"I think Niki is Yeji's son." I told Chaeryeong a day later, when we went out shopping for gifts, with Maddie and Yuna.
"What?" She asked and turned around to look at me.
I made sure no one else could hear us and pretended to look at a pair of shoes while talking to her.
"I did the math, and the last time Yeji saw her was in March, when they had sex. Then she leaves a few months later and gives birth to Niki in December, which is nine months after they had sex with her. And Irene has natural blonde hair, just like Yeji's father. Niki has brown hair."
"Maybe it's a coincidence." Chaeryeong said and I looked at her.
"I looked it up and there's little chance the baby has any other hair color than the parents."
"Then tell Yeji to do a DNA test."
"I don't think she likes that idea very much" I said.
"Do you think she'll like these sunglasses?" Chaeryeong asked, trying to change the subject.
I shrugged and she added them to her cart. crossing Yeji off the list.
I had been informed that every Christmas some of the fraternity guys and sorority girls exchange gifts.
Plus a couple of other people like James, Ning, Ryan, Chaeryeong, Ashleigh and Maddie. Yuna told me about it (since it was her idea three years ago) and I agreed.
And I was stupid, because I was about to spend my last seven hundred dollars on gifts.
I wanted to buy something for: Chaeryeong, Yuna, Maddie, Ning, James, Zayn, Josh, Jake, Yeji, Niki even and Justin.
The girls chose their own gifts, and for the boys I bought different video games (I knew exactly who wanted what), except for Niki. I bought him one of those remote control helicopters.
"Are we done then?" I asked them as we walked out of the video game store.
"I think you should get Yeji another gift." Yuna said, pointing to the lingerie store. "I know I'm going to give Ning something extra."
I shook my head because I literally had 25 cents left.
Yuna ended up buying sexy lingerie and god knows what else, before Chaeryeong hailed a cab and we could finally go home.
It was a couple of hours before the Christmas party. Which meant the other girls spent hours in front of the mirror and I took a nap.
When Chaeryeong woke me up, I took a shower and put on my makeup before getting dressed.
"You're going to freeze to death." Chaeryeong told me as we walked to the fraternity house.
"All the girls are going to wear skirts and dresses anyway, so I'm good."
She shrugged as I tried to balance all the gifts in my arms. It was snowing lightly, as it had been last week, but no real, steady snow.
We got to the house and I knocked on the door with my foot because neither of us had hands available.
Justin opened the door with a dimpled smile and a Santa Claus hat over his blond curls.
"Hi." he smiled and helped me with the presents.
We walked together into the kitchen and I smiled as I smelled the gingerbread scent in the air.
"Who stole the gingerbread?" I asked as I reached the kitchen, waving left and right.
"Haha." Josh said sarcastically from the stove as he pulled out a tray full of freshly baked gingerbread men.
"What's this?" I smiled, pointing to his apron.
"I bake." Said a deep voice behind me and I turned around.
Chris was smiling at me, he was wearing big oven mitts and a matching apron with Josh.
"Hi!" I said excitedly and he waved, wrapping me in a hug. "Are you staying here for the vacations?" I asked.
He nodded and I saw Seungmin come out of the living room wearing a sweater that I saw was too big for him, so it must have been Chris's.
"Hi Ryu!" Seungmin said and hugged me too. "You look amazing!"
"Thanks."
"So, how long are you staying?" I asked, trying to make conversation.
"Actually, we're thinking of moving here next year. I found a great Times Square apartment where I can go to work and Chris can do an internship." Seungmin said, leaning into Chris, and I wanted to throw up because they were too adorable.
"But, to answer your question, we're staying here until the 2nd. At a nearby hotel."
"Cool." I said and someone called out to Seungmin, which made him run away.
"It's a boy child." Chris told me and I smiled.
I finally walked into the living room to see everyone I knew spread out on the couch, couches and floor. Every frat boy had a Santa hat on, well, except for a certain pink-haired girl, who was wearing reindeer ears, probably to show off the color of her hair.
Yeji turned away from me, talking to Soph in the corner. I resisted the urge to roll my eyes at her flirtatious pose; chest pushed out in a little dress and knee-high boots.
Justin had already placed my presents under the tree, which was upside down, hanging from the ceiling for some unknown reason.
There was no room left on the couch, so I tried to sit on the floor and watch the Christmas movie everyone seemed to be watching. But I felt hands grab my hips and tug at my skirt. I turned my head to see Jake smiling at me.
"Don't worry, I won't get an uncomfortable erection if you sit on my lap." He assures me and I can hear a couple of people laugh.
I get up off his lap and cross my arms over my chest, debating who I should sit on.
"Can I sit on your lap?" I asked James after making sure Zayn was out of sight.
Where is Zayn after all?
I saw Yeji when I spoke to James, looking across the room until her eyes landed on me.
I turned my attention back to James, who smiled and turned me around by my hips, settling me in his lap and then placing his chin on my shoulder.
I leaned against his chest, staring at the TV screen, not really understanding what was going on in the movie.
"This is a boring movie." I muttered and James burst out laughing.
"Let's open presents before the food gets cold!" Yuna yelled appearing in the living room, followed by Ning and Zayn.
I could see Zayn looking at me like he wanted to kill me.
I got off James' lap and everyone started pushing each other, looking for gifts that had their name on them. No one knew who they were from, but they had a pretty good idea.
I received nine gifts: a Nirvana sweater from Zayn, a Batman sweater from James, a new cheerleader uniform from Maddie, perfume and heels from Yuna, Ed Sheeran's new album and an 'Eat a lot, sleep a lot' sweater from Chaeryeong, a sweater that says "I'm in trouble' from Josh, the complete Jake Kennedy porn movie collection from Jake himself, a new pair of Vans from Justin, and a pair of sneakers (probably picked out by Yuna) from Ning.
My eyes fell on the rest of the people in the room, still busy opening gifts. I noticed other gifts in my pile, in a bag.
I couldn't help but smile and roll my eyes as I pulled out an "I love Yeji" sweater.
I noticed that all the girls had one too, so it wasn't really anything special.
I hear the whistle to call a cat, so I look up to see Yeji taking off her tank top and putting on a sweatshirt with a "Y" on it. Judging by Soph's expression, it was hers.
She was wearing the "I love Yeji" sweater and I had to bite my lip to keep from laughing.
Everyone finally started talking about the gifts and I started reading the little Ed Sheeran booklet that came with the album, when I saw Yeji come towards me and sit down.
"Did you like the present?" She asked smiling.
"Yes. Very original. I always wanted a T-shirt that expressed my love for you."
She frowned for a second, but then smiled and handed me the bag.
"Double check it, baby." I looked at her confused and then saw a smaller box inside.
"It's not an engagement ring, is it?" I joked and she snorted.
"Wish."
I opened it and my eyes got big. It's the necklace with my initial from the Tiffany & Co. store.
"Holy shit! It's the... the necklace. But it's... really expensive, Yeji! You can't!" I said and took it out of the box.
"Just thank me and give me a kiss" She said and I smiled.
"Thank you."
I gave her a kiss on the cheek that she was pointing with her index finger, before asking Justin to put it on me.
"As you can see, all the girls have to wear my sweater today."
Yeji informed me a few minutes later when everyone had sorted their gifts into piles and had gathered in the kitchen to eat.
"Yeah, that's not going to happen." I said as Josh handed me a plate full of fries and chicken wings, probably from KFC.
"That's Christmas dinner a la Theta Delta Chi." She told me and I laughed. "So, why don't you wear my sweater? All the other girls have it. Even Jake, and that's saying something."
"Because I'm not desperately trying to get into your pants, Yeji."
She looked at me, before smiling.
"Hey, I'm not trying to get in her pants either!" Jake said, appearing next to me with his half-empty plate.
"Don't lie to yourself." Yeji and I said at the same time, which made us all laugh.
"Is this a challenge?" Jake asked, waggling his eyebrows in a sassy way.
"No?" I said.
"It's not like you wouldn't enjoy it if I made out with Yeji."
"I'm not-ugh! You're the worst, I swear."
Jake laughed, putting his arm around my shoulder.
"Maybe later, when we play spin the bottle." He said with a wink.
"What?"
"It's a tradition. After drinking a whole bottle of expensive wine, we all sit in a circle and spin the bottle, until people start to pass out or get bored." Yeji explained.
"That's what I call Christmas spirit." I said sarcastically.
"Hey, we're still on for tomorrow, right?" Yuna asked, appearing next to Jake and me.
"What's tomorrow?"
"Christmas dinner at her dad's house. We always go."
"Oh."
"You can come too." Yeji told me.
"Um, well, if you're just inviting me now, it's like..." I started.
"I forgot to ask you a few days ago."
"Oh. Well, I got a present for Niki, too. So it's good."
"Also, dress up because Irene is a real bitch when it comes to formal attire."
"Yeah. I think I'm going to wear your heels." I said to Yuna and she nodded, before turning and walking away.
We ended up in a big circle in the playroom a few minutes later, the TV playing faintly in the background.
"I feel like we're 14." I said to Jake who sat down next to me.
"Well, you're pretty close to that age." Josh told me and laughed when I showed him my middle finger.
I was a little annoyed when he made fun of me. I mean, it was funny at first, but now I got the feeling he really meant it.
The first to twirl was, of course, Yeji, and it landed on a sorority girl who couldn't have been more excited.
The rules were simple: if you don't want to kiss someone, you're out; if you have a problem kissing someone of the same sex, you're out; and you have to kiss for 15 seconds.
They made out for fifteen seconds, before she pulled away and the girl looked disappointed that it was all over.
It was her turn to spin the bottle and it landed on Justin. After they kissed, Justin spun it around and I was surprised to see it land on me.
He shot me a dimple and I smiled back, before we both got up and met in the middle of the circle. He cupped my face and I stood on my tiptoes, pressing my lips to his. He tasted sweet and smelled amazing, not to mention he was a great kisser.
We broke apart after fifteen seconds and I could see Chaer earning her eyebrows at me in a suggestive manner.
I sat back down and turned the bottle, which landed on Josh. He sighed, pretending to be extremely devastated by this and leaned into me, since we were sitting next to each other anyway.
Our lips touched and we kissed for fifteen seconds, until I pulled away. He was a good kisser, I had to admit, but I was pretty sure all the people there were good kissers.
"You're better than I thought." Josh said to me as he spun the bottle.
About an hour later I made out with Jake and the girl who made out with Yeji first. It was James' turn to spin (he had made out with Soph earlier) and it landed on me.
I stood up and he was kind enough to move closer to me, before putting his hands on my waist and kissing me softly. He tasted like gingerbread.
When we parted, someone announced that it was already eight o'clock and that some of them had to catch the bus/train/whatever to get to their real homes so they could spend the next morning with their families.
The last people left were our group; Yeji, Soph, Yuna, Ryan, Ning, Zayn, James, Jake, Chris, Seungmin, Chaer, Justin and me.
"So what are we doing for New Year's?" Soph asked once we were all back in the living room.
Soph was hugging Yeji and laughing at literally everything that came out of her mouth, and as much as I wanted to hate her, I couldn't. She was funny and nice and hell, even I would have gone out with her because she was attractive and outspoken.
"We said we were going to watch the ball drop!" Yuna said and Yeji agreed.
"And then we can party in our suite! It's right next to Times Square!" Seugmin suggested, looking at Chris, obviously excited.
Chris nodded, smiling and putting an arm around his boyfriend's narrow shoulders.
"It's settled then! Let's go to Times Square!" And attention was diverted from the movie to the New Year's Eve conversation.
"Are you coming?" I asked Jake and he shrugged, nodding. "Do you have someone to kiss at midnight?" I continued and he shook his head, smiling.
"Do you want to kiss me at midnight?" He asked, his voice full of amusement.
"Well, I mean, if you want to. as friends? I'm not kissing anyone anyway, so it might be fun."
"Okay, babe." He agreed and poked me in the ribs. "But you have to promise me you'll watch all the movies I gave you."
"Okay, discussion over."
I said and he laughed, I place my legs over his lap and ended up kicking him in the face time later when he tried to tickle my sides.
***
The next day, my phone ringing woke me up from my well-deserved nap. It was Yuna.
I groaned and answered, checking the time.
It was seven thirty and I started to panic, because I knew Yeji would be here to pick me up in less than thirty minutes.
"Yes?" I replied as I brushed my teeth and combed my hair at the same time.
"You just woke up, didn't you?" Yuna asked and I let out a snort as I spit in the sink and put the brush down.
I set the phone down on the sink and put it on speaker so I could put on my makeup and shave.
"Uh no? I'm almost ready- Fuck!" I yelled as I stumbled and accidentally scraped the razor against my skin.
Blood gushed from my wrist and I started to panic because it looked like I had cut myself.
I quickly wrapped some toilet paper around it and started putting on my makeup while Yuna rambled on and on about what I should wear. I just agreed with everything she said and twenty minutes later I was putting on the heels she gave me.
"We're on our way right now!" Was the last thing Yuna said to me before hanging up.
I sighed as I put on my earrings and then my parka, before grabbing my keys and leaving the dorm. I still had no idea what to make of the fact that I would be kicked out of the dorm.
The car was already waiting outside, and I waved to them as I climbed in the back next to Yuna.
All three were dressed formally and even Yeji was wearing a blazer, her pink hair hung over her forehead.
The house was large, actually a mansion, and I was not at all surprised to see that almost everything was made of marble.
We were greeted by Yeji's dad in the hallway, followed by Irene, who was holding Niki in her arms. He looked so cute in a tiny outfit.
"Ryu!" He exclaimed as I took off my jacket and a maid came to hang it up. "Santa came this morning!"
Niki told me and Irene placed him on the floor so he could walk over to me and tug on my dress.
"Come on, I want to show you my presents! You too!" He said to Yuna, and we both followed him to the elevator (of course), which took us to the second floor.
We were told that food would be served soon, so we should hurry. He showed us all his gifts and told me he liked the helicopter more.
I smiled and gave him a kiss on the cheek, but he wiped it and made a noise.
"Ew, you can only kiss Yeji!" He told me and Yuna raised her eyebrows, from her place on the couch.
This room was pretty big for a four-year-old; four times the size of my bedroom, with a big crib and thousands of toys.
"Yeji bought me all these toys." He said and went to jump into a pool full of colorful balls.
"He loves playing with balls," Said a voice from the door and we saw Yeji leaning against the door frame with Ning laughing behind her.
"Dinner is ready," She continued and Yuna stood up. "Get Niki and come downstairs." Yeji told me and disappeared.
I sighed and walked over to the ball pit to get Niki out of it.
"Come on Niki, dinner's ready." I told him and he raised his arms, in signal to take him in my arms.
I did so, and as we walked to the elevator, he grabbed my bracelet.
"It's pretty." He said and took it from me to look at it. "You have drawings!"
"What?"
"Just like Yeji! In the same place!" I stopped and took the bracelet from him.
"They're not, my little stripes were an accident, because I was clumsy."
"Oh."
I put the bracelet back on and pressed the button for the first floor. It was ridiculous; an elevator in a house.
I sat down next to Yuna, across from Ning, Yeji and Niki.
"So Ryujin, I haven't seen you for two years, right?" Yeji's father asked, and the attention at the table turned to me a few minutes into the meal.
I could see Yeji feeding Niki more food than allowed when Irene is not looking.
"Um, yeah. I think."
"You were Yeji's girlfriend back then, if I'm not mistaken?"
"Oh."
Irene gave me a quizzical look, before smiling bitterly and plunging her fork into the salad.
Yuna changed the subject to something more comfortable and I exhaled, finishing my plate. Everyone was participating in the discussion except Yeji, Niki and me.
"Ryu has drawings like you on her hand!"
Niki said to Yeji and I panicked, looking around to see if anyone else heard, but they were too busy to notice.
"What?"
Yeji asked confused, Niki pointed to his own wrist and Yeji turned to me, but Irene interrupted, telling her son to go wash his hands if he was done eating.
"I'm going out for a smoke." Yeji said, before looking at me questioningly.
And then I remembered that I told her I smoked too, so I might as well play along.
"Yeah, me too."
I got up and followed her outside after putting on my parka.
She leaned against the wall outside the back garden gate and handed me a cigarette. It was quiet and I felt a little uncomfortable.
After we lit our cigarettes, she let out the first smoke and turned to me.
"Show me your wrists."
"What?"
"Put out the damn cigarette and show me your wrists."
I crossed my arms over my chest and she sighed in exasperation.
Yeji took the cigarette out of my hand and stubbed out both on the floor, before pulling my arms out and pushing the sleeves up to my elbows in a rude manner.
She took off my bracelet and stared at the rough lines of skin. She said nothing, and I wondered if I should say they had been just an accident.
Yeji ran her thumb over them, biting her lip. It was absolutely mind-blowing to see her like that.
She didn't even know it had been an accident, but she really cared and I thought maybe, just maybe, she realized how much it hurts when someone you care about hurts themselves on purpose.
"Aren't you going to say anything?" I asked after a heavy silence. She frowned, letting go of my wrist.
"Why?" She asked.
"Um. It was just a-"
"You're too beautiful to cut your skin."
She said softly, and it took me by surprise because it sounded so genuine and was so different from all the other times she spoke to me.
Her fingers tucked my hair behind my ears as she spoke, and her hands were cold.
"You're too beautiful for lung cancer." I replied, immediately proud of myself.
She looked at me for a second and then pushed me against the wall and kissed me.