i got out the bed slowly. it's 5am and i have to get ready to go to rehearsal for the show. i'm honestly nervous but at the same time i'm not. only reason i'm so shaky is because of the scenes. it starts off intense like that.
he sent the lines with us last week so i'd been going over them since. the very first scene is a sex scene. so i just know onika is gonna be pissed that it comes in so strong.
a part of me wants to say that i'm excited but then i think about the way onika feels about it. that just throws it all out the window. of course i still have some thrill but i just can't be so happy knowing she's not.
but she did agree to be cordial with the situation. so that's a step. everyone knows that onika wont be cordial in much. she's an asshole sometimes. i know this won't be too easy for us.
"why you moving in slow motion?" i heard her grumble and jumped looking back. she was watching me while on her stomach, looking at me sideways. a huge sigh left me as i stopped my journey to the bathroom. "you trynna sneak off?"
"no baby....i have to go to rehearsal. we have to be there by 7."
"mm." was all she replied with and closed her eyes back. i huffed going in the bathroom to do my business. things like this...
i want her to be happy. like i understand why she's upset but i want her to understand why i didn't tell her so soon. kelly even told me to wait on telling her. all of us know how onika is. she's like a ticking bomb that stays ready every second of the day. so when something sets her off, there's no time for more ticking.
she just explodes.
and she didn't explode the day i told her which made me happy. she actually did something new and apologized to me even though i was wrong. it shook me completely.
i was prepared to be ignored for at least two days. that's why i ignored her like that after she did say sorry. but when i realized it, she was already in that office on that ipad.
it made me sad that she locked herself away like that. plus i was leaving and i needed a kiss before going out that door. it's only right.
"scoot over." i looked up from my hand as i brushed my teeth. onika had came in the bathroom as well and grabbed her toothbrush. she didn't say anything else, just started to get ready as well.
we even took a shower together without saying anything to one another. it was calming. she washed my back i washed hers. i could tell she was hella tired still.
she stayed up all night with the kids because they're sick. i'm not sure how rumi and kyri both got a cold at the same time. the two that will cry a river for onika.
so she kept them company until they fell asleep. kyri was on me for a good couple hours but once he noticed onika had rumi it was over with.
we're now getting dressed and she was putting on a suit while i just threw on a sweat suit. it's like the roles reversed. she used to be putting sweat suits on to take pictures while i got all fancy.
"where you goin?" i put my shoes on then watched her as she fluffed her hair up.
"i have a meeting with fendi."
"the brand?" i looked confused. she does know a guy named fendi so i had to be sure. but i'm almost positive that she's talking about the brand. her and the guy fendi haven't been on talking terms in a minute.
"yea."
"ok. i'll call your mom to get the kids if that's fine."
"no they're going with me. lyric is getting them ready now. she insisted."
"oh...but they're sick. how's that gonna work?"
"they're gonna be in the office. the meeting is at my building."
"ohh ok, that makes more sense. so i'll just call you on break or something."
"mmhm."
"i love you."
"i love you too." i starred her down because i thought she wasn't gonna put the 'i' in front of it. she's petty like that sometimes. i'll have to put her in her place so quick.
"kiss."
she turned and pecked my lips a few times before turning back. i grabbed my phone and keys before heading down the stairs. wasn't surprised to see rumi on the couch laying like she was dying. lyric came with a mug that had to be tea.
"bye, i love you guys. make sure you call me."
"will do. have a good day."
i gave them kisses before heading out the door. and they better really give me a call.
this is crazy. i didn't think it would be this intense. kissing this dude is driving me nuts. he's a sexy famous actor but i just can't find him attractive. having to moan and shit.... jesus. the fact that i thought it would be so easy.
we're moving on through with this sex scene though. why start it off so crazy? it's literally so many details. he has to suck on my neck and bite....i pray it doesn't leave a mark because onika will flip. plus we keep having to redo it.
i'm a bit light and i bruise easily. one little suck can leave a red ass mark. i pray i'm not put in a bad position when i get home.
"cut! marcus when you grab her here, put some force into it. this is supposed to be rough and nasty." the director came towards us. before he walked away he clapped his hands like he remembered something. "oh! you. ring."
my face showed confusion before i looked at my hand. oh my wedding ring. i've only taken it off for photo shoots...onikas gonna fuck me up! this shit gets worse and worse.
"it-its my wedding ring."
"are you married in this show?"
"no...i guess not."
"ring." he made grabby hands and i sighed heavily taking it off. i hesitated to give it to him for the fact that i don't think anyone would keep it as safe as i would.
"could you put it inside my bag please?"
"i will."
"c-can you do it now? i wanna be sure." i watched so hard. he needs to show me him put my ring inside of there. if it comes up missing or anything, i'll lose my shit. and i know onika will lose hers even more.
we went on with the scene like we never stopped and that ring was on my mind heavy.
hours later and we've gotten through half of the first few scenes. at least only one of them were a sex scene. it was on my mind the whole time. with onika on part of my mind.
i was getting my stuff together to go home when i remembered my ring. going inside my bag i dug and dug. my nerves skyrocketed when i didn't see it.
"hey! wait." i stopped the director. he nodded his head at me and i held my hand up. all he did was look lost. "my ring."
"oh it's in your bag." he walked away after that. my blood rushed. i started to empty everything out that bag right where i was. my ring is nowhere. i'm about to go crazy. seriously. like there's no way.
"my ring isn't in there." i gave up and walked to him. he glanced up at me before going back to the papers in front of him. "my ring!" my hands slammed down on the table.
"look...you saw me put the ring in your bag."
"and it's not in there."
"so what am i supposed to do? i did what i was asked."
i huffed going to look through my things once again. shaking everything, neatly putting it back incase i missed something. but my ring was nowhere. honestly i wanted to cry. because how?! i watched him put the ring inside the freaking bag!!!
walking to the car i bit at my nails the whole time. my nerves were running through me. hopefully onika just doesn't notice that it's gone.
but she likes to play with my fingers. there's no way she won't notice a whole diamond ring missing from my hand.
i pulled into the driveway and laid my head on the steering wheel. she's not home yet but i'm sure it won't be long until she is.
quickly going inside, i went straight to the shower. washing all that off of me. the amount of times this man had to grip me and toss me, i'm positive that i have marks.
as i stood in the mirror, i noticed a few. onika is gonna see those so quick. i'm already knowing.
"hey."
i jumped hearing her voice. she looked at me weird as i clutched my chest. my heart was beating beyond fast now. just knowing what everything could lead to had me on my toes.
no matter how calm onika claims that she is, there's always something in her that'll push. i don't want to push. i'm so scared right now. and i know she's just gonna yell but i don't wanna be yelled at.
"why you looking like that?"
"like what?" i mumbled keeping the towel tight.
"pale and shit. get dressed we're going somewhere."
"where?" i looked confused. it's 3pm i was gonna start cooking and stuff for the kids. i'm sure onika took them for food but dinner still needs to be prepared.
"to eat. we haven't went on a family eating in a while."
"oh...ok. give me a second." i turned around to close the bathroom door. that's already making her look at me funny because i don't close the door when it's us two. i'm making this so much worse by the second.
i took a deep breath taking the towel off and sighing. i do have a red mark around my waist from the grip he had but it'll go away by tonight or the morning. i'm gonna have to talk to them about that being that i have a wife. i can't keep coming home with marks on me.
after moisturizing and putting some clothes on, i put a little makeup on my neck where he had to bite me. that's a bit red, not much. i hate that everything shows so dramatically on my body.
leaving the bathroom i saw onika sitting on the bed. she eyed me real hard before shaking her head.
"i'll be in the car."
i groaned as she walked out. she's already trusting her gut. but i haven't even did anything so i'll just continue as so. everything that's happened isn't even my fault. so i can tell her.
after putting some shoes on i headed out with the rest. everyone was already in the car. i said hello before putting my seatbelt on.
onika let the kids control the music, something she didn't really do. so i knew she was feeling some type of way. i'm hating this already. every time i tried to touch her as she drove she would move my hand away.
it broke my soul! she know i need to touch her.
i placed my hand on her thigh with a little squeeze and she didn't say anything. just glanced at my hand before double taking. her foot hit the brakes making everyone scream and go silent instantly.
"where the fuck is your ring?!"
my heart dropped. i forgot. dammit.
"beyoncé don't piss me off."
"baby."
"you trying me, real shit. where is the ring at?"
"it-"
"why was it off in the first place!? you wasn't at a shoot that i was present for!! since when you take your ring off?!" she turned to me slightly.
"ma calm down." lyric whispered leaning up. i took a deep breath telling myself to say what happened because it's not really serious. it's not like i did something...
"beyoncé."
"i-i lost it."
"ok. bet." onika chuckled before starting to drive again. it was silent. the kids didn't even start with music anymore. i felt so bad that i lost the ring but it's not my fault that it's lost.
when we pulled into the eating place i felt my stomach tighten. it's the place we always go to as a family. it's like our little spot. the kids got out quickly while we sat in silence.
"i just don't see how you lost a perfectly fitted ring beyoncé. you took it off for real?"
"i had to for recording...i didn't want to."
"so how did you lose it bey?"
"i don't- i don't know. i told the director to put it in my bag and i saw him put it in there. so i don't know how it's missing."
"alright bey. just find the ring alright?"
"i will. i'm sorry."
"it's cool." she got out the car and i was right behind her. i feel so bad. i'm happy she didn't flip on me, just did what i expected. yelled.
we got our table and everything, the kids talking about what they were getting. they always end up getting the same thing every time.
"mommy i get dino?" kyri tapped my side and i looked at his menu. he wants the dino nuggets. his favorite thing is dinosaurs. i nodded before kissing his head and he smiled widely. "momma say i get dino."
lyric chuckled at him before the waiter came to our table. we gave our orders since we were ready. the amount of times we come in here they should know the kids by heart.
onika and i are the only ones that really switch it up. even lyric big self be getting the same thing. i don't know if this is kamerons first time here but she just got what lyric got.
"ma how was your first day?" lyric spoke trying to make conversation. i glanced at onika to see her sitting back in her phone.
"it was cool. everything felt nice, i didn't have any complaints."
"you meet any fine famous people?"
i chuckled shaking my head. everyone in the show is mainly men. there's only like three women there, including me.
"kameron how's the working with chelle going?"
i forgot she was doing that until i saw her shirt. she now works with chelle most of the time. turns out she's really good at that gaming stuff and chelle wanted to put her on her team. so she basically play games all day and win high scores to get money.
it's honestly cool. you get paid for doing something you love and is super fun. so it's a win win.
"it's real cool. i learned a lot from the people around me even michelle taught me some stuff. really an experience that i never thought was real."
"that's great. i'm glad you found something that makes you happy."
"thank you."
we participated in small talk the whole time. onika didn't really say much but i didn't force her to say anything like i usually would. when the food came out it went quiet at our table. we all ate like no one else was with us. that food was too good.
in less than thirty minutes everyone was done. onika seemed ready to go, so we got our dessert to go. i really wanted a kiss or something but i didn't get it so we just got in the car and headed home.
i'm ready to go to sleep.
"bey can you just chilllll." onika shrugged me off and i whined trying to hook back onto her. it's 10pm, she's been laying in the bed on her ipad for hours. i'm sure she's doing work but still.
it's dark and all i see is her face from the light of the device. i wanna touch her, i wanna feel her.
"can i lay on you, please?"
"chill out. for real. i'm trynna do something and you wanna keep touching on me. you know i'm irritated, i know you do. so leave me alone before i go in my office."
"i just wanna touch you."
"yo....hold my waist but as soon as you start doing the most it's over with."
"ok....i'm sorry onika."
"mhm."