"How long have you been doing that?" I question as Layla and I walk down the hallway together. "And please don't lie to me."
I couldn't get anything out of her last night, she spent majority of the night using her laptop but anytime I got up for any reason she would always ask me if I was leaving. Part of me did want to cut my loss and leave, but I didn't want to leave her because she what if she does it again but this time she doesn't resurface.
I know she just needs somebody by her side while dealing with all this, but she needs her father or some type of authority figure more than she needs a friend. And right now, I'm the only one she has and I can't just leave her in this state and pretend at I didn't see her nearly drown herself.
Maybe if I didn't leave to go back to The Bakers house she wouldn't have done that, it's my fault.
"I've only done it twice, I swear." Layla informs. "The second time was last night."
"Layla, you could have—"
"Can we not talk about this here?" Layla whispers, she plasters a smile on her face when she sees Olivia walking towards us. "Morning, Olivia."
"Morning, Sam. Morning, Layla." Olivia greets as she stands on the other side of me, she wraps her arm around mine.
"Morning." I greet back. "Why are you being so formal?"
Layla wrap her arm around my arm and loudly whispers, "She must want something."
"What? So because I greet y'all, like I always do, I just want something now." Olivia states as she nods her head. "Okay, so the next time I'll see either one of you, I'll walk right pass you without speaking."
"Yeah, she definitely want something." Layla says. "And this is my cue to leave before she tries to rope me into her plans, I have a Student Council meeting to attend so I'll see y'all later."
Olivia phone notification chimes, she pulls her phone out. "My mom wants to know what you want to eat for dinner? It's your night to pick."
"Somebody else can take my pick, I have plans tonight after the 7-on-7 game so I won't be coming over tonight." I inform.
"But you coming back to the hotel tonight, right?" Layla questions.
"Yeah, I'll be back a little late but I'm coming back tonight."
"Okay." Layla seems relieved. "I'll see you later."
"Wow." Olivia says as we watch Layla walk away from us. "You guys seem super close."
"I mean, I guess." I shrug. "But let's talk about you now because Layla wasn't wrong when she said that you wanted something."
"Seriously, I don't want anything." Olivia claims.
"It's about Jordan, ain't it?" I question. "You're here to be a mediator."
"Listen, just hear me out." Olivia says as she unwrap her arm from around mine then move to stand in front of me. "He's just going through a lot since—"
"And he's not the only person who's going through a lot."
"Come on, Sam. Just look at it from his perspective, he found out that our dad had cheated on our mom with his girlfriend mom."
"I don't want to look at it from anybody perspective, Olivia!" I exclaim. "Him having some girl hanging on him that close to him and pouring drinks down her throat, has absolutely nothing to do with y'all father. But if we're using our fathers as an excuse then that should mean I have full permission to go be under some guy because of my father, I'll definitely remember that later. Now, excuse me, I have a test later today and I need to do some last minute study so I'll see you later."
I give her a smile before walking around her, but my smile drops instantly once my back is facing towards her and she can no longer see my face. I manage to slip into study hall right as the late bell strike, the room isn't heavily pack so I'm able to find a empty table to sit at.
Pulling out my notebook I turn to the second page, after everything that has happened last night between Darnell, Jordan, and Layla — I have decided to do an old method that my sponsor use to have me do I was fresh out of rehab. It's basically an diary and I write down everything I'm dealing with or how I'm feeling, but being that I couldn't keep up with this method because I found it boring, she had told me to write using songs lyrics but I would have to make them up.
It help writing in the dairy more interesting and fun, and I really had to ponder what I really want to say and how I actually felt, and I plan on doing it again.
"Sam!" My name being yelled has my head snapping towards the direction the voice came to see Spencer basically marching towards me.
"Sh!" I place my finger over my lips as I close my notebook and slide it off my desk and onto my lap. "Why are you screaming my name like that? People are trying to study or do their homework, you could have just walk over here and started talking instead of yelling like that. And why aren't you in class?"
He holds up his hall pass as he says, "I don't care about none of these people and what they are doing." He sits at the edge of my desk. "Listen, so I went over to dad house after you'd left and I found out that Darnell is dad ex-girlfriend son, and he use to live with them back in Nevada and now Darnell is going to be living with him again for a while."
I slap my hands over my cheeks and dramatically say, "What?! You got to be kidding?!"
"How long have you known?"
"Since Nipsey Vigil."
"You've known this whole time who Darnell was?"
"No, I only known that dad was bringing him down here to live with him but I didn't know his name, what he look like or that he was trying to give him Chris position."
"Why didn't you tell me?"
"Because all we've been doing us arguing and it's so tiring being mad at you, so I figure that dad should tell you instead of me." To change the subject I smile and ask, "Are you ready for this 7-on-7 after school?"
Spencer smiles. "Hell yeah. An easy win right after winning the championship. We got this win in the bag, no question ask."
"Period." I chuckle but the laugh is short-lived and I clear my throat. "But I really need to study for my test that I'm taking next period, and you need to get back to class before you get in trouble. I'll see you at lunch."
"Ight, I see you in a few hours." Spencer raise off my desk. "I'll find you after third period because today it's just going to be me and you, I want you to tell what's going on with you and Jordan." I open my mouth to speak but he cuts me off. "I don't want to hear that things between y'all are fine cause I know it's not then once you get everything off your chest, I'll help you and Jordan make amends."
What's with him and a Olivia trying to push me to forgive Jordan? It's feels like they won't allow me to feel the way I feel, like I have to push my feelings aside so I can forgive and forget the second anything happens. "Yeah, okay. I'll see you later." I watch him leave the class then I wait a couple minutes before slipping my notebook back into my notebook then I head out the class.
I already know that Spencer will not let this go, he's going to see it out that Jordan and I make amends. But I don't want to make amends right now, I don't want to talk about Jordan; I just want to be upset until I'm over it. I have no plans on having lunch with Spencer, I don't know how imma get out of this but I have to think of something.
Maybe I can take extra long on the test so that when it's time to go to lunch I can just stay in class and continuing taking my test, but then Spencer would just wait until it's time for the 7-on-7 to try to have us make amends. Or I can fake sick and possibly leave school early, but then I'll miss the game, but technically this isn't a big game and losing it wouldn't really matter.
I just don't like to lose but right now I really don't care whether we win that little game or not, I just don't care and that's making me lean towards leaving school early and missing the 7-on-7.
"Samantha James." A female voice comes from behind me, looking over my shoulder I see that it's Layla friend, Rochelle. "Just the lady I was looking for." Sighing, I turn completely around as she close the distance between us. "I told you that you can't outrun me. I was serious about you being one of the most important part of Beverly Football franchise right now."
"Look, this is really not the time."
"Yeah, I have heard that twice on two different occasions from you and your brother. And now I'm starting to think that it's always not the right now, so it doesn't even matter when I pitch you this idea." Rochelle says. "And being that you're suppose to be in class but you are here wondering the walls, it seems like you have time to talk."
I cross my arms and ask, "I'm listening. What do you want to talk about?"
"You and Jordan."
Of fucking course!
I roll my eyes and start to walk away from her. "And now I'm not listening."
"Seems like you and the boyfriend aren't on good termes at the moment." Rochelle says as she follows me. "Maybe it really isn't the best time to try to pitch this, but when is it ever a good time." She grabs my wrist but I snap my head back she lets me go. "Just hear me out for ten minutes. What's the harm in just hearing what I have to say?"
The bell for third period rings. "I'll hear you out if you give me a ride to Crenshaw."
She digs in her purse and dangles her keys in front of my face with a smile. "Let's go."
Sitting in the passenger seat, I relax back into the seat as I roll the window down so that I can feel the cool air blowing against me. "Why do you want to talk about me and Jordan?"
"Well, it's really about you and Spencer." Rochelle informs. "But after some thought and a bit of research we decided that both of you can help build the school separately. Your way involves your relationship with Jordan, which is quite popular around the school."
"How will my relationship with Jordan help build the school?"
"Like I said your relationship with Jordan is quite popular, every since that kiss with Jordan after y'all won the state championship — you have the most talked about relationships. My dad wants to make you and Jordan a public relationship, it starts with your relationship but it's much bigger than that. By making your relationship a public relationship, it will gain more attention to the school."
"You basically describe a publicity stunt." I point out. "You want to use my relationship to bring attention to football team."
"Look, call it what you want." Rochelle says. "But this will build the Beverly Eagles into the next powerhouse in high school football, and it all begins with one of our franchise star. You. You're going to be the most talk about high school football recruit in the country, with my dad connections you can be on the cover of sports illustrated. Just imagine what that'll do for your football career; you will have every college lined up and ready to give you a football scholarship. The best way to build Beverly's rep is by raising your profile, and by doing that it shows that the Eagles don't just win titles. We know how to put our players on the path of stardom. The future is to run Beverly football team like a division one college program."
"That sounds like a lot of work."
"It is, but we know you can handle it." Rochelle glance over at me and smile. "There'll be press, off-season exhibitions. Like I said this starts off with your relationship with Jordan, but it's much bigger than that."
"Sounds like you want to capitalize off my relationship."
She doesn't deny this accusation. "This will benefit everybody involved, not just my dad. Jordan, the school, the team, and you will all benefit from this. You are the one who will be gaining the most out of this, so truly, you're holding your own career into your hands and how far you take it."
I debated back and forth before asking, "If I agree to do this then what will I have to do?"
"You basically have to become your own brand. Which means building a reputation on the things you want to be known for, and then allowing yourself to be known for them. Luckily for you, being a female football player trying to make into the NFL is what you are known for. You might be thinking that you've been doing that but you actually haven't, it's more to it then that — it's also about rebranding yourself to appeal to your targeted audience and social media is perfect for that. Once you find your target audience, you have start posting more on social media."
"I'm not really into the social media thing." I admit. "The last thing I posted had to be from two years ago, I did gain some more followers since winning the state championship."
"And you will gain a lot more with my help." She claims. "If you let me help you, all you have to do is give me access to your account and send me pictures, and I can handle the social media part. The only thing you will have to do is enjoy your relationship with your boyfriend, the good and the bad, and send me pictures so that I can post them onto your account." She puts her car in park when she pulls up in front of Crenshaw High. "There's obviously more to it than that, but we discuss that later when you tell me whether you are in or out."
"I think I pass." I take my seatbelt off. "But thanks for the ride."
"Just sleeps on it." She unlocks the car door, I start to get out the car but her voice stops me when she says, "I'm assuming that you are not planning to participate in the 7-on-7, don't worry I'll tell your coach that something came up and to find a replacement for the game."
"Thanks."
Getting out the car I walk around the building until I get to the football field, walking onto the middle of the field I drop my bag. Closing my eyes I remember the very last game that I played on this field, I had scored the winning point for the game that night, the happiness of winning the game was short-lived when somebody had gotten shot dead.
And that same night Billy had recruited Spencer and me, it's crazy how long ago that was and how much has happened since then. I use to hate going to Beverly, hated feeling like I didn't belong, hated when Coach switch my position, and I hated it even more when we had to move in with him just to play football.
It's definitely a different life then Crenshaw and it took some time to get use to it, but the people aren't that bad once I actually got to know them. There's a lone football on the field and I walk over to pick it up, I miss playing on this field with all my old teammates; getting into position I take two steps back and throw the ball as far as I could.
The excitement I felt picking up the ball instantly goes away when my hand let go of the ball and I don't know why, usually I stay pump whenever my feet touch the field but today for some reason, I'm not pump at all. I have the same feelings I did in study hall, about not caring about missing a 7-on-7, even though it's a small game and it really doesn't matter.
I'm usually happy to play in any game especially since I've been benching it basically half my football career. It's probably just me still being mad at Jordan, I watch as the ball fly high in the air and over to the other side of the field.
Starting to walk over to the other side of the field to get the ball when it falls, I stop when I see somebody sprinting down the field — the jump up and catch the ball. When the person feet touch the ground again they turn around and I see that it's Darnell, he starts to walk towards me and I meet him half way.
"That was a nice catch." I compliment when I'm close enough for him to hear. "You got some speed on you."
"And you got an arm on you." Darnell says as we come to a stop in front of each other, he tucks the ball under his arm. "That throw has some serious spin on it."
"Thanks." I'm trying to be nice but the fact that he's on the verge of replacing Chris or the bitter realization that this stranger was enough for my dad to stay around to raise, but not his own biological kids, doesn't sit right with me.
"You know being that it's still school hours, technically you're trespassing, right?" Darnell questions.
"And you know being that it's still school hours but you're out here with me means you're skipping class, right?" I counter.
"I won't tell if you don't."
"Deal."
He extend his hand out towards me. "We haven't officially met due to all the tension back at the Slauson Cafe, but I'm—"
"Darnell Hayes. I know." I put my hand in his. "I'm—"
"Samantha James." He says. "I know."
"I mean, Cameron did already introduce us."
He chuckles and shakes his head. "Nah, I knew who you were before Cameron introduce us the other day."
"How?"
"I first found out about who you were when I found a baby picture of you in his wallet, you had on a burgundy graphic shirt, red sweatpants, and white sneakers. He talked about you a lot and kept tabs on you, he would always be so happy with every achievement that you had accomplished." He informs. "The other day when you came to practice and I pointed at you, I was telling your dad that you were here and I wanted to meet you but he told me that it wasn't the time."
I'm pretty sure the reason it wasn't the time because I knew who he was already but dad had not told Spencer about Darnell yet, but knowing that I still asked, "Why did he tell you it wasn't it the time?"
He looks away from me and rubs his neck. "Yeah, you weren't with Spencer when he came over last night. Uh, well, I'm more than just the new recruit I'm actually—"
"My dad ex-girlfriend son." I finish his sentence, he snaps his head back towards me. "You use to live with him back in Nevada with your mom, and you're going to be staying with him for a while since your mother is deployed. I know."
"Did Spencer tell you?"
"No, my dad told me a couple days before you came down here. I knew who you were just didn't know how you looked."
"Seems like you took the news better than Spencer did. Well, he did say that you were the more understanding twin."
"Spencer's understanding, too." I inform, oddly aware that are hands are together I let go of his hand and cross my arms. "He just has to get out his own head and realize that this isn't about him, until then he'll probably be a little hostile towards you."
"A little?"
"Okay, a lot. But he'll come around. Eventually. He just takes a while to adjust to change."
"Well, it's a good thing that you're not hostile towards me. That would have been a shame if you were." Darnell says as he smiles. "But why are here?"
"I was skipping class as well."
"Trespassing and skipping school." He shakes his head. "You just out here being a menace to society, huh?"
I decided to use what Jordan said to me the other night. "I'm just having some fun and doing me. I'm enjoying being a state championship winner."
"Okay, I see you throwing around that title." He claps his hands. "Congrats on the win, but with me on the team now, y'all gonna have to come a lot harder to win."
"Oh, you think you're that good, huh?"
"I do, actually." He backs away from me as he throws the ball in the air. "How about you see how good I am?" My phone vibrates in my back pocket and I take it out to see that it's Spencer calling me, probably wondering why I'm not in third block. "What do you say?"
"You're on." I back away from him, stopping by my bag I turn my phone off then tuck my phone away inside. "Hope you ready to get your ego and pride crush by a girl."
"If it's by you then I'm always ready."