WE HIT 1M Y'ALL 😭 (I'll be posting an extra important announcement in a few days for now just thank you as it's the 1M chapter- this is the longest chapter I have written till now enjoy!)
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WEEK-6
I spent the entire week after the farmhouse, unable to get one moment of my mind. To make things worse, Alizeh had more things for me to think about after the shopping day. I was trying my best to not give her any hopes but sometimes there's just something in me that overpowers my resolute self. Like when I chose that saree for her, did I need to? No. But did I do it anyways? Yes. However, I made Dadi tell her it was Dadi's choice. Choosing that saree for her was not in my control, but not telling her it was from me, was in my control. In fact, I had to even snatch the bill away before she could see it, if she did, she would never accept a gift like that from Dadi even.
Alizeh had turned me speechless indeed, in the trial room, that was a new avatar of her. I swear this girl has more than ten personalities. One day she would be blushing because of me and the next day she has the guts to make me. I wouldn't blush of course, I never did, but keeping control wasn't that easy when all I wanted to do was pull her back to me.
She thinks I did not notice her taking a picture of us, I did, in fact I subsided the urge to hack her phone to get that picture for myself. If I could just ignore her, things would be damn easier for me.
Today is two days, after the shopping day, and I'm still thinking about it when I should be focusing on my project. Today was an important day for me, it was my chance to get my dream project, I opened my laptop, but there was no file. The meeting starts in an hour. I rummaged through everything, but nothing. Someone had deleted all my year's work. I checked through the CCTV cameras but yet nothing. No one could have done it in my office then. But outside office where?
One hour later, I sat in the meeting room with no project to display, after shouting at my entire staff. Someone had been stealing money from my company but stealing my blueprints of my project? That was unacceptable! Right now, Mahir Hadi stood in front of me, displaying my own project as his. I urged myself to be calm, anything done in anger only causes harm. I needed proof against him first, he wasn't just anyone. His family wasn't anything inferior to ours. Mahir sickly smiled at me as he got the project and I stormed out of the meeting room.
I controlled myself from breaking anything, I was a calm and composed person, not the one for violence and shouting. I made every decision of my life like it was a chess move. But always keeping my anger bottled up inside me was wrong, it would come out at the worst expected time which I would know in a few minutes.
The door of my cabin opened and Mahir got in, to celebrate his victory. "You always lose to me Zain Aziz" Mahir uttered his usual rubbish.
"How does it feel being second best to me, first it was your family and then it was her and now you even lost your dream project." But I pretended to not take notice of his words as usual but today he mentioned her, after years.
I had not once thought about her in the last five years. In fact, I had completely forgotten about her existence until he mentioned her now. Suddenly, the vision of our first meet flashed before my eyes.
FLASHBACK TO 10 YEARS AGO:
{ZAIN'S POV}
It was our last year in school, today was a school fair as tomorrow would be the debate competition. After beating several teams and school, we were in the final, each team had three members, ours was Mahir, Azaan and I. Those two had dragged me, to attend this fair which was taking place in the rival school, the one we would be competing against tomorrow. I was walking through the corridors of the school building which was restricted to all the students for the day, but I had to get away from all the crowd. I was looking for their library- I had heard they had the best library among all the private schools. When I turned round the corner to get in the library, I walked straight into someone, who in turn had been holding lots of small, stacked boxes which were about to fall along with her.
But I caught her and her boxes, steading her. "Thank you! You caught me!" She said loudly keeping the boxes on the table beside us. Now I could see her properly. She was wearing her school uniform- a total goody-two-shoes. Light brown twinkling eyes, wavy black hair tied into a ponytail and a sharp nose. Her pink lips however did not stop moving, she was saying something but I had gone into another dimension, it seemed like everything stopped and she was the only one with me.
"Excuse me-?" She snapped her fingers at me and I stepped back into the moment.
"I said thank you. Usually when someone says thank you- you're supposed to say welcome. But I guess it's fine. You're from the other school right, every single person I have met there is arrogant and spoilt anyways-" but I interrupted her, "Do you always talk to strangers so much?"
She rolled her eyes at me, and all I ever wanted to do for the rest of my life, was stare at those eyes. "So what if I do? If you don't want to listen then don't" she replied offended but there was a sound of walking footsteps towards us, and she looked at me with her big eyes, muttering, 'RUN' but she herself held my arm and dragged me to the library with her.
The library was actually huge, she dragged me behind one of the last shelves, pulling me with her, as she stood rigid against the bookshelf with me covering her.
"Why did you pull me like that! And why are we hiding? Are you-" but she interrupted me immediately, putting her hand over my lips, "Ekdam Chup! Shhh"
(Absolutely quiet! Shhh!)
The footsteps grew louder and she removed her hand from my lips, we could tell, that the person had entered the library, but it was so huge, I doubted he would get to us. But the girl in front of me had her eyes shut, I could freely admire her features. Just looking her took my breath away, my skin still tingled with goosebumps from where she had touched me.
After a few moments the footsteps retreated back, the girl in front of me, checked again and signaled me to come out, as she was now freely started roaming around the library. "Wait here for a few more minutes, to be sure, they have left. I'm pretty sure it's one of the guards. I hid us because we are not supposed to be here idiot! You're from the other school but me, I could get detention for this and mind you- I have the model student reputation here. I helped you only because you helped me saving my boxes. Shit! My boxes are out. I hope he didn't get suspicious about it though. You're welcome by the way." She said rummaging through the bookshelf as I followed her like a lost puppy. In this case, I was lost. But wait had she called me an idiot- I was used to being called the genius not an idiot.
"So what is the model student doing here breaking school rules?" I questioned.
"I just finished arranging those boxes which you saw outside, couldn't do it in the crowd. Plus I need to get books for tomorrow's debate competition against your school. I don't know who I'm against but I've heard they're really good. But yes one advice to you- if you want to bet on the winners, bet on me, I never lose." She winked at me, stacking two books in my hand.
"Too bad then there's a first for everything. " I smirked back. For some reason I carried her books behind her, it was as if my sense of control had been lost. I was used to girls gushing over me, but her, not her- was it too soon to say I was already whipped for this girl. The way she smiled at me, the way she moved her eyes, her sweet rose scent invading my air, everything about her.
"What do you mean? Wait are you!" She questioned.
"I'm the one you're competing against and I always win." I said leaning against the bookshelf with her books in my hand as she stared at me in disbelief.
"Haww give me my books back, I don't fraternise with the enemy and you can leave now I think they're gone. As for the win I already said I never lose." She gave me a tight-lipped smile.
"But I want to stay here." I said even before I could stop myself. I never even talked properly to people I knew but here I was hoping she would continue the conversation.
"Stay here with me? For what? I am boring." She said with humour but I could tell there was more to it.
"Then we have different opinions of boring because you're the most interesting person I have ever met." I said genuinely and she gave me back a little genuine smile.
"Damn so Mr. Arrogant can also be sweet, I am touched. But I have work to do. I am helping in the charity event today and I need to get there." She mumbled like she was disappointed. I followed her out of the library, she sighed thankfully seeing her boxes were still there.
"Tu n'as aucune idée de l'effet que tu as sur moi. Est-il trop tôt pour dire que je suis amoureux de toi cherié." I said my intrusive thoughts out loud.
(You have no clue the effect you have on me. Is it too soon to say I'm in love with you darling.)
"What? What did you say? I didn't get it." She raised her eyebrows at me.
"That's the point of speaking a foreign language." I flexed.
"Uff I can't even remember exactly what you said. I'm very smart understood, just say one more line so I know what language it is." She said with an arrogance which suited her.
"Je suis amoureux de vous" I smirked as she repeated it a few times to memorize it. I can't wait to see her reaction when she figures out.
(I'm in love with you)
"When I figure out what it is I'll reply to you the next time we meet." She replied cheerily hitting me on the head with one of the books as she took it back from me.
"I'll be waiting for that cherié". I said smiling at her for the first time. It was hard to keep a straight face with her, just her presence made me forget about everything else.
(I'll be waiting for that darling)
"You can smile?" She asked teasingly.
"Of course I can." I replied offended.
"You don't seem the type of person who smiles a lot. But you have a beautiful smile." She said softly, her cheeks red, looking at me with her own contagious smile. Was she blushing? I am the one having blood rush in my cheeks.
"What can I say it exists around a few people only." I replied. It exists around her, just her presence is making me smile.
"So what are you doing with so many boxes?" I asked her as she picked them up again.
"Just selling these to raise money for charity actually wait-" she held out one of the boxes for me and gave it to me, "As you helped me save all of this, I'll give you one for free." She said turning away from me. Fear thundered in my chest to watch her walk away as if I would never get her back.
"Umm wait- your name?" I almost shouted at the top of my lungs and she turned back, her hair doing a backflip of its own, she smiled at me like I was silly, "Its written in the note inside the box." She turned back, and drifted away from me leaving me with that box and the book she had hit me with that she had forgotten to take with her.
The next day, I got ready for the day, not because I was eager to get to the competition but because I was eager to meet someone. She arrived late that day and directly went to to her team. There was another girl and a guy with her in the team, they were joking around. I am not a jealous person but for the first time in my life, I wished I was in the place of someone else. Of course you can guess who won the competition.
She did, there was no lie she was extremely good at the debate, but maybe I play a small role, in not competing with her at all. Did I intentionally lose my papers right before the competition? Yes. But did I regret it? No. She stood there flashing her beautiful smile at me, as their team's name was announced as winners.
But Azaan and Mahir stood there confused at my act. "Why are you smiling we just lost?" Azaan asked leaving defeated but Mahir stayed back.
"You like that girl don't you?" He asked.
"What makes you think that?" I replied not directly answering his question.
"Because of the way you're smiling like an idiot seeing her. If anyone who knows you sees you like this will get a heart attack." Mahir replied.
"I guess I do- " but Mahir didn't let me complete, he started pestering me with questions which I had to answer.
After I finished, "Okay so she doesn't know your name, only you know hers, aren't you going to get her number or something?" Mahir questioned and I had thought of it but that wasn't really me, however even without waiting for me to answer, he went on with his planning, "It's okay I will get her number for my brother, after all what are best friends for."
END FLASHBACK
"Done with your rubbish you can leave." I uttered and sitting on my desk going back to my work, acting like I didn't care about what he said, even though it bothered me deep down. There was this heavy feeling in my chest, like a mix of feelings I hadn't dealt with and things I never said.
But Mahir never let an opportunity slide, he leaned in closer saying "Come on, Zain. Admit it. Losing her, losing the project, it's all eating you up inside."
"Leave!" I retorted, my voice cooI but jaw clenched. The mention of her reopening old wounds I'd buried deep. Mahir's words were like salt on a barely healed wound.
He laughed, a mocking edge to his tone. "Always the silent brooder, aren't you? But we both know, deep down, it gets to you. Losing her to me. You'll always lose to me Zain Aziz."
This was it. "If you don't leave right now then-" I warned, my voice tight with controlled frustration. He had betrayed me not once, but twice.
FLASHBACK:
{Author's POV}
10 Years Ago:
Zain being the introvert would never approach the girl himself however Mahir would, and he trusted Mahir.
Mahir went to her who was standing with her friend and introduced himself, but what he did not do was mention Zain in front of her. He started flirting with her, himself. Mahir was always jealous of Zain and instead of considering him as his best friend, he considered Zain his first rival. Whatever Zain wanted, Mahir wanted it next. He took her number but never gave it to Zain.
As the event was over, Azaan and Zain had left but there was dinner party later that night with their families. Mahir approached Zain feeding him with lies about how that girl had rejected him and wanted Mahir instead.
"I'm sorry Zain but I guess my charm is irrestible. She actually said even worse stuff about you but you're my best friend so I would never-" Mahir said.
"It's fine Mahir. It's her choice, whoever she likes, she doesn't owe me anything." Zain said.
"It's just not that it's the stuff she said about you- you know- she questioned why would she look at you with me beside you. Her words not mine. She even called you dumb. She said that she thought you were smart and you would be able to win but you lost so pathetically to her. The way she was saying all this in a snobbish manner I felt really bad for you. When I tried to tell her things about you she directly said she would never choose someone like you even if it was the last option for her. Actually she even asked me out but you know I would never betray you so I rejected her. She also continued saying she was really expecting a better competition. The Zain everyone keeps talking about turned out to be stupid." Mahir completed his pack of lies.
"Are you sure?" Zain asked taken aback.
"Of course I am! Zain I tried to say good things about you I wanted to clear her misunderstanding because I couldn't see her judging my best friend like this without even knowing you but she beat me to it. She kept insulting you and started complimenting me. She said she likes my personality and that you are nothing like you act to be. You're just good for nothing. The only reason a girl would be interested in you is because of your money. "
As we grow up, these kinds of words do have an impact on us, no matter who they are from. Things said as jokes even but this according to Zain's point of view were words said by the first girl his eyes ever fell on, unaware that they were all lies by Mahir created insecurities. However, he could not remove her from his heart because at the end of the day, you never have control over your feelings, even if it's unrequited.
He never tried to find her again or get her information, the only thing he still had with him, was the note and the book she had left. Often he glanced at the note, and the words written on it, as she had probably written one different for every box. They were very common words but for some reason they gave him a sense of comfort like it was a sign. Specially now that his school life was ending and he often ended up in arguments with his family for what he wanted to do next. The note served as an answer to all his questions he had been struggling with since the past few days in his mind. It felt like a sign like it was written for him.
He knew he wanted to go into the tech industry, he was aware of the losses and hardwork he would have to put thorught but the only thing he wanted from his family was their support which he never got.
In the next three years, he turned twenty, more serious than ever to accomplish his dreams. Mahir hadn't mentioned her again except for the first few months of their meet but he still held on to her for some unknown reason. He couldn't believe how someone who could write such notes for strangers could say such stuff about him.
When starting his company, he often looked at the words on the note, knowingly or unknowingly she did deserve some credit, for making him take the first step towards his dream. Hence, he cunningly kept the name of his company which at first glance, made people think it was after him, but in reality it was a sort of code of her name which only he knew.
By the time he was twenty-two, he finally started his own company, still struggling and learning. His family had never shown him any support but rather created hurdles for him in the way. The only people who cared even a bit for him were his mother and his grandmother. But his best supporters were his brothers. He came home later every night, working late when the whole world had gone to sleep. But his brothers Azaan and Kabir stayed up till he got home and had their dinners with him. When Ahaan came back for the holidays, he stayed up with them too, spending most of his time helping Zain. Mahir was already jealous of Zain, even though his company hadn't made a name yet but he would do anything to stop Zain from succeeding.
One day, when a very important project came through, Zain toiled all day and night, making it perfect because this would be his rise to the stairs. This was ever more important because Zain had made a deal with his family that if he wasn't able to establish his name in the next month he would give up his dream. The Aziz family knew about this project he just got too, but what they did was unexpected. Zain's father who desperately wanted his son back in the family business, was left with only one option in his mind. He thought of sabotaging his son's project just so if it failed, he would have no option but to finally give it up. Zain's father called his bestfriend- Mahir.
Mahir who could not believe his luck, was more than happy to comply. Arash Aziz only wanted his son back but in this process he would end up distancing him even more. Mahir of course made it seem like he agreed with the Aziz and only wanted what was best for Zain. Mahir was the only one apart from his brothers, who could access his work files on the laptop. Two days before the meeting, Zain found all his files deleted from his laptop. What Mahir wasn't clever enough to do was erase the CCTV footage. Zain questioned Mahir, in the Aziz mansion, as Mahir used to come over a lot as the Aziz treated him as their second son. When caught Mahir didn't waste a second exposing the truth.
"What I did was for your good. Have you looked at your condition. You're getting nowhere with this! Leave your stubbornness and get back to us. Look around you! You have everything already made for you. Why would you go around looking for investors! Do you know how defaming it is to our family name! Your dreams would never work anyways so it's time you get out of your dreamworld and snap back to reality!" His father justified. Zain who had expected a little bit of support from the other family members at least, all turned blind eye that night including his mom and his grandmother. In fact, they went on praising Mahir, for his support as his best friend and how it would have been better to have a son like Mahir than him.
Zain could not believe they could stoop that low, that they did not even realize their mistake for the first time he finally lost control of his patience and made a decision from where he never turned back. He left his family, his luxurious lifestyle and his house. Family isn't someone who gives you a shelter to live in. It's the people who shelter you with whatever they have.
A few days later, Mahir visited Zain who was still vulnerable. Zain had not forgotten his betrayal yet that Mahir had done with his father. Zain had thought Mahir had come to apologize but Mahir had in fact, come to add more insecurities on his plate. He came to inform Zain how he had finally started dating his first love. Zain hated the mention of her from his mouth. This was the second time Mahir had betrayed him. First with his family but now even after knowing about his feelings till date, Mahir said yes to date her? Wasn't that breaking the rules of friendship?
Zain who by now was aware of Mahir's real face, now thought of her words which she had said five years ago apparently to Mahir about him, 'Who would even choose Zain with you beside him Mahir." Now he could say she was right, his family had chosen Mahir over him. Yet again, she had now too. She was probably right, no one would ever choose him. After that day, Zain put the note, inside the book and never looked back at it again. For him she was a close chapter now, he hated Mahir and anything that associated themselves with Mahir.
Zain had to struggle even more, after he lost that project due to his father and his so-called best friend's attempt. But working harder than ever, he made it to to the top today. But somewhere in the process he had lost the happy him.
Meeting Mahir wasn't completely inevitable, whenever they met, he never missed a chance to poke him. After a few days when he saw it had no affect on Zain he had taken the trouble to announce to him, how they had broken up. But Zain didn't care anymore. He hated anyone who was related to Mahir, including her.
It had been ten years of their first meet and five years to the betrayal. He was telling the truth about how he had moved on and she hadn't crossed his mind until he brought her up, because yet for some reason it brought back her words and his biggest insecurity.
END FLASHBACK
Mahir tried rattling me even more as he leaned back with a smug grin. "If I leave where's the fun in that, Zain? I can see it in your eyes. You haven't moved on. But I heard you got engaged. Congratulations! Who's the unlucky girl?" Well that was a misjudgement- I had moved on, I had even forgotten what she looked like before he mentioned her today. I would probably not even recognize her because all I remembered was a school girl.
I was about to reply as Mahir's relentless provocations continued but I stopped. The glass walls of my cabin offered a view outside, and amidst the passing crowd, Alizeh stood, engaged in conversation with my receptionist. What is she doing here now?
The next moment Alizeh's figure caught Mahir's eyes as his expressions changed for a moment as he said. "What is she doing here in your office! Are you making her work for you now? Tsk tsk yet you are still obsessed with the one who is obsessed with me?"
Confusion clouded my mind as I followed Mahir's gaze, my eyes landing on Alizeh. "Have you finally lost that one brain cell you had?" I retorted back but then I suddenly remembered, during the truth and dare game hadn't we discovered Alizeh had a crush in the past, on a certain Mahir. For god's sake don't let it be Mahir Hadi, well don't let it be any guy if that guy wants to see another day but if it was him- that would be the last straw.
As Alizeh sat down on the sofa, her view was clearly visible from my cabin, the next moment the receptionist came in, "Sir I'm sorry, the ma'am outside is saying she is your fiancee. Should I send her in?"
"WHAT! She is your Fiancee?" Mahir asked me in disbelief as I gave my receptionist a curt nod not bothering to reply to Mahir.
"Damn so you finally got the girl I rejected. She's become even prettier, now I regret leaving Alizeh" Mahir chuckled as he mocked me.
"Don't even dare to take her name from your filthy mouth. Utter one word about her and I won't hesitate burying you alive." Anger surged through me.
"So possessive for your so called fiancee? As always, she too would chose me over you you know. Want to see a demo." He smiled sickly and left the room.
I watched from my cabin, as he approached her, he engulfed her in a hug. I got up from my desk walking towards the door with anger I never felt before determined to smash his face. But to my surprise, I noticed Alizeh did not pull away from him but when she did she was smiling and talking to him. Like everyone else even you proved me wrong Alizeh, I felt a deep ache inside me.
When Alizeh came in the next moment, she acted all normal, like nothing was wrong. Well nothing was wrong for her but for me everything was wrong. "Hey Aziz I got something to fix that grumpy face of yours." She said clearly understanding I wasn't in the best mood.
But I didn't care anymore, "Why are you here?" I asked colder than I meant to be.
"To meet my fiance" she replied cheekily.
"We met two days ago. You don't have to meet me everyday." I told her. She better not try acting like my fiancee when she clearly didn't mean it. Honestly I had no clue what she wanted at this point or what I had been expecting.
"I decided what I want to do everyday Aziz not you." She replied with same haughtiness she held.
"Why did you come without informing me?" I wanted her to leave as soon as possible. Today was probably the worst possible time for her to come. I knew I would have no control over my anger and the last time that happened I left my house.
"Uff why are you being extra grumps today? Is something wrong? Are you okay?" She asked acting concerned. Was she? Nope no one was ever concerned about me until it concerned them so I replied, "You don't need to concern yourself. If you didn't come here for anything important you can leave."
"I did come for something important. I need to discuss about the wedding." She said now tiptoeing on thin ice.
"Whose wedding?" I scoffed humorlessly.
"Our wedding!" She answered like I expected but wished she didn't.
"Alizeh just because I'm being nice to you doesn't mean there's any wedding taking place and what's that?" I questioned as my eyes finally went to the box she had kept on the table. It looked like some sort of dessert box.
"That- I made something for you." She replied almost as if she didn't want to but I was done. I couldn't believe this girl.
"You made something for me? What is wrong with you! For god's sake, stop it! Stop trying to act like my fiancee because I don't give a damn about you!" I finally lost it. I regretted it the second I said it, all my flashbacks, all of today's unfortunate events, the rage formed from seeing her with Mahir I had taken it out on her.
She looked at me acting like she doesn't care, but I knew I had hurt her, her eyes were shining with controlled tears, "Thanks for clearing that up." Saying these words she stormed out of the room before I could even prepare myself to say anything. What would I even say? None of this was even justifiable.
I sat down in my desk, closing my eyes, I just wanted to get away from everything. My eyes fell on the box, she had left behind her. She had probably spent hours on making whatever she made for me and I had made her leave my office. I opened the box, to find a blueberry cheesecake with a few roses on the side, with a note. I read the note.
"Having a bad day grumps? (I just put this in but I really hope you aren't having a bad day) so let's continue. Having a bad day? There's nothing my cheesecake can't fix and I'm willing to make it for you to fix your mood for the rest of your life. Appreciate it before I change my mind. Obviously you will be reading it after I'm gone because I wouldn't let you have it while I'm still here. <3
Your Zeh
I closed my eyes as thoughts raced through my mind. I couldn't get rid of the nagging feeling of shock and regret, remembering the last time someone had given me a note like this. Without knowing my feet carried me to the bookshelf in my cabin. I turned over all the books, the one I was looking for was rooted deep inside. I took the dusty untouched book and opened to the first page to find it with the note just how I had left it.
"Do it. Do that one thing you've been thinking about. Scared? Its okay everyone is but if you don't take the step you will regret it. Even if the whole world is against you, you'll always have a silent well-wisher on your side dear stranger. If no one believes in you then believe in yourself because I believe in you. Too cheesy right? Just like my cheesecake I know but I mean it. Good luck <3"
Your Zeh
The realization hit me like a sudden gust of wind, knocking the breath out of me But even though, the handwriting had changed, the stroke on 'z' the dot on 'i', the cursive 's' was exactly the same. I could see the uncanny resemblance in the way both of them talked at the speed of a bullet train. The light brown eyes which once captured my attention were the same. No wonder she had changed a lot in the last ten years but how could I miss recognizing her. Of course I didn't think 'Zeh' was that girl's name I knew it was a nickname or something but I never bothered to find out her real name. Now Mahir's words made sense, no wonder he was shocked seeing her here.
The memories flooded in- a rush of emotions. Alizeh was my Zeh. She was the one I had admired from afar. Fate had intertwined our lives in such a way I never saw coming, when I least expected, when I didn't want it. "Please don't be her Alizeh please" I silently begged. Once again I had chosen her out of everyone without knowing. It was her then and I had chosen her now again.
Confusion and disbelief whirled like a tornado in my mind. I don't understand when she was the one who rejected me now why is she acting like this? Like she actually wants to marry me, the things she keeps saying. She even brought me her special cheesecake and the note of course saying she wants this to last for a lifetime.
The answer was simple, she probably didn't know I was the same Zain obviously, or else why would she even choose me, she had made that clear years ago. There was no space in my life for anything related to that Mahir or anyone.
I put the the old note back in the book, along with the new one and closed the book. I wasn't going to reopen the book I had closed five years ago along with my heart.
CHAPTER AESTHETICS
Blueberry cheesecake
Alizeh's note
Zain and his Zeh in the library
Q- As we hit 1M what was your most favourite scene till now and why?