"Code Blue NICU, code blue NICU."
I jotted up, clutching my chest. The room was pitch black dark.
I realized I was only reliving a nightmare in my sleep after dealing with it in real life. Hours after my kids were brought into this world, something went left and Kemora didn't make it. They said her heart just stopped pumping. It was only so much they could do to try to revive her, but sadly nothing worked.
"You okay?" Lex asked still in a sleepy state.
"Yeah..." I answered wiping the sweat off my forehead.
I didn't want to alarm her. She had already been through a great deal with all the shit going on. She was still hurting and so was I but most days were filled with tending to Jr and making sure he's straight. Despite the loss of his sister, he still brought us joy. Tha' type of joy you need to help you get through the worst of days.
It's been 8 months and life was a lot more calm than previously. I let go of the reigns a lil and Keon does more. Drako even stepped back a lil too with a lil one on the way. Kimora was 4 months pregnant and even more annoying now that she was pregnant.
"I woke you?" I asked in a whisper.
"I had a dream about our baby girl. It woke me up... I was holding her and Kemoni was there. She was being just a good big sister to her baby sister...."
I sighed, "I know she would've been, look at how great she does with Jr."
"Yeah..."
It killed me on the inside, knowing it's nothing I could do to take away the pain we was feeling. She was feeling.
I leaned back down and tried to head back to sleep. However as I closed my eyes the sounds of crying came from bassinet beside the bed. Lex won't let Jr. out of our sight.
"He must've heard us talking about his sister... hey did you hear us?" Lex asked.
I loved seeing her in mommy mode. It made me laugh at times to think she was so worried at first. Just like I tol' her, her instincts kicked in.
"Mommy and daddy are right here... you getting so big man. Mommy wants you to be a baby forever."
"Lex Lex and Daddy can I sleep with you?" I heard from the other side of the door as it crept open.
Lex finally cuts a light on, "Yeah come on Moni." She said.
I looked at Jr and how amazed he was with his mother. Those big dark eyes stared into hers. I already know if anything ever happened to me, Jr. would be there to protect his mama and sister.
He was tough but when it came to his mama and sister, he melted. I just had to make it my duty when he got older to show him how to not let anybody other than those two get away with it.
"My lil solider," I said putting my finger in front of his as he grabbed it.
"Lil soldier nothing. My baby boy is going to be an athlete and we're going to the NBA."
I laughed, "Bae, really?"
"You saw him throw that paper away the other day."
"He was tryna get up and fell down with the paper in his hand and the trash bag just so happen to be right in front of him."
"Sounds like you hating," she laughed, "No one told you to not go pro."
"I had other stuff to do," I responded.
"Daddy I wanna play," kemoni said sitting in between us.
"What you wanna play lil girl?"
"Hmm.... Ima be a... dance girl."
***
I walked in the room to find Alexis standing over the crib. I made my way to her and slithered my hands around her waist. She looked back but I knew she already knew it was me.
"Why you watching my son like a creep?"
She laughed, "Shut up. I just laid him down," she turned now facing me.
"You good?" I asked looking into her eyes.
"I'm better. How are you?" She said wrapping her arms around my neck.
"Long as y'all good, I'm good."
"But are you really good?" She asked.
I thought on it for a second, "Yeah, today is a good one. Some days shit is a lil sketchy."
"Yea, I get it... I miss this." She said laying her head against my shoulder.
"We can stay just like this for forever."
As ready as she was to take me down in the hospital room, that was it. She ain't wanted to be touched in any type of way. We just started back hugging a few weeks ago.
"I wish, I got to get ready to do Kemoni hair and Kimora wants to come over to chill."
"You kicking me to the sidelines like a lil bitch?" I asked slightly offended yet questioned it jokingly, everyone was getting her time but me.
She laughed, "No, I would never. Kimora is going to keep the kids tonight and then you can have me all to yourself."
"Till Jr. get up."
"Jr. Is going with his TT."
My brows raised, "Bae you ready for that?" She ain't been away from him ever. She literally cried when the doctor said they wanted to weigh him one visit and we had sit in the room. He was gone for .5 seconds and she went crazy.
"I've already talked myself out of 4 times but we need some us time. It's been 8 months."
"Long ass months too."
"My point."
"All of you, just to myself?"
"Yup."
"I like the sound of that," I said pecking her lips quickly, "You just let me kno' what you need and it's all yours."
"I just need you to be back home by 7."
"You got it boss."
My phone rang causing our moment to be interrupted. Lex also shoo'd me out the room so the loudness wouldn't wake up Jr.
"What's up Nigga?"
"Mr. Family man, aye. Pull up."
"You real funny for a nigga who can't walk straight."
Drako laughed, "Damn it's like that? Sheesh, thought I had a brother for life."
"Forever nigga. I'm bout to dip out and head that way. We got some checking up to do on these lil niggas."
"Always with it. We takin' yo whip."
"Aye we need to stop and see Ramon too." That was my dealer I got most of my cars from. I'd been working on getting Alexis a truck. We were out riding back to the house from a doc appointment and she saw it, instantly loving it. She was joking saying Bae get me one, but lil does she know.
We wrapped up our conversation and hung up. I finished getting dressed and headed out the door.
"Bae, I'm about to head on out!"
"Okay, call me when you make it."
"I might," I responded back knowing she'd have some to say.
"Don't play Kemari," she said changing her nice ass tone to a more stern tone.
"Alright you win. I love you."
"I love you too."
***
After hours of being out I headed back to the house. I had Lex new truck taken care of and squared some other things away. I even talked to Big Unc about pulling up on them for a few days. Alexis was gone be pissed as hell for me being late. She told me to be back and I was pulling in two hours after the fact.
I went to turn into my driveway but noticed a small sliver car parked a lil distance off up the street. Instinct told me not to get out turn yet. Some just ain't feel right.
I kept going straight and passed the car, trying to see who it may have been. To no luck their windows were tinted darker than mine.
I kept going heading back to the main road. I hit Lex name.
"What?" She answered.
"It's just you home?" I asked.
"Me and damn Casper. Who else gone be here Kemari because it's not you."
She was mad, mad but I would have to deal with that later.
"Alright, stay inside. Might jus be random but some don't seem right. I was about to pull in till I and noticed a car parked up a distance ahead. I kept going and headed back up the way."
I looked in my rear view and didn't notice anyone following my car or anything.
"K."
"I'll be there shortly. Call me if any shit even looks off."
"Yup."
She hung up the phone. I pulled into Publix lot and headed inside. I checked my surroundings before and didn't see the car or anyone looking suspicious.
Maybe I was tripping but ima be safe rather than sorry. Shit couldn't have been random.
I headed to the bakery section and picked Lex up a cake and then went to the flowers. I checked out and headed back to the house.
The car I saw before was gone.
Shit definitely wasn't random.