The longest chapter so far! There were a lot of things to tackle in this one, so it came out longer.
Hope you enjoy ❤️
Love,
~ShoamEmily
~
8th of July, 2009
Michael is 50, Angela is 45, and Jake is 46
Angela: Very loud bangs made me jolt awake in bed. I blinked, sitting up.
When did I fall asleep?
My head hurt like crazy, probably from my lack of sleep. I turned to look at my alarm clock; it was only 5:30 AM.
Michael wasn't next to me and I immediately freaked out.
"Michael?!" I asked into the darkness of our room.
"Shhh," he was standing at the door, his ear pressed to it. "Someone's trying to break in. Adam's checking it out. Stay put."
I threw the covers off me. "Mike, the kids."
"They're all in bed. There's a bodyguard in each room and Grace is with the babies. Stay where you are."
Another loud bang made me flinch and I got scared for my babies who were only a few feet away.
"Michael, please, let me check on our babies." I begged.
"No, Adam said to stay right here. Now be quiet."
The banging stopped. It was quiet for a few moments, then there was yelling downstairs.
"Mike, the babies..." I was on the verge of tears.
He closed his eyes, sighing, "Come on."
After putting on our robes, we tried walking across the hall as quietly as possible. Grace sat in the corner of the room with Leo in her arms, while AJ slept through all that noise in her bed.
Immediately, the nanny handed me my baby boy. I held him close and felt some relief.
More muffled yelling came from downstairs. Leo moved, letting out a tiny cry.
"No, baby, g- go back to sleep... Mommy's got you, d- don't be scared..." I cooed while placing kisses on his forehead.
More screams, along with what sounded like Adam grunting.
"Let me go!" that too familiar voice said. "I want to see my kids!"
It only took one look at Michael before he offered his hand. I still held Leo when we ran down the stairs.
Adam's nose was bleeding as he pinned Jake down to the ground, asking him to calm down.
"Jake?!" my husband and I said together.
They both looked at us.
"Adam, let him go!" I exclaimed.
"Sorry, Mrs. Jackson. No can do," Adam mumbled. "He tried to break in, taking out three of my men in the process."
"You did what?"
Jake rolled his eyes at me. His lip was cut open, knuckles bruised, and his cheek was swollen.
"Jeez, Jake," Michael rubbed his face. "What are you even doing here?"
"I came for Lily and Eri- OW! What the hell, man?!"
Adam tightened his grip on my ex's arms.
"Adam, let him go," I said, but Jake struggled against him some more, making the bodyguard do the exact opposite of what I asked. "Jake, stop fighting him!"
He looked me up and down, his eyes narrowed. "What's it to you?"
"Jake." Michael warned.
"Mr. Jackson? What should I do?"
"Take him to the study."
"Yes, sir."
The minute they were gone, my husband turned to look at me. "Hey, Angie, you okay?"
He held my hand. I didn't even realize it, but I was trembling. Leo fussed against my chest, so he took him from me.
"Y- yeah. I just- That was so-"
"I know."
"I really thought something was going to happen... To us, t- the kids..."
Michael pulled me into a hug, careful with our baby boy who was in the middle of all it, and managed to continue sleeping.
He let me cry for a moment as I let it out.
"You wanna go back to bed?" he reached to wipe my tears with his free hand. "I can deal with him."
"No, no, I wanna talk to him too. I need to know what the hell is going on in that head of his... You know how he called the day of the interview? Before that, when you found me in the study, he called too. He screamed and yelled, going on about how we exposed Lily and Eric... I don't think I've ever heard him raise his voice like that. I didn't even think it was possible."
"Gosh, Ange..."
I blinked my tears away, "I know, I know, I should have told you. But you needed to be in a good mood, Mike. You were already doubting showing them to the world, I didn't want to add to that."
He kissed me gently. I gave into it, just a little.
"You're the best, Angie. Always looking out for me."
"Mmhm," I hummed. "I'm gonna go get the first aid kit for Jake, okay?"
He let me go so I headed upstairs. The minute I entered our bedroom, my stomach turned again.
Crouching down in front of the toilet, I threw up. Then the pain in between my legs came back too, and I just wished to disappear at that moment.
~
Jake was sipping on a glass of water when I entered the study. His cheek got worse, as well as his mouth.
Michael tried helping him by offering an ice pack.
He had his hand placed on Jake's shoulder, but he shook it off, a look of distaste on his bruised face.
"She's the only one I'll talk to." he hissed at my husband.
Woah, he really is mad...
"He says he wants to talk to you, alone," Michael whispered to me after giving up on trying with Jake. "Are you okay with that?"
"Yeah, he won't hurt me."
He looked hesitant. "I don't know, baby... He knocked out three bodyguards."
"He won't hurt me." I said again.
My husband simply nodded as he placed a kiss on the top of my head, then motioned for Adam to leave.
Once they were gone, I took a seat in front of Jake, opening the first aid kit.
He cursed under his breath when I dabbed some rubbing alcohol on his bruises with a cotton pad.
"You really scared me, you know?" I told him. "I actually thought someone was breaking into my house, Jake."
"Your house." he snickered.
"What was that?"
"You say 'your house' like you're the one paying for it. Must be nice, huh? Having all that money... I mean, look at you. I don't even recognize you anymore. You look like an absolute queen," my ex-husband rolled his eyes. "Since when do you get your nails done? All those designer clothes and bags that you wear... And that silk robe. Are those your initials right there?"
He pointed to the left side of my robe, where 'A.J' was embroidered delicately over my chest. Michael had a matching one just like it.
"I bet he had it custom made, too. It's great, isn't it? Being married to a king, to have no worries, no thoughts about consequences."
I was absolutely shocked. What is going on with him?!
"Don't look at me like that, Angie. How dare you expose my kids to the world?!"
He was so close to my face now. "They had a normal childhood, and now that's gone."
"A normal childhood?" I asked, putting down the cotton ball.
I was angry now. No, furious. Who does he think he is, talking to me like that?
"They haven't had a normal childhood since you died, Jake. Losing your dad at 5 is not normal! So don't you dare lecture me about their childhood. What did you think was gonna happen? Did you expect them to be masked for the rest of their lives? They're older now, they didn't want to wear them anymore! And that is okay because they can make that sort of decision for themselves.
"You think I don't understand the consequences? I've been living like that for five whole years now. Having to sneak through back doors, not being able to go anywhere without security. A picture of my babies is worth at least 500,000 dollars, did you know that? I'd never wish that for myself, but this is my life now. I wouldn't change it for anything because I get to be with the most amazing man, and have a family with him. You wanted this for me, right? You told me he'd take care of me, of the kids, that's exactly what he's done."
It was silent for a few moments as I continued to tend to his wounds, until he decided to speak again.
"I regret making that wish. I regret not coming back to you..." Jake whispered, moving closer to me.
"What are you doing?" I leaned back, away from him.
"Something I haven't done in six years."
He grabbed the back of my neck before his lips collided with mine.
It was rough, and not at all enjoyable. He tasted like really strong alcohol.
I quickly got out of his hold, my hand flying across his face as an instinct. He groaned loudly while he held his cheek.
"What the fuck are you doing?!" I wiped my mouth. "Did you drink? Oh, Jake... You- you've been sober for 21 years..."
It all makes sense now, the way he's been acting. I knew there was a reason he'd act like this.
He scoffed, "And?"
"Are- are you taking anything else?"
"Why do you care?"
I tried reaching for him. "Jake-"
"Don't touch me, I don't need your pity," Jake backed away. "Maybe I should pity you. You're the one married to a junkie."
That one got me. I was so close to screaming at him, but realized he didn't need that right now.
"I'm gonna ignore that because you're drunk, hurt, and need help. Adam can take you to a hotel in town. I'll let Michael know." I said.
With that, I left the study, closing the the door behind me. Michael was waiting right there, along with Adam.
"All good, Mrs. Jackson?"
I nodded, "Can you take him to a hotel? He can't be here. Oh, and can one of the guys stay there with him? He really shouldn't be alone right now."
"Of course. I'll get a car." the bodyguard smiled slightly, then left.
Michael came up to me and examined my probably tired face. "You're bleeding, did he hurt you?"
He brought his thumb to my lips, blood coming off them. I realized it was probably Jake's from the kiss.
"No, uh, Jake he-"
But he already figured it out himself. I could see the rage in his eyes, "I'm gonna kill him."
"Michael, please, wait," I begged and placed my hand on his puffed chest to stop him. "He drank. And possibly took something else too, but I don't know. We need to get him help."
"He drank? Woah..."
"Yeah, I know."
With a sigh, he hugged me as tight as ever; promising we'll get Jake the help he needed.
~
Jake: Adam dragged me into my hotel room, which was honestly more like a suite.
I plopped on the bed, obviously too drunk and tired to do anything else.
"Mr. and Mrs. Jackson will come see you tomorrow. This is Bill," he said, introducing the other bodyguard. "He will stay the night with you, to make sure you don't do anything stupid. I've asked the hotel to take out all the alcohol from the mini bar, and not to refill it. I will arrange a rehab center for you here in London, where we can keep an eye on you. Are you taking anything else other than alcohol at the moment?"
"No." I lied, and tried not to look at my duffle bag on the floor.
Adam obviously saw it, so he picked the bag up. He rummaged through it, finding the two pill bottles and shoving them in his pocket.
"Get some sleep." he left quickly.
Bill took a seat on the couch; he looked at me, saying the same.
I scoffed and closed my eyes. Then I felt vomit come up my throat and ran to the bathroom, where I spent the rest of the night.
~
Knocks on the door woke me up. I could hear it open, then Angela's voice.
I was against the bathroom wall, my head pounding.
"Jeez, Jake, it stinks in here," Angela covered her nose when she came in, Michael following close behind. "Take a shower. Then we'll sit down and talk."
They both looked so tired. She left, but Michael stayed put.
"Adam showed us these," he held the pill bottles in his hands. "Demerol? Really, Jake?"
"I came full circle." I shrugged, slightly smirking because I knew that hit a nerve.
He scoffed, "It's not funny. You have kids to think about, Jake. A job, people who care about you. Us, your family. How could you throw all that away?"
"You're not my family. You stole them away from me."
The minute I said that, I regretted it. My best friend took in a deep breath and turned to leave.
"I will pay for anything you need to get better. I will help you, like you helped me all those years ago. And you will get better, or else-"
"Or else what?"
"I won't let you see Lily and Eric ever again."
"You- you can't do that." I stuttered.
"I can, and I will. Angela agreed to it, too. They can't see you like this. We won't allow it." he faced me, and looked me straight in the eye.
He still held the pill bottles in his hand, playing with them.
"What are you gonna do with those?" I asked.
Without hesitation, Michael came my way and opened both of the bottles. He dumped their contents into the toilet before flushing.
"Take a shower, we'll be waiting in the living room."
~
Angela had her face in her hands as Michael rubbed her back.
"Why would he do this? He threw 21 years away." she asked.
"I don't know, baby, but he seems way off..." he kissed her forehead.
I cleared my throat, making her look at me. Angela had the most sympathetic look on her face. Michael, though, didn't even bother to lift his head.
"Sit, Jake," he ordered calmly. "And start talking. Tell us how you got here."
Unwillingly, I sat down. "Well, uh, I think it started back when Kim found out. She promised not to tell anyone about our situation, then never talked to me again. I felt so alone... You were all here, and the one person I had there was gone. I started spiraling... Especially since Lily and Eric talked with me less because you two were busy. I had my first drink when we went into town last month.
"It really escalated from there... I'd sneak bottles onto base. Then a few days ago, when the interview aired, I lost it... I got my hands on some Demerol and took some. Martinez, my roommate, he found out about it, told our captain and I was immediately dismissed. They gave me a new passport and identity, told me to buy a ticket to Florida and go start a new life there. But I came here... I needed to see Lily and Eric at least one last time."
The tears burned my eyes at how badly I screwed up. Michael's right, I threw everything away.
"Adam will arrange for you to stay here until you get better. Okay? You'll get better and see them once you're clean. We'll come visit you all the time." Angela promised.
"Okay." I agreed, knowing I have to do this for my kids.
~
Michael: After checking on Jake, Angela and I headed for lunch with Kenny Ortega.
She agreed to join me, although I could see how tired she was.
"Other than the music cues, some sync problems with the dancers, and the technical issues, we're good?" Kenny asked and wrote it all in his little notebook. "You were amazing last night, MJ. Really."
"I know, thank you. Make sure everyone is ready to rehearse tomorrow." I said.
Angela cleared her throat, "In two days. You need to rest, Mike."
She had that look on her face I knew all too well.
"So in two days?" Kenny smiled.
"Two days." I sighed.
My wife squeezed my leg and left it there. She then went on to ask Kenny if he enjoyed himself yesterday.
Every now and then, she would trace her fingers around my knee.
It surprised me, the way she was handling this lunch and Kenny, as if the last 12 hours never happened.
Like we didn't have any problems between us, and Jake, the pregnancy... Anyone else would have a nervous breakdown, yet she seemed fine.
It still bothered me that she wanted to keep the baby. I understood her guilt, I really did. But it was not worth it, risking her life.
Doesn't she understand that I need her?
Kenny laughed at something Angela said, making me snap out of it. I joined their conversation, and hoped we could get through this, too.
~
I leaned against the nursery doorframe, watching Angela as she rocked Leo to sleep on the rocking chair.
When we came home after lunch, she never let him go. She spent the whole day playing with him and even stayed next to his crib when he napped.
I figured last night's events really shook her. Even I got scared, although I knew our security team wouldn't let anything happen to us.
"Mommy loves you, so, so much... You are such a blessing, baby boy." she whispered while placing soft kisses on his forehead.
"Is he asleep?" I whispered.
She looked at me, "Almost."
AJ was sleeping peacefully in her 'big girl' bed, like she called it, her favorite stuffed animal under her arm.
"Can you imagine it, Michael?" my wife said. "Another baby... Like these two rascals..."
I laughed quietly and crouched in front of her. Leo's eyes were closed, the pacifier in his mouth hanging out a bit.
I offered to take him. After putting him in his crib, I turned to Angela.
Going down on my knees, I hugged her stomach, then lay my head against her lap.
She hummed softly, combing her fingers throughout my hair. "I love you, Michael. We'll pull through this, too."
"I won't survive this if you die, Angela." I sniffled as I tried holding in my tears.
"I won't. I'll do everything I can to have this baby and not die." she promised.
Angela leaned down to kiss my temple. She left her lips there when I finally cried, my tears falling on her thighs.
"Let's go to bed," she kept kissing my skin. "We both need it."
I lifted my head to meet her very tired eyes. She leaned down to kiss me. With that, she took me to our bedroom and took both our clothes off.
She led me to bed, holding me until I fell asleep.
~
14th of July, 2009
Michael is 50, Angela is 45, and Jake is 46
Michael: We were backstage again.
Just like last week, Angela arrived an hour before the show starts so the kids can spend some time with me.
The babies joined us, too, but Grace was taking them home soon.
Maria and Joseph came to get the kids this time around.
"You ready?" Angela asked once they were gone. "Yesterday's rehearsal was amazing. It's gonna be perfect."
"Perfect is a big word..." I murmured, not wanting to admit I was nervous more things might go wrong tonight.
"Well, I think it's gonna be perfect."
She leaned up, then kissed me, a bit roughly, "Besides, I thought you're always ready..."
I groaned into her mouth when she unbuckled my belt and opened my zipper. Her hands hurried to pull down my pants before she went on her knees.
"Angie, we don't have time for this." I bit my lip.
"You sure? I think we have enough time... You gotta relax before the show..." she looked up at me with a smirk, removing my briefs.
My wife placed small kisses all over my thighs.
I could feel myself getting hard, and threw my head back when her tongue licked my tip at first.
Then, she took me in her mouth completely, before going up and down.
"God, baby..."
She went faster, and it made me forget about everything I worried about. Angela sucked, licked, did everything she could to make me go over the edge.
My fingers pulled on her dark hair when my high built up slowly. A few minutes later, she moaned against me as I twitched.
I pushed her head down even more, "Angela-"
But I wasn't able to finish my sentence because she sucked harder, the pressure being unbearable.
"Fuck, baby, faster! I'm right there-"
She grabbed my thighs tightly and obliged, her nails digging into my skin.
I wasn't able to hold it in anymore, so I came into her mouth with another loud groan.
Her tongue ran all around one last time to leave me clean, standing up as she swallowed.
"Are you relaxed now?"
Out of breath, I nodded, "You know I am."
"Good," my wife looked proud of herself and helped me get dressed. She kissed me again as her hands worked to fix my belt. "Good luck, Mike. You're gonna kill it."
A knock on the door interrupted us, it was Kenny, saying it's time to get ready.
"Don't forget these, Angie." I took out the necklace I made her, along with my bracelet.
Angela kissed me once more and I held her tight. I let my hand go to her stomach, caressing it gently.
She smiled at the gesture. "We'll see you out there."
~
"I love you!" I screamed at the top of my lungs. "Goodnight!"
'Man in the Mirror' faded out softly.
The crowd went crazy, and I soaked it all in. I bowed my head in gratitude, blowing kisses their way.
Still breathless, I walked off stage to where my family waited. I was given a towel as my seven kids ran to attack me in a group hug.
Angela watched us with a big grin on her face. The summer dress she wore sat beautifully on her body, emphasizing everything I loved about it.
She was a bit sweaty, probably due to London's summer heat. The entire show I couldn't keep my eyes off her, she looked absolutely mesmerizing tonight.
"Daddy, you were sooo amazing!" Paris hugged me tighter.
Eric joined her, "That was the best moonwalk I've ever seen you do, dad!"
"Thank you, guys. I love you." I kissed their heads.
Angela came over to me, giving me the most mind-blowing kiss. I closed my eyes, and allowed myself to get lost in her.
She pressed her body against mine. "I'll be in your dressing room. I need to freshen up... It's a little too hot tonight."
Damn...
As she was leaving, I didn't even try to hide the way I was staring at her cute butt.
After being congratulated again by everyone around me, I asked Adam to take the kids home.
I rushed to my dressing room, determined to get to my wife.
Just as I was about to open the door, Raymone Bain called my name.
"Michael, I have some people who want to see you."
"Not now, I need a few minutes to change." I told her.
"10 minutes?"
"Make it 45."
When I was inside the dressing room, the shower was running in the bathroom, and I smirked as I entered it.
"Angie, baby?" I started taking off my clothes.
"Come in, Mike." she said.
Angela was washing her hair when I opened the glass door. She finished, flashing me a smile again.
Maybe I imagined it, but it looked like her tummy was a bit more swollen than before.
Her arms wrapped around my neck before she kissed me. "Mmm, you were so good tonight, Michael... I told it'd be perfect..."
Hoisting her up, I gently pinned her against the shower wall.
A moan escaped her lips when I started kissing her jaw.
"It's been too long... I need you..."
"You sure? I don't want to hurt you again, Ange."
"Let's just try, okay?" she looked into my eyes. "Take it slow. I'll tell you if it hurts."
I nodded, and she kissed me more. She gasped into my mouth while my fingers made their way down.
For the next hour, I made sure nothing I did hurt her.
And when I finally gave her what she really wanted, my wife held onto me, saying how much she loves me.