"This is Cobra reporting. In position. Bunny secured. Over."
The ringing in my ears is deafening as I stare up at Spencer in absolute horror, my knees buckling under me in complete shock. I hear Spencer's muffled grunt as I slip down from his firm grip, my vision pulsating.
This whole time?
I trusted him.
And it was all a lie?
"If only you just loved me back- we wouldn't be in this fucking mess," Spencer growls as he grabs me roughly once again. My heart is splintering in my chest as he hauls me up, dragging me roughly through the forest, my feet struggling to gain footing behind him. I don't have the energy to fight back, too consumed with disbelief, my mind reliving our entire relationship trying to figure out where I went wrong.
I had finally let myself trust a man again. Despite my heart telling me not to, I pushed past my reluctance to trust men in hopes of getting over Rick and finding happiness, and look where it got me. He's been working for Phillip this whole time- still fucking manipulating me.
Spencer drops me in surprise at the sound of an explosion, making me cry out in pain as I slam down on a pointed rock, my ribs and head colliding harshly against the sharp surface. Pain explodes behind my eyes as the air gets forced out of my lungs, making me gasp desperately.
"Stop being so fucking dramatic," Spencer snaps harshly, hauling me back up on my feet as my ribs scream out in pain. Spencer practically drags me past the forest line and across the bridge as I stumble lamely behind him, trying not to fall again and attempting to get a full breath of air into my struggling lungs.
Squinting through my slightly blurry vision, my heart sinks when I see Herschel and Michonne, kneeling in front of the tank, facing the prison yard. They got them too?
Fuck.
Spencer pulls me roughly across the grass towards them, having to shoot a walker in our way straight through the forehead, taking me by surprise. I'm not exactly sure why I didn't expect that. He was lying about everything else. I spare a glance at the fallen walker as we pass, the now-dead reminder of the lies Spencer told me.
"And the guest of honor!" Phillip shouts loudly as Spencer throws me down on the grass, making a whimper escape my lips at my body screaming out in pain. Spencer rips my arms behind my back and zip-ties my wrists together before pushing me to kneel beside Michonne.
I stumble on the rough ground, my knees clanging unpleasantly on the hard soil. Gulping in fear, I kneel beside Michonne and Herschel, my heart as heavy as lead in my chest in overwhelming misery.
Defeat consumes me as I glance at my family beside me, looking at me with despair. Herschel's eyes are sending me waves of comfort while Michonne's are filled with rage as she stares unflinchingly at Phillip. A sob suddenly wracks my body and I hang my head.
This is all my fault...
"Oh, fancy seein' you here Bunny. Did you like my gift?" Phillip asks lowly, his hot breath fanning against my cheek, sending a visceral chill down my spine. My bottom lip quivers as I tilt my face away from him in consuming disgust, that all too familiar Brain-induced fear tingling through me.
"Well, I guess it was two gifts! My friend Spencer here and that little rabbit. Spencer told me how you got upset when you found it and no one believed you," he breathes darkly, chuckling lowly, making my stomach churn, hating that I was right.
"Feel guilty Rick?" Phillip calls out, making me slowly rise my head, spotting Rick standing by the overturned bus, staring at us.
I can't make out his face, but he's shifting on his feet, clearly distressed. I close my eyes, looking away in dismay. I should've listened to what he said- his worries about Spencer,
They were right.
"You let one of my men stroll right into your prison- convince Cass that he could trust her- all the while talking to me, telling me every little detail I need to know about how to get back to you!" Phillip shouts, his words hitting me like bricks. How could I have missed it?
I raise my head to see Rick, who is still now, frozen in place. I wish I could talk to him. To apologize for everything. Tell him how I feel before it's too late. Blinking rapidly, my vision sharpens and I can finally make out his face, hardened with anger, his eyes wide as they stare at me in horror.
My eyes slide over to Spencer on my left, standing with his arms crossed, looking far too calm. Far too relaxed. I realize I can't recognize the man I was dating- his entire demeanor has shifted. From that easy-going and happy guy to a cold-hearted soldier. Spencer doesn't bother looking at me, a smirk pulling across his face as he stares back at Rick.
"Got anything to say, Rick?" Phillip calls, clearly getting impatient. My eyes find Rick once again, my heart breaking when I spot the rest of my family watching by the courtyard, far away enough to be safe, which is what matters most now.
Rick tilts his head to the side slowly, his chest heaving, eyes dark. I can tell from here that he's livid. I watch him carefully, waiting for him to say something, silently pleading he doesn't do anything to anger Phillip.
When it happens, it's so fast, I barely register what's occurring until the gunshot rings out beside me. I whip my head to the left to see Spencer collapse, blood spurting from his body crumpled on the ground. Shock throttles through me at my ex-boyfriend gurgling blood from the fresh gunshot to his chest.
Letting out a shuddering gasp, my eyes are wide as saucers as I look back at the yard to see Rick breathing heavily, lowering his gun.
Phillip immediately shouts at his army not to fire. The agitated army settles down, gaping at each other in shock. Some are clearly angry, eyeing their now-dead friend.
"Well. That was unnecessary. But he was expendable. And we're not done talking." Phillip shouts back at Rick, who is holstering his gun.
They begin to talk as I stare at Spencer's unmoving body, my heartbeat pounding loudly in my ears.
"What do you want?" Rick shouts back roughly, his voice taught with worry, making me break my gaze at what used to be my boyfriend.
"I want the prison. My people's new home. Now, you and your people have until sundown to pack up and leave. Or the three of them die. Well, two. Cassandra is mine." Phillip orders, making me gulp, trying to push past the overwhelming fear coursing my veins.
They can't just leave- not after everything we've been through. I've accepted my death. I did two days ago when I thought I would die from the sickness and here I am. But I can't let the rest of them die. I'll stay with Phillip if it means my family is safe.
"You can't just own someone," Rick growls, eyeing me nervously. My eyebrows crinkle with emotion as I stare back, tilting my head. Just do it. Save everyone else.
When I mouth 'It's okay.' to Rick, his face crumples with distress, shaking his head slightly. When Phillip speaks again, Rick's face hardens with anger.
"I have a tank, Rick. I'm not wasting my time arguing over her. Either you all die, or you and your people move. We need this prison and I'm giving you the opportunity to go and live. Take it." Phillip orders defiantly, his voice lowering with the seriousness of his threats. I eye his people surrounding us, wondering how on earth he manipulated them into this.
"We have children here. Some of them are sick, they won't make it out there," Rick argues, making a few of Phillip's army glance at each other. One woman, in particular, catches my attention as she blinks in confusion, worry clearly written on her features. Ah. He didn't tell them everything then.
"It's either trying to survive out there or dead here. Make up your mind, I don't have all day." Phillip tells Rick roughly, making him shift on his feet, clearly distressed, my heart hurting for him as I watch. How is he supposed to make this decision for everyone?
"And neither do you. You have maybe an hour of sunlight left and all this noise is just going to draw more of the biters in. I suggest you start packing." Phillip adds snarkily, his voice harsh. He's getting impatient.
Rick sighs, looking down for a beat, thinking deeply. He looks up, glancing around the army at our fence, desperation clear on his features. "We can all--" His voice cracks and he closes his eyes for a second before starting again. "We can all live together. There's enough room for all of us." Rick implores, his blue eyes bright in the sunlight as he pleads with these people.
"There is," Phillip admits. "But I don't think my family would sleep well knowing that you were under the same roof," Phillip argues, making irritation flash through me. That's rich coming from him.
"We'd live in different cell blocks. We'd never have to see each other," Rick offers, hope clear on his face. If Phillip agrees, I may get to live. Stay close to my family. But seeing the torture station he had in store for Andrea, I don't expect much.
"It could work," Herschel says, "You know it could," He insists, glancing over his shoulder at Phillip. I spare a glance at him and his hopeful expression. Oh, Herschel. Dread is spreading steadily through me. They are overestimating how reasonable Phillip is. If he wants something, he will do whatever it takes.
"It could've. But it can't. Not after Woodbury." Phillip says, and despite the fact that I know he will never give up, disappointment still flashes through me. "Not after Andrea," Phillip adds, making Michonne stiffen beside me.
"I'm not saying it's gonna be easy. Fact is, it's gonna be a hell of a lot harder than standing here shooting at each other. We don't have a choice." Rick implores, shifting on his feet. He's desperate.
"We don't. You do." Phillip says definitively, standing his ground.
"We're not leaving. You try and force us, we'll fight back. Like you said, the noise will just bring more of the walkers and they will bring down the fences and this place will be worthless. Now, we can all live in the prison or none of us can." Rick tells him roughly, his anger showing through.
My eyebrows twitch together in hope, that hope immediately getting suppressed at the sound of Michonne's sword being drawn behind me.
Phillip mutters something before bringing the sword to Herschel's neck, making panic flare up in me, my heart sinking at the sound of Maggie and Beth crying out in the distance.
"You, you in the ponytails, is this what you want?" Rick asks, singling out the woman I saw before. "I-is this what any of you want?" Rick shouts desperately, searching the army in the hopes that anyone will stand up to this.
"What we want, is what you got." A man in the tank grumbles simply. "Time for you to leave asshole!" The man shouts, and I know. Phillip got to them. There's no convincing.
I hang my head, the panic and overwhelming defeat becoming too much.
"I fought him before. And after, we took in his old friends. They've become leaders in what we have here. Now you put down your weapons and walk through those gates... you're one of us." Rick tells them honestly, and I can hear the uncertainty behind me. The shuffling of feet and muttering of Phillip's army.
I glance up, hopeful that Rick could be persuading them. "We let go of all of it, and nobody dies. Everyone who is alive right now. Everyone who's made it this far- we've all done the worst things to stay alive. But we can still come back. We're not too far gone." Rick declares definitively as he looks at Phillip's army. "We get to come back. I know. We can all change." Rick finishes, glancing at me once before quickly looking back at the group.
There's a pause, my heartbeat pounding in my ears in anticipation of what Phillip will say.
Then, I hear faintly,
"Liar."
before the horrific sound of metal slicing flesh and the screams of my family in the distance.
Gunshots erupt amongst the cacophony of screams, and my head turns in what seems to be slow motion to see Herschel's partially beheaded body slump to the ground.
Panic and overwhelming shock consume me and I can't comprehend what's happening as Phillip's men begin to fall, gunshots ringing out repeatedly through my faded hearing. I get thrown to the side, alarm surging through me before I realize it's Michonne. She grabs my arm, taking advantage of the army being distracted to escape with me.
Struggling to my feet, I'm following her blindly, my eyes wide with shock, scrambling after her, focusing on her figure in my shaking vision. All I know is that we need to get out. Get back.
Michone stops, and I realize she's using friction against the metal bumper of an SUV to break her zip ties. My heart is pounding in my throat as I watch her trip one of Phillip's men before taking his gun and knocking him out. I know I'm being useless just watching but I can't move. I can't even think, I'm just watching Michonne, frozen in place.
Michonne is shouting at me before she realizes I can't respond, quickly undoing my zip-ties for me. Metal crashes behind me, and I realize the tank has broken down the fence, making my heart sink, flinching at the sounds of explosions, knowing it's the prison being blown up. So much is going on, I can't function. And Herschel is dead. How can we get back from this- I can't do it, I just can't-
I'm violently thrust back to reality as Michonne slaps me, making me gape at her in shock, my chest heaving. "We need to go!" She shouts at me, her voice finally hitting my ears as I nod repeatedly. "Okay, okay, okay," I mutter, nodding, my cheek stinging, but feeling grateful for her because it worked.
Peeking over the edge of the SUV we are hiding behind, I see Phillip's army encroaching on the prison, shooting repeatedly at our people as the tank rips through what used to be our home.
Michonne grabs her sword from the ground, nodding at me, before sprinting towards the prison. Watching her go, I notice her racing past Rick and Phillip fighting by the overturned bus. The sight of Phillip on top of Rick, slamming his fist onto him repeatedly, sends fierce rage surging through me, snapping me fully to reality. Pushing past the searing pain in my ribs and my throbbing headache, I take off, running as fast as I can muster.
Scalding anger and protectiveness burn through me and before I know what I'm doing, I'm grabbing Phillip by the scruff of his shirt, yanking him back as hard as I can.
He tumbles backward off of Rick, letting out a grunt as he falls to the ground. As I try to back away from him, he kicks the back of my knees, causing me to tumble on top of him. Immediately, he grabs my torso to keep me securely on him as his other hand grips my chin roughly, his fingers digging into my skin.
Pain radiates off his iron grip, making me grimace, pure hatred burning through me as I glare back at him. Phillip rolls us over, switching his grip to my neck, squeezing the air out of my body as he presses me into the ground. I let out a wheeze as intense burning infiltrates my lungs, my hands scratching at his desperately as my vision begins to blur, my legs kicking underneath him trying to get free to no avail.
"No need to fight it Bunny. I'm just fulfilling my prom-"
He doesn't finish his words as he gets thrown off of me. I can't see what it is through my blurred vision, I just gasp up the air flowing into my lungs gratefully the second his hands are off my neck.
Still gasping full breaths of air, my heart pounding relentlessly in my chest, I struggle to my feet, watching as Rick wrestles with Phillip. Worry twists deep in my gut as I watch them fight until Rick throws Phillip to the ground. A body-wrenching gasp erupts from my mouth, my stomach throttling when I see Phillip getting skewered on a large metal shard from the watchtower he exploded minutes ago.
The massive thick strip of metal is bright red, sticking right out of the middle of his abdomen. Phillip gurgles weakly, blood dribbling from his mouth, his eye wide. Rick stands, his chest heaving, barely standing upright, looking down at him.
I rush over to Rick, offering him support, my arm coming around his torso to keep him up. Heartache goes through me knowing that Phillip did this to him. "Are you okay?" I question Rick, my voice raspy after being strangled, barely hearing myself through the chaos ensuing around us.
Rick nods, turning to me, my heart dropping at the sight of his heavily bruised face- one eye completely bloodshot and swelling steadily. My hand comes up to gingerly touch the good side of his face, raw emotion taking over me, making my bottom lip tremble slightly. Rick just stares back, his distorted and bruised face making me feel sick knowing that it's my fault he's in this way.
Needing to look away in guilt, I drop my hand and glance down at Phillip, still somehow alive on the ground, groaning in pain. I realize I find a sick satisfaction at the sight. Looking at the man who has tormented me for years now minutes away from death.
Even when I thought I escaped him- he's still been out there, manipulating me through the first man I trusted with my heart. And now he's going to die.
"Cass," Rick grunts roughly, making my head turn to see him offering me his revolver. My eyes meet his darkened gaze, an unspoken agreement going between us. Taking the revolver from him, I grasp the heavy metal, stepping away from Rick. I step slowly until I'm right above where Phillip lies, struggling in the grass, his hands fumbling with the shard of metal- futile in his effort to save himself. The funny thing is if he miraculously got off the shard, he would immediately die. Bleed out in seconds.
I check that the gun is loaded and ready before aiming it directly at Phillip's forehead. His brown eye slides to see me and he lets out a laugh, immediately cringing in pain as he does.
"Bunny... That's adorable. We- ugh- both know you can't do it. It's me," Phillip grunts weakly, blood dribbling down from his mouth down his chin, his mouth curved in that infuriating smile.
All the things he's done flash through my mind. The first time he hit me. The many many times in between. The last time. His endless threats. Killing Andrea. Everything with Spencer. Killing Herschel. My full-blown hatred seethes through my veins, tingling through my limbs, red growing in the edges of my vision.
"It's already done." I grit through my clenched teeth, squeezing the trigger, bracing myself for the recoil. I don't let myself look away as his forehead explodes in a nauseating mess of blood and brain, his body immediately falling limp. I find intense pleasure in the sight, pushing past the ringing in my ears.
He will never hurt me or my family again.
I stand there, frozen in place, my shoulders heaving, staring down at the monster who ruined my life. Watching as the color drains from his skin, blood pooling at the bloody mess of what used to be that infuriating face.
I'm afraid. Not because of him or what I did, but because I felt... good doing it.
"Cass" Rick grunts behind me, but I can barely hear him through the ringing of my ears, not being able to break my gaze from the man who tormented me for years.
"Cass!" Rick shouts, and I finally turn to him, an unfamiliar and unsettling feeling settling in my chest.
"We need to go- Find Carl-" He starts roughly, cringing and holding onto his abdomen for dear life. This snaps me back to reality. Our family.
I nod, immediately rushing over and helping him head up the gravel road to the courtyard, supporting his side as we go. He's limping badly, and I realize it's because of a gunshot wound on his thigh, making me feel sick. We just cross the threshold of the courtyard when Rick beings to speak.
"We need to stick together-"
Rick is cut off by the deafening explosion booming around us. I feel my body getting thrown and my vision is abruptly plunged into darkness.
—
When I wake up, my blinding headache is what brings me the most pain at first. Then when I open my eyes and see the destruction around me, the misery is suffocating. Groggily getting up with a cry of pain, I sway on my feet, finding myself on the far right side of the courtyard. I had been pressed up against one of the large concrete flower beds. Judging by the bruise that's definitely forming on my spine, I got thrown pretty hard against it.
Stumbling through the courtyard clumsily, I struggle to get a good amount of air into my lungs, my vision shaking and flashing in and out after that explosion. I desperately cling to the building beside me for support, my chest heaving in exhaustion. Leaning all my weight against the building, I search for my family with hope.
Looking around wildly, my eyes scan the lifeless destruction of what used to be our home, searching endlessly. Searching for Anyone. Friends, family, survivors, but I see no one through the smoke and crowd of walkers wandering in through the broken fence, flowing in and around the abandoned tank. I choke on a sob, my knees threatening to buckle under me.
We've lost it all.
Because of my mistake.
I hear the walkers groaning nearby me but I can't find the strength to care. If everyone's gone, there's no reason to be here anymore. I started out alone- desperate for a group to be a part of. And I found something infinitely better.
I found a family. That loved me. That I loved. And it all went to shit because of me. The reality of our situation suddenly becomes too much. It's unbearably suffocating. The agonizing headache throbbing against my skull, the excruciating pain in my ribs that burns more intensely with every breath, the overwhelming knowledge that, thanks to me, my family is gone. They could all be dead, blown up or shot, by the man who I nearly married. It's too much to bear.
Then-
I hear it.
Faint over the gargling and moaning of the walkers,
Judith. Crying.
In a second, my head snaps in that direction, suddenly very alert. Then I see it. The pink baby carrier, sitting in the middle of the courtyard, alone, small chubby arms waving in it. A few walkers turn at the noise, swinging their bodies around lazily.
"Oh no you don't," I growl protectively through my teeth, pushing off the building and grabbing the automatic rifle from one of Phillip's dead men. Pushing past the severe pain in various points of my body, I let out a raw and guttural scream as I freely fire into the crowd of walkers, drawing them away from Judith.
Once they all fall, lifeless once again, I stop, breathing heavily, blood completely soaking my clothes. Dropping the empty and now useless gun, I stumble over to Judith, who's lost her voice at this point, silently crying out, tears streaming down her little face.
My heart breaks for her and I unstrap her quickly from the carrier and grab the diaper bag beside her, slinging it over my shoulder. With Judith on my hip, I look around- desperate to find any other survivors, but the massive herd pushes through into the courtyard towards us, and with a sob of defeat knowing I can't fight without ammo, I turn and run, not looking back.
After running away from the prison, each step sending additional waves of pain throughout my body, I finally come to an uncoordinated stop in the woods, slumping against a tree in exhaustion. Judith gurgles up at me, blood smudged across her face from my clothes, sending a wave of nausea through me.
Rustling through her diaper bag, I grab a spare towel and carefully wipe her face clean, my hands trembling. I sigh in relief when I see Judith's baby halter in the bag. Placing Judith on the ground for a second, I quickly buckle the halter on my body, grimacing in pain when I graze my extremely sore ribs. Judging from my symptoms, I definitely broke one.
Grabbing Judith, I place her carefully in the baby halter so she's pressed securely against my body. Tightening the straps to secure her the best I can, I then crouch down, grab the diaper bag, and haul it over my shoulder, letting out a small whimper of pain. With my hand on Judith's back, making sure she's pressed up against me securely, I look around, desperately searching for my people.
Spinning slowly in a helpless circle, my chest begins to heave in panic at the empty and silent forest around me. Judith grabs my shirt, making me look down at her, hopeless tears welling in my eyes. She just blinks sweetly up at me, no longer crying.
"At least I have you. Right, Jude?" I ask softly, my voice coming out hoarse, my throat burning with every word. It's not surprising with all the smoke inhalation, being strangled, and screaming out for help.
Judith just blinks her beautiful brown eyes up at me, and I can't help but quirk a small smile, wiping the tears from my face with the heel of my palm.
"It's okay. We got this sweet girl. We'll find them."