"For fuck's sake just call her." Anna practically throws the phone at me.
"What?" I pretend to be clueless on what she could be talking about. She gives me an unimpressed look at my horrible attempt.
"I'm not doing it. I refuse to interact with her again and I have retracted the stupid idea of using her for our plans." I calmly respond leaning back in my chair.
"Okay."
"Okay?" That's all she is going to say.
"Do whatever you want. For all you know this woman could have been your future wife and you just left her at the hands of a horrible man who will sooner than later ruin her." Her words are stupid but they do hit a nerve.
"Don't say stupid shit." I speak and she nods before leaving my office.
I sit there, still like a dumbass as my eyes stay on the phone in front of me. I'm forcing my hands to not move and reach for it.
I haven't had any contact with Lucia in weeks. I realized how I was acting, and Anna was right. I shouldn't get attached and I shouldn't let her get attached either. I've been feeling fucking crazy these past weeks. It's almost as if I'm out of my mind. I get the strong urges to see her, to hear her voice. This never happened before so it is very foreign to me. I guess I hate the feeling because I know she will never be mine in any way.
I curse under my breath when I reach over for the damn fucking phone. I immediately look for her contact and without a thought that could stop me, I call her.
"Hello?" The sound of her voice makes me feel calm and I close my eyes at the feeling. I feel like an addict relapsing.
"Lucia..." What am I even supposed to say?
"Ace, nice to hear from you again." She's only making me regret disappearing from her life those weeks. I just hope she has been safe and well.
I wish I could tell her how good it feels to just simply hear her damn voice. I can't because it's not appropriate and she would probably be creeped out. I'm creeping myself out just at my own thoughts.
"I wanted to invite you out for dinner." It's all I can think to say because I need to see her.
"Tonight?"
"Yes, tonight. Just the two of us." I confirm while really and deeply hoping that she will accept. I want her and need her to accept.
"Okay. Just text me the information and I'll see you there." In that moment I hear a man's voice. Eric's annoying and stupid fucking voice.
"I'll see you later, Cat. Love you, take care." She sends kisses and hangs up on me.
I sigh throwing the phone on my desk and proceeding to rub my temples in a way to calm myself down. She just pisses me off but it's not her that pisses me off. It's the fact that she is married to that idiot and the fact that her words were meant for her sister and not me. Not even the damn kisses were meant for me.
I don't know what is wrong with me but I don't think there is any going back. If anything, I think I will only become worse.
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She walks into the restaurant and all eyes are on her. Everyone admires what a beautiful woman she is, and I am one of those people. This woman is just too perfect. Her husband doesn't even deserve to look at her or even breathe the same air as her.
She's beautiful, sweet, gentle, and everything anyone would want to be and everything anyone would want to have. I'm one of the fuckers that wants her but she doesn't belong to anyone and won't ever. Not even to her husband.
I stand from my seat when she is close enough and I pull her chair out to help her take a seat.
"Good evening." She gives me that big and beautiful smile that is unique and solely hers.
"Good evening." I respond just taking her in because it wasn't very pleasant to not see her for so long.
"Where did you disappear to?" She asks as we open our menus.
"Missed me? I thought you were faithful to your husband." I look at her, but she doesn't look at me. She's too busy reading the damn menu to put those pretty green eyes on me.
"I missed your company." She says it nonchalantly and I feel like I'm going to go insane.
She can't just say things like that to me. What is making it worse is the fact that she is obviously being completely honest.
"I just don't have friends or anyone to spend time with. I really enjoy your company, so I was a little disappointed that I wasn't hearing from you." She finally looks at me and I now feel like the biggest asshole.
"I'm sorry." It's all I can really say because I can't explain myself.
I can't tell her that I am slowly obsessing over her, and I can't tell her that I disappeared because I don't want to get attached to her and I don't want to hurt her.
"Don't apologize. You must have been busy, and I understand you have a life of your own. The world does not revolve around me." Oh, but it does. It seems that way now that she has come into my life.
"It's just that you don't make me feel small or trapped when I'm around you. I feel free and in a way you're like a breath of fresh air but in human form." That's not something I would expect anyone to tell me and I'm sure it's a compliment.
"I'm sorry for hanging up on you and for what I said earlier. Eric appeared and I had thought he wasn't home." She changes the subject immediately.
"Yeah, I thought that." I say just as a waiter comes to our table.
Lucia and I order our food and he takes the menus. When he leaves Lucia looks at me again. I now realize that I had kept my eyes on her the whole time. It's like she is hypnotizing me or doing some sort of magic to make me act this way with her.
"How can you handle being with someone that you don't love? Especially when he has another woman." I know it's none of my business, but it pisses me off that Eric didn't even try to respect her.
"It's easy when he spends most of his time with her. I don't have to do anything or say anything for him to be happy. I just have to exist and be married to him." She shrugs as if it's nothing.
"I just don't want him to embarrass me publicly or for anyone to find out about his affair. I'm okay with him being with her because she gives him the attention and care that I can't give him." She adds on and I feel some relief to know that she really doesn't give a fuck about the idiot.
I decide that I should change the subject. I don't want to ruin the night and I want to make it up to her that I wasn't around to keep her company.
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"Can I consider you a friend now?" Lucia puts her hands into the pockets of her coat.
A friend? A fucking friend?
"If that's what you'd like then of course." It physically pains me to accept it.
She looks at me with a small smile. "You don't like it but it's the most I can offer you."
It's like she can read my mind. I only chuckle because I won't deny that she is right. I don't like it even a little.
"Have you ever fallen in love or thought about falling in love?"
I shake my head in full honesty.
"Same except I have thought about love." She slightly laughs but it sounds a bit bitter. "I know it sounds stupid knowing that my life was basically already planned for me."
"I wanted to fall in love with someone and marry him for love. I wanted to have the most beautiful wedding and I wanted to have a daughter. We would have lived in the house of my dreams and basically I would be happy with my little family for the rest of my life." Her eyes sparkle at her thoughts and her subconscious smile is beautiful.
"I don't know why I ever let myself create such delusions. I cried so much when my father finally told me that I would be getting married." Now she looks so fucking sad and I hate it.
I want to help her now. I'm going to help her.
I am going to set her free from that idiot and I'll make sure she lives her dreams. I'm now determined to also take her away from Eric. I will make sure that she finds that man that she dreams of being with and that the idiot goes on to make her the happiest.
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