The FTRS crew is 16
"How did I get dragged into this?" Jax whines as he sits down beside me. I'm in the library with the rest of the FTRS crew and Jax was the last one to join us.
"What happened this time?" I ask, closing the book that I was previously reading.
"I have to be in a parade. On a float. A fancy one. And I have to wear a fancy suit." He tells us, laying his head on the table.
I try not to laugh. Really, I did! But I couldn't help it. I burst out laughing, almost crying from laughter. I know that I really shouldn't be laughing at my friend's misfortune, it was just too funny to me.
"Yeah, yeah, laugh all you want Thief, but I also get to bring someone with me in the parade. Guess who I'm going to pick now." Jax said, glaring over at me.
"No." I say immediately, opening my book again and starting to read.
"You have to. Just like how I have to be in the parade. Your coming." Jax said, narrowing his eyes even more. I back stare at him with a blank expression on my face.
"Fine." I finally say, looking back down at the pages even though I couldn't entirely focus on the words at the moment.
Everyone seems surprised by my answer.
"Wait, really? You're not going to have a huge argument about this? You're just going to agree?" Ollie asks, raising an eyebrow at me.
"What's the point? You're just going to somehow get me to do it anyway. I don't see the point in fighting when I'm going to lose anyway." I explain, not looking up.
"Sounds good to me. I'll tell Raz that you need a dress." Jax says, finally walking over to the shelves and choosing a book.
I shake my head before closing my book and standing from the table.
"Fine. I'm going to my room then. Have fun planning the parade and everything." I say, walking out the door. I immediately go to the gym instead. Push-ups help me think.
Time Skip~~~
It's the day of the parade today. When I woke up, I found the dress I was supposed to wear today. I'd been told that me and Jax would have matching colors and a matching style.
As soon as I got the dress on, someone burst into my dorm room and immediately got to work on my hair and makeup.
I'd managed to convince them to choose a high ponytail and fairly simple makeup. I didn't want anything to fancy, and I'm glad that they understood that.
The dress I wore was a light purple color at the top, like Jax's eyes, but it slowly faded into a dark purple, like the streak in my hair. The dress stopped with the front just barely below my knees and the back of the dress halfway to my ankles. (It's a high-low dress)
Somehow (Jax probably helped) I was allowed to wear my boots. The laces had been switched out with more purple, even though I protested. There was one piece of clothing that wasn't purple though. It was a pair of sky-blue fingerless gloves.
Jax walks into the room. He's wearing a suit. The suit jacket is violet and the pants are dark purple. He also has a pair of blue fingerless gloves.
"Nice. Matching outfits. Great. Fabulous." I say flatly, twirling the end of my ponytail around my finger.
"You look nice." Jax says, ignoring my comment.
"Jeez, now I feel bad about being sarcastic. You need to stop doing that... And I guess you look nice as well... Thank you." I mutter, tugging at my gloves.
"You're welcome. And thank you. Now come on, they're waiting for us." Jax says, taking my hand and leading me to the door.
"No. They're waiting for you. I'm just the second book in a 'buy one get one free' deal." I correct, taking my hand back and walking out to the float.
I feel guilty almost immediately, but I keep walking. I have no clue why I did that. I guess I just needed to remind myself that I'm not the important person here. I'm not the person that people want to see. Jax is. I'm not jealous. I don't even like being the center of attention. So why am I being like this?
You like him.
No. Go away. I don't need those thoughts. Not right now.
You want him to hold your hand. You're just scared.
No. Stop that. No. NO.
You're in love. You're scared he doesn't feel the same. You're scared it will ruin things.
It will. Now go away.
Not until you admit it.
No. That will just make things worse.
"Thief! Slow down! How are you so fast?" Jax calls after me, jogging to catch up.
No. Don't look at him. He's mad at you for pushing him away. Don't let it hurt you.
He likes you too.
Since when is Kayla in my head? Or is it Maxine? AG?
I keep walking, not looking back. Then someone spins me around and hugs me tightly.
"It will be okay Gilly." Jax says. Then he lets go and looks me in the eye. "They love you. How could they not?"
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NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! NOPE! NO!
This can't be happening! Nope! No! Not right now! Please not right now!
"Yeah. Sure. Let's just go." I say, trying to avoid eye contact.
"I'm serious Gilly. Everyone loves you. You don't have to worry." Jax says, taking my hand as he starts walking again.
"Thank you." I whisper finally, blushing.
NO NO NO NO NO NO NO! NOPE! NO THANK YOU! STOP IT GILLY! DON'T LET YOUR EMOTIONS DO THIS TO YOU! DON'T LET YOUR FEELING RUIN EVERYTHING! GILLY, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!?!
I've let go of his hand, only to hold onto his arm. Like he's escorting me to a dance or something!
AHHHHHHHHHHH!!!! WHAT AM I DOING?! WHAT AM I DOING?! WHAT AM I DOING?!
Thankfully, we're already close to the float so it isn't awkward for too long.
I step onto the float carefully, making it to the top without any trouble. Luckily for me, the float is shaped sort of like a cube so I can climb to the top and the top is smooth and flat, with just enough room for me and Jax.
As soon as we both get to the top, the leader of the parade instructs us me to put my arm around Jax's shoulders and Jax to put his arm around my waist.
A few moments later, the parade starts. Our float moves forward and I immediately see my friends standing near the start. I wave to them and they wave back. Then everyone starts waving to me and I have to wave back. So I'm waving the whole time now. About halfway through my arm gets tired.
"You look like your arm's getting tired. Do you want to trade sides so that you can use your other arm?" Jax asks me quietly.
"Yes please." I sigh, glad to be able to rest my arm.
We switch places quickly and carefully, switching arms as well. A moment after we switch places, I see my family. My face lights up and I wave to them, a smile growing on my face.
My siblings see me first. They start yelling and waving. I hear Han and Hamish yell Jax's name a few times. They look up to him a lot. They've told me that they wish he was their brother. My parents take a moment before looking at me. As soon as they do, my mom smiles brightly and waves. My father seems to look past me then he meets my eyes, gives me a knowing smile, and waves as well.
What was that smile about? What's going on? Is something funny? I look over at Jax to see if he knows what's going on, but he's looking at Han and Hamish. He's smiling and waving back at them, and for just a second, I can see them as a group of brothers. Whenever Jax comes over they want to hang out with him. All my siblings love him, but I think Han and Hamish do the most. Probably because he saved them. My parents seem to love him too, well, my mom at least. A few times I've caught my dad squinting suspiciously at him, and sometimes they'll talk quietly. I've tried to hear what Jax and my dad talk about, but I can never quite catch it.
Jax looks over at me and I realize I've been staring at him. We make eye contact and he smiles at me. I feel my face heat up, but I smile back at him. I quickly look away after, and start waving to people again.
Don't think about it. If you don't admit it, then it's not real. Don't admit it. Don't do it Gilly, it will just hurt more.
You love him.
No. I don't. I can't. I don't want that pain when he marries the perfect girl.
Maybe he'll marry you.
He won't. He'll marry a princess. Everyone knows that. Don't make me think like that. It hurts.
He loves you.
No, he doesn't. He never will. I'm just me.
While I've been thinking, the parade has come to a stop, finally at the end. I get off the float as quickly as possible, rushing back into FTRS and to my dorm.