The next time either of them woke up was around midnight, about 4 hours after they fell asleep.
Maya was the first one up, not totally sure why she was awake for a second until she realized she needed to go to the bathroom. She moved slowly, her stomach crampy and her whole body just feeling weak. She looked over, seeing her wife sound asleep on the couch.
She debated waking her up, but she was pretty sure she could make it to the bathroom on her own. However, as soon as she stood up, she felt a gush of blood along with a major headrush, forcing her to sit back down on the bed loudly, bracing herself as she tried to regain her bearings.
The commotion woke Carina up, the Italian waking up slowly before looking over and seeing her wife sitting up on the edge of the bed, sensing something wasn't right.
"Bambina?" she said, getting up, "Hey, are you ok?"
"Um, I don't know," Maya said as Carina sat down next to her, "I needed to pee, but when I tried to get up, I got really dizzy and it felt like I was bleeding a lot."
"Ok," Carina said, trying to remain calm, "How are you feeling now?"
"Better," Maya said, finally looking at her, "But I still need to pee."
"Ok," Carina said, "Do you want me to get a bedpan or a bedside commode, or do you want to try to make it to the bathroom?"
"I think I can make it to the bathroom," Maya said, rubbing her eyes, "But do you think it's safe? Am I like, bleeding out?"
"I want you to stand again and see what happens," Carina said, suspecting that blood had simply pooled in Maya's uterus and then come out in a big gush when she stood, something that commonly happened when someone was sitting or lying down for a long time, and Maya had been asleep for close to 4 hours at this point. Maya stood up again, holding onto her wife.
"Do you still feel like you are bleeding a lot?" Carina asked, turning on the small light next to Maya's bed.
"No," Maya said, shaking her head, "No, it feels normal again."
"Good," Carina nodded, "It was probably just because you were laying down for so long, but we will keep an eye on it. If you start to feel dizzy or like you are bleeding more, let me know ok?"
Maya nodded as Carina helped her to the bathroom.
"Are you still feeling feverish?" Carina asked after Maya finished using the bathroom, Carina noting her bleeding didn't seem abnormal as she helped her.
"Um, maybe," Maya said as Carina helped her into a new pair of mesh underwear, "I don't really know."
Carina put a hand on her wife's forehead, "You still feel pretty warm."
"I need to deal with this breast milk again," Maya said as she washed her hands, noticing her boobs were aching again, "I probably should have set an alarm to wake up every 3 hours."
"Let's get you back to bed and then we can do that," Carina said, helping Maya out of the bathroom, "And for tonight, I think it is more important that you get sleep. We can work on getting into a pumping routine tomorrow, ok? Your body is exhausted and needs rest."
"Can we go see Lia after we get her more milk?" Maya asked with a yawn as she sat back down on the bed.
"I think you need to sleep some more," Carina said, "You still have a fever and you look so tired."
"But I miss her," Maya said, tears in her eyes.
"I know," Carina sighed as she pulled out another small bottle to collect colostrum for Lia, "But you also have to take care of yourself. Remember our rule? Our wellbeing has to be a priority when it can be and right now, Lia is safe in the NICU and you need to let your body rest some more."
"Lia should still be in my body where she belongs," Maya said, looking down at her hands.
"Hey," Carina said, sitting down next to her, wrapping her arm around her shoulder, "We talked about this. There was absolutely nothing you could have done to prevent this. You did everything exactly right. Sometimes, these things just happen and babies come early. But she is getting the very best care, and she is doing so well. You are not to blame though Bambina, ok?"
Maya nodded a little as Carina grabbed a tissue and gently wiped the tears off her cheeks before pressing a kiss to her lips.
"Now, let's get our little Trottolina some milk and then get some more sleep, ok?" Carina said.
"I still want to go see her," Maya said as she unbuttoned her shirt.
"How about we sleep again and then we can go see her after?" Carina suggested as Maya got settled into the best position to hand express, "We still have to see if you are allowed in the NICU with a fever and I am betting that until your labs come back, the answer is going to be not just for the safety of Lia and all the other babies."
"I want to be with her," Maya said, "I can't not be with her."
"We will get it figured out," Carina promised, "For now, let's focus on this, ok?"
Maya nodded as Carina helped her get the precious colostrum for Lia, the Italian carefully storing it away as Maya got resettled in bed. Just then, the nurse came in.
"Oh, you're awake," the nurse said, "How are you feeling?"
"Ok," Maya said.
"I just want to grab some quick vitals," the nurse said, "Have you been up and moving around since you woke up?"
"Yeah," Maya said, "I went to the bathroom and got some more milk for Lia."
"And moving around is going ok?" the nurse asked as she typed on the computer in Maya's room, "No dizziness or anything?"
"I was a little dizzy when I first got up," Maya said, "And it felt like I was bleeding a lot, but then when I went slower, it felt better and it didn't feel like I was bleeding anymore."
"I didn't do an exam, but I checked when she went to the bathroom," Carina said, "It didn't look like more bleeding than normal."
"I want to do a quick exam just in case," the nurse said, "I believe you Dr. Bishop-Deluca, but I just want to be safe."
"Of course," Carina nodded.
"I am first just going to push on your stomach a little bit," the nurse said, gently lifting Maya's shirt, palpating around, "Ok, well, everything there feels good. Any pain when I do that?"
"No," Maya said, "I mean, I have some mild cramps, but they doesn't get worse when you do that. If anything, they feel better."
"If they are bothering you, you can try sleeping on your stomach," the nurse said.
"Carina told me to try that and it helped a lot," Maya nodded.
"Good," the nurse said, "You are also due for another round of Tylenol if you want it."
"Yes please," Maya said, too tired both physically and emotionally to deal with the achiness.
"I will get it once I finish your exam," the nurse said, "Now, Maya, can I help you get your pants off?"
Maya nodded as the nurse expertly helped her get her pants and mesh undies off.
"Ok," the nurse said, grabbing a pair of sterile gloves, "I am not seeing any abnormal bleeding or swelling. Are you having any pain that is worse than before?"
"No," Maya said, shaking her head as she lay on the bed, "I mean, nothing feels good, but it's just sore and achy like before."
"Good," the nurse said, finishing up her check, "Well, everything looks just as we would expect. I am just going to get a quick set of vitals."
Apart from her temperature which was still hovering at 101.0, Maya looked great.
"Did Dr. Johnson ask the NICU if I can see Lia with a fever?" Maya asked.
"So we went over the NICU policy and it basically is that if you have no other symptoms and your labs are all normal, you can go see her," the nurse said, "We don't have all your labs back yet, but the ones we did get back looked clear. But you are probably going to have to wait until morning to go see her. For now, just rest and hydrate. It is the best thing you can do. I am going to go grab you that Tylenol. Did you need anything else?"
"No," Maya mumbled, biting her lip as she looked down.
"I'm sure this must be very hard," the nurse said, "We are doing everything we can to get you back with Lia as soon as is safe for both of you, ok?"
Maya nodded sniffling a little. The nurse was about to say something, but she caught Carina's eye, the OB telling her silently that she had it covered.
"I'll be right back with your meds and some more to drink," the nurse said, slipping out of the room.
"I just want to be with her," Maya said, breaking down as Carina sat down on the bed next to her, pulling her into her arms.
"I know," the Italian said, rubbing her hand up and down her wife's back as she held her, "I know. But it should just be a few more hours. You can get some more rest which is exactly what your body needs right now and then in the morning, we can go down and see her, ok?"
Maya just stayed in Carina's arms, tears tapering off some as Carina just pressed gentle kisses to the top of her head.
"Here is that Tylenol," the nurse said, coming back into the room with the pills and a drink, quickly scanning Maya's wristband before handing her the pills in a cup, "Is there anything else you need?"
"No, thank you," Maya said, swallowing the pills quickly.
"If you do, don't hesitate to call," the nurse said, "I'll be back in a few hours to check on you again."
"Ok Bambina," Carina said, "Are you ready to go back to sleep?"
"Will you stay?" Maya asked so quietly Carina almost didn't hear her.
"Of course," Carina said, settling a little bit more in bed, "I am right here if you need me."
Maya moved out of Carina's arms, grabbing her phone before opening it and immediately going to her photos.
"Look at Rowan's smile in this one," Maya said, staring at one of the photos of the five of them.
"She is so in love with her sorellina," Carina said, smiling, "Once we let her hold her, she is never going to want to put her down."
"When can the twins hold her?" Maya asked.
"I mean, theoretically now," Carina said, "But we should probably wait until she is regulating her temperature better and maybe is off her CPAP just so it's easier for them. But we can see."
"How long is she going to be on CPAP?" Maya asked, scrolling to another picture of just Lia's little face, the mask swamping most of it though in this picture, her eyes were open.
"It all depends on how she does," Carina said, "It could be a few days or a few weeks. It's up to her and her body."
"I hope it's soon," Maya said, "I want to be able to see her whole face."
"I know," Carina said, "Did you notice how bald she is?"
"Yes," Maya nodded, chuckling, "I wonder if she will have blonde hair like Ro or brown hair like Nora."
"Maybe it will be red," Carina said.
"Red?" Maya laughed, "How would it be red?"
"I don't know," Carina shrugged, "Don't you have an aunt with red hair?"
"My mom's sister, yeah," Maya nodded.
"So it could happen," Carina said.
"I guess we will have to wait and see," Maya said, yawning.
"Sleep Bambina," Carina said, "I will be right here."
"You need sleep too," Maya said, feeling her eyelids getting heavy.
"I will try to sleep," Carina said, taking Maya's phone from her as the blonde relaxed more, "I love you Bambina."
"I love you too," Maya said as she drifted off.
Carina took her wife's phone, scrolling through the photos as she rubbed Maya's back. She stared at the pictures of their youngest for a long time, trying to fully wrap her head around what had happened today. Somehow, two and a half months before they should have, they became a family of five. Seeing her daughter in the isolette broke Carina's heart as she looked at the photos. This was so not how she had imagined things going.
She had thought that in October, they would spend a few hours with Maya laboring at home after whisking the twins off to Andrea's or Vic and Travis's or Amelia's. She would help Maya though early labor and they would enjoy that special time together before eventually coming to the hospital where Maya would labor more and then she would have the water birth she had at one point talked about.
Once the baby was born, the three of them would spend some quiet time together doing skin to skin and just getting to know their newest addition before the twins came to meet their new sibling, getting to hold them and experience all the things new babies do. Rowan would most likely have been fascinated with breast feeding and Nora would have been a bit shy with the baby at first before warming up. And then, they would take the baby home and start their life as a family of five.
This was so much harder than anything Carina had imagined. It hurt to see her wife so torn up and that her daughter was downstairs away from them where she would remain for likely two months or more. Carina didn't even realize until she felt wetness hit her hand that tears were running down her cheeks as she thought about everything. She desperately tried not to move too much, not wanting to wake her exhausted wife.
She somehow managed to calm herself down, looking down to see Maya was luckily still sound asleep almost on top of her. She was glad she was, knowing that the next few days were probably going to be incredibly hard and Maya needed all the sleep she could get. Also, sleep would hopefully help her get her fever down. While Carina was acutely aware that fevers in new moms was not uncommon, it still worried her. With Maya's waters having broken early, her risk for infection was much higher. Hearing that the labs that had come back were looking good helped her feel a bit better about everything, but with how this pregnancy had gone, she was fully prepared to hear her wife had a devastating infection.
She settled herself back against the pillows, allowing her eyes to close as she tried to focus on the feeling of her wife in her arms and not the absence of their newborn in their room. She didn't quite fall asleep, too restless and worried for that, but she did rest which was about as good as she was gonna get tonight.
Maya woke up a few hours after she fell asleep, Carina helping her to bathroom and helping her get more milk for Lia.
"Is it time to go to the NICU yet?" Maya asked as she buttoned her shirt back up.
"Bambina, it is 4 am," Carina said, "I think you need to try to sleep a little more. Plus, I don't think your labs are back yet."
"I don't want to sleep," Maya said, leaning her head on Carina's shoulder, "I want to be with our baby."
"I know," Carina said, "Hopefully soon. Are you still feverish?"
"Non lo so," Maya said as Carina wrapped her arm around her wife, "Maybe."
Carina snaked a hand around, placing it on her wife's forehead.
"You might be," Carina said, "You feel warm, but I can't tell if it is a fever or not. How is everything else feeling?"
"My stomach aches," Maya said, "Not like painful, but just like crampy and...achy. And my vagina is sore which I don't understand because she is tiny and yet I am still sore."
"She might be tiny, but she is much bigger than anything that normally goes through your vagina," Carina said, "Being sore is normal. It should go away in a few days. I will have them bring you a sitz bath today to help you feel better."
"Are you going to spend the night here again tonight?" Maya asked.
"I don't know," Carina sighed, "I want to, but I want to see how the bambine did last night. This is all so much harder with having the twins at home."
"I know," Maya said, "I want you to stay, but I also don't want the twins to be upset. I really hope we didn't undo all their progress by doing this. Maybe you should have just gone home with them."
"No, I needed to be here with you," Carina said, "I don't think I could have been anywhere else tonight. I do not ever want the twins to feel like they have been replaced or that they are loved less because Trottolina is here now, but we are also going to have to give her some attention, especially because she is in the NICU. But we will all adjust. And they seemed happy when I talked to them before bedtime. Amelia said they were doing well. And we might have to deal with some regression, but we will take it one day at a time. They might surprise us. They have grown a lot in the past few months."
"That is true," Maya sighed, "As Rowan loves to tell us, they are three and a half."
"I know," Carina said, laughing, "I can't believe they are already that old. Sometimes, it feels like we were just here holding two new babies and they are so big already. And before we know it, it will be Lia too."
"Right now, it feels impossible she will ever be that big," Maya sighed, "She is so tiny."
"I know," Carina said, "But she won't stay that way forever."
"As sad as I am to think about our not even one day old baby growing up, I also can't wait for her to be bigger so she can come home."
"Lo so," Carina said, "Me too." Just then, the door opened and Maya's nurse came in.
"So we just got your labs back," the nurse said, "All your numbers are within normal range and there is nothing concerning there. How are you feeling?"
"Fine," Maya said, "About the same as last night but maybe a bit less exhausted. So because my labs are good, does that mean I get to go see Lia?"
"I want to grab some vitals on you and do a quick exam," the nurse said, "Just to make sure everything looks good and then yes, you can go down to the NICU."
The nurse quickly did everything she needed to for Maya, noting her temp was down to 100.2 which was a step in the right direction though the new mom had Tylenol in her system which was probably helping too.
"Ok," the nurse said as she finished her exam of Maya's abdomen which still felt as it should, "You are welcome to go down to the NICU. I can grab a wheelchair, or, if you are feeling up to it, it actually would be good for you to walk down there. Moving around helps with healing."
"I am good to walk," Maya said, nodding.
"Alright," the nurse said, nodding, "If you could be back up here around 9:30 for rounds, I will tell Dr. Johnson to do you last. Other than that, feel free to have the nurses down there page us if anything comes up, but considering you are with the head of the OB department, I am not worried."
"I will take good care of her," Carina nodded with a smile as she helped Maya up.
"Let's bring the milk for Lia," Maya said, reaching for the bag.
"And your water bottle," Carina said, "You have to stay hydrated. We don't know exactly why these postpartum fevers happen, but they think it could be at least partly linked to dehydration so keeping up your fluids is important. Now, give me the bag for Lia and you carry your drink."
"I can carry the bag," Maya said, "I had a baby I'm not incapable."
"I know that," Carina sighed, "Fine. You can carry it."
Carina slipped her hand into her wife's, mindful of the IV that was in the back of her hand which was not being used but would have to stay put until discharge.
"Do you think she was ok while we were sleeping?" Maya asked as they slowly made their way to the elevators, Maya finding herself a lot more sore than she realized earlier, though walking around did feel very good.
"I'm sure she did a lot of sleeping too," Carina said as they got in the elevator, "Babies sleep a lot."
"It never felt like she slept while she was inside," Maya said, "I swear she moved all the time."
"I know it felt like that, but babies sleep a lot inside too," Carina said, "Just not usually when you want to sleep."
"I wish she was still in there keeping me awake," Maya said, biting her lip, trying not to start crying.
"Soon enough, she will be home keeping us up all night," Carina said, pulling her wife close for a moment.
"How long do you think she is going to be here?" Maya asked, wiping the tears from the corner of her eyes.
"That is something you will have to ask her doctor," Carina said, "But we usually tell patients to expect their baby to come home around their due date. It could be sooner if things go well or it could be longer if there are complications. But I would expect Lia to be here until at least October."
"That is like two months," Maya sighed, "It's so long."
"Lo so," Carina said, "But we can be here for her every day and spend time with her while she is here, ok?"
Maya nodded as the elevator doors opened and they got off, heading to the NICU. The hospital was quiet because of the early hour which was nice because they were both feeling pretty overwhelmed and the lack of noise made it a little easier. They quickly washed their hands and got everything ready to go into the NICU, stopping to get their temperatures taken.
"You have a fever over 100," the woman on duty said, looking at Maya.
"I know, but I was told I would still be allowed in," Maya said, "I am not sick."
"Our policy is very clear," the woman said, "Any temperature over 100 will not be allowed in. I'm sorry. You will have to come back when you are feeling better."
"No," Maya said, tears filling her eyes, "No, I was told I could see my baby. I want to see my baby. Carina."
"Shhhh, Bambina," Carina sighed, pulling her wife close before looking at the woman behind the desk, "I want to speak to the charge nurse please."
"We don't really do that," the woman said, "You are not allowed in if you are sick. That is the rule."
"Listen to me," Carina said, rubbing her wife's back as the blonde cried, "I am a doctor here and also a parent of a child in the NICU and I am asking to speak to the charge nurse so please go get them for me."
The woman rolled her eyes but got up and left the desk.
"I just want to see Lia," Maya cried as Carina held her. "Lo so," Carina said, "And you will. I have a good relationship with the nurses down here and they will be able to help. It's ok." Just then, the woman from the desk came back along with a nurse, who immediately walked over to Maya and Carina. "Dr. Bishop Deluca," she said, "Hey. I saw your little girl was admitted this afternoon. Are you here to see her?"
"Si," Carina nodded, "But Maya has what has been ruled as a benign postpartum fever which we were told would not be an issue for her getting in to see our daughter."
"It's not," the nurse said, "I actually saw that come through from the postpartum floor not long ago. Susan, why didn't you let them in?"
"The rules are no entry with a fever," the woman behind the desk said.
"Yes, but did you not read your latest updates that Mrs. Bishop-Deluca was given clearance to come in?" the nurse asked, "She is not ill and is allowed to come in."
"I must have missed it," the woman said, shrinking back in her chair a little bit, "Sorry."
"Don't apologize to me," the nurse said, "Apologize to the parents who you prevented from seeing their child."
"I'm sorry," the woman said, "You are free to go in."
Neither Maya nor Carina said anything as they walked into the NICU, Maya still pretty upset though the tears had luckily stopped.
"Come on," the nurse said, guiding them over to Lia's part of the NICU.
"How has she been?" Maya asked as they approached the isolette.
"I haven't heard that she had been acting up," the nurse said, "But Julia will know more. She has been her nurse tonight."
"She has been great," another nurse, presumably Julia, said coming over to them, "She has mostly just been sleeping which is exactly what we want with a little preemie, though I think she was just starting to wake up when I checked on her a few minutes ago. Would you like to hold her?"
"Yes please," Maya nodded, "Oh, and here is milk for her."
"Perfect," Julia said, setting the bag down as Maya sat in the chair, unbuttoning her shirt as Julia got Lia out of the isolette.
"We gave her a little bit of medicine to help her lungs start working a little better," Julia said as she carefully tucked Lia into Maya's open shirt before draping a blanket over them both, "And it seems to have helped. We were thinking she might need a bit of a higher setting on her CPAP, but since the meds, she has done beautifully."
"Good job Peanut," Maya said, looking down at Lia who was very much awake, "Are your lungs getting stronger?"
Lia moved her tiny arm, resting it on Maya's chest.
"Ok," Julia said, "I will be around to check on her later, but I am never far so if you need me, just let me know."
"Dr. Bishop-Deluca, here you go," the nurse from earlier said, bringing Carina over a chair.
"Grazie," Carina said, "And please, while I am here as a mamma, it's Carina."
"Ok," the nurse nodded, "Did either of you need anything?"
"I am good," Maya said as Carina shook her head.
"Ok," the nurse said, "I will leave you to your bonding."
"Ciao Lia," Carina said, reaching out and touching Lia's hand, "Did you get some good sleep tonight?"
"I'm glad she did ok tonight," Maya said, eyes never leaving the tiny human on her chest, "But I'm sad she was struggling with her breathing and we weren't here for her."
"You also needed sleep Bambina," Carina said, "And she had the best team of nurses caring for her. I know they took great care of her."
Carina was actually slightly glad they hadn't been down here when Lia started having more issues with her breathing. Carina had witnessed the newborn struggling to breathe when she had come down to the NICU right after she was born and it was terrifying to see such a tiny baby struggle like that and it was not something she ever wanted Maya to witness if she didn't have to. The first hour she had been down here with Lia had been pretty terrifying as she watched the baby get evaluated and stuck with an IV and put on CPAP and everything else that had to happen during her first hour.
"What are you thinking?" Maya asked, drawing Carina out of her thoughts.
"Just about Lia," Carina said, not really wanting to talk about the thoughts she was having with her wife at the moment, "She looks so content cuddled up on you."
"I don't ever want to move," Maya sighed, looking down at Lia who was just lying there, tiny eyes open as she looked up at her mommy.
"Do you think her eyes will stay this color?" Maya asked, "I mean, Nora's started this color and now hers are brown."
"They could," Carina nodded, "It is not uncommon for babies' eye color to change as they get older. We will just have to wait and see."
"She is so tiny," Maya said as she held firm pressure on Lia's back.
"Si," Carina said, "She is. Though she is over double the size of the tiniest bambino I have ever delivered."
"Woah," Maya said, eyes wide, "How big was that baby?"
"1 lb. 3 oz," Carina said, shaking her head a little bit, "They were so tiny. But they did really well. The mamma had three other bambini after that so I saw him grow up and aside from needing glasses and having asthma, he was fine. And those things happen to babies who are born at term regularly."
"Hopefully Lia doesn't have too many problems," Maya said, trying to keep herself calm as she focused on the baby in her arms, "Or any problems. That would be best."
"Whatever happens, we will help her through it," Carina assured her wife, "She is already doing such an amazing job."
The three of them just sat there for a little while until Lia got squirmy, starting to fuss.
"Shhhh," Maya said, rocking her a little bit, "It's ok Lia. You are ok."
The baby didn't quite seem to buy it though, starting to cry more. Julia came over just then to check on them.
"What's going on Lia?" she asked, quickly checking vitals, seeing Lia was doing ok there, "I bet she needs a diaper change. She is due for one."
"Ok," Maya said, not totally sure what to do.
"Would you like me to teach you how to change her?" Julia asked, "It's not much different than any other newborn except she is smaller."
"Ok," Maya said, nodding as Julia lifted Lia off she chest, laying her back in her incubator, the tiny baby still crying.
"It's ok Trottolina," Carina said, going around to the other side of the incubator, "We are going to get you feeling better."
"Ok," Julia said, coming over to them with the tiniest diapers Maya had ever seen along with warm wipes, "So the goal is to be as fast as you can while still getting her clean. We want to keep her as warm as possible so we used warmed wipes. Other than that, it's just like any other diaper change. Are you ready?"
"Not really," Maya said, looking at the tiny diaper in her hand.
"Do you want me to do it Bambina?" Carina asked.
"No, I think I can do it," Maya said, biting her lip, "I just...I don't want to hurt her."
"I will be right here," Julia said, "And I can help you through the whole thing. You've got this."
"Ok," Maya said, taking a deep breath before taking the warm wipes, getting everything ready before opening Lia's diaper, quickly cleaning her up before putting the new tiny diaper on.
"That was great," Julia said, taking the diaper from Maya, "That is exactly what you should have done. You can hold her again if you want to."
"Carina, you should," Maya said, "She could probably use some Mamma cuddles."
"Are you sure?" Carina asked, wanting desperately to hold the baby but knowing Maya had really been struggling with being away from Lia.
"I'm sure," Maya said, "You are her mamma. She needs you too."
"Ok," Carina said, unbuttoning her shirt before carefully picking up the newborn, cuddling her against her chest before she went to sit down.
Normally, the NICU staff didn't let parents start picking up preemies Lia's size independently right away, but Carina was an exception to the rules because she was used to dealing with things like this. She quickly settled in the chair, Maya sitting down next to her, wrapping a blanket over Lia.
"I didn't even know they made diapers that were as small as the one I just put on her," Maya said, staring at the baby as she laid on her mamma's chest, eyes open.
"They haven't been around too long," Carina said, "I think maybe just since the early 2000's. The nurses I worked with when I very first started medical school were very excited about them. They are micro preemie size I think. They make a smaller size too, for babies under two pounds."
"I can't even imagine," Maya said, "Those have to be like, the size of my finger."
"They are very small," Carina nodded, "But those babies are also very small."
They sat there again, Lia clearly fighting sleep as her little eyes blinked slowly.
"You can sleep Trottolina," Carina said, rubbing her back, "You are safe. You can sleep. I am right here and Mommy is right there. You can close your eyes and rest."
"She always relaxed when you talked to her while she was inside," Maya said, smiling as she watched Lia's eyes slip closed and stay that way, "She is already a mamma's girl. She is smart though. That is my favorite place to sleep too."
"I love when any of my girls sleep here," Carina said, leaning down and pressing a small kiss to Lia's head around the CPAP.
They just sat there together for a while, Maya going into a room off the NICU to express milk to try to keep her body on a schedule. She was still only getting about a mL, but Carina assured her that was ok.
Around 7:30, Pam, the day shift nurse from the day before came around to do her morning assessments, having to do a heel stick to get a little bit of blood for some tests while Lia did not like and started crying as soon as she did it.
"It's ok Trottolina," Carina said, rubbing her back as Pam quickly got the blood she needed, "It's all done. You are ok."
"I'm sorry," Pam said as she finished up, "We have to check her bilirubin levels and her hemoglobin and a few other things."
"It's ok," Carina said, Lia already calm again after the stick, "We know."
Pam left them to go continue on with her other duties as Carina looked over at Maya who looked so sad.
"She's ok Bambina," Carina said, "She is already settled again."
"I just hate that she is having any pain right now," Maya sighed, "I never want her to feel pain and she is so little."
"I know," Carina said, feeling the same way, "But we were right here to help her and now she is all better, right Trottolina? Would it make you feel better to hold her again?"
"Maybe," Maya said, biting her lip, "I just don't want to take away from your time with her."
"I am ok," Carina said, "I will have plenty of time to hold her."
Before transferring her back to Maya, Carina changed Lia's diaper again before settling the slightly perturbed baby on her wife's chest which almost immediately calmed both Maya and Lia down. For the next little while, they just sat there, Carina taking some pictures of Lia but mostly they just sat in silence, Maya holding Lia with one hand while her other one was holding Carina's hand as they both just took in the tiny baby.
"We probably need to go back upstairs," Carina said finally around 9:15, "Just so you can be there for rounds and to make sure everything is still going well. You also probably need something to eat and more to drink."
"I don't want to leave her though," Maya sighed. "We can come back down later," Carina assured her, "But we need to go back upstairs for a little while."
"Fine," Maya sighed. Just then, Pam was coming around to check on them again.
"Are you guys getting ready to go?" she asked, noticing Carina was standing.
"Si," the Italian said, "Maya need to be upstairs for rounds and for some food."
"Both of those things are very important," Pam nodded, as she moved to pick up Lia, "And little miss Lia here will be just fine sleeping in her bed."
"I love you Lia," Maya said, kissing the top of her head, Carina doing the same before Pam took her, putting her back into the incubator.
"Alright," Carina said, "Let's get you back upstairs."
Carina grabbed the now empty bag that the NICU gave them to continue bringing milk for Lia while Maya had her water bottle, their hands linked together.
"Can we come back down as soon as rounds and breakfast are over?" Maya asked, yawning a little bit.
"I think you might need to have a little rest," Carina said, seeing the exhaustion on her wife's face, "Lia will be just fine getting some rest in her incubator."
"I'm not that tired," Maya said, "I can sleep tonight."
"Bambina, you had a baby less than 24 hours ago," Carina said, not wanting to fight but also not wanting her wife to push herself to the point of exhaustion, "And you are still not 100%. Let's see how you are feeling after we get everything done this morning? And see what whoever is working OB today says, ok? I think it is Dr. Davis, but I cannot remember."
"Fine," Maya mumbled, knowing deep down that her wife was right.
They got back to the floor, Maya using the bathroom before settling back into bed, Carina sitting down next to her.
"Can I get you anything Bambina?" Carina asked, "Do you want more to drink or I can order some breakfast?"
"Maybe something to drink," Maya said, "Am I allowed to have coffee?"
"Allowed medically? Probably," Carina nodded, "Allowed by your wife who knows you are just trying to get out of the rest your body desperately needs? No. Maybe after a nap."
"Carina, I just want to be with our baby," Maya snapped a little.
"Lo so," Carina said, "And I want you to be with her too, but I also want you to be ok and sleep is part of that."
Before Maya could argue more, there was a knock at the door and in came Dr. Davis.
"Hello Maya," Dr. Davis said, "How are you feeling this morning?"
"Physically? Alright," Maya said, "I mean, I am achy but not any more than I was yesterday."
"Have you been using the bathroom alright?" Dr. Davis asked, grabbing the thermometer.
"Yeah," Maya said, "It doesn't feel good, but yeah."
"Good," Dr. Davis said, slipping the thermometer under Maya's tongue, "Let's see how this fever is doing."
After a few seconds, the thermometer beeped, Dr. Davis pulling it out.
"100.8," she said, "Not quite what we want, but not terrible. And your labs all look good so I am not overly concerned right now. Hopefully if you keep drinking and resting, it will help break that fever. Now, I want to just do a quick pelvic exam and then we will be good to go."
"Ok," Maya said as Carina helped her get her pajama pants down, Dr. Davis quickly doing her exam.
"Everything looks great," Dr. Davis said, "Your stitches are holding and your bleeding is pretty minimal. If we can get that fever to come down, I will let you go home tomorrow morning."
"What?" Maya said, eyes wide.
She knew discharge was coming. She knew Lia would be here longer than she would, but the thought of not being in the same building as her new baby sent a feeling of pure panic through her body. She didn't even fully realize she was having a panic attack until she felt Carina's cold hands on her cheeks.
"Breathe Bambina," she heard as the ringing in her ears started to dissipate some, "There you go. Just breathe. You are ok. I am right here."
"I...I can't... I need..." Maya said, feeling herself start to hyperventilate again.
"Shhhh," Carina said, "Just breathe with me, ok? We will figure it out, but you have to breathe."
"How are we supposed to leave her here?" Maya sobbed out once her breathing was back under control.
"I know," Carina said, trying desperately hard not to start crying too, "I know, but she needs to be here and for you, the best place to be will be at home. We can come and see her every single day and we can take turns being here so she isn't alone. And I know it is going to be hard. I am so scared of leaving her too, but we will figure it out, ok? "
"I wish I was still pregnant," Maya said through her tears, "I know I complained about it all the time, but now, I wish I still was. I just want her with me...with us. I want her here."
"I know," Carina said, rubbing her back, "I know you do. But you didn't do anything to cause this, ok? It just is what happened. And it is not ideal, but we are going to figure it out together. I am right here with you."
Carina just held her wife close as the tears calmed down and after a few minutes, Maya was sound asleep, clinging to her wife. Carina knew that Maya needed to eat and hydrate, but she also knew that sleep was not coming easily at the moment and so any amount of it she could allow her postpartum wife to have, she was going to.
Carina carefully pulled her phone out of her pocket, checking to see if she had any messages. She had a lot, but she quickly scrolled to the ones from Amelia, smiling when she opened them and saw Nora sitting on the counter helping Amelia make eggs for breakfast and another one of Rowan and Harper walking around holding babies in their arms. Amelia also asked how things were going and if tit was ok if the twins stayed home with them for the day since she and Link were both off work. She assured Carina that both the twins were doing well. Nora has been a little bit upset first thing in the morning, but after some cuddles with her sister and helping make breakfast, she seemed to be doing really well.
Carina told Amelia that things were going as well as could be expected. Lia was doing great and Maya was sleeping at the moment. She asked if Amelia would be ok waiting about an hour and a half before bringing the twins by.
She wanted to let Maya sleep as much as possible and also wanted to try to get some food in her. She was hoping the blonde would sleep longer than an hour, but she also knew that it was unlikely. Carina scanned through the rest of the messages, not seeing any that were urgent at the moment so she just decided to wait.
It was at that moment that she realized they hadn't told Maya's mom yet. She knew that Andrea had texted Mason because he told her he did, but they had completely forgotten to tell Katherine. Carina decided that maybe once Maya was awake and feeling better, they could figure out how they wanted to tell her.
It made Carina a little sad to think that it would likely be a long time before Lia met her one living grandparent who was still allowed in her life, but Katherine couldn't come back to Seattle. She had tried once, not long after she had moved away, but she had ended up having several panic attacks and struggling to even leave her hotel room out of fear of seeing Lane. It had been really upsetting to Maya at the time and she had blamed herself a lot for not seeing the abuse easier, but after several discussions with Carina, she was able to recognize that it was not her place to have done that and also that it was in the past and nothing they did now was going to change that.
Instead, they decided to just go visit Katherine instead which worked out fine. She lived just outside San Francisco and Maya, Carina, Mason, Laila and the kids tried to get down there at least once a year.
This year was going to be harder because between Mason and Laila having Nathan and Lia being a preemie, travel was going to be tricky. But that was a problem for another day. For now, their main focus had to be on getting Maya and Lia both better. The blonde shifted against her wife, Carina rubbing her back gently, coaxing her to stay asleep.
Carina set her phone down, deciding to try to close her eyes too, exhausted herself from the less-than-ideal sleep that had been happening over the past few days. She didn't really fully fall asleep, but she also wasn't completely awake either, just letting herself relax.
She didn't open her eyes again until she felt something shifting and opened her eyes to find Maya waking up. She also noticed that both of them were all sweaty which was gross, but she also noticed Maya was cooler than she had felt since yesterday which was a good sign.
"Hi Bambina," Carina said as Maya's eyes opened.
"Hi," Maya said, yawning a little, "I didn't mean to sleep."
"You needed it," Carina said, "How are you feeling?"
"Wet," Maya said, "Am I sweating?"
"Si," Carina nodded, "I think you might have broken your fever. You feel much less hot. Also, it is not very uncommon for mammas to sweat extra after they give birth. You have a lot of extra fluid in your body when you are pregnant that your body wants out now that it doesn't need it for the baby."
"Oh," Maya said, nodding, "Well, it's gross. Can we shower?"
"I think that would be a good idea," Carina said, laughing, "Because as much as I love you, I do not love being covered in your sweat."
"I am pretty sure you have told me the opposite many times," Maya said, raising an eyebrow, "Usually when we are in bed...naked."
"That is different," Carina said, rolling her eyes, "Now, are you ready to go shower?"
After they were both clean and changed into clothes, they decided to order food, Maya realizing how hungry she was. Just as they finished putting in the order, Carina's phone buzzed.
"It's Amelia," Carina said, "She asked if she could stop by with the bambine at some point and I told her to wait an hour and a half and that was about an hour and a half ago so they are just about to come up here if that's ok?"
"Of course," Maya said, "I figured they were at daycare."
"Amelia asked if she could keep them home with her kids and I told her it was fine. She said they were doing well. Nora was a little upset this morning, but she did ok," Carina said.
"Are you going to go home with them tonight?" Maya asked, biting her lip.
"Do you want me to stay?" the Italian asked.
"If the twins need you, you should go home," Maya said, "Or if you need to sleep in your own bed."
"That was not what I asked," Carina said, brushing a piece of hair that was still damp from the shower behind Maya's ear, "Do you want me here tonight?"
Maya looked down at her hands, nodding ever so slightly, "But if the girls need you at home, I want you to go with them. I don't want this to be any more traumatic for them than it already has been."
"Ok," Carina said, "Hopefully, they will be happy to spend another night with Harper and Scout and then tomorrow, we can both be home with them."
"I want to be home with them, don't get me wrong, but I really don't want to leave," Maya said, trying not to start crying again.
"I know," Carina said, "I know Bambina. Neither do I, but we will be here every day to spend time with Lia. The NICU is always open for parents so we can spend as much time here as we want."
"When do you have to go back to work?" Maya asked, changing the subject.
"I haven't discussed that with Bailey yet," Carina sighed, "I want to make sure I am home with you now helping you recover, but I also want to take some time when Lia is discharged to help her settle in. I was thinking maybe two weeks now and the rest later? But we can see how you are feeling and how Lia is doing, ok?"
Maya nodded, leaning her head on her wife's shoulder.
"We are going to figure this out Bambina," Carina said, pressing a kiss to her wife's forehead. Just then, they hear noise from the hallway and Carina moved to get up just as the door opened.
"Hey," Amelia said, walking in with Nora and Rowan who both had big gift bags in their hands, "Look who I brought."
"Hey Piccola," Carina smiled, "Hi Patatina. Did you have fun with Auntie Amelia?"
"Si," Nora said, "We went shopping. Here."
"What are these?" Maya asked, looking confused at the neurosurgeon.
"Just open them," Amelia said, shrugging, "Nora has one that is more for Lia, and Rowan's is more for the two of you."
"Come up here," Maya said, gesturing to the twins.
"Mommy's feeling better?" Rowan asked.
"Yes," Maya nodded, "I am feeling better. Just be gentle, ok?"
Carina helped the twins, along with their bags, up into the bed, one on either side of Maya.
"Alright," Maya said, "Now, let's see what you two have."
Maya took the bag from Nora, opening it to reveal what is inside.
"Oh my goodness," Maya said, pulling out the tiniest outfits she had ever seen, "What did you do Amelia?"
"Well, we decided Lia could use some clothes," Amelia shrugged, "So the twins, Harper, and I went shopping this morning for some things. The girls picked everything out, I just made sure it was the right size and may have steered them in a direction I thought you guys might like. And I washed all of it in baby laundry soap we use because Harper's skin is so sensitive. I hope that's ok."
"It's perfect," Maya said, tears filling her eyes, "These are perfect."
There were several different outfits in the bag, Maya carefully taking each one out. They were mostly very much the style that Maya and Carina dressed the twins in, lots of neutral tones and patterns. There were also a few that were much more colorful.
"I picked that one," Nora said, pointing to a sleeper that was pink with dinosaurs.
"And I picked that one," Rowan said as Maya pulled out a red one with fireworks.
"These are perfect," Carina said, looking at the clothes on Maya's bed, "Thank you so much Amelia."
"Well, I figured you probably weren't totally prepared to have a little preemie," Amelia shrugged, "And I know sometimes it takes them a while to be able to wear clothes, but I wanted to make sure she had some."
Just then, Maya's and Carina's breakfast was brought in, Carina helping the woman from the dining staff set it down.
"Do you want this now Bambina?" Carina asked.
"Um, yeah, kinda," Maya said, "I am starving."
Carina carefully opened up the pancakes, moving the tray closer to Maya.
"Tan I have some?" Rowan asked when she saw the fruit on the tray.
"Sure," Maya smiled, stabbing a strawberry and feeding it to Rowan. Nora, of course, also wanted some. Carina gestured for Amelia to sit down in a chair as she also sat on the bed, opening her food also, sharing with the twins who were apparently starving.
"I swear I fed them this morning," Amelia said, shaking her head.
"It's fine," Carina said, laughing as she put a piece of pancake in Rowan's mouth. After the food was gone, Rowan realized there was still an unopened gift.
"Mamma, open this one," the little blonde said, handing the bag in her hand to Carina.
"Ok," the Italian said, reaching into the bag, pulling out some of her and Maya's favorite snacks along with a bottle of champagne, two pairs of pajamas, and a very soft blanket.
"Thank you Amelia," Carina said, looking at her best friend, "You did not need to do this."
"I know," Amelia shrugged, "But I wanted to. Moms needs presents too after having a baby. And I made sure the pajamas were button ups because I know how important that skin to skin is for preemies. And I thought the blanket might be good for keeping Lia warm when you snuggle her."
"Thank you Amelia," Maya said, tears welling up in her eyes.
"It's what friends are for," Amelia said.
"Why are you sad Mommy?" Nora asked, seeing the tears on Maya's face.
"I'm not sad," Maya said, looking at her daughter, "I am grateful that Auntie Amelia is such a nice friend."
"Bambine, remember how we talked about that Mommy had lots of hormones in her body when Trottolino was still inside," Carina said, getting the twins' attention, "Well, now that she is outside, Mommy's body has different hormones that are helping her make food for Lia and all the hormones that were helping Lia grow are changing and going away and new ones are coming and it can make Mommy feel big feelings, ok?"
"But Mommy is ok," Nora said, nodding.
"And we tan give her big hugs and kisses to help her feel better," Rowan said, looking at her sister before they both leaned over and gave Maya a big hug.
"Thank you both so much," Maya said, rubbing the twins' backs, "This is helping so much."
"Damn Carina," Amelia said quietly, coming up next to her, "I could have used you to explain that to Scout when Harper was born. I swear I scared that kid more than once with my epic meltdowns when she was first born."
"I try to just explain everything that's going on to them in a way they can understand," Carina shrugged, "And because Maya was so emotional her whole pregnancy, but especially when she had HG, we explained hormones to them the same day they found out about the baby. Both of them, but especially Rowan, like to know what is going on. Nora does too, but Rowan likes the details."
"She is so much like Maya," Amelia said, shaking her head.
Carina looked over, seeing the twins showing Maya all the clothes they had picked out for Lia, explaining each one. "How is your peanut doing?" Amelia asked, looking back at Carina.
"She's doing pretty well," Carina said, "She's up a bit on her CPAP, but her numbers look good. She is tolerating feedings well. Overall, she's perfect for her age."
"That's awesome," Amelia smiled. "Si," Carina nodded, "We spent some time down there with her this morning, cuddling her. She loves being held skin to skin."
"I might have to sneak to the NICU and see her one of these days," Amelia said.
"We can take you," Maya said, overhearing the conversation, "I want to get back down there soon."
"That's ok," Amelia said, "I want to let you two have your bonding time with her right now. I'll come in a few days. I was actually going to take these two home with me if that's ok with you. Link is home with Harper and Scout and we were going to go to the park with them, but I can leave them here if you want."
"I think Maya is going to be here one more night," Carina said, "Just to make sure her fever is really gone and everything is ok. Are you sure you are ok taking them another night?"
"Of course," Amelia said, "Honestly, they make my kids behave better so I will take them any time."
"Nora and Rowan, would it be ok if you spent one more night with Zia Amelia and Zio Link and Harper and Scout?" Carina asked, going over to the bed where the twins were curled up with Maya.
"Does Mommy still need extra cuddles?" Nora asked, biting her lip a little as she looked at Carina.
"She does," Carina nodded, sitting down, "And I would really like to be able to give her those extra cuddles. And then, tomorrow night, Mommy and I will both be home and all four of us can cuddle as much as you want."
"And my baby Totoino?" Rowan asked, looking excited.
"No, Patatina, remember, Lia is going to have to stay here for a while until she gets bigger," Maya said.
"But it has been a yong time," Rowan said, pouting.
"Lia isn't even one day old yet," Carina said chuckling, "She is probably going to have to stay here until close to when we finish cutting all the papers off our paper chain."
"No," Rowan said, shaking her head, "No, that's too many days."
"I know," Maya said, trying not to start crying, "But she is too tiny to come home. But we can bring you to see her sometimes, ok?"
"I want my baby Totoino Yia to be at home," Rowan said.
"So do we," Carina said, "But we also don't want her to be very sick and the only way to make sure she isn't very sick is for her to be here for a while."
"But I want to hold her," Rowan said.
"We have to wait to for her to get a little bit bigger first," Maya said, "But once she is, we will let you hold her, ok?"
"Fine," Rowan sighed, clearly unhappy with the answer but accepting it.
"Tan't you tome home today?" Nora asked.
"I can't, Piccola," Maya said, "I wasn't feeling very well last night, but I feel much better now. But just to be extra safe, the doctors want me to stay here one more night and then I can come home."
"And you need Mamma's cuddles to feel better?" Nora asked.
"I would like it very much if I could have some of Mamma's cuddles," Maya nodded, "Is that ok?"
"Okay," Nora said, cuddling closer to Maya, "But tomorrow, I tan have yots of Mamma cuddles? And Mommy cuddles too?"
"Tomorrow, you can have all the mamma and mommy cuddles you want," Carina assured her, rubbing her back.
"Okay," Nora nodded, "I tan sweep at Zia Mamelia's."
"You should be so proud of yourself Piccola," Carina said, smiling at her, "And it is ok to be sad and miss Mommy and me. We are safe and you are safe and we love you so so much."
"And you can call us tonight before you go to bed and hopefully I will be awake this time," Maya said.
"Tan we cuddle for a yittle bit more?" Nora asked.
"Of course," Maya said.
"Mamma too," Nora said. Carina moved, sitting next to her wife, the twins cuddling with them, Rowan on Carina and Nora on Maya which Maya was a bit afraid would hurt, but it luckily didn't too much, though her boobs were getting pretty sore.
"Ok," Carina said once the twins started getting antsy, "I think it is time to get going."
"Yeah, Nora and Rowan, we have to go pick up some lunch to take home," Amelia said, "I need your help to get it."
"But not piza," Rowan said, giving Amelia a look.
"Not pizza," Amelia laughed, "Never pizza again unless your mamma orders it. I was thinking maybe some sandwiches and soup and we can maybe get a treat too?"
"Yike a brownie?" Rowan asked, perking up. "That sounds like a great idea," Amelia nodded as Carina moved to get up.
"I love you Mommy," Nora said, giving her a hug, "I hope you aren't sick nanymore."
"Thank you Nora Mae," Maya said, pressing a kiss into the top of her head, "I love you too."
"I love you Mommy," Rowan said, "And my baby Totoino Yia."
"I will tell her when I see her, ok Ro?" Maya said, giving her a hug, "I love you too."
Carina gave the twins big hugs and kisses, Nora insisting Amelia carry her when they left, though she didn't cry which was good.
"I hate leaving them," Maya sighed, tears in her own eyes as Carina walked back over to her.
"We will be back with them tomorrow," Carina said, brushing a piece of hair off Maya's face, "Now, what do you need?"
"I need to get milk and then go see Lia," Maya said, wiping her eyes.
Carina helped her and soon enough, they were heading back down to the NICU, things much simpler this time because Maya didn't have a fever anymore. They quickly went over to Lia's bed, immediately noticing that something was very different about their little girl.
"Hey," Pam said, coming over as soon as she saw them, "So Lia's bilirubin levels came back elevated so she is going to be under these lights for a little while. She is just fine and we usually see really good results with the phototherapy, but she does have to stay under those lights for 23 hours a day until her numbers start coming down."
"Is she ok?" Maya asked, fear filling her body as she looked at the harsh light on the baby, her eyes covered with the tiniest eye mask she had ever seen.
"She is," Pam assured her, "It is a very normal thing, especially in preemies."
"How many days does she have to be under the lights?" Maya asked.
"Until her levels go down," Pam said, "For some babies, it just takes a day. For others, it is a few days."
"Wait," Maya said, "Did you say she has to be under the lights for 23 hours a day? But how can she be held like that?"
"Bambina, she can't," Carina said, knowing what was going on.
"But... what?" Maya said, "No. She needs to be held. I need to hold her."
"I am so sorry," Pam said, "We will have her take 2 30-minute breaks in the next 24 hours, one at the 12-hour mark and another one around the 24-hour mark. So that will be around 10 pm and then tomorrow at 10 am so if you are here then, you can hold her then. And I promise as soon as her levels stabilize, you can hold her as much as you want to. You can put your hand in and hold her hand if you want. But you can't put your hand on her back or anything just to make sure she is getting the most exposure to the light."
"Does it hurt her?" Maya asked, walking closer to the incubator.
"Not at all," Pam said, "She isn't hurting at all from it. Here, let me move the chairs closer so you can hold her hand. And you can talk to her too. She has to wear the eye mask to protect her eyes from the lights, but she can still hear you."
"Ok," Maya said as she and Carina sat down in the chairs. "Do you have any other questions for me?" Pam asked, getting everything adjusted so Lia's hand could be held.
"No," Maya said, slipping her hand into the incubator, Lia's teeny tiny fingers wrapping around it, "Thanks."
"I will be around if you need anything," Pam said.
"Oh, here is Lia's milk," Carina said, handing the cooler to Pam.
"Oh, perfect," Pam said, "This is exactly what she needs to help with the jaundice. Combined with the lights, it works very well."
"What are you thinking Bambina?" Carina asked, putting a hand on her wife's back.
"Now we can't even hold her?" Maya said, tears in her eyes, "She just has to stay in that box all alone and we can't even hold her."
"She isn't alone," Carina assured her, "We are right here with her. It will just before a little while. Many babies go through this. Even Harper had to get phototherapy when she was first born."
"I know," Maya said, blinking the tears back, "I know that, but I just...I feel like everything just keeps happening and I just want it to stop so that we can hold out baby and take care of her and not leave her in a box. She shouldn't even be born yet. She shouldn't be away from us."
"I know," Carina said, leaning closer to her wife, "I feel the same way. But at this point, there is very little we can do about that because she is here so now, we just have to help support her in the very best way we can, and for today, that means we don't hold her."
"Mamma and I are right here Lia," Maya said through the opening in the incubator, "We are both right here with you. You are so strong and we love you so much and as soon as you are better, we will hold you for a long time."
"Ti voglio bene Cecelia," Carina said as the two of them settled into their chairs, Maya holding Lia's hand while Carina held her wife's, both of them just starting at their newborn and silently hoping she would get better soon.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
What did you think? A little more time with Little Tiny Lia. I am so sorry it took me so long to get this chapter out. Life has been real crazy the past few weeks between starting my externship, impulsively taking (and passing) my nursing boards, and starting my final semester of nursing school, I have been really busy. I am hoping that now that my NCLEX is over, the semester has officially started, and I am slowly settling into this new schedule, I will be able to find time to write more, but I honestly don't know yet. I promise I will update as often as I can, but I have decided not to give an exact time frame because things are just too unpredictable right now. Thank you all for hanging in there with me. And thank you all for reading, commenting, and voting. It is amazing to see.