The last week of school flew by before Evan could recover. He didn't know if it was the coming holiday atmosphere or if he should just call it a Christmas miracle, but Kieran, Josh, and Aiden had left him alone all week, and he could finally spend some stress-free time at school.
He spent the afternoon after school shopping for last-minute gifts, and although he didn't plan on spending a lot of money, he decided to buy a little something for Michael and Ryan as well. He had planned to give Ryan his present on Friday night when he got on the bus, and this time, it was Evan who was going to see him off.
After buying him a present on Tuesday, he spent every spare minute panicking about whether he did the right thing and whether it would be embarrassing, but it was too late since he had bought it and to calm his nerves, he wrapped it in decorative paper, and it would be a pity to tear it up.
Maybe it wasn't the best idea to buy him a mug with a dinosaur and the inscription "You make my heart SAUR." Too late to return it now.
Plus, Ryan texted him one random night that he had something for him too, and after Evan made sure he didn't spend too much money on him, he agreed to exchange gifts and open them individually on Saturday. Evan wouldn't have been able to see Ryan's expression after seeing the gift from him, so for the first time he was glad to be several miles away from him.
He was beginning to worry that by the time he got to the bus stop, the paper the mug was wrapped in would be more wrinkled than his homely clothes, which he thought were unnecessary to iron.
His hands were sweating, and his breathing was rapid, as evidenced by the puffs of cold air escaping from his nose and mouth. He had no idea why he was making a big deal out of it, but somehow, he felt it was the next step in their non-existent relationship. It was a pretty stupid idea since he was dating someone else a month ago, but Evan couldn't help but slowly but surely start to change his mindset about Ryan.
Kieran still had a place in his heart, and sometimes he woke up at night thinking he should have done things differently, but he no longer ached every look at him when he failed to avoid him. Seeing him but not being able to talk to him was quite difficult, but Evan had to admit that it was helping him gradually overcome his feelings for him. However, even though his love for him was no longer that strong, Evan still missed him in his life and his other two friends, too.
But he wasn't going to make the first move, because his first move actually ruined everything and now it was someone else's turn to fix it. Evan, being the optimist he always was, hoped that his situation with his friends would improve on its own when the new year rolled around.
Until then, he was in his safe place, which ironically was North Hallson, from where he had been trying to escape all his life. He knew in his heart that Ryan was to blame, but he wasn't going to admit it out loud just yet and let the mug do the work.
Speaking of the mug, he really hoped that Ryan wouldn't accidentally break it on the way, but he didn't want to tell him what he bought him, so he had to hope that he would automatically be careful with it. Knowing Ryan, he definitely would be.
He was always so gentle, even when he was picking on him and even when he was a wolf. With that thought, a memory flashed through Evan's mind, and he blushed. Seeing Ryan in his wolf form felt surreal. And smelling his scent, which was even stronger like this, made him think unspeakable things. He still couldn't get out of his mind how he felt when Ryan's wolf nibbled on his ear, or when he rubbed his neck against his. It was such an intimate moment, especially when they left each other's scent on each other, which in the wolf world meant only one thing. No one could deny that they cared about each other and that they were close. Angie and Michael automatically sensed that something special was happening and gave them space without commenting on their rapprochement. Evan still didn't know if Ryan had said anything to his cousin, but he doubted it, knowing Michael, he would have told him if he knew Evan was Ryan's mate. At the very least, he would scold him for his statement that mates are stupid and unnecessary. Something that Evan didn't think for a long time now and that's only thanks to Ryan.
Thinking like this, Evan knew that he would not escape his fate anymore and was surprisingly content with this idea. He still had chaos in his heart and didn't want to jump into a new relationship just yet, but he knew he wanted Ryan by his side. But not before he was able to give him his all. Plus, as he told Angie, it had been a long time since he'd been single, and it was exactly what he needed right now. He didn't want to do anything stupid to hurt Ryan again, so he had to pull himself together first.
It was quite funny that he was becoming so sure about his feelings for him when he was with Kieran not so long ago. He had always said that it was silly to say that wolves were impulsive and jumped into a relationship with their mates immediately upon meeting, as he thought that they did so out of a childish idea of endless love that was instilled in their heads from a young age, but he was clearly wrong. This type of love appeared whether he believed in it or not.
With his head full of thoughts and his cheeks blushing, he reached the familiar bus stop. Ryan wasn't there yet, so he quickly pulled his phone out of his pocket to check the time. Even though he was not aware of his surroundings for half of the way, he managed to arrive at the meeting place a little earlier. So, he had no choice but to wait, and it was quite a paradox since most of the time Ryan was here waiting for him.
Since Evan had no problem getting lost in thought, his wait didn't last long.
He smelled him before he saw him and, that surprised him. Apparently, by spending time together in wolf form, their scent was much more familiar to them now, so he had no problem recognizing it right away. He had no idea if it was just a short-term effect or if it would stay like this forever, but surprisingly he didn't panic about it. After all, he was still convinced that Ryan knew the truth about their relationship a long time ago.
His lips involuntarily spread into a wide smile at the sight of him. As before, he was not wearing a hat, so his thick black hair was covered with snowflakes. He was carrying a travel bag, and Evan assumed that he had gifts for his family in it, otherwise, it would look like he was going to leave for a longer period of time than he told Evan, and he didn't like that.
He automatically decided to walk towards him, retracing his steps without taking his eyes off him, and Ryan added to his pace to meet him in the middle as soon as possible.
"Hey," Evan greeted him first. Ryan was grinning from ear to ear as usual, and Evan's mood automatically matched. He couldn't seem to be sad for long in Ryan's presence and started calling it his superpower as Evan loved to be grumpy.
"Hi," even his voice reflected his cheerfulness. They stood facing each other in such close proximity that the toes of their shoes were almost touching, and Evan only had to reach out to touch him. But he wouldn't do it, knowing that it would be a mixed signal again, which he promised he wouldn't give anymore.
"I'm gonna miss you." He, therefore, decided to express his feelings verbally. It was an honest confession that Evan wouldn't allow himself to say in front of anyone but him and Angie, as they were the closest people to him.
"I'll miss you too. I wish you could come with me." His eyes were honest, and Evan felt himself start to blush again. He couldn't imagine himself in front of Ryan's family, not counting Michael, especially if it meant introducing him as his soul mate.
"I'm sure I'd embarrass myself," he decided to turn the conversation in another direction. Ryan chuckled, and Evan managed to look offended as if he took the sound as confirmation of his words.
"I'm sure my family would love you. But come to think of it, I'm glad you won't see my childhood photos. Especially the ones in the dinosaur costume," Ryan said, reminding Evan that he still had the gift for him in his hands.
"By any chance, I would very much like to see photos of you in a dinosaur costume. I admit, dinosaurs have grown quite close to my heart," was his answer, and Ryan was beaming again.
"Dinosaurs or one in particular?" Evan had no problem catching the meaning behind the question.
"Well, this Pachycephalosaurus is kinda cool," he replied. It was both a compliment to Ryan and a recognition of his favourite dinosaur, so it should be a win either way.
"He's the best," he hummed in agreement. They were back in their little cheesy world and even though Evan wasn't a fan of cheesy, he was slowly getting used to it. Not that he had a choice as his heart raced every time, he heard Ryan's voice.
"We're seriously cheesy, aren't we?" Ryan chuckled, speaking Evan's thoughts out loud as if he heard them in his own head. In a way, it was a foreshadowing of what they were slowly but surely heading towards.
"Yeah, I guess all..." Evan trailed off slowly, realizing what he almost said. His eyes widened, and he had no idea what to do. He couldn't quickly figure out what to say to steer the conversation away from a word neither of them had yet said in connection with them. At least not out loud.
Ryan was also quiet, as if he too was waging a silent battle within himself and didn't know what to say out loud. The atmosphere between them changed quickly, but it was still not unpleasant. It never was.
"We can call it something else if you want," Ryan suggested in a low tone as if he wasn't sure what he was saying.
"No!" Evan let his inner wolf get the better of him and let out a scream he almost didn't realize. He was shocked at himself and not just because he had just embarrassed himself in front of Ryan, but because of how eager he was to call Ryan what he was.
"I-" he began, but again he had no idea how to finish the sentence. Fortunately, this time the black-haired boy in front of him got it.
"Maybe we can talk about it when I get back? I don't think the bus stop is the best place for this, and certainly not when we only have a few minutes. Not that I have anything against this stop, as I always like to see you here, just not when I'm leaving you," he admitted. It was as sincere as ever, and Evan couldn't ignore it.
"Yeah, we can talk about it when you get back. I mean, my soul will be here waiting for you anyway," Evan decided to match his level of honesty, even though it was way out of his comfort zone. But apparently it was worth it as he was rewarded with Ryan's bright smile.
"I'm gonna fucking miss you," he chuckled shortly, and Evan joined him. With another reminder that Ryan was indeed leaving, Evan remembered the gift in his hands.
"Here. It's nothing extra and it's definitely going to look cheesy, but somehow I think you might like it," he felt the need to defend his choice as he still wasn't sure if it was a good idea. With his words, he handed Ryan a flimsily wrapped gift and he carefully took it from him.
"Thank you." The ink-haired boy held the wrapped box in his hands for a while, watching it as if trying to guess what was inside, but then gave up. A travel bag fell from his shoulder to the ground, and he bent down to place the gift he had received inside. He carefully placed the box between his clothes to give it proper protection and then pulled out a similarly wrapped gift from the bag, only slightly smaller and tied with a red ribbon. He then stood up and handed it to Evan.
Evan wasn't at all surprised that Ryan's attempt at working with the wrapping paper went much better than his. He ran his fingers over the neatly wrapped gift and could tell by the sharp edges that Ryan, like him, had put the gift in the box.
"Thanks," he thanked him and already wanted to open it to see what he bought him. It was the first thing he had received from his soulmate, and he was sure he would remember it for a very long time.
Although all his attention was focused on the handsome boy in front of him, he couldn't help but notice the bus slowly approaching them. Their little moment was ending, and Ryan's departure was here. He couldn't help but feel down, even though he was supposed to see him again in a few days.
Ryan immediately noticed the change in his face and glanced back to notice the bus behind him. His travel bag was still on the cold ground, but instead of reaching for it, his hand shot up to Evan's cheek. The brown-eyed boy blinked in surprise, but before he could say anything, Ryan rested his forehead against his.
"Like a Pachycephalosaurus," he whispered. Evan knew very well that this moment was not a friendly gesture, but he decided not to protest this time. Not that he could when he was enjoying his touch so much that he closed his eyes.
"I'm gonna fucking miss you," he repeated the words the other boy had said earlier.
The bus was only a few meters away from them, and Ryan pulled away from him. First his forehead and then he pulled his hand back to him as he left it on Evan's face for a few seconds longer. Then he got up to get his bag and threw the strap over his shoulder, and there was only one thing left for him – to say goodbye. But instead, he said, "See you."
"Happy Holidays, Bane," was Evan's reply.
"Happy Holidays, Lightwood." And so, they said goodbye for the week with big smiles on their faces.