push it any further. "But how? Your fingers aren't covered." Lei shrugged.
"Yesterday I noticed- I noticed that they seemed more controlled. Maybe there's something we're doing differently."
"I never thought I'd be doing this. Walking on the street, in another world, holding hands with you."
Lei smiled and squeezed his hand tighter. "I think I know a place. I don't know if it's open this time of year but I can check." Rory peeked over his shoulder curiously as he typed on his phone.
"A flower field?!" Lei nodded.
"They have a full area with just begonias. It will be nice to walk around and take pictures. We have to get breakfast first though."
"It's on me. We can go wherever you like." Lei stared at him with confused eyes.
"What?" Rory opened the bag Lei had given him and pulled out a band of cash with a smirk across his face.
"It was the closest thing I could grab when I came here, I left it in your drawer and you didn't even notice." Lei let go of his hand and examined the money.
"How much is in here?"
Rory snatched it and stuffed it back in the bag. "Like 80,000" Lei was dumbfounded. Who crosses a portal with cash on them?
"You can pay this time, but I just got money yesterday, you don't have to worry about that."
"Are you working?" Lei paused.
"I'll tell you about that once we sit down. There's a great bagel place on the next block, I haven't been there in AGES."
"I love bagels, especially in the morning."
The smell of fragrant, freshly-baked bread filled their nostrils causing both of their stomachs to growl in protest. The inside of the shop was warm and cozy with open windows giving a perfect view of the street.
The interior decoration looked like something of a seventies diner. Mint-colored booths, yellow walls, checkered floors, and metal lamps hanging above the table.
"Okay, we're sitting down now, tell me what your job is." Rory blurted impatiently. Lei wore an uneasy expression as he took a deep breath.
"I joined a band..."
"WHAT?!" Lei nodded and repeated.
"I joined a band. An all-girls one too." Rory shook his head in confusion at Lei's complete seriousness. "A few weeks ago when my brother left the house I realized there was no one else to pay next month's bills, there was no food, and I didn't have money."
"And then?"
"And then, I decided to go busking. I hadn't left my room, let alone the house for a week but it was either that or I starved to death, so I gathered my crap and went downtown. On 5th Avenue, a bunch of street performers gather there and my favorite band started on that same street."
Rory's jaw hung open in disbelief that Lei had been able to take so much action during that time. He hadn't opened the essence stand once in weeks. "That's crazy-"
"Hold on, I'm not even halfway through the story yet! I performed a song that I would like to show you when we're back, with time. It's a very special song to me. I never thought it would happen but people started gathering, and I got a good amount of cash. About 3 songs later a group of girls showed up, Maxine, Bonnie, and Liz. Max was REALLY scary at first but when you get to know her she's a lovely person. She's very outgoing and strong, she pours her heart into everything that she does and her voice is just amazing. Hopefully, you can meet her soon, and you guys might get along." Rory squinted as he noticed the way Lei talked about her. He seemed to like this girl very much. He wondered if he had only been imagining things.
"Anyway, she came up to me, and out of NOWHERE she's like: 'I want you in my band.' AND I WAS LIKE, WOAH, WOAH, HOLD UP. I just couldn't believe it, it was completely out of the blue. I don't know what she saw in me."
"THAT'S ALL SHE SAID?" Rory asked.
"YEAH. That was the same day you tried to tell me about the rings... Apparently, I just passed out after that, and when I opened my eyes," Rory's eyes were wide with attention.
"I was in their practice room."
"So they kidnapped you." Lei laughed as he took a sip of his chocolate milkshake.
"Yeah, kinda. They were so nice to me though, Bonnie even made me some tea and they welcomed me as if I had always been there. The band room is like a dream come true. They built it in a treehouse with a swing and string lights and when I tell you there's everything inside there I mean EVERYTHING. They have a whole bathroom and food, there's even a couch in there."
"You're an expert at being adopted by random strangers, huh?" Lei shrugged.
"In their defense, I was the one who passed out. They couldn't just leave me there, and by that time I had already agreed to be part of the band. Max said she thought it was because she told me I had to perform at the concert but I doubt it."
"WHEN IS THE CONCERT?" Lei paused.
"It was yesterday." Rory smiled at the ground coyly.
"So that's why you were all dressed up. I had no idea that you were so passionate about music. You never told me you wrote songs, I only knew you played guitar. I knew you could sing but I didn't think you put any thought into it. How big was the venue? I can't imagine how it felt for you."
"I told you when we met that my dream was to be a musician." He itched his head, Rory in fact did not remember.
"I'm sorry, I probably wasn't paying attention back then."
"It's fine, it's not something I ever brought up to you. Ever since I was little that was the only thing I wanted to be. Music and writing helped me escape to another world, I could disconnect and create something so beautiful. I would always close my eyes and pretend I was on a stage. There was nothing I wanted more back then, and yesterday night it finally came true, just when I thought I would break, every piece of me came back together... Including you."
Rory reached under the table to hold Lei's hand which rested over his thigh. They looked at each other warmly as Lei blushed but he slowly slid his hand away when he noticed a little girl with her glaring father who was pointing at them obliviously.
"Anyway- I'm sure there were a thousand people in there, it was full. We weren't the only ones performing but it was so much more thrilling than I imagined. The moment the curtains opened I knew that's what I was born for, and the girls are amazing at what they do. Max even let me sing my solo."
Rory smiled. "I've never seen you so excited about anything. I hope everything goes well and that you can keep performing with them. You NEED to show me your songs when we get back."
Lei nodded vigorously. "The best one I've ever written Is about you."
They fluttered toward the entrance which were colorful arches of flowers assembled to spell 'Wildfell Flower Fields'. The first part of it was a beautifully decorated garden that had old benches, fountains, and statues made of concrete. There were mazes of bushes surrounding them until a lilac and white wisteria tunnel led them into the open fields.
The colors seemed infinite as they curved around the hills and extended miles away. They stood between the columns. Some were small and round flowers and others reached their torso. There were bees and butterflies everywhere you looked.
"It's beautiful," Rory said in a half-whisper. Lei smiled from ear to ear.
"I can't believe it still seems so big now that I'm older. I'm so happy I have you here, there's no one else I could enjoy all these things with."
"Me too. I found no point in anything I did after you left. I didn't know how empty I was until I spent time with you. To be honest, I'm scared. I couldn't think of anything else when I crossed over, I didn't think about the possibility of not going back, or the consequences, all I could think of was being with you. We could call Lizu later, I'm sure they're watching us, and at this point, I don't think they were so bad after all. Maybe we didn't understand the help we were being offered."
"Maybe... But that's not what matters. Let's just focus on the present." Lizu peeked over the petals of the sunflowers and squinted before slyly dashing away and disappearing into thin air as if a door had been opened.
"LOOK, Let's take a picture with the sunflowers. They're as tall as me!" Rory giggled. "No, they're taller." Lei turned around to look at him annoyed as he backed up to get the frame of the picture.
"No, stop! I didn't tell you to take it yet." He protested while Rory had already snapped a picture with his phone.
"But why?! The best pictures I've gotten of you are when you don't know they're being taken. If I tell you, you start fidgeting like a fish out of water." Lei frowned.
"But I brought my Polaroid," He said quietly as he took the instant camera out of his small backpack. Rory clenched his teeth when he realized he had been slightly harsh with his words.
"Oh, my bad." He replied, reaching his arm out for the baby blue camera. Lei backed up and stood awkwardly between the leaves and petals, taking his hands in and out of his pockets with indecision.
"What do I do?" Rory shrugged.
"I told you it was better without you knowing."
He walked up to him and turned him three-quarters while Lei stumbled in his arms. Rory went back to his spot and analyzed the view. "Turn your head toward me slightly." Lei obediently looked at him, trying his best not to move around.
"Good, now put your hands around that flower next to you and smile at it." Lei raised an eyebrow. "At the flower?"
"Yes, Lei. Smile at the flower, like you just smelled it." Rory counted down and snapped the photo as the film slowly appeared at the top, showing a very light outline of the picture. He grinned while Lei peeked over his shoulder to take a look at the results. "Haha, cute. My turn now." He said scurrying over to the flowers and sitting down criss-crossed on the dirt beneath him.
"RORY, MY PANTS!" He shouted angrily while Rory made silly faces mockingly. "YOUR BUTT IS GONNA BE SMEARED WITH DIRT." Rory waved a hand dismissively.
"I'll wash them when we get home, it's just dirt and leaves." Lei sighed and got ready to take the picture.
"You don't need anyone to tell you what to do, you should be a model like your brother." Rory sprang up and shook himself off.
"I did think about it, he offered to take me to his events, but now..." His expression darkened at the thought of his brother. He had taken all of Radir's care and love for granted.
Lei set a hand on his back comfortingly. "Oh, Rory-" His eyes welled up but he quickly wiped the tears away and continued walking.
"It's fine," He said with a half-hearted grin. "Everything's going to work out, somehow."
"I hope Lizu doesn't let them feel your absence. Your mom will be worried sick. When I crossed over no one knew I had been gone."
Rory's eyes were filled with questions. "It wiped out everyone's memories of you on that side, except for my mom, she remembers you perfectly."
"I'm so happy she remembers me. Your mom reminds me so much of mine. I wish you could've her."
Rory was silent. "could've?" Lei did not reply but when he touched the ring on his finger something new happened. Both of their gems lit up slightly and Rory felt a wave of pain that seemed to transmit Lei's thoughts to him.
He touched the gem with his other hand and asked a question in his mind, without having to say it out loud. Did she pass away?
Lei made eye contact with him, in shock at their discovery, and responded. Yes.
How? Rory asked but Lei shook his head sullenly. "I don't know. I have no idea." He replied out loud, with a hint of desperation in his voice.
Rory took his hand and pulled him forward. "Come on, let's keep walking." Lei handed him the fully processed photos.
"Look, they came out so cool. I can't wait to hang these on my wall. We should take two of each so we can both have one." Rory nodded.
His eyes glittered as he saw the rows of begonias in bright vibrant colors. Orange, fuchsia, yellow, red, and white. "I told you there was a whole field with these."
"They're so pretty, we NEED to take one together." Lei made a worried face.
"We would have to ask someone for it to look good. There's no way I'm gonna go up to a stranger here." He said as he looked around for someone non-intimidating.
"Don't be a chicken." Lei looked at him firmly and still refused to move.
"Ugh. Fine, I'll do it. Excuse me," He called, walking up to a curvy blonde girl with green eyes who wore a floral summer dress and a pink cardigan.
She beamed at him awaiting instruction. "Hello, would you be able to take a picture of us, please?" Rory asked charmingly. The girl immediately took the camera.
"Of course!"
"Thank you!" He replied as he backed up to pose with Lei. He leaned his head against his shoulder while Rory held up a peace sign. The girl quickly snapped a few pictures and handed them back to him.
"Here you go,"
"Thank you," Lei told her as she walked away with her friend.
"You're welcome!" She replied with a warm grin.
"See, how easy was that?" Lei held the pictures in his hand, anxiously waiting for the image to show up. "I LOVE THEM!"
Rory laughed. "I do too."
"I don't know what to buy. All the prices went up." Rory walked beside him with his hands behind his back as Lei stood on the edge of the shopping cart. They scanned all the prices carefully.
"This is more expensive than over there, but we can make it work. Hop on, I'll take care of it. I'm the one that's gonna cook, anyway." Lei knitted his eyebrows with confusion.
"Hop on what?"
Rory snickered. "Get in the cart!" Lei lifted his feet off the ground and cautiously climbed into the shopping cart.
"I can't believe you're making me do this."
"Oh, be quiet, you know you want to." He teased as he tilted the cart up with his foot, making Lei shriek.
"STOP, I'M GONNA FALL." The people who were peacefully shopping gave them judging looks for making a commotion but they were unbothered.
"Give me the camera," Rory said while looking down at Lei who made a silly face and curled up in the cart.
"These people are gonna think we're crazy." Lei giggled.
"That's your fault, we're supposed to be buying groceries, and in all honesty, we are kind of crazy." Rory continued rolling him through the aisles.
"Pft, speak for yourself." Lei grabbed onto the sides of the cart and kicked the gate to hit Rory with a smirk across his face. He folded grabbing his stomach in exaggeration.
"OW!" He protested as he threw a bag of pancake batter at Lei's face. Their hysterical laughter echoed irritatingly through the small supermarket. They were the typical annoying teenagers who disturbed the peace and quiet of a public area as everyone around them wished they would go home, but Rory and Lei didn't plan to do that very soon.
"Lei!" They heard someone call down the aisle. Rory raised an eyebrow, looking at him for an explanation as he turned around inside the cart. It was Maxine.
He fixed his hair in panic and turned red. How would he explain this to her? He hadn't mentally prepared to introduce them. This is so embarrassing, I look like an idiot in here. Why is Rory making that face? Come on, Lei, get it together! He told himself.
She walked towards them, unconcerned by the awkwardness of the situation, and ruffled Lei's hair without questioning why he was inside a random dude's shopping cart. I can't explain things here, we're in a public place. If they hear us talking about stuff they'll call the police. I also can't tell her he's my boyfriend, we just kissed yesterday! What kind of a person would that make me? First of all a cheater, and second of all STRAIGHT.
"Hi." That is all he managed to say, despite his thoughts. Contrary to what Lei had expected Rory pulled his nice guy mask on and began talking to her.
"You must be Maxine," He said reaching out his hand to greet her which she scoffed before accepting.
"And you must be?" She looked down at Lei for further instruction before taking her hand away and wiping it against her jeans.
"Max, this is Rory-" He broke off.
"His boyfriend." Rory finished. Max's expression changed as she crossed her arms.
"Oh. Nice to meet you, Rory. He's talked about you before." She knew. Lei assumed his description of Rory had been pretty accurate for her to guess who he was.
"I- I know this must look very confusing, to both of you. I have to tell you what happened, Max but we can't talk about that here, it's not safe."
Max shrugged and headed toward the register with only cans of soda and chips in her hands. "Alright, see ya' later."
Wait. He wanted to say, but it was better like this. Was she upset? He couldn't tell, she always acted this way, but Rory was not pleased with the interaction.
"What was that about?" He told him. Lei grew visibly uncomfortable.
"Rings." He replied as he touched the stone and began communicating.
Don't pay attention to her attitude, she's like that with everyone, but I promise she's so much better when you get to know her. He paused as Rory nodded and continued tossing things to him. Milk, eggs, cereal, etc.
On one of our practice days, I told her about how I crossed and I said a lot about you. I told her how losing you affected me and that I hadn't realized the way I felt about you. Surprisingly she believed every single thing I said, but now I'm scared she's going to think I lied because she saw you.
Rory looked down at him with a mix of disappointment and sympathy. She won't think you lied. If you don't want to, I can explain but I don't think you should have to. It's your personal life, you guys have a professional relationship.
Guilt was consuming him. He wanted to shout it out, tell him how he had once felt about her, how he used her only for a moment to forget the pain Rory had caused him. She kissed me, first. He told himself, momentarily detaching his hand from the ring.
Yes, but she's also my friend, Rory. It will be great if you guys get to know each other, and the other girls too, I will be spending a lot of time over there from now on and I don't want you to feel bad because I'm not with you. I have a responsibility now, and I am glad you are here to help me through it.
Rory sighed. There was something Lei wasn't telling him. Something he wished he didn't know. "Okay," He continued out loud. "Just be careful with her. I don't think she's the best influence."