"Is she picking?"
"Huh?" I take the phone away from my ear and turn to Victoria. She's about repeating herself when I stop her. "Oh no, no. Keeps going to voicemail."
"And she told you to wait for her?"
"Yeah. I mean, no." I sigh, cutting the call as it again starts telling me this is Pamela no-middle-name Williams, if you really really really need me, leave a message. "It's just that she never... She never goes for the after-party. Although, this time she claimed she wanted to go but.. I just thought, you know, if she went she'd let me know first."
"I'm guessing you don't have a ride home,"
"That, and I don't want to leave her here."
"If she's here."
"Yeah, If she's here." I spot slight frustration in Victoria's ebony face, I'd say she rolled her eyes too but she's wearing glasses, plus it's night so I can't be certain.
I know I'm acting paranoid and since so far she doesn't seem to be Pamela's biggest fan, I might as well come off as annoying to her, however I can't stop it. I can't stop calling no matter how many times it goes to voicemail. I need a ride home and I need to know how Pamela is. This is not some sort of creepy movie but my brain keeps picturing the worst scenarios. And I'm starting to believe them.
Hi, this is Pamela Williams, if you really really really-
"Voicemail again?"
"Uh huh." I answer, not looking at her, instead at my phone screen. The caller profile is a picture of Pamela and I from last summer. Smiling.
"Look, I get it that you wanna find her but the stadium's getting empty. Those bleachers are empty. It's getting darker too so we gotta go. Have you got a substitute ride or something?"
I check my phone again for any calls, anything but of course. "You're right. We should go. And yeah, I do have a.. I have someone I can call."
She nods, going off to stand beside the wall she was leaning on before she got in my face to gently knock sense into me 'cause she's right. The only people here besides us are the people to clean up the place and who knows how safe that is for us.
"I'm sorry for keeping you."
"I chose to stay." She says, shooting down the sentiment. I'm now a bit used to her coldness, enough to know she's not being cold. Just not the type to deal with too much emotion.
"Do you have a ride home?"
"Sure. I'm getting a Uber once your ride arrives."
"A Uber? Doesn't make any sense, you could just come with us."
She eyes me like I'm insane, "We live on completely opposite sides."
"Yeah, but my driver could drop you off at your place after. The way he does whenever you come over." I press.
Her eyes lower to the arms she has folded across her chest, seeming to ponder on it. "That's different."
"Still. If you come with us we'll be saving the ozone layers from being destroyed by pollution from two different vehicles. Saving the environment."
There's a long pause before she speaks.
"That makes absolutely no sense, Melissa."
I giggle, and I catch her smiling as well. That was kind of the point. I've always known i'm not funny but my sister says my jokes are the type you smile and shake your head to after realizing how senseless they are.
"All cars from Martinez works are environment friendly. Think that was kind of my point."
"Melissa,"
My smile falters, Vicky also looks off to the side and we're both met with Nathan. He's in a plain white t-shirt on loose shorts and his hair is wet. Eyes wide as saucers.
"What the bloody hell are you doing here?"
"Um.. you too." I respond, taking a step back and pointing at him. I actually pointed. Well, him sounding like a cop had me a little on defense.
When he's close enough, he places a hand on my back and begins ushering me out of the stadium, "Christ, Melissa, you shouldn't be here. It's almost ten pm and the place is empty... Hey?"
Him not moving anymore makes me stop, I see his hey? Is meant for Victoria. It's not that she stayed back while he ushered me out, but with the big distance between us, it's obvious she'd been lagging behind. Or walking like a normal human being, the only reason I've walked this far is 'cause Nathan's actually pushing me.
Nathan and I both stop to let her catch up, though her lips in a tight line shows our kind act of waiting is probably getting on her nerves instead.
If Nathan knows, he doesn't care. "Are you with her?"
"Yes!" I answer before she can, they both turn their gaze to me. "I'm calling a driver to come pick us up."
"No, I can't be waiting for that. I'm dropping you both at home."
Victoria's eyes grow a size. I wave it off so she chills.
"You're such a dad sometimes." I tell him.
His hand returns to my back, and we return to him gently shoving me out of the stadium.
We make it to the quiet parking lot where not too many cars are anymore. It's almost just his maroon truck. We really ought to have gotten out of here sooner.
When Nathan gets into the car, the lights of course come on and I see him clearing the seats, trying to make them empty enough for all of us to sit our derrière.
Did I just say derrière?
While Victoria looks pissed.
"I told you I was ordering a Uber." She bites besides me.
"Are you two getting in or what?"
I mouth a sorry to her. But I don't think she'll ever forgive me because I'm also slipping into the backseat making it obvious she's the one to seat upfront with him. And it wasn't even planned.
The car goes quiet as we settle in, save for the small ruffling noises coming from Nathan doing all the things to set the car in motion. The bright orange light reduces as he slowly starts backing out of the parking lot.
"Congrats on the win." I tell him when he twists in his seat to reverse.
He glances once at me, "Thanks." There's a hint of a mischievous smile like he's got something more exciting him, but looking Victoria's way, he doesn't say more.
After the whole reverse thing and we're on the road, he looks her way again. Seeming to just say it anyway, he adds, "Coach Tanner says Georgia University scouts have their eyes on me."
"Wow, that's great!"
"I know."
"You deserve it." Victoria softly butts in. She and Nathan make eye contact and for a second, I feel like I'm third-wheeling. I'm third-wheeling.
"Okay..." I drawl out. She's the first to look away from him to the window, resembling a child who just got caught stealing candy. Nathan looks confused. But he eventually goes back to watching the road ahead. "Georgia's what you wanted right?"
"Second choice."
"Oh, what was your first?"
"Ohio. They've got their eyes on Tyler."
Victoria snorts, still looking out the window. "Isn't he from the NFL?"
"They're hoping he'll consider them."
"Our school actually changing captains just to accommodate him in the first place, is way beyond me."
Nathan stares at her side profile, looking way too comforted by her comment. So eyes wide and all as I situate myself on the console between their two seats, I attempt to salvage the situation because Nathan shouldn't hate Tyler. Not now that Tyler seems to like me. "Uh, yeah, but Nate and Tyler are cool now and getting along fine."
Victoria turns to look at me. Just that. I send a smile her way before she returns to the outdoor gazing.
A phone ringing cuts through our uncomfortable silence and Nathan switches to driving with one hand in order to pick the call.
"Hello." A pause. "I'm heading home. Oh, okay.. now?— Okay. Okay."
Victoria and I share a look.
"What happened?" I figure it's best to ask.
"Nothing. I just gotta rush in dropping you guys home. Uh..." he turns to her side. "Where do you stay?"
"Northern Ville."
"Shit."
Mierda de hecho. Victoria and I share another look but this time, if looks could kill I'd be six feet under.
"I don't know how I'm gonna do it."
"No, I wouldn't want to inconvenience you. I'll get a Uber or a taxi." Every word coming out of her mouth sounds so clipped and sharp it could cut ice. And low key seems more directed at me than him.
Nathan doesn't notice it. As usual. In a hopeful boyish tone he asks, "You sure?"
"No, no, just drop us off at my house. There'll be a driver to get her home."
"I'd rather go straight home, Melissa, don't bother." Words like ice.
"I insist." I plead. When our eyes meet on the side mirror, she looks away.
"O..kay." Nathan drawls out. While I position myself fully behind his seat to block myself from his view. Only being visible to the side mirror Victoria's looking at me through. I mouth a bigger and more genuine apology.
When he drops us off, we both wait for him to speed away before going into the house. I ruffle my brother's hair as we step through the gate. He of course shoves my hand away then locks the gate.
"Why haven't you slept?"
"It's Friday! Soledad says I can stay up till eleven on Fridays." His words are rushed and he appears to be on the verge of tears for something so meager. I guess bedtime extension means a lot to ten year olds.
"Well, it's almost eleven so maybe go brush your teeth."
He grumbles as he walks past, leaving just us outside. The security lights are on so it's not dark, and the water fountain's always rushing so it's not quiet either.
But there's still a tense silence between us that I know I should just break. We haven't spoken since the we got out of Nathan's car. "I know you want to kill me."
"That's a relatively soft way to put it."
Despite the situation I laugh, "I'm so sorry. I can swear that I really thought I was helping and I was. Things just blew out of proportion."
Instead of answering, she walks ahead of me to the house, even starts ascending the small line of steps to get in.
"Well, do come in." I say sarcastically, my voice low.
However it's not too low because she hears. "It's the least you could offer."
I giggle, and race to meet up.
Once we're in my room, I turn the lights on. Then cringe from the brightness. The night is warm so I switch the heater for the air-conditioner. At least I think the night is warm.
"Are you cold?"
She shakes her head, no, her mind seeming to be far away. I leave the room to my sister's, stopping by the open door.
Soledad's thankfully home and on her bed, phone in hand like she was texting before I interrupted.
"Hi,"
She grunts a sound that appears to be, "yeah?"
"I need your help."
"Dios. You didn't get into trouble, did you? Didn't the game go well?"
"Actually, between you and I, the one more likely to get in trouble is you—"
"Fair enough."
"—And the game went well. I just need your help for Victoria."
After waiting a while, she blinks twice. "Okay, are you going to explain? Or do I have to figure out what or who Victoria is,"
"Oh, she's my project partner, you've met her before."
She blows out a gallon of breath that effectively lifts the loose dark curls hanging around her face. "Anica, I swear to God that if you don't get to the point."
"Okay, Okay. She came home with me."
"Alright? Sleepover or what?"
"No, not that. She needs a ride home. I kinda need you to call a driver, I know you have all their contacts. I tried the only one I have but it's not going."
She stares at me for a minute, thinking. Then scrolls through her phone, pressing it to her ear as a number dials. "You can go. I'm calling— where does she live?"
"Up the hills. Think Northern Ville."
"Northern Ville? Why she come here then, this late? It's almost opposite sides."
"Circumstances."
As the driver on the line picks, she forgets about me and starts discussing with him in our native language. I take it as my cue to leave.
"He'll be here soon." I assure Victoria once I get back to the room. She's standing by my work table, looking at a picture. It's when she places it down that I see it's a smaller version of my family picture. With that one missing family member, but I've noticed she's not the type to pry too much. And that factor about her is much appreciated.
"That's good. I need to get home as soon as possible."
"Why? Are you cold?" I ask, seeing as the navy blue hoodie I'd borrowed her back during the game when it was cold, is now wrapped round her body.
"My grandpa would be worried sick. I kinda promised to be home by ten and that's an hour ago."
"Oh." My mind lingers over the fact that it's not her parents being worried sick, but I decide to instead offer obvious help. "You could call him, though. Let him know you're alright."
She stares at me like I indeed am saying the obvious. "He's phone's bad, Melissa. If it was an open option I would've taken it. An hour ago."
"Oh. Sorry. Makes sense."
We settle into the silence. While it's a comfortable one, I know a lot of thoughts are running through our minds. My thoughts a little more on the shallow side, anyway.
"Don't take this the wrong way," I blurt. "But when we were with Nate... If you weren't ebony you'd have turned red, wouldn't you?"
All I get in response is a pause. A very long pause. Then,
"Excuse me?!"
"I'm just saying."
"I would- I was not blushing."
"Okay."
"At all." Her voice remains an octave higher, the most dramatic and bothered I've ever witnessed her be.
"Alright."
She huffs out a huge breath, flopping to the couch by the bed. "I was not, okay? You're the one who was probably off somewhere with star boy."
"I— you turning this on me shows I'm right. You like Nathan. I'm right, aren't I?"
"I know not what you're talking about, Melissa Martinez and I'll appreciate if you stop."
I choke on a laugh. "Know not? Is this a Shakespearean class?"
"Look," She turns to me squarely, seeming between angry and scared. "You need to promise me you won't tell anyone. We don't want false rumors moving around."
"It's not false but I promise."
She covers her face with her palms before re-addressing me. "You need to promise."
"Fine, Fine. You have nothing to worry about. I promise."
I get a long warning look from her, a look that appears she's making sure I'm telling the truth. When she's satisfied, "Alright.... 'Ight good, now please go find out when the driver gets here."
" 'Ight." I mimic her with a sneaky grin.
She groans, "You promised."
"I did, I did."
"You don't.. you don't think he noticed, do you?"
I ponder on it for a while. Well, pretend to, I've got no doubt in my heart that he didn't notice. Boys can be very oblivious to these kind of things and tonight, Nathan didn't give me any reason to think otherwise.
"I don't think he did. At all." She visibly deflates in relief.
My pause must be too long for her 'cause when she notices I'm staring she makes a face at me, "What are you waiting for?"
I go ahead to the door, however I'm bending to pick a loose crayon on the carpet before actually getting there.
The first face I see on swinging open the door, is Pamela's. Then right behind her is my brother. I want to ask him why he still hasn't slept but Pamela seems to be the one I should address first.
"Pamela," I gasp. "Where did you go off to? I was waiting and called like crazy, pretty sure you'll see a gazillion missed calls if you check your phone. Or at least a thousand."
Through out my little talk, I realize she's not half as emotional as I am. As a matter of fact, her face remains as solid as it'd been when I first saw her.
I've been the only one talking. "Are you... good? Did something happen."
"Something did, actually."
She brushes past me into the bedroom. Her lips forming an ill smile when she spots Victoria. "I should've known." She turns to me, mouth slightly open as she tongues the inside of her cheek. "Didn't you claim you wanted to sleep. Or did I just not hear the part of a sleepover?"
"No, no, it's not a sleepover, she came over because..." I think of everything I have to explain and it's a long story just thinking about it. "Circumstances."
"I don't care, to be honest. It's clear you've got a lot of things you're hiding and lying about."
"What?"
"What's this?" She questions, tilting her phone screen to my face but I'm not looking. Rather I'm staring bewildered at her face, and how she already seems to have an answer for whatever's on her phone.
But then I freeze.
The phone screen is lighted up with a flashed picture of Tyler and I. Of Tyler when he kissed my forehead just a few hours ago.
I raise my eyes to meet hers and she cocks a brow. "Circumstances?"
"Pamela. I can.. I can—"
"Explain?"
"Pamela,"
"Yeah, I'd love to hear an explanation 'cause do you know what I looked like when that picture got out? A fool. That's what I looked like. So explain."
I swallow. I can't believe this is happening. I mean, I knew it would.
I knew it would. I knew it would. I knew it would.
She quits the passive-aggressive disposition, letting the real hurt beneath show. I see our friendship flash before my eyes. "I can't believe you'd do this to me. I— keeping something so.. big.What for? Or.. what am I? Some big black bear ready to snatch your bae?!"
"No!"
"Why didn't you tell me? I'm confused. When did it.. since when did you guys get so close? Because this doesn't look like it just started." She adds the last part, however the way her eyes search mine reveals she's unsure. Or maybe she's just hoping she's wrong. And for a minute I contemplate lying. To salvage the situation, bury it back again underneath the rug. Tell her a cooked up story consisting of me merely congratulating him for the win and he stumbled on a giant rock and I tried to help him so we ended up in a compromising position of his lips on my forehead.
Not a very good lie but If given more time, I could make it better. Maybe. Probably not.
"We met on this street." I glance at Victoria who's still in the room. With an uncomfortable expression, she looks away. "He lives around. I was taking those morning walks I'd told you about."
"And when was that?"
"In August."
"August— August? Melissa, August. That's almost two months ago!"
"I know, I know, and I was going to tell you, I swear—"
"You're such a hypocrite, aren't you? Having the nerve to confront me the other day about hiding something from you yet here you were with- do you know I didn't tell you about it because I knew you'd be sad. And I didn't want a burden for you to carry. A secret you didn't need to keep because I knew you wouldn't blab about it anyway, you don't act that way, you're good at keeping secrets. Apparently, very good."
"Pamela,"
"I didn't want to disturb you and that's why I kept it to myself. I never even told Amy, she found out on her own. If I could avoid telling I would've, knowing it'd be nothing but a burden on whoever I tell it to. But you and Tyler. You kept it a secret because you can."
"No. Pamela, no please just wait."
"Wait for what? For you to figure out a better lie?"
"Williams you don't gotta be so bothered. Hear her out first." Victoria says and I nearly scream 'cause that's the last thing Pamela needs to hear. Not helping, Victoria. Not in any way helping. Though I do wish I could be heard out and understood. Even if I'm yet to understand, myself.
"Excuse me?" Pamela turns to her, she just rolls her eyes, looking the other way. This is bad. This is so bad, it's getting worse by the minute.
"I was going to tell you—"
"When? When you're having the one year anniversary?"
"We're not— no." We're not dating. But how do I explain that? "I really was going to tell you, I just kept on remembering that pact we had on the day he came. The one where we promised we would stay away from him." Cringe. It sounds so weird now that I'm saying it out loud. "I.. I didn't want it to come between us."
"Bullshit. Using the pact as an excuse is such bullshit. You weren't going to respect it either way."
My hands tangle in my hair on their own accord. Pull on the strands as I breath out through my mouth because it's over. I've lost my best friend, I know it. I know it, I know it, I know it. I've never seen Pamela this angry. So angry that she appears not to be.
"Pamela, I'll be honest that I never really planned on a day to let you know—"
"Finally, some honesty."
"—but it's only because I was scared as hell. Scared of how you'd take it. I didn't want you to think... I didn't.." Any further words on my tongue die off when I look at her. She looks ready to go. And letting go has never been this hard.
"There's nothing I say. I know there's nothing I say that'll make you believe me."
She offers a tight smile. "I'm glad you understand. Goodnight, Melissa."