My nap is interrupted when Ginny sits down beside me. I look up. "Hey, what's up?" "Have you seen Marcus anywhere?" I look around. "Funnily enough I haven't." She nods before looking at me. "So, how was your Christmas?" "I'm not a big fan of Christmas, so we don't actually do much. We just treat it like it's another day." "Why is that?" "My mum died 3 months before Christmas, and my dad died a month before. It's a sour holiday." Her eyes widen. "Oh, my God. I'm so sorry." I shrug. "Wasn't your fault."
I change the subject. "You have to present a book today, right? For AP English?" "Yeah." I look at her. "I think it's bullshit. You have to do all this work that we don't have to do just to feel represented in the class." "Yeah, well, I've decided to do it so..." "Well, if you change your mind. I'll back you 100%." She smiles. "Thank you." We seperate for classes and at lunch, I somehow end up hanging with Ginny, Bracia, Stacy, Jackie, and Alexandra. They're talking about Bracia and Bryon and some hat. I have no idea what's going on and I keep texting Marcus trying to figure out where he is.
I tune back in when they start talking about Ginny's book. "What were you thinking?" "Ann Petry, The Street, Audre Lorde's Sister Outsider, or, um, Nikole Hannah-Jones, The 1619 Project." Bracia nods. "Great books." Stacy speaks up. "Irrelavant. You need to let this teacher know this is shit." Bracia shakes her head. "Gitten won't listen." Jackie agrees. "Yeah, he's trash." Alexandra looks at Ginny. "Just don't do it." Ginny shakes her head. "I'm doing it. I've already decided. It's just what book?" "Sister Outsider." She looks at Stacy thinking about it. Max runs up placing herself beside Stacy.
"Hey, kids." She looks surprised to see me sitting there but she doesn't question it. "Bracia, I just saw Bryon wearing the hat." Jackie points at her. "Team Hat?" "Fully Team Hat." Stacy sighs. "Bummer. My mom just texted me. I got my SAT time. It's March 11." "Oh my God, what is Mercury doing then? Is it retrograding?" Bracia sighs. "I don't know, but I need the moons to rise, I need Pluto to enter the chat, I need full-on cosmic help." Jackie shakes her head. "You're gonna get, like, a 1600." Stacy sighs. "College pressure is real. My mom keeps telling me I need to take more APs, and I physically cannot."
Alexandra looks at me, Ginny, and Max. "You guys are so lucky you're not juniors. Hell year is no joke." Max groans. "Ugh. This feels like hell year. Speaking of APs, come on, we got English." Ginny sighs as I put my head on the table groaning. "No." Max looks at her. "Oh, I hope the book you chose has a good audiobook option." She walks away and I watch after Max with wide eyes. Bracia and her friends also look at Ginny in disbelief, but Ginny just looks sad as she shrugs.She grabs her bag and I link my arm through hers. "As I said, I'll support you whatever you do." She gives me a small smile as we walk to class.
Ginny is now standing at the front. "Sister Outsider. Um, this is an incredible collection of essays and speeches by Audre Lodre, where she digs into the different elements of her identity as a Black queer woman, and discusses that change in an oppressive society has to start within oneself." She turns to Mr Gitten and he nods. "Thank you, Ginny." Everyone applauds and she comes to sit down. "Everyone will read three chapters of Sister Outsider. Let's say Friday? And Ginny will be leading the class discussion." I look at him with wide eyes. Is she now teaching the class too? Ginny is just as surprised.
"I'm what?" "Thank you, Ginny." She looks at Max for support but Max just scoffs and shakes her head. I look back at her. "Whatever you want." She just sighs and looks down. The next day I'm lying on a beanbag, once again, taking another nap next to Silver when Ginny interrupts in once again. "Hey." Silver smiles at her. "Hey." I give her a wave. "Where's Marcus?" I shrug. I'm actually getting really concerned. I've been texting him endlessly and if he's not back today, I'm breaking into his house. Silver also shrugs.
"I don't know. He wasn't in chem today." Bracia walks up. "Hi. I'm sleepy. Need a coffee." I nod. "Amen to that." Silver looks at her. "You're so good. Your voice blows me away every rehearsal." Bracia smiles. "Aw. Thank you." Ginny looks at her. "I can't wait to see the show." I nod. "Me too." Max skips up to us. "Heyo." She plops down on the ground leaning on my legs. "Oh my God, Silver, your necklace." She basically lays on top of me to touch it. "Oh my God, it's incredible. I'm obsessed." "Thanks, it's vintage." She gasps. "Love that." "Um, I really have to get to rehearsal, so see you guys later." She moves and I groan losing my pillow.
She looks at Max. "Bye, Max." "Bye, Silver." We all look at her and she looks confused. "What?" We all mimic her. "Bye, Silver." Bracia chuckles. "It's vintage." Ginny looks at her. "What in the vagina is going on?" "Nothing." Bracia scoffs. "No. You guys are dirty flirty in rehearsals. I see you giggling in a corner." "Mm. The sexual energy is real." "Okay, that doesn't mean anything, 'cause I just exude sexual energy. I'm like a cheetah." Bracia holds her boobs together once again mimicing Max. "Silver, can you untie me?" Max giggles.
"Do you really think we're flirty?" "Yes, dude, she likes you." I nod. "I second that." She looks at me. "You're her friend. Does she talk about me?" I shake my head. "I'm not breaking the bro code. Sorry." She does. More than she realizes. Bracia stands up. "I'll see you in rehearsal." Max looks at Ginny. "You really think she likes me?" Before she can say anything Marcus plops down right on top of me. I groan. "Get off me, fat-ass." I sniff the air and my eyes widen. I can smell alcohol on him. Ginny's eyes widen as she looks at him. "Are you drunk?"
Max looks into his eyes. "Oh my God, he's wasted." Suddenly he pulls out a flask and there is panic as Max grabs it passing it to Ginny and I hold his hands down to stop him from trying to take it back. Max looks at him. "Are you insane?" "Marcus, you can't be drunk at school. What if you get caught? You'll get in a lot of trouble." He just looks at Ginny with no emotion on his face. "Ginny." We all turn to see Georgia. We all move into action. She can't see Marcus like this cause she'll tell Ellen. Max helps him up and finally I can breathe properly.
Max looks at him upset. "Where do you think we are, Euphoria? Let's go." We take Marcus home and sneak him up to his room. He grabs a guitar and immediately Max is on it. I help him take off his shoes as he complains that Max is a party pooper. He's such a baby when he's drunk. "Those are my shoes." I nod. "Yeah, babe they are. But your feet are feeling sore, so I'm taking them off." He nods. "Well, thank you." He looks around. "Where did my flask go?" Max grabs his shoulders. "Dude, why would you come to school drunk? Like, what a truly weird thing to do." "I'm not drunk." I scoff. "Yeah, and I'm dating Abby." Max's eyes widen and so do mine.
Did not mean to say that out loud. Max is about to say something when Ellen saves my life downstairs. "Two questions. Do you guys want to go out for Chinese tonight? Second question, are you staying for dinner, Cassie?" "No, I've gotta go to the Cafe but thanks Ellen." Marcus' eyes widen. "Scallion pancakes." I put my hand over his mouth. "You know what, we're actually--" "Scallion pancakes." I press my hand down harder. "We're studying a lot, so if we could do delivery, that'd be cool." "Roger that. School first." "Scallion pancakes."
Max sighs. "Can we get scallion pancakes?" "You got it." She lies him down and he looks at her. "Why aren't you at rehearsal with Silver? She likes you." He bops her nose. "Why does everyone keep saying that?" She puts a bin beside him. "Hey, do you think Ginny likes me?" "Well, you two are grossly obsessed with each other. Frankly, I don't see the appeal. Between you and Pete Davidson, straight women confuse me." She bends down to his level. "Of course she likes you, you big old dummy." "I don't think she should." I look at him concerned.
Max sighs before putting her hand on his shoulder. "'Kay, I'm gonna get you some water. Do not leave this room. Stay here, stay in this bed. I mean it." I kiss the top of his head. "I've gotta go, but hopefully I'll see a sober version of you tomorrow. Love you." "I love you more." I smile. Drunk Marcus is sweet too. I wave goodbye to Ellen and Max as I leave the house and go to the cafe. I leave the backroom when I see Ginny sitting at a table. I go up to her and see the day old muffin basket. I smile. "Ooh, muffin." I grab one and she chuckles. A guy walks past and she smiles. "Gil. Hey." He turns to her.
"Hey." "Hey, what are you doing here?" "Just grabbing some dinner. My Airbnb's just got a hot plate, so..." "Oh. You should try the turkey club sandwich, it's really good. Ask for the Ginny version. It'll piss Joe off, but it's the best." He nods. "Thank you." He walks away and Ginny looks at me. "That's Austin's dad." I nod. "Wow. Austin must be stoked having his dad in town." She nods. He goes to talk to Joe and when he mentions the Ginny version, Joe looks up upset. Ginny waves at him with a smile on his face. "I'm gonna go to the bathroom. I'll see you later." She nods. "Is Marcus okay?" I sigh. "I really don't know. Hopefully he will be."
I go to the bathroom and while I'm trying to open the door, it almost whacks me in the face. "Oh my God, I'm so sorry." I look at Abby. "It's fine. Don't worry about it." She smiles. "Oh, hey Cass. Long time no see. I've kinda missed you." "Wow, way to stab a girl in the heart. Kinda?" She chuckles. "Fine, I actually really missed you." I smile cheekily. " That's needy. We talked like three hours ago." She rolls her eyes. "Yeah, but not face-to-face." So, Abby and I have been texting for quite a bit. It's nothing, really. She just vents to me about her problems and I try my best to help her. I smile.
"Well I'm going to the bathroom but I'll see you around." She smiles. "See you around, Cassie." She walks away and I sigh. God, she's so pretty. "You're so in love." I jump and turn to Joe. "What?" "I see the way you're looking at her. Don't think I didn't." I roll my eyes. "Whatever, JoJo." I go in the bathroom before he can make fun of me anymore. The next day, it's time for Ginny to lead the class discussion. She's standing at the front of the class and she looks so nervous. She's absolutely silent and Mr Gitten is looking at her annoyed.
"Ginny? Anytime." I glare at him. The audacity. "No." "I'm sorry?" "No, this sucks. And I have the lesson plan, like, I did the damn thing. Some of you may think I'm causing drama or making trouble, but no one else was asked to do this. So what, I'm either erased from the curriculum, or I have to do more work than everyone else? No." "Ginny, I am trying to find a way for you--" "You know what? I'm... I'm dropping this damn class." Max scoffs as Ginny storms out of class. She grabs her and Ginny's stuff before exiting. I stand up too.
"And where do you think you're going, Cassandra?" "I'm leaving. You know, you are such an asshole." "Excuse me? You know your dad would be disappointed with the person you've become." I feel a stab in my heart. No matter how much he hurt me, he's still my dad. "Why is your go-to dig always something about my dad? Frankly, Mr Gitten, you're obsession with him is concerning. I think you should seek therapy for that." "You know what? You and your whore mother ruined his life. I'm glad your mother died. She deserved to. She never deserved him. I'm glad you made her leave the house so she could get killed."
I look at him with wide eyes as tears reach them. Everyone looks at me in concern. I run out of the class. I almost bump into Max. She looks at me. "Cass? Hey, what's wrong?" I push past her and go to the bathroom and lock myself in a stall. I can feel my breath speeding up and my visions getting blurry. "Hey, is everything okay?" I can recognise that voice from anywhere. "Abby?" "Cass? Open the door." I reach my hand up and unlock the stall. She opens the door before quickly closing it behind her.
She sits beside me before putting her arms around me. "I'm not really sure what to do in this situation. I've never helped someone who was having a panic attack." "J-j-just keep t-talking." She nods before moving to stroke my hair. "Okay, well I'm ditching English, right now. I find it so funny that dumb English and AP English happen at the same time." I let out a small chuckle at that. "Um, I'm meeting my dad's girlfriend, this weekend. Not excited at all." I can feel myself start to calm down as she rambles on. I lay my head on her shoulder and she looks at me. "Do you feel any better?"
"With you here? Of course." She smiles softly moving the hair out of my face. Suddenly she kisses me. I gasp before kissing her back. She pulls away and she looks a little panicked. "Abby?" She chuckles. "I just kissed you. And I liked it. And I like you." My eyes widen. "What?" "I like you, Cassie." She pulls me in for another kiss but this time I'm prepared for it. I've never been as happy as I am right now.