~A
TW: Mention of eating disorders.
"You feel so good, petal." He whispered into the shell of my ear, his fingertips digging into the underside of my thighs enough to bruise them. Each deep thrust of his hips pushed me harder against the wall, my back rubbing against the cold material. But it only added to my pleasure, the severe contrast of the chill on my back to the warmth in my chest from his body, even if our clothes separated us.
"Niall." I moaned his name, partly because I could feel the pressure in my stomach building more and more, partly because I knew he just loved hearing it. I tugged on his hair, the back of my head pressing against the wall as he sucked on the skin under my earlobe. One of his hands left my thigh, sneaking under my shirt and hitching it up enough for him to cup my breast, nudging the piercing at my nipple with his thumb.
"What do you need Alexandria?" His face emerged from my neck, his eyes half closed by pleasure as he kept up his hard, steady pace. Without thinking about it much, I grabbed his jaw and pulled him closer. He didn't retaliate, catching on instantly and pressing his mouth on mine. I moaned again, parting my lips and letting him take over the kiss as I held onto him, my whole body alive with pleasure the more I neared the edge. We had gotten carried away, gone from the dressing room for too long. I knew I'd have to come up with an excuse, but all I could do at that moment was think about him and how good he was making me feel. His tongue explored my mouth, colliding with mine as he drove into me again and again, his tip brushing against my g-spot and making me shudder. I tried taking him in deeper, locking my ankles behind his back.
"You gonna cum?" He muttered against my mouth, trying to not break the kiss. I moaned as a response, my mind so distracted I couldn't even kiss him back properly.
"Faster." I whispered to him, feeling myself close to tipping over the edge. He groaned, breaking the kiss to drop his head into the crook of my neck. He reinforced his hold under me, using both his hands again as he pulled out almost all the way before slamming back in, curving upwards to aim for that one spot he knew would make me give in. He moved quicker, his sloppy thrusts a giveaway that he wouldn't be able to last for much longer either.
"Cum all over me baby. And I'll fill you up right after, yeah?" My stomach instantly tightened at his dirty words accompanied with that name, and I could feel myself clenching down on him the faster he moved. I bit down on my lip harshly in an effort to not make too much noise, knowing that anyone could be walking past the tiny storage closet at any moment. His teeth grazed my skin, nibbling on it perfectly as he thrusted deeper, managing to stimulate me enough for my body to finally give in. I clawed at the back of his neck, pinching my eyes shut and pressing my mouth against his shoulder as my body shook. I heard a muffled moan from him, his hips still moving as I hit my orgasm, helping me ride it out while he neared his own.
I was still clutching onto him, my eyes closed and my whole body quivering as he moaned deeply into my neck, the sound reverberating from his chest before it released against my skin. If I hadn't already hit my orgasm, I would've definitely done so by hearing him release such an erotic sound. He slowed the rhythm of his hips down as he thrusted a few more times. I could feel him twitching inside me, his warm release coating my pulsating walls as he panted. With I own breathing still irregular, I didn't attempt to speak. I opened my eyes, holding on to him as I pressed my head back against the cool wall. I could feel sweat trickling down the side of my forehead, my entire body suddenly going cold after it had been on fire.
"Fucking love it when you let me cum inside you." His face emerged from being hidden into my neck, flustered and glistening with sweat as he lazily smiled. The gruffness in his tone was a lot more prominent after he had reached an orgasm. I couldn't get enough of how deep his voice sounded at those moments. I smiled back, taking in a deep breath in hopes that it would help with the lack of oxygen in my lungs.
"I'm gonna place you back down now, okay?" I hummed in agreement and nodded, realising that he had been holding my entire body up for almost ten minutes. I suddenly felt embarrassed over that, but I didn't have time to dwell on it when he slowly pulled out, the sudden lack of pressure he was creating in my body making me wince.
I unravelled my arms and legs from around him, stepping onto solid ground and stumbling a bit as I did so. My legs were shaking from being so tense for so long. I steadied myself, leaning against the wall for a second as he pulled his boxers and jeans back on. He leaned down and grabbed my jean shorts from the dusty floor, holding them out for me. I quickly thanked him, awkwardly readjusting my underwear that had been pushed to the side earlier before pulling my shorts back on, trying not to get them tangled with my sneakers that I was still wearing. Clearing my throat, I took my hair out of its ponytail to redo it and tame it a bit as he watched me, taking a step back into the confined room.
"Everything alright?" I looked up at him as I did the button on the shorts, finding his brows creased together as he gave me a once over with his eyes.
"Yeah, why?" I shrugged my shoulders at him, readjusting my shirt to make sure it was sitting how it was supposed to. His hand gripped the doorknob, but he made no attempt to turn it.
"You haven't talked much, that's all." His observation caught me by surprise. Have I not?
"I'm just tired from the flight." I chuckled, dismissing him with a wave of my hand. I wasn't lying entirely. I was starting to feel jet lagged from frying to America yesterday for the start of the tour, but I wasn't telling him the whole truth either. I have been a bit distracted lately, overthinking situations and worrying because of that.
I had grown used to him. I had gotten acclimated to the fact that he was always around when I was working, always available to meet up with me even for a few stolen moments. I had gotten comfortable, too comfortable around him, and that fucking petrified me. I didn't want history to repeat itself. I didn't want to have to deal with him disappearing from my life in a blink of an eye, so fast that I wouldn't even realise it had happened until days after. I didn't want to go through what I had to go through with Evelyn again, when I let myself get comfortable only for her to leave me once her fiancé returned. The wise thing for me to do would be to distance myself from him, to put up some boundaries and take some space. But how could I do that when I saw him every day? When he'd take every opportunity he could get to steal me away, even if it was for a few minutes? I knew that even if I tried, we'd end up right back to where we were right now.
"Have you eaten anything today?" Niall's question pulled me out of my thoughts, making me look up at him.
"Yes." I lied. I had woken up too late for breakfast and came straight to the venue for rehearsals. I was planning to eat before the show, but considering how much time I had spent here with him instead of the dressing room, I doubted I'd get the time to do that while also getting ready. My body was trembling, but for a whole other reason this time around. I willed myself to hold eye contact with him, facing the concern he was trying to mask with his usual indifference. I cleared my throat and forced a small smile on my face, walking the short distance towards the exit.
"We should get back. We've both been gone for too long." I pushed his hand off the doorknob, trying to ignore his gaze that was glued to me. He didn't say anything as I creaked the door open, sneaking my head out to check for any people around. There were some stage staff members down the corridor, but they weren't paying any attention towards that side of it.
"I'll go back first." I quickly told Niall before opening the door enough to slip out. I didn't wait for a response, checking around me as I made my way towards the dressing room to start getting ready for the show. I would definitely need to shower, which wasn't ideal for me since I hated the flimsy showers in dressing rooms. Everyone was there like I expected. The band were hanging around on the couches with the TV on. My stylists and makeup artist were setting their stuff up while Louis and Calum were doing their own jobs, talking to people that worked in the venue. I ignored them all, making my way to the vanity to get a change of clothes and some toiletries from my bag. Once I had everything I needed, I headed to the bathroom. At the door to it, I ran into Julia who was coming out.
"There you are! Where did you run off to?" She chuckled, leaving the door open for me to pass through. Thinking quickly, I said the first thing that came to mind.
"Long phone call with my brother." I shrugged, seeing her nod in understanding before I closed the door behind me.
Louis, Calum and the random staff members were thankfully gone when I came out, providing for more space in the room and some much needed peace. Rubbing a towel through the ends of my hair that was soaking my shirt with water, I went to my phone to check the time. I still had about an hour to get ready, which definitely relieved me a bit. I resisted the urge to look around the room for Niall, knowing that my body would react if he was there or not. It shouldn't react. I shouldn't feel happy or disappointed about his whereabouts. So I turned my back and walked to the vanity, where my hairstylist was already waiting with a blow dryer plugged in.
"Hi." Maddie chirped, the bangles on her arms clanking together as she arranged some hair brushes and combs around. I took a seat in the chair, folding my leg under me to get comfortable while I let the other dangle off.
"Hey. What are we doing today?" I smiled at her through the reflection of the mirror, letting her run her fingers through my damp hair.
"Nothing much, just a bit of a natural wave." She smiled back before getting a brush, starting to get the knots out before switching to a round brush, blow drying my hair almost straight. I kept myself busy by scrolling through my phone while she worked, nodding mindlessly at her once she told me she had to get her hair curler from her bag.
My attention was pulled from my phone when I saw an item being dropped in front of me onto the vanity, the sudden appearance of it in my vision catching me off guard. I looked at it in confusion, realising it was two things. One was a ripe banana, the other some sort of packaged chicken salad.
"This is all I could find. The catering's terrible." I looked up to find Niall leaning against the vanity, clear annoyance on his face.
"You got these for me?" I couldn't hide the surprise in my tone, raising my brows. He shrugged, one hand on his hip as he leaned onto the other on the table.
"You have a set to get through. I don't want you fainting on me up there because you couldn't be arsed to go get some food." He grumbled, jaw slightly clenched. I couldn't tell if he was annoyed at me or the catering for not providing any more options, but I didn't question him. Reluctantly, I reached for the plastic box containing the salad, a flimsy plastic fork taped at the top, next to the label with the nutritional facts. Half of it was peeled off, the bottom right corner carelessly ripped from the rest. I knew this is where the calorie count would be. I looked back up at him, trying to figure out if he had done it or if he found it like that. I decided to just ask.
"Did you peel off the calories?" I tilted the package enough for him to be able to see half of the label was missing. He didn't even glance down as he nodded his head with a low hum, confirming that he did so.
"Why?" He shrugged on shoulder, taking his hand off of the vanity to cross his arms over his chest, his stance grounded and steady as he kept his legs parted as far as his shoulders.
"You used to have an ED, right?" My mouth parted as my jaw almost dropped. Maddie came back, greeting Niall before plugging the hot tool into a socket, setting it on the table. He greeted her back with a polite smile before looking down at me again, the smile dropping almost as quickly as it appeared. I picked on the edge of the plastic lid with my nail, setting the box on my lap.
"How do you know that?" He scoffed at my question, running his tongue along his bottom row of teeth as he glanced around the room. His gaze fell on me again, his eyes crinkling slightly as he smiled genuinely this time.
"Like it's hard to guess. Half your songs have some mention to it." I wanted to roll my eyes at him and dismiss him in an arrogant way. I couldn't do that though. Not after he had done something so considerate for me by getting me food and making sure I didn't see the calories of it. I had gone past that. I would no longer dwell on calories or count them or even consider them. I did all that once long ago. Now, I ignored them completely. But it was still a gesture that had me smiling to myself that he made sure I didn't see.
"Thank you." I felt nervous looking up into his eyes. Pressing his lips on a thin line, he nodded and walked away. I watched him through the mirror as he walked towards the rest of the band, picking up his Telecaster and starting to tune it.
"That was nice of him." Maddie commented as she sectioned my hair off, clipping it up to start styling it. Looking at the salad in my lap, I ran a finger along the jagged tear of the paper on the label.
"Yeah." I muttered to myself, not daring to look up at my reflection. I ate the salad while Maddie worked on my hair, my stomach full enough to get me through the show easily. Gina did my makeup right after my hair was done, during which Louis came back. He came over and stood behind Gina for a few silent seconds, tapping his pointer finger onto his chin as he fell into deep thought. I furrowed my brows at him through the reflection, asking him what was up in that way.
"Anything I can help you with?" I chuckled, keeping my eyes pinned on him through the mirror. He narrowed his eyes at me, crossing his arms over his chest.
"No, thanks. Just thinking." He so mysteriously answered, tilting his head to take a better look at me, I glared at him, pulling back from Gina to turn my head around and face him directly.
"Do you mind going to think somewhere else? We're a bit busy." I snapped at him, regretting it instantly. I had no reason to take my irritation out in a form of anger, and especially not at Louis. But I couldn't really control my emotions that well, feeling significantly overwhelmed today. Louis bitterly chuckled, shaking his head.
"Fine, I'll just go see what the band is up to." He smirked, spinning on his heels before walking away. I rolled my eyes, sighing deeply as I let Gina get back to work. Louis made his way towards the band that had started getting ready as well. He gathered them and they all left soon after to get set up on stage, leaving me to change into my outfit.
The full denim look that was chosen for me tonight was definitely eye catching, and the form fitting corset accentuated my chest by pushing it up perfectly. The matching jeans were a very good fit too, being flexible enough for me to move around freely. After putting my matching boots on, I posted a mirror selfie on my stories and quickly wrote how excited I was to start this American tour, even if it wasn't that long. I was just happy to get so much exposure in this country. And even though I was grateful to be opening up for a successful artist who would give me that exposure, I hoped I'd get to come back for my own headlining tour soon.
My heart started beating erratically once I was backstage about to go on. All the tiredness I was feeling just a few minutes ago had vanished, replaced by excitement and an adrenaline rush as I wanted for the music to begin, for the curtain in front of the to be pulled aside and reveal the audience to me. And when the countdown sounded in my ears, I felt like I was floating. I started singing the second the spotlight hit me, the thick black curtain shoved out of the way. The lights blinded me for a second, but I adjusted quickly and stepped forward into the centre of the small platform, placing my mic onto the micstand.
I could hear people screaming, and that only excited me more. I was nervous about my setlist, because the first song wasn't one I was expecting anyone to know. We had decided to save the most popular ones of my songs for the end, so E.V.O.L. was the best opener option we had considering how upbeat and intense it was. I loved singing it live, loved seeing people screaming the chorus back to me. I had Jessie to thank for the inspiration of this song, because he really showed me how two people can get ruined from a relationship, from the illusion of love. I thought the anagram I used for it was clever.
During the second verse of the song, I climbed down the few stairs in front of me and joined the band to the main stage. On my left was Ty with his neon green bass, banging his head to the rhythm. Next to him were Perrie and Jillia, standing in front of their mics while Leigh Anne played the drums behind Ty. On my right was the rest of the band, the side I usually avoided. Julia was at the very back with her keyboard, right next to Duncan. He could technically move around to wherever he wanted, but he usually lingered to the back. I think he liked it better that way. But because of it, the rest of the space was taken up by one person only.
Niall had on a navy button down, the short sleeves tight around his biceps as they flexed with every chord change. I always avoided looking at him for longer than a second, worried that people would notice. So I glanced at him quickly before looking away, making my way towards the edge of the stage closer to the crowd during the second chorus. I had already sang it once, so I hoped it had stuck with them as I turned the mic towards them in hopes of hearing them sing. And when I heard them singing, shouting the words 'L.O.V.E., love is evil.', I smiled widely and cheered into the mic before moving to the bridge.
I walked to the other side of the stage, letting the girls do the backup vocals of the buildup while I caught my breath after almost screaming the last chorus. I saw someone holding out a bi flag, bunched up and up in the air for me to grab. I didn't hesitate taking it, the group of fans around the one that gave it to me going absolutely crazy when I did. I winked at no one in particular, kneeling down and wrapping it around my shoulders for the last chorus. I wanted to show it off, so I took it with me and hung it on my micstand in the middle of the stage.
My set was barely thirty minutes long, so it made me have to be very careful when it came to choosing the setlist. I wanted to sing all of my newer songs that people might have actually heard, while also adding in a few older ones that I always loved performing. I didn't expect people to know who I was, so I wasn't disappointed whenever I'd barely see anyone singing along. But when they did, when I played the last few songs that were actually charting and saw people knowing the words, I felt like I was floating with happiness.
I was amidst performing Primadonna, my arm holding the mic extended towards the crowd. I was in awe over the fact that more than half the stadium knew the words, shouting the chorus at the top of their lungs and almost drowning out the already quiet music. I was overwhelmed, blissful, relieved. And I don't know why, but my first instinct was to search for Niall. He met my gaze almost instantly, taking his eyes off of his guitar as he played. He smiled just barely, the left corner of his mouth curling up the tiniest bit. He was smiling just for me, and I was smiling back without even realising it. I could feel my eyes getting watery, so I blinked rapidly to get rid of the moisture and turned back to the audience in time to start singing the second verse.
By the time the show was over, I was drenched in sweat. My feet were killing me and my heart was beating erratically, so loudly I could hear it in my ears. I did a short speech, thanking the audience for being so welcoming and thanking Chiara for bringing me on board. I once again expressed my excitement over the tour before taking the final bow with the band. We'd always stand in the same places, Leigh on my left and Niall on my right while the rest lined up next to them. I had gotten used to feeling Niall's hand on the small of my back at the end of every show as we bowed. This time, he seemed to be closer than usual, his arm wrapping around my waist. It didn't give me time to think or react, my shoulder pressing to his bicep as I kept holding the mic in my right hand. We all broke apart in a matter of seconds, but I was still aware of how close Niall had gotten to me in front of so many people. It made me nervous that someone would notice. I tried to dismiss the worry, telling myself I was being irrational.
Once we were backstage, everything seemed to be just as chaotic as before. Chiara found me before she went on, praising my set and expressing her excitement over spending time with me on tour. I've met her a couple times before, but she always seemed to be too energetic of a person. It made sense, because her latin songs and intricate choreography required just that type of person. She asked me and Louis to go to dinner with her after the show, so we waited. I showered again, this time not washing my hair and got Gina to redo my makeup. By the time I was out of the shower, Louis had dismissed the band back to the tour bus, which would be leaving a few hours after the show was done. I tried to not feel disappointed when I discovered Niall had left before I got out of the shower.
After Chiara's set was over, we got a taxi to a mexican restaurant nearby. She brought her boyfriend and manager along, bringing our group to a party of five. Paparazzi didn't miss the opportunity to photograph us as we were leaving the venue, but that was just more exposure for me. I got to know Chiara a bit better, and Louis got to do some business talking with her manager. Chiara kept joking how both of them seemed to be the same amount of workaholics. I had to agree. Her boyfriend was very quiet, barely ever talking unless he was addressed directly. He was a major contrast to her, who was probably one of the loudest and most lively people I've ever met. Keeping up with her and all the conversations she constantly started was mentally exhausting. Along with my jet lag and the physical tiredness, I could barely keep my eyes open when I got to the tour bus.
I barely acknowledged anyone, saying hello to no one in particular when I entered the bus before saying I was tired. I didn't even turn to look at any of them, walking past the TV that was playing some sort of film as I went to my bunk bed. I grabbed a few of my things and went to the bathroom to use it, change and brush my teeth before I went straight to bed, my body feeling fragile and ready to give out once I lied down. I groaned in relief, the pain from my feet and back instantly beginning to subside. I pulled the red velvet curtain closed and turned off the small light before turning towards the wall, tucking my arms close to my chest and breathing out deeply. I was ready to sleep, about to drift off soon after.
"Lex, you up?" The hushed words were barely loud enough to get my attention before I lost all sense of my surroundings. Disoriented, I rolled onto my back and looked at the source of the voice. I wasn't surprised to find Niall was the one to disturb me, pulling the curtain almost all the way open and letting the dim light of the crammed corridor in. Rubbing my face, I frowned in annoyance.
"What do you want? I'm really fucking tired." I grumbled, hoping to get rid of him quickly. I noticed then that he was shirtless, which probably meant he had been at his bunk before coming here. The faint sound of voices and the TV playing told me that the rest of the band were still up.
"Oh good, you're awake." He smiled, beginning to climb up into my bunk. I sat up, looking at him strangely.
"What are you doing?" I probably talked a bit too loudly. I realised that when he shushed me, sitting at the edge of the bunk bed.
"Mind moving over a bit, I'm about to fall off here." He said it like it was the most obvious thing in the world. Though still confused, I did as he told me and scooted closer to the wall, my shoulder pressing into it. He moved closer to the centre, pulling the curtain closed.
"If you came in hopes of getting a round two, sorry to disappoint but I'm too tired. Plus, I don't think we can manage to be quiet enough while everyone is awake." I muttered, trying to tame my irritation as I fluffed up the thin duvet I was covered in. He grabbed the edge, pulling it over his lap that was clad in just basketball shorts. I knew him well enough to guess he wasn't wearing anything else under those. I let him have half of the duvet as he lied down against my pillow, his chest sinking as he released a breath.
"Do I have to wanna have sex to spend some time with you?" There was some hint of amusement in his tone, but he still looked offended. I didn't know what to answer. I clearly didn't think that. We've spent time alone doing other things, including an unsuccessful couch shopping trip. But every single time, our one and only purpose was to end up in bed together.
"You don't?" I didn't mean for it to come out as a question, and the uncertainty in my tone only added to the creasing of his brows.
"No. I didn't come here expecting anything. I was planning to just go to sleep." He shrugged his shoulders, what he was telling me so casually leaving me a bit shocked. I didn't let that show on my face, didn't question him why he wanted to sleep with me instead of his own bunk. It was better for me to not know the reason.
"How do you expect us to both sleep here? The bunk is tiny." I commented instead, gesturing around the small space with a chuckle. The bunks on the bus from my last tour weren't enormous, but they were definitely roomier than these. Niall shrugged again, digging his phone out of his pocket and placing it inside the net on the wall before hr shuffled further down the bed, lying down flat.
"We can make it work. You sleep on your stomach anyway, so lie down on me." He patted his chest, opening his arm up to invite me towards him. I stifled a laugh, biting my bottom lip.
"You want me to sleep on top of you for the entire night? How are you supposed to move?"
"Don't worry about that. Just come here." His persistence didn't leave room for me o object. Reluctantly, I lifted the duvet enough to move around, freeing up space for him to scoot to the centre of the narrow mattress before I rolled on top of him. I curled one leg over him, my chest pressed to his stomach as I laid my head onto his sternum. The scent of his worn out cologne and his body heat engulfed me, drowning me in the familiar comfort of his presence. His arm fell over my back loosely, the other tucked under his head and the pillow. His breath fanned over the top of my head, his chest rising and falling from under me.
"Comfortable?" He whispered, sneaking his hand under my shirt to let it rest on the small of my back. He drew shapes with the rough pads of his fingers, sending tingles up my spine. I hummed in appreciation, letting my eyes fall closed. My breathing slowed down as my body relaxed. I became drowsy in a matter of minutes, m ytiredness overtaking my body and lulling me into the state of almost falling asleep. But I was interrupted again when I felt him stirring from under me a while later, my eyes shooting open.
"Am I crushing you? I feel like I'm crushing you." I chuckled awkwardly, planting my palms on either side of his torso on the bedding to push myself up. He shushed me again, reinforcing his hold from around me to pull me back down.
"You're not crushing me, I just wanted to make sure the curtain was closed." He whispered, his face mere inches from mine. Even in the darkness, I could still see the jewel like shade of his eyes sparkling.
"But keep your voice down. The rest are getting into bed." Upon having him say that, I noticed the muffled chattering from the other side of the curtain, realising it was Ty and Louis talking. Ty's bunk was right across from mine, Louis' at the end of the corridor towards the back. It hit me at that moment just how close they were, how easy it would be for one of them to just pull my curtain open and find me lying on top of Niall. I held my breath, nervously clinging onto Niall's shoulder. My breathing grew a bit unsteady from how nervous I was feeling, my attention focused on the passing voices on the other side as I heard Leigh joining the conversation and Perrie saying goodnight.
"Hey." Niall nudged my chin with his knuckle, getting my attention in that way. I turned to look up at him, my eyes still wide from how anxious I was. He was smiling, a lopsided amused smirk decorating his face as he kept his knuckle under my chin.
"Kiss?" He whispered, puckering his lips at me. If I wasn't worried at being heard, I would've laughed at how childish he sounded. He's asked me to kiss him a handful of times, but never so casually and with no other motive other than distracting me. Realising that was the reason he was asking, I sighed and scooted up just barely to reach his mouth.
It was the first time Niall and I kissed where neither of us parted their mouth to deepen the kiss, to add tongue or to create any form of tension. The only movements our lips made were soft and tender, the kiss feathery and gentle. It was the simplest kiss I've shared in years, my eyes falling closed as he pressed his lips to mine gently, his arms wrapping around my waist to press me to him. I mindlessly looped a finger under the short chain on his neck, my hands pressed on his chest as I melted against him, hearing my heart beating in my ears. It pushed away any other outside sound coming from the bus, and I realised it had fallen quiet in the few seconds we kissed before Niall pulled back, resting his head onto my pillow. He loosened his grip from around me, curling his arm under the pillow again before closing his eyes.
"Go to sleep. We have a long three weeks ahead of us." He was subtly smiling through his hushed words, aware that he had managed to distract me enough I didn't even notice everyone had gone to bed. I shook my head in disbelief, allowing myself to relax against his chest. I finally managed to fall asleep after a while, having no more interruptions.
•••
When I woke up in the morning, I was all alone in my bunk. The space was tiny, but it still felt empty and void with just me in it. Disoriented as I was, I took a few minutes before getting up. The second I pushed the curtain away, I faced Ty sitting at his bunk, his laptop in his lap and a pair of headphones around his head. He glanced at me and smiled. I returned it, jumping down from the high altitude and heading for the bathroom. I glanced down at Niall's bunk by the floor, but it was empty. I had no idea when he decided to leave, but I hoped no one saw him.
Once I was done with the bathroom, I headed all the way to the front towards the living space. Most of them were already there, having their breakfast and chatting. Louis was the first to spot me, greeting me. That had everyone follow suit with the greetings. Jillian and Perrie weren't there yet, and I assumed they were both asleep.
Niall, however, was. In the same basketball shorts as last night and a tank top, he was standing in front of a counter with his back towards me, He didn't spare me more than a glance when everyone greeted me, but I reminded myself that was for the best. The less interactions we had in front of others, the more unbothered and uninterested we acted to the other's presents, the more easy it would be to hide what was really going on between us.
"Did you sleep well?" Leigh asked, sat between Jillian and Duncan on the couch with a mug in her hands.
"Yeah. I was out the second I got in bed." I chuckled, making my way towards the kitchenette to make tea. Once I approached, Niall turned around and walked the other way, towards the small table Louis was, who kept following me with his eyes.
"You woke up just in time. We should be in Wyoming in an hour." He told me, taking a bite of his apple. I nodded, turning my back towards the living space and reaching for the kettle to make some tea. My hand froze mid air when I saw my mug already on the counter. It was one I had brought from home and always used. It was a mug with a hand drawn rainbow, my name written in cursive along it. Harry had given it to me years ago, so long it was actually surprising I still hadn't broken it.
It turned out I didn't need to make tea for myself. My mug was already full with the piping hot beverage, a bit lightened with a splash of milk just how I liked it. I stared at it for a second, the counter under it wet with spilt over water. And that was what gave it away. There was one person that always left a mess behind when he made tea. One person that knew exactly what kind of milk and exactly how much I like in my tea. And he was sat across from Louis, casually scrolling through his phone.
I smiled to myself as I took out the soaked teabag, dumping it in the trash. I took a cautious sip, humming in appreciation at the comforting taste of the first sip of tea in the morning and joined the others on the couch, doing everything I could to avoid glancing at Niall. I relaxed into a corner, listening in to the ongoing conversation about last night's show.
I had this odd feeling in my stomach, like a tingle. It made me feel excited, nervous and giddy all at once.
⁜⁜⁜
Hey! What do you guys think of the new cover? I decided it was time for a change.
Thanks for reading!
~M