Galen
I lie on me bed listening to Dex starting our mam's car and driving away.
Agitated, I reach out with a hand to touch me guitar, propped against the wall near me bed, but I'm feeling too riled up to play, and me fingers just glide down the smooth wood and return to come to rest on me pillow.
Seeing Paisley, having her in me arms, and kissing her was like a kick in the bollox, dislodging years' worth of stuck memories since that is the area I use to do most of me thinking... according to Dex. Now, I'm lying here wondering who I am and what life is all about and why I'm just pissing it away when I really don't have it all that bad right now.
Well, it's a common thing for me to be wondering about.
I'm finishing high school in a few months, and I still have no idea what to do with me life unless I get picked up by a professional Ice Hockey team. Perhaps Asher and Hunter have the right idea about joining the army; I could do that too. Just, ye know, a different army. Become a soldier of fortune.
Who the hell am I kidding?
I'll probably get kicked out of the army or end up killing me commanding officer. I have some issues with authority figures, mainly the fact that most of them are dicks who get off on bullying people with less power than themselves... and I don't trust men much...
Sure, some are not that bad. Briar Cove High's headmaster is a man, and he's alright. He could've expelled me many times but chose not to. I can also stand one or two of the teachers, and the rugby coach is not a total bastard. Chief Job loves to bust me ballox every chance he gets, but he's also bailed me out of trouble many times, so he's not all bad, either.
Coach Dev? Is he an authority figure or just an instrument of torture? Whether I like him or not all depends on his mood and whether he got a new stupid training idea into his head to torment us with or not. Yeah, fine; I guess he's mostly okay. We've had some laughs together.
Is Uncle Ryan an authority figure?
I have no idea why he looks out for me the way he does. Maybe he cannot tell Dex and me apart. In that case, he probably calls Dex Galen too. Why does he even care? Is it because I'm Dex's brother, and he cares about me by default because of it? He loves Emmy. He really does, and she adores him. If he loves me by default, then he should technically love her by default too, but I don't think that's true.
If loving Dex defaults to loving me, then Hunter should not hate me either, should he? But he does. Clearly, that yoke doesn't do anything by default... except talk shite. I thought that he didn't want me near Paisley because he thought I was vile and disgusting after the whole mess with Mrs Winkler's Book Club... and I actually agreed with him on that. I didn't buy his story about me, just making time with Paisley to piss him off. Why would I do that?
Now, I don't know what to think. Did he even know that I was part of that manky business?
One good thing that came out of the book club is me friendship with Tanner. We fought all the time because I liked to take jabs at him where it would hurt him the most. He is so fecking pretty, and he has a bit of a temper if you just nudge him hard enough. I obviously regret that now. I didn't know how messed up he was. I wouldn't have used him to vent me frustration if I'd known. I thought he was an arrogant golden boy who had it all.
Turns out, he is even more banjaxed than I am.
We somehow ended up being pool-and-garden boys for the mayor's wife, and she loved to invite her friends to her poolside book club whenever we were there. I never saw one damn book at those book club meetings of hers. Well, not the kind you read, anyway.
At first, Tan and I were at each other's throats all the time, but Mrs Winkler paid well, so we eventually kept our bickering and brawls to a minimum because we didn't want to lose our jobs. When we stopped fighting, we realised at some point that we got on like a house on fire. Tan really gets me, and I understand how his mind works... or, more accurately, doesn't work.
We were both so naïve and innocent at the time. I don't think we could've lost our jobs even if we tried. Neither of us questioned why we were asked to wear less and less while cleaning the pool and working in the garden. I started to feel right scundered at times, but the money was good, and the ladies were kind. They complimented me and gave me treats and gifts. I was too desperate for affection to wonder why we were doing less and less actual pool and garden maintenance work... at least at first.
It was like we'd come down in the last shower! Completely clueless!
Tan started to get edgy long before I caught on, but when he said that we should quit the job, I refused, and I think he stayed on mainly because he thought I was happy with the things that were going on, and he didn't want to leave me alone. Tan also tends to believe he deserves whatever bad things come his way, which probably played a huge role in why he stuck around for so long. If I'd told him how confused I felt (especially when the book club started to include some scary men), he would've blown the whistle long before things turned into a shite storm. He wouldn't do it for himself, but he would do it for someone else.
In fact, he did.
Dammit, I don't want to be thinking about that shite. I haven't, not in years. Paisley has stirred up a whole nest of sleeping hornets in me head. Me skin feels too tight, me brain is screaming, and the bedroom I share with Dex, quite large as bedrooms go, is suffocating me right now.
I roll off me bed, pull on me sneakers, grab a jacket and run from the house, taking shortcuts to the main road and across it until I'm running through the bushes down to the beach. The wind, wet with sea spray, tangles in me hair, blowing the unpleasant thoughts from me mind, restoring some sense of peace to it.
I walk along the beach, getting sand in me shoes, but I don't care. The wind is bracing, the sun has set, and the night sky is a wee bit overcast. I'm at the main beach, near the steps leading back up to the main street, when I see someone else on the beach, alone in the dark and the cold wind, and she doesn't seem to be dressed for it in just a blouse and a long skirt.
She's standing near the water line, staring out to sea, and though I cannot see her expression, I can read the set of her shoulders. She has her arms wrapped protectively over the thin material of her blouse and her long dark hair is blowing freely in the wind. The lass is not happy. As if to confirm my assessment, a sob rides the wind to me ears, tugging at me heart.
"Hey!' I call out to her, and seeing me this close to her, she jumps with fright. She clearly didn't see or hear me coming. She shouldn't be out here alone. Briar Cove is known as a safe town, but there are some bad apples within reach, very bad, as Tanner tends to make us aware all too often. The guy is like a metal detector for perverts! The police should employ him full-time. He'd round them all up, not by his superior investigative skills, but simply by living his life.
"It's okay, lass, I'm not going to hurt ye. I just want to know if ye're alright, is all," I say when she tries to run up the beach towards the stairs, but her shoes are sinking into the sand, causing her to stumble. Really, the girl would've been a sitting duck if I were out to harm her. She'd stand no chance.
I don't like feeling like a predator, so I close the gap between us and step in front of her, forcing her to stop or crash into me.
"Hey, everything's alright," I assure her since she's clearly plankin' it.
"Declan McKenna?" she asks before looking up at me.
It's the accent, I know.
"Close enough," I say, not offended at all. Dex and I are twins, after all, and me brother is up on stage every Monday; the whole school knows him. People, who really know at least one of us can tell us apart at a glance, others not so much. Even the ones who know of me existence get it wrong, but how can I blame them? I confuse similar-looking people with each other all the time, and they usually don't even look similar on purpose.
She's frowning at me, as far as I can tell, and she seems to be wary of me. I don't blame her. I'm not Dex, I don't have that whole knight in shining armour thing going on, and unlike me effing brother, I'm no saint.
"Are ye alright?" I ask again because she doesn't seem alright. She is shivering badly, and what I can see of her face is wet with tears. She's still really pretty, though. Delicate features, high cheekbones, long straight black hair. I think it's black, the moon is not visible tonight, and the beach is dark. Her eyes seem to be black too.
I've seen her before. She sometimes hangs out with the Bimbo Squad, Melissa and her bitches. This one never seems to fit, though. She's always lagging a step behind or to the side, looking mortified by her friends' entitled behaviour. Like an ant clinging desperately to the edge of a glass, wondering if it wouldn't be better to let go, fall to the ground and get the hell out of there if it survives.
I can picture her from memory now that I know who she is. I've noticed her very well. I always notice feeks. Glossy hair, very nearly black, eyes like polished obsidian and smooth skin the colour of milky coffee. She has way too much class and poise to be hanging out with those tyre biters. And here she is now with tears drying on her cheeks and her hair tangling in the wind.
What is her story?
I pull off me jacket and drape it around her shoulders. She tries to side-step it, frightened by me actions, but when I don't grab her, she nestles into the warmth of the jacket. I'm surprised. I expected rejection of me kind gesture, but the girl is clearly too cold to fight it.
"Thank you," she whispers, lowering her head and gazing at her feet.
"No worries, I'm not as cold as ye are. Come on, let's get ye out of this wind."
She looks up at me again, backing up a step, and I think she's about to take off the jacket.
"I meant up there," I say, pointing up the stairs. "There's always less wind at those tables next to Swift Convenience... and there's light there too. I swear, I mean ye no harm."
She smiles, I think; I cannot see her face clearly, but her eyes are gleaming wetly, reflecting the waning light from the scattering of stars among the clouds. She takes a tentative step towards the stone steps and suddenly stops. Gasping, she frantically starts looking around her feet.
"What's wrong?"
"My phone! I dropped it."
I help her search and find it a few steps from where we stand. She must have dropped it during her fruitless attempt at fleeing from me. Its screen flashes on when I pick it up, and I automatically look at it.
"You will pay, Saanvi, you bitch. We know it's you who posted those pics of Tanner and Molly! You're not getting away with making fools of us."
The message, the last in a nasty queue of messages, is from someone called Stephanie, written in abbreviations and message slang, but I get it. I didn't know the angry chick's name until now, but I recognised her from her picture. In the past, I've had some less-than-stellar moments with this girl. What I don't get is why she's angry at the girl still looking for her phone.
Saanvi, is it?
"What pictures is this Stephanie chick on about?"
Saanvi turns at the sound of me voice and, swallowing nervously, she holds her hand out for her phone.
"Did ye paste those humiliating pictures of Molly?" That makes no sense; I know Ahmi said that he traced the IP to the school library and was able to see from the security camera feed (don't ask me how he got it) that it was Melissa and a couple of her crew - I think Stephanie's name was among them - who posted the mean pictures, using a computer there.
Saanvi's name wasn't on that list, and we only targeted the girls on Ahmi's list with the pics we posted in response. Besides, if Saanvi posted those awkward pictures, these girls sending her strings of threats would not be angry about that.
"No!" she gasps, confirming me suspicions.
"Ye sent the other pics, didn't ye? The ones proving them wrong." I hand her phone to her, and she reluctantly nods her head. We had no idea who sent those pics. Ahmi said the IP was bouncing around. The person who posted them was using a VPN, and he'd need more time to trace it, but what would be the point? They were helping, not hurting, so he let it go.
"I hope they're not yer mates because if they were me mates, I'd be trying to walk into the ocean to drown meself too."
"I wasn't trying to..." she sniffs, and turning her back on me, she resumes her trek towards the steps.
I follow her across the beach and up the stairs until we reach the walkway between the Swift Building and the beach. The Swift Building is not extremely impressive or luxurious or anything other than quaint and conveniently located. Sitting high and proud at the entrance to the main beach is what makes it a central point for giving directions or meeting up for outings.
Technically, the rent should be high, as the apartments - only eight of them - all have a class view of the beach and are conveniently close to everything important, but it's not. Ronan's aul fella makes loads of money from his convenience store and rent from the hairdresser and surf shop that shares the ground floor with his store.
He also keeps two apartments - one on each floor - empty to rent out to holidaymakers. He leases the other five apartments at really affordable prices to teachers, hospital workers and members of the police force, scoring himself brownie points with the Briar Cove residents, many of whom loyally support his store despite its inflated prices.
When the first rays of the lights set along the path fall on us, I stop Saanvi with a hand on her shoulder, and she turns to look at me with such apprehension that I almost feel guilty. I'm not even doing anything wrong.
"Let's make those effing geebags back off," I say, holding out me hand and nodding at the phone she's clutching to her chest.
She frowns, but me smile seems to convince her that I'm trying to help her and that I have at least some sense of nobility in me, even if it is just a reflection of me brother's. I'm surprised when she unlocks the phone and hands it to me. Taking it, I find and open the school chat group and click on the icon to activate the camera.
"Come on," I say, grinning at her and then I shake me head and pull the edge of me sweater's sleeve into my hand and use it to wipe her face, getting rid of the tear streaks. "Ah, now yer grand."
I pull her closer to me, holding the camera up to show her that I'm trying to take a picture of us, not devour her. She moves closer, still looking at me suspiciously.
"F#ck me, lass, ye look like I'm gonna eat ye! Try smiling, why doncha? Come on, give us a wee smile then. There ye go!"
She's not smiling; she's giggling, but it has the right effect. I snap the picture, and after looking at it to make sure that we're both in focus, looking happy and carefree in the photograph, I post it with a message: "Checking out the night vibes with friends." To girlify it, I add a smiley face and one of those with the hearts for eyes and send it.
Saanvi takes the phone when I hold it out to her, and her pretty eyes nearly pop out of her head when she sees the message.
"I never use words like those!" she gasps.
"Does it matter? They'll get the message," I point out, making her scoff.
"What message?" she asks, and I am genuinely impressed by the girl's ability to appear extremely polite and derisive at the same time. "That I've suddenly turned into a slut?"
"What?!"
"Come on, Galen, everybody knows what kind of vibes girls check out when they're with you," she says, nervously clutching me jacket around her.
I'm surprised that she knows me name, but I'm too busy being insulted to be pleased about that. She has a point, but I don't have to like that point. I have a much better point in mind, and she's missing it completely. Tan and I are mates, and if she's me friend, she's probably his friend too, and he made his warning about messing with his mates perfectly clear in the message he sent this afternoon!
Saanvi is blinking up at me, and apparently, she has a very busy mind because there are so many different expressions fighting to make use of her face. Still a wee bit offended, I'm about to inform her that she can take her complaints up with me bollox when she suddenly starts to shake and then her laughter rings out cheerfully in the quiet night around us.
"Thank you," she chokes, shyly stifling the laugh. "That is actually perfect."
♫
Hunter
Frankie is not himself tonight, but then again, neither is Ma. All through dinner, she's sighing, barely looking up or even eating, and Frankie doesn't want to stay in his high chair or eat his food.
No, it's not because someone - who'll remain unnamed and unblamed - gave him ice cream before dinner!
He is just being difficult and upset and only settles down a little when Willow takes him into her lap and lets him help himself to her fried potatoes. I can see that she's worried about Ma, who barely seems to register her baby's bad behaviour and just continues sighing, pushing the food around on her plate.
"Ma, what's going on?" I finally ask, not able to take much more of it. Frankie sometimes acts up; he is on his way to being two years old, which goes with the territory (so I'm told), but Ma never acts the way she does tonight. It's like the light left the house. "Ma?!"
She finally looks at me when I gently shake her shoulder and repeat my question.
"Oh, it's nothing, my love," she smiles, touching my cheek. "I miss your dad, and I miss Becks. Everything is wrong when they're not here. I'm really tired. Do you mind if I go upstairs for a bit? I'll come down to grab Frankie for his bath later."
I watch her leave the table and wander out of the kitchen, my concern growing. Glancing at Willow, comforting the fretting boy, I can tell that she's worried too, gazing after Ma with large, troubled eyes.
Ma's right, though; everything feels wrong without my dad and Aunt B at the table. Normally, Dad would ask each of us about our day. "What was your highlight, and what was your low point? What are you grateful for today, and what do you need prayer for or help with?" He's always checking in with us, and when he's not doing that, he's making weird noises with Frankie, encouraging the little guy to eat, or telling those mind-numbingly stupid jokes he loves... and I secretly love too.
What was the last one? A priest, a pastor and a rabbit walk into a clinic to donate blood. "What's your blood type? " the nurse asks the rabbit. "I'm probably a type O," says the rabbit.
I mean, seriously! He tells jokes like that and thinks it's hilarious, and only Little Miss Punctuation catches it right away and laughs with him.
Damn, I miss my dad tonight.
He went to Chief Job's house straight from work and said he was meeting Coach there for updates and to decide how to proceed. Dad is really worried about Tan becoming collateral damage in the whole disgusting mess. Those were his words. I would've just said: "Get into deep shit."
Tan recently got his purple belt in MMA; attacking someone could be seen as attempted murder because if he'd wanted to, he could've killed the bastard. He might have if Ronja hadn't called him off. Tan loses his mind when he sees someone hurting someone or something weaker than themselves, and Ronja is really defenceless. I don't fault Tan for that - I would've lost my mind too - but he could get into serious trouble now.
I think worrying about Tanner can take a huge portion of the blame for the funk Ma is in. I hate seeing her so stressed and sad. Last night and this morning, the look on my dad's face really cut me deeply. I hate that they're taking this so hard.
I guess it opened my eyes.
I also miss Aunt B, just like Willow; she'd gradually changed this week. She started to say funny, cheeky things, and I heard Ma laugh frequently with her around. I also heard Aunt B say: "Stop it, Bee! You're driving me nuts!" many, many times a day since her arrival. The two of them are like genuine sisters, giggling together, teasing each other, and helping each other.
I'm glad Ma has her best friend back in her life. She has scores of other friends, and she enjoys their company, but the entire vibe when she's with Aunt B is different. I've never seen Ma this happy before; I've been discovering cool sides of her personality that must've been dormant for years.
Missy and I clear the table and decide to give Frankie his bath so Ma doesn't have to. Having the two of us to splash and paint with foam cheers the little boy up to some extent. He is, like most babies and toddlers, very sensitive to the moods of the people he loves. I think it is Ma's almost depressed state of mind, combined with Dad's absence, that is getting to him. He might also be missing Aunt B; she often plays with him in the evening, and he is fond of her.
When Frankie starts to get sleepy, Willow and I end our games with him, and while she packs away his toys, I run upstairs to hand Ma her freshly bathed and clothed baby and his bottle so they can settle down for the night. Running down the stairs, I let out a very unmanly shriek when I reach the foyer and almost crash into Sadako, the scary chick that crawls from the TV in The Ring.
"Paisley! What the hell?" I grab her shoulders and she throws her head back to look up into my face, and I almost shriek again when the hair falls away from her face. She's pale, and her make-up is all over the place, runny with tears. Most of her hair has escaped from the braid it was in, and what must have been a pretty style is now just a stringy mess.
"What happened?! Who hurt you?!" I growl, feeling panicked, pulling her tightly against me in a protective embrace.
"You did!" she sobs, shoving me away.
Now I'm lost. I'm the one making her look like this? I don't want to be the person making people I love look like this.
"Asher ruined my date, so I went to see Galen."
"What?!"
She just glares up at me, and there are too many emotions fighting for dominance over the expression on her face to be sure of what she's feeling, aside from being really angry with me for some reason.
"Did Galen do something to you?" I can't believe he would, but she's in a state, so...
"No! I told you! You did! And you're doing it again, jumping to stupid conclusions. The last time you went after Galen like that, he was just broken, scared, and alone. You just assumed that I was so unlovable that he couldn't possibly want me, that he just wanted to get to you, but you were wrong; he really liked me, and he needed me. You hurt him! You hurt me!"
Wait, she's talking about things that happened when she was in the eighth grade! What the hell for?!
"Are you drunk?"
"I don't drink!"
"There's a first time for everything," I grumble, taking her hand and pulling her with me from the foyer to my bedroom. Ma is relaxing upstairs, watching one of her beloved soaps, while Frankie drinks his bottle on the bean bag; I don't want her to hear us and get all upset again. She will not enjoy the state Paisley is in right now.
"What the hell are you talking about, Paise?" I ask, sitting on the edge of my bed with her beside me.
"He needed me, and you just attacked him for kissing me-"
"What?! That's not quite... I didn't... Look, all I saw was him all over you and you saying no..."
I was having a run with Dex that day when we saw Galen and Paisley in the park near Paisley's home. They were cuddling on a blanket, but Galen was clearly in the mood to do more than just cuddle. A couple of months earlier, I'd been Paisley's first boyfriend, and we sure as hell never behaved like that. We barely ever kissed, and even then, it wasn't much to write home about.
I was shocked, and then I saw Paisley try to move away from Galen and... Well, sure, he did not seem threatening or aggressive, but it was all new to me, and it was Galen... and she's right, I jumped to conclusions. Before Dex could stop me, I charged at them, yanked Galen to his feet and punched him.
The guy is a fighter; he'd already been in way too many brawls since the first year he'd been in Briar Cove, and many of those fights were with me. I suppose there was a lot of bad blood between us because of it. He made no secret that he did not like my friendship with Dex, and I couldn't care less.
Dex is my best mate, and that's that. I won't ever give him up.
He didn't try to explain what was happening or defuse my anger; he revelled in it. He always did. Back then, Galen was constantly trying to get his ass kicked for some reason. Often by me. I eventually came to an agreement with Dex not to rise to the bait anymore. It wasn't easy, but that day was a turning point for both of us.
I don't get any of it. Why is he so angry all the time? His dad rejected Dex as much as he rejected him, and the only person really sad about Emmy's dad leaving is Emmy... and perhaps their mom.
I vaguely remember Paisley crying, begging us to stop, shouting at me that I'd got it wrong and I wasn't sure what she meant. I guess I didn't care. She's always been a soft spot for me; I really thought the guy was there on my jogging route with her just to piss me off.
It was only when Dex came between us and Galen accidentally kicked him in the face that we both snapped out of our aggressive rage. I hate that day! I would do anything to take it back, and I have no idea why Paisley is dredging it up now. She knows how I feel about it.
"You jumped to conclusions, and I told you it was not like that, and you just shouted at me to go home and kept on going at Galen," she hisses. "Dex told me it would be better if I left. He said my being there made it hard for you to calm down, so I left, and Galen and I hardly ever spoke to each other after that day."
I rub a hand through my hair. Why are we talking about this now? I want to know what happened between them today, not almost three years ago.
"Sure," I finally shrug. "I overreacted, I know that, but he'd been picking fights with me for months before that. Don't act like I just suddenly flew off the handle because I saw him getting all gropy with you!"
"He wasn't being gropy! He was just..." she swallows, shaking her head. "He picked fights with you because he was hurting and because he felt threatened by you. Dex had been his for his entire life, and then suddenly, you came into their lives, and Dex became yours! Can you imagine how hard that was for him? Dex was the only person he trusted, the only person he knew loved him unconditionally; everybody else threw him away."
"What the hell are you talking about?! Dex is his own person. He doesn't belong to me! Did Galen have a rant-about-Hunter session? Is that why you're all over me like a bloody awful rash?"
Paisley shakes her head, wiping some of the streaks off her face.
"Of course not; I'm just trying to get you to understand where Gan was coming from. He saw Dex drifting away from him, becoming stronger and stronger, growing, flourishing and sprouting flowers-"
"Huh?!" First, Dex was some kind of possession, and now he's a shrub?
"While Gan was becoming increasingly lonely and isolated and scared and then..." She stops, looking into my eyes, her lip quivering, and I finally realise that there's something else upsetting her, something she's finding hard to tell me. "You... you remember what started to happen to Tan somewhere near the middle of your eighth grade and ended near the middle of your ninth grade?"
No, I want to talk about that even less than I want to talk about the fight that broke Dex's nose and Paisley's heart.
"Of course, I remember," I grunt, clenching my teeth. I don't want to remember; none of us wants to remember, least of all Tanner. That was a horrible time!
We all noticed that Tan was changing, withdrawing, and becoming more and more reckless and self-destructive, but he'd always been hard to understand and communicate with about things that hurt him. So, we waited and waited and tolerated him and patched him up when he got hurt and then, just when the mid-year holidays started in our ninth year, the bubble finally burst.
We all wished that we'd busted it by force long ago.
"What the hell does that have to do with anything?!" I'm starting to feel apprehensive and pissed off, especially since Tan is currently going through something a little similar and doesn't need to have his past shoved into his face right now.
"Galen was involved too! It happened to him too!"
"What?!" Shock washes over me in a cold wave, causing my stomach to give a nauseating turn and my brain to flinch. "Galen was... hurt too?"
"Yes, and he was just trying to find some comfort with me, and you beat him up for it! He wasn't trying to do anything. He wouldn't..."
I remember Tan's mental state back then, how he wouldn't let us in. Until today, he's not talking about it, and any mention of it makes him retreat into himself again. Galen went through the same thing? I guess I now get why Tan and Galen are so close. I also suddenly understand at least some of Dex's tendencies to be too lenient with the guy's temper. I think I now know why he was so protective of his brother... still is.
Why didn't he tell me?!
"I didn't know..." I say, shoving my head into my hands and bracing my elbows on my knees. "Why didn't you tell me?"
"I didn't know until now..."
"Shit!" I groan, feeling light-headed now that all my blood is pooled in my feet. "I'm sorry, Paise."
"It's him you need to be sorry for, not me," Paisley grumbles, but I can hear that her anger is leaving her.
"I am. I'm very sorry."
"You should apologise to him, not to me."
"I will..."
"You need to stop hating him," she says, lowering her head on my hunched shoulder. "He also didn't upload that video of... you..."
"I know; Ahmi told me that at the time. I only thought it was him for the first five minutes..." I lift my head and put an arm around Paisley. "I don't hate him. He hates me."
"I don't think he does... not really," she says, nestling into my side. "I guess he used to think that he was going to lose Dex to you because the two of you are like an old married couple."
"What?!" I snort.
"Tan got jealous too, you know. He probably thought he was losing you, but he just really liked Dex too much to hate him. Besides, Dex became part of our clan, but Galen didn't... He and Tan somehow became buddies despite the fact that they used to fight so much. I'm sure Gan knows by now that he could never lose Dex... so the hating can really stop now."
I am extremely confused right now. So many things that used to make sense don't anymore, while others that didn't make sense now do. I need to go for a run or another ice-cold swim. My brain is humming noisily in my ears, ringing with too much strange information.
"I'm sorry... I hurt you; I didn't mean to. I wouldn't have come between you if-"
"I know that," Paisley says, moving away from me so that she can look me in the eye again. "Besides, I'm lying," she sighs miserably. "You did hurt me by causing that rift between Gan and me, but it's not you that destroyed our budding relationship and kept us apart; it's Ash."
Oh, great, her five seconds of making sense is over for the night!
"I always thought Galen didn't come back to me because of you, but it was because of Asher... and me..."
"What did you do?" I frown, chatting with Paisley can often be highly confusing.
"Apparently, we looked at each other... and he saw us..."
"Ah, yeah," I chuckle. "You do have a way of looking at each other... always did. I saw it when you and I were trying our experiment too. Honestly, I was surprised when you took up with Galen; I thought you'd be with Ash..."
"Why would I be-"
"Come on, Paise, we're beyond that now," I say, rolling my eyes when she moves even further away to glare at me.
"It doesn't matter, anyway," she finally concedes, lowering her head. "He's leaving, and he's ruined any chance of me and Galen being together now."
I fall backwards onto my bed, my feet still planted on the carpet and rub my eyes, trying to rid myself of all the bad feelings I'm drowning in.
"He won't leave you, Paise," I assure her. "He cries every time we have to go away on a school trip and leave you behind."
Paisley laughs softly, turning to look down at me. "He doesn't cry-"
"Yeah, he does! Big Mama's boy, that one. Paisley-Mama's boy," I tease.
"I'm not his mother!"
"Try telling him that."
She laughs, shaking her head, and I'm glad she's looking a little better. I guess she needed to get all of that off her chest.
"He won't go," I smile, yanking at the end of her dissolving braid.
"I wish I were as sure of that as you and Galen are," she says miserably.
"So, he and I actually agree on something?"
"You'd be surprised about how many things the two of you agree on... especially when you're both wrong."
It will definitely be a surprise.
"I know Ash won't go because he won't be able to leave you, no matter how noble his reasons for leaving might be." I suck in a deep breath and just blurt out what's been eating at me since last night when I saw how upset my dad was. "I... I know that because I cannot leave either, and my reasons are also friggin' noble."
Paisley turns huge, startled eyes on me, and I slowly sit up again, rubbing my hands over my face. Heaving another big sigh, I get to my feet and walk towards the bedroom door, but I stop before I reach it and turn to look at her again. She is watching me from the edge of my bed, her face alive with questions.
"Ma is in such a state right now worrying about Tan, and so is my dad. Tanner is right here and not in any immediate danger. I'm sure Chief Job will figure things out and protect him; he's done it before. Can you imagine what my parents would be going through if I left them?
"I know I cannot live here with them forever, but I cannot just walk out of their lives like that. Besides, I'd rather die than lose all of you. So, I'm thinking... I don't know what I'm thinking..."
I run a hand through my hair, not wanting to make promises I might not be able to keep. I'm still heavily conflicted about this, but seeing my parents' pain...
"I think I might go do my basic training and then come back and study for a veterinarian at Thunder Ridge Uni, just as I planned. If Doc Winston will still have me, I'll join his practice like we've always talked about. Find my own place..."
"Get married to Willow and have a dozen children," Paisley interrupts, beaming at me while she rises from the bed and walks towards me.
"No!" I state with conviction, my heart stuck in my throat. "Not that. Not ever."
♪♫♪
Note:- Jeandré, thank you for giving me a cool dad joke to use.