-x-
It had been over a week since you met the two-in-one alien, yet, sitting in the darkness with them here made it feel as if months had passed. Too much happening in too little time, and you were sure they felt the same.
The drawn feeling to protect them like you've known them for so long is hard to explain, but you aren't, in any form or shape, regretting or uncomfortable with the feeling. If anything, the feeling made you feel more alive than before.
You guess it gave you a reason. A responsibility, and not a bad one at that. You hadn't believed how much it mattered to make someone happy till it happened, and since then, you have been seeking more to help those you cared deeply about.
And now that you have it, you feel both worry and happiness bubble in your chest.
And, of course, an old, ugly man isn't going to take that away.
You spare a glance at the movie playing, willing yourself to stop having such thoughts now. Nothing interesting much was playing, but the light was appreciated in the dim room. It, at least, made it easier to see better.
Sun was eating crackers— probably because of it's lightweight to his stomach, and somewhat paying attention to the movie. Most of the things you had gotten were snacks both Sun and Moon enjoyed— It was a little trick to try and soothe them a bit with the sweets they liked, and so far, Sun was happily munching on the salted crackers and sipping sweetened milk. An odd combination, but whatever made him happy, really. This was the point after all.
There on the bed, you had multiple snacks for them to choose from, including those that are chewy, like gummy bears. Moon enjoyed chewing the little things with his teeth, and that was way better than gritting his teeth or biting things, so that's a plus too.
Taking a breath, you avert your gaze back to the blond, wondering a bit about how to start your next words. You guess it shouldn't be hard, not on your part, for sure. But you weren't keen on phrasing something the wrong way.
It was something they were going to be asked anyway, so it was better to be you than some doctor. At least, you hope so.
With that in mind, you call softly, "Hey Sun," They look at you. You look back with a gentle gaze, eyes trailing to their leg subconsciously. "I wanted to make a proposal for something."
This makes them tense up a little. Though, curiosity still lingered, and they ask, "What proposal?"
You hum, folding your legs on the bed to get more comfortable. Perhaps, before actually making the "proposal", you should clarify what you are proposing in the first place. "Do you know what a prosthetic is?" Well, people know what prosthetics are. However, little who actually know what it's called. It's a little odd, but you guess it being called a "metallic limb" is more appealing to some, especially if they didn't know it had a specific name. You don't blame people for not knowing this, of course, not everyone has to know about everything. You surely don't.
Sun blinks once, then twice. Confusion taking hold of their expressions. "Ah, the parts that are metallic but fused with an organic body?" He answers— more questions than answers, but it was correct regardless of that. For someone who hadn't been educated nor had internet access to search things, Sun and Moon seem to know more than you expect.
At the same time, however, they seem to not know as much as you expect. A lot of time they surprise you by not knowing what something is, either this, or it feels so foreign to them. They know a lot, but they also know too little. And, unfortunately, most of what they know are things that they probably learned about firsthand.
Like their collar. They knew they couldn't get it off, and if they did try, it will shock them.
You are still wishing it was something they heard more than them being a victim of it.
Shaking yourself from that trail of thought, you nod encouragingly to their answer. "Yes, you're right." You pause, watching Sun perk up at having gotten the answer right. "Would you be interested in one?"
The silence was a little heavy, if you would say so yourself. Sun's expressions shift into many— from confusion to realization then conflict. They look down at their leg. They knew they're gonna lose it one day, they knew from the moment it stopped hurting— All their thoughts were about how to adjust, but they didn't need that, they'd already adjusted with so much pain to spare. Both had accepted that they'd crawl their whole life, that if they didn't use a stick to stand again.
But this? They never thought of this. They never thought they'd actually live long enough after they realized the leg had gotten infected.
Another chance to walk? Never. It never got in their head, never breached the line of hoping for it, even.
"It's okay if you want time to think," Your voice comes in through their thoughts, cutting through like a knife. They looked at you, blinking away the haze. "Things like these take time to think over."
Sun opens his mouth, closes it, and then speaks in a whisper, as if speaking any louder will make someone hear them. "We can't have that," They shrug hesitatingly, picking at their fingers. "But that's fine, we learned to go without it for a while." It wasn't a lie, even if they found themselves falling down more times than not. They were used to that. They can still be used to that.
You look at them in confusion, not understanding if they had refused or if they weren't getting what you actually mean. "You don't want it?" You carefully ask, not wanting to push them or make them think you were "disappointed". Their rushed choice to agree on the surgery felt like so— it felt as if they agreed just to appease someone. You were hoping not to make the same mistake again.
Sun shakes his head. "N-Not that. We just can't have it. Too expensive."
A look of realization crosses your face. It was your turn to shake your head. It wasn't about the money. They didn't believe they'd be deprived of another thing, did they? The world had changed, for the better or worse, but it had changed. Prosthetics were as advanced as they could ever get, especially with other aliens' help. There are walking Androids around, for crying out loud! People can find spare limbs in a dumpster at this point. Prosthetics aren't as hellish expensive as they were decades ago, nor are they so rare to find or possess.
At this point in life, prosthetics could be mistaken for real limbs. With so much help, it wasn't so hard to give hope to those who thought they had lost it.
And you are determined to give this hope to these two.
"I will take care of everything, I just need your consent for it," You say, snapping yourself from your thoughts and taking your thermos in hand. Next time you look at them, it was Moon in control, surprising you. "Hey, Moony."
Moon's almost sleepy demure greets you as he fidgeted with his nightcap, not putting it on yet. "What's the catch?"
You fill a cup of your own, admiring the stream coming from the cup and warming your nose. "A hug." You look their way, offering a smile that is hopefully comforting and reassuring. "Moon. Dear. There is no catch. You deserve a second chance. You deserve to be happy. "
"I don't get it." He hisses out. Though, not in anger, but rather in confusion and conflicted thoughts. You could almost see said thoughts crashing over them just by looking at Moon's eyes. You can see so much, but you can't see all to understand everything. "There is no way you would so happen to like us this fast." He says, as if he wasn't the one wandering through halls to see if he could find you somehow. "You barely know us. I don't get it."
You're patient to explain, patient to show why, and patient to give as much reassurance as they need. "See, here's why." You take a sip of your cup, letting it clear your throat. "I live alone. It gets lonely a lot. Having company is nice. You guys are nice. And besides, I like making the people I care about happy."
Moon folds their arm, pouting in that way that just makes you want to hug them (you refrain, of course). The sippy cup now sitting in their lap. "I don't get why you like us so much... we're not that special." He says, mumbling the last part as if it was only meant for him to hear, but in the quiet room, you do too.
"Now there you are wrong." You lower the cup, carefully holding it in your lap. "I like the way you laugh— both are different but just as adorable. I like your guys' eyes, I love how they widen with joy. I like when Sun and you smile, sometimes soft, sometimes mischievous." You poke his nose lightly, earning a little gasp of surprise. "I admire how curious you are and how you always listen to me when I rant about something. I like how Sun vibrates when he's happy or when you blush blue when embarrassed."
Almost instantly, a bluish color paints their cheeks. They look down, lips pursed with embarrassment, the words catching them off guard and rendering them speechless. You got him there, silly little goose.
Your smile stretches at his reaction. "I find it amazing how smart you both are, how determined to learn. And I find it honorable that you even showed me a vulnerable side of you both, that you put trust in me. All of that makes me happy."
Apparently, rendering Moon to mush wasn't that hard, but they still search your face for something. That same searching— were they good at reading expressions by any chance? They don't linger, though, looking down at the sippy cup at hand soon after. "We... will think about it..." He looks shyly at your face again, hopeful, and that fills your heart with hope too. "Thank you..."
"You're welcome, dear." You say and watch Moon step back, letting Sun back in control. Conflicted expressions fall upon their face, features twisting with too many emotions. It was hard to pinpoint— it was overwhelming in a sense. The attention you gave was foreign, alienated from how they were treated before. The sudden change towards them was almost scary— to suddenly feel so much care. It felt like a trick— a ploy to lead them to a dead end, but they knew you wouldn't do that.
Even so, neither Sun nor Moon can stop these thoughts from building up. The soft touch made them feel safe and protected, but, at the same time, it scared them how new it felt. They carved it their whole life the moment they knew of its existence, but now that they had it? They don't know how to receive it— what to do as a reaction. Mostly, they let their body lead the way; to lean into the touch. At the same time, however, their mind feels as if it would explode if they didn't shy away.
It was new. Too new. They want it, but they aren't sure how to act when they receive it because they never thought they would ever have it.
It was comforting, they wanted more. But it was also overwhelming, no matter how much they craved for more.
They didn't know why they were feeling that way. It was easy— it's supposed to be easy. The thing they wanted was put right in the palm of their hand, but now they had no idea how much pressure grabbing the thing would break it. They weren't sure how to react. They weren't sure how to make the shudder up their spine disappear.
They still want it. Why were they feeling too overwhelmed by it?
And now, a new chance. A new hope. They just had to say the word— they just had to use their voice and they'll have it. Easy.
So easy.
It shouldn't be this easy. But you make it sound like it.
Crashing emotions washed over them like a tide, flooding their thoughts and Sun could do nothing but try to block them away. So, he hugs you, the sippy cup ignored for now. Everything else is ignored for now. It will be okay. It will be fine.
They just had to accept that, even though it was unreasonably hard.
"Thank you..." He mumbles, voice wavering. Their small arms squeezing quite hard around you. "You make us happy too..." Sun says, foregoing any other thought.
It's fine.
You're more than glad to see that smile again, returning the hug welcomely. "I am very glad that I do." You soothe a hand on his back. "Now, dear, drink your milk, it's getting cold."
"Oh!" His attention is immediately averted to the cup. Taking it in hand, Sun sips the honeyed milk. They stay silent for a moment, eyes watching the movie play out— it was quiet, peaceful. The vents cooling the room down. Somehow, this didn't seem as scary as it was before. Having an idea, Sun finally lets the cup down, taking a breath and bracing themselves before speaking. "Cuddle...?" Sitting the cup down, they make grabby hands your way.
Cuddles would make the overwhelming feeling go away.
Or it might make it worse. Sun just has to see.
You laugh lightheartedly, feeling it genuine and rattling your chest. Perhaps it was the way he said it, or the way he looked at you, or maybe the way he moved his hands, but it still made warmth flood in your chest. A comforting feeling that would lift any bad thought from your head. "Of course, baby." You assure, opening your arms welcomely for them.
Sun's rays wiggle, smiling giddily, and letting themselves be cuddled in your lap as you shift to sit on the bedboard, adjusting the pillow behind you. Reaching out a little, you drag the blanket over them as they settle down against you, sippy cup in hand, letting the warm sugary liquid wash their throat.
It was so tender and comforting that a surge of butterflies tickled their stomach, a feeling that only made them cuddle closer. It was safe. They were safe.
The dark isn't as scary anymore.
With a sigh, they finally let their muscles relax at last this day.
They have a big day tomorrow, after all.
-x-
You didn't sleep, not that your mind would let you.
It was a little weird, really. This isn't your problem to worry so much about, yet, here you were, wide awake and on your phone, cradling a sleeping Sun. The sippy cup half in their mouth as droll damped the collar of their sweater, something you noticed Sun doing before— Perhaps with how boneless and dead to the world he gets when he sleeps.
He is a silly goose, and you stifle a chuckle at that.
It hadn't been much, maybe three hours since you came. The movie had ended long ago, not that you were paying that much attention. Some snacks were eaten, but not much, Sun wasn't that eager to eat. Though, at least they didn't refuse the milk. They had gone to sleep almost two hours ago, cuddling close to you and, effectively, trapping you with them in the hospital bed. You didn't move, happy that, while the blanket was thin, the pillow was at least thick, so your back wasn't killing you.
You fix the IV from tangling as they slept, letting your body relax a little as the TV light softly lit the room. Vents from above were the noise now, as you had lowered the TV to almost mute. The light made the room feel almost nostalgic in a sense, but it was illuminated enough and that's what mattered.
You scroll through your messages, seeing some random reels sent in the family group chat— something so very random, probably from the family clown— Yep. It is. It made a small smile come to your face, and you react to the reel. While the group chat isn't that lively, all of you still send random things in it, especially your older brother. And— oh, speak of the devil.
—"hey squirm."
You glare at the message, debating if you should just ignore him, but decide against it.
—"What?"
—"It's late."
The reply is instant.
—"late? its 10." Oops, perhaps you shouldn't have said that. But oh well. Your brother continues his texting.
—"right. just wanted to ask how you been. everything okay?"
—"its a sixth sense to know, so spill the tea."
You snort quietly, not wanting to wake up Sun.
—"We don't have tea, sir. This is McDonald's."
A laughing emoji is sent your way.
—"so. how's it going?"
—"It's going."
—"interesting." He seems to pause. The words glare at you, and for a moment, you think he knows something you don't.
—"anyway. i got a date."
—"You? Are you actually my brother? Who is this?"
—"funny. but yes, i got a date."
—"don't tell the others, wanna surprise them."
—"..."
—"Interesting."
—"What will you name the first baby?"
Not a second after you hit send did your brother suddenly start texting.
—"gotta go. got a lot to work on."
—"be safe. do not summon demons."
—"or ghosts."
—"No promises :)."
You watch the online dot disappear. Ha, caught him on it. It's just a belief that your siblings need a little tease every now and then to show how much you love them. Sibling bonding at its finest.
A few chuckles leave you, low and quiet, and you exit the app and turn your phone off. Heaven were you tired and it was only ten, huh. That meeting sucked a little too much energy from you—
You look down to find red eyes staring up at you, the move not unusual to you by now.
You blink. "Moon?"
And, indeed, it was Moon. When had they woken up? And when did they switch hosts? Actually, no, Moon probably hadn't slept in the first place.
Moon reaches out to the nightcap, with a little difficulty in their position, and puts it on. Their silky soft hair falls over their shoulders and forehead as the blue nightcap presses lightly on their head. They say nothing as they drag a bag of gummy bears their way to open the package, chewing the little bears as if he had a grudge against them— Hopefully, Freddy doesn't see this.
Well, at least you could count on Moon so Sun wouldn't accidentally starve them. Though, you couldn't count on Moon to let them sleep. He was a very light sleeper, any movements would stir him awake, hence why he always stays alert when Sun sleeps. Unfortunately, it wasn't the best thing for their health.
Nightmares, Moon had said, nightmares hunt him down when he sleeps. Especially when he falls into a deep sleep, mostly from exhaustion. Poor thing was so sleep-deprived most of the time because of that. They always look so down and sleepy.
Moon pauses in their chewing, turning to you. They take the sippy cup in hand, presenting the cup your way. "Is there some left...?" They brush their hand over the droll on the tip, which only makes them realize the droll all over their cheek, making them slightly grimace. Though, by the look on their face, this was a habit.
You hum, reaching out for the thermos. "There is. Here." You take the bottle and open the lid, pouring the warm milk into the almost empty cup, before closing it. Moon wastes no time sipping from it, taking a few gummy bears in hand or whatever snack piqued his interest. And, after a little of hesitation, they lean back against you again, enjoying the heat that their body can't regulate by itself. "You alright, dear? Why are you awake?"
With the way they are sitting, you can't see their face, especially with how they like to keep the nightcap near their eyes. They don't face you as you ask, keeping their gaze either on the cup at hand or the TV. Other times it would linger at where their leg is hidden under the blanket.
You sigh. "Are you nervous for tomorrow?"
They shrug slowly, playing with the ties around their wrist, sparing a glance at the IV hooked in the same hand. Thankfully it wasn't itchy.
You wait for an answer, having much time to spare. They can take as long as they want to reply. Then, Moon mumbles something low, barely audible you almost don't catch it. "... Hug me?"
"Hug you?" You confirm. They nod. And oh, who were you to deny them? You lean to take them closer still in your arms, watching as Moon switches to burying their face in your chest, as if they wanted to become one with the warmth. You'll have to admit that it is a little cold, but hospitals are always like that. "Oh, baby, it'll be okay." Your soothing self immediately kicks on, using your hands to rub their back up and down, feeling how Moon trembled against you. "I've got you, dear, you're okay." You rocked slightly, cradling the smaller being in a gentle yet firm hold.
Wetness almost jolts you as Moon sniffles, letting his tears stain over your shirt as they wept. Babbles of something was said under and between their sobs, incomprehensible. You lean away to try and understand, but nope, it's all babbling. Something about being confused but grateful, or so you think it is. Words just seemed to melt over each other.
You fully lean back to cup their face, watching Moon's eyes open wide to look your way. The last time Moon was this open was at the hospital, which you were sure wasn't intentional. You have seen how Moon acts when he isn't under any pressure, and the way he acted before and after the hospital visit has a huge difference.
Perhaps you can help better knowing what you're dealing with. If you understood what you're dealing with, then you can know how to react. It was a little different how you acted towards Moon between the time in the hospital and post that. More than one strategy. In the former, you had used soothing words and reassuring gestures. In the latter, however, you used logic— like when you spoke with him on that movie night.
After tonight's little talk, you'd hope they understood a little about their selves. Or methods, to be exact. The look on their face is so distraught it broke your heart, and their words were being cut with sobs no matter how much they tried. You have a suspicion of what they'd answer, hopefully that way you'd know how to comfort them better without accidentally doing something that would make them shy away. "Sweetheart, if you could answer, how old do you think you are right now?" Hopefully it was the right question to ask.
Consent. You needed consent to guide you.
Moon jerks his hands around, seemingly unsure what to do with them, so you use a hand of your own to take them in, holding them close before he accidentally hurt himself in his haze. Those claws are sharp, after all. Moon looks anywhere but at you, letting their head fall. They weren't expecting the question, and before you can tell them that it was fine not to answer, Moon just sends a shrug your way.
Alright, this is fine. You guess it would be hard to know, wouldn't it? Every time they fell for it, they seemed so distraught and confused, as if they didn't know how they got here or how to act. It was worrisome, but now you both at least have a little bit of more understanding. Communication is key, it will make it easier for the both of you.
"Well, do you want to talk about it or continue to cuddle?" You rephrased instead, watching Moon twitch in his haze of anxiety— while Sun taps his fingers or pulls his rays, Moon would twitch, grit his teeth, or press his rays down to muffle sounds. Now they had the ability to drag their nightcap over their face too, hiding it from view. "Sweetheart, please do not hide." You plead, gently holding their face upward.
Cuddling it is, then. Very well. You'll give them all the cuddles they need and want. For these two, all the hugs and cuddles for these two and even then it wouldn't be enough to heal everything. But it was a start.
It is a start. A step further. A better chapter in life. If the little things like cuddles and praises and kisses could heal as much as it seems, then you will give as much as it takes.
You resume your soothing movements again, cooing words their way to try and calm them down. It seems they had been holding all their fear till now, and you feel warm knowing they trusted you enough to let you soothe them through it.
Their tears slowly ceased, and, reaching a hand, you get their cup again when their cries became sniffling. "Here, drink some. It'll soothe your throat."
Moon moves from pressing his face against you, peeking out from under the nightcap, and, seeing the cup, they make a grabby hand towards it. You shift your hold, cradling them sideways to let Moon's cheek rest on your chest, that way they can still lean against you but can drink easily. Holding the cup, you let them have it in shaky hands as they latch on to the sweetened milk.
You use the hem of your sleeve to wipe away the stray tears, rocking gently and cuddling close. Your hand caressed their cheek and up to their rays, the gentle touch warming their cold skin just a tad, just enough to make them melt into it. Your left arm supported their weight, holding them close to lightly rest your cheek over their head, completely involving them in the warmth they wished for.
It was secure. Safe. So safe and tender and foreign it made Moon want to cry all over again.
But he didn't. He was too tired to.
It takes a little while, not that you have anything else to do, but Moon finally calms down to close their eyes, relax their muscles, and further lean their body against you. You only stop moving when the cup falls from their hands, landing on your legs.
Finally. Finally Moon has gone to sleep. They'll need all the energy for tomorrow's surgery.
You take the cup and sit it on the table next to your bag, glad that no milk has spilled out. Then, you carefully gather the few snacks and shove them in your bag as well. It was tricky, not wanting to wake up Moon, but the poor soul seemed dead asleep. This had taken a lot out of them...
Checking the time, you decide to shift, laying down in bed and taking Moon with you. They cuddle close immediately after, gripping your shirt with an iron grip a sleeping person shouldn't possess, and mumbled something incomprehensible under their breath.
You smile, sigh, and whisper. "Goodnight to you too, Moon."