Aliya's POV
The crowd went wild at the announcement, as if they had been waiting so long for such news. Cheering and clapping like it was the biggest moment of the century. I assumed they didn't know about the arrangement until now, it must've been kept between the royalty and their trusted advisors.
Each and every person in the hall was gleaming with excitement, looking at each other while gossiping amongst themselves.
Damien's subjects, men and women alike, his council, and the other members of the royal families, they all anticipated one thing.
Who would be the next vampire queen?
But I couldn't care less about everyone else's reaction, all I wanted to know was how did Damien feel about the declaration.
He was quiet; probably the most still and bewildered I had ever seen him. Even with the distance between us, I could feel how uncomfortable he felt in this situation.
I don't know why but his reaction shocked me.
To my surprise, he wasn't fighting back or putting forth an argument; or forcing the members to take back their words.
I was used to the Damien who was always so composed and ready to fight anyone who would defy him. But that control was slipping through his fingers and he could not do a single thing about it.
I wanted him to be in control.
But that wish felt too far fetched as I saw him sitting there, shackled to the throne and bounded by the endless legal obligations.
He opened his mouth to say something, but caught himself as he took in the audience's reaction one more time. Then, he stood up from his seat, walking forward as he started to climb down the stairs.
The noise that filled every corner of the room started to die down. The court members also stood up and bowed their head in respect to their king. But Damien did not even glance in their direction and looked straight towards the exit across the room, his eyes fixated on the huge doors.
He crossed the room in a couple of strides, and left without mustering another word.
"This is beyond crazy," Emma who I had forgotten was still by my side shook her head in disbelief and said, "my brother never walks out like that, looking so... defeated."
It pained her to say the last word, because even she knew the word defeated and her brother did not belong in the same sentence together. Swallowing the lump in my throat, I found my voice again.
"I'm going to go make sure he's okay," I gave her arm a supportive, gentle squeeze.
Turning towards the exit, I pushed through the rows of people who seemed too astonished to even move. I ducked and went around some, my heart suddenly rushing while there was only one person on my mind, who I had to find. Hoping to catch Damien in his tracks before he disappeared.
Finally making it out of the throne room, I looked around to find no sign of him. Picking up the pace, I started to run in the direction where Emma and I came from. My hands reached out to push open the wooden doors that led me further into the castle. There was a maid with a tray of fruits on the other side, who stepped back in fear from the sudden movement.
"I'm sorry," I apologized to her for almost making her drop her plate, now clearly out of breath, "have you seen Da- his majesty?"
Nobody called Damien by his name, they referred to him as their king or his majesty. So I caught myself before his name slipped my tongue, not wanting the maid to think I was being disrespectful. Or worse, grow suspicious of our relationship.
Our relationship... I wasn't sure we had much of a relation to even consider that.
I was his mate and he was my-
What was he to me?
"I saw his majesty going towards his study, with Princess Iliana," the maid replied.
"Oh, okay, thanks," I said, looking towards the direction she came from.
My mind was on alert, debating if I should follow them or let them be.
The maid nodded and proceeded to walk away.
What was Princess Iliana doing with him? Did they have something important to discuss?
Wait a second...
Now I know why that name ringed a bell, my mind flashed back to Emma's bridal shower.
A girl with blond hair and icy blue eyes spoke up, "yes, I don't know how my mom found out. And she has been trying to set me up with the king since last night, even though getting married is like the last thing on my mind right now."
"You can't be serious, Iliana, your mother is trying to set you up?! What is this, the 18th century?"
Iliana nodded, "she even managed to somehow arrange a date for me tonight, she was going on about it this morning."
I couldn't go to sleep that night, thinking about where they might have gone on their little "date", but Damien showed up in his balcony in an unspeakable state. And he did not look like he was coming back from a fun night out.
Maybe they were making plans to rearrange the date they both missed last time.
Curiosity got the best of me, and my feet brought me all the way up to the king's study.
The doors were closed, blocking out the answers to all my questions as to what they were doing or talking about. My eyes followed the weird patterns carved onto the set of doors as I bit my lower lip. They spoke to me in an unknown language among the utter silence. For a second, I thought about turning back and checking on him at a later time.
Right as I took a step back, someone pulled the doors apart which made my head snap up again. The small gap between them revealed the only person who I wanted to see at the moment.
Damien.
"Aliya?"
The surprise in his voice and his wide eyes confused me. Something told me he knew I was here the moment I stepped foot in this hallway. Was it the supernatural sense or something else?
Before I could acknowledge him, my eyes landed on the figure behind him. He wasn't alone in the study, an annoyed-looking Iliana was standing inside the room. With her arms folded, she leaned back, carelessly putting her weight onto the desk. A chic, sophisticated dress hugged her curves, the white fabric falling off her shoulders to reveal her glowing, fair skin.
Damien followed my gaze and looked over his shoulder, "will you please excuse us?"
The princess tried her best to hide the shock that washed over her upon hearing his request. She straightened herself up, her block heels harshly stomping against the hardwood floors as she walked over to us.
Her cold, blue eyes met mine and she gave me a smile that seemed more fake than genuine. From the way she was looking at me, she was expecting me to greet her like the princess that she was.
There were others in this palace who might bow before the royals and kiss the floor beneath their feet, but I wasn't one of them. There wasn't anything wrong with respecting the royals, but respect must be earned. Not promised from your title and good looks.
I did not know her, and neither was I burning with a sudden desire to get to know her.
Realizing I was in no rush to offer my soul to her like she expected me to, she turned towards Damien and placed a hand on his shoulder. I saw him tense up immediately, shrugging it off his shoulder lightly.
"Do think about my offer, your highness," she mumbled beneath her breath, her words coated with sugar for only Damien to hear. But her attempt to keep it a secret failed since I was standing close enough to hear it.
What offer was she talking about?
Damien nodded, but his mind seemed elsewhere due to the lack of eye contact that he was making with her. She could sense it because without wasting a second more or even shooting me another glance, she gracefully exited the study.
When she was out of our sight, Damien pulled me in by grabbing onto my arm and slammed the door behind me. Keeping his hand there while his body trapped me between him and the door, the handle digging mercilessly in my back.
"What the hell were you doing in the throne room?" His voice reminded me of the numerous threats he would give me with the same tone months ago.
"Emma said you were in trouble. I was-"
"You were what?! Did I say I needed rescuing, especially from the two of you? Know what, it's not even your fault. I need to have a chat with my sister after this. She must've lost her mind somewhere when she dragged you into this mess," his eyes got narrower with every word he said, now glaring at me. Or maybe the anger was directed at Emma, I wasn't sure anymore.
"You're not going to say anything to her, she was just looking out for you. And then we both were worried when you left so suddenly," I explained, trying to make him understand where our concern was coming from.
"I don't need anyone looking out for me," he brought his face closer to mine, to make sure I heard him loud and clear. My eyes were pleasantly greeted with the golden crown that was still on his head. It was more beautiful from up close, providing a majestic glow to his face. The admiration only lasted for a second as his words registered in my mind.
"It won't make you any less of a king to accept help sometimes, or even show that you need it."
His jaw clenched, making it sharp enough to slice my finger. That wasn't the only thing that appeared sharper, his veins running through his arm were even more visible as his hand fisted, still planted onto the door.
The reaction made me want to take back my words. It appears as if we had walked two steps forward and then three steps back, on this long journey that we unwillingly found ourselves on. This whole mate thing twisted our fates together, but it was getting harder and harder to untangle the pieces.
Damien was furious and I didn't want him to do something that will make me go back to hating him. I thought we were past that, just when I was starting to think being his mate wouldn't be the worst fate possible, I was standing here reconsidering my choices.
As an attempt to get away from him, I pushed myself further into the door, but winced as the handle dug deeper into my back.
"What the hell?" He pulled me forward by the waist, as soon as he saw my discomfort. His hand massaged the exact area on my back which was hurting. He shot me an annoyed look, as if I hurt myself on purpose.
"How did you..." I started.
How did he know where I was hurting?
Never mind, there were a lot of things that I didn't understand about this world. And this just happened to be one of them, it was better to accept that than to try and uncover the veil over every little mystery.
"Because your pain is my pain, dammit. You seem to forget that a lot," he claimed, but continued to rub my back gently with his thumb. His touch felt really nice, and it almost made me forget what I was going to say next.
Almost.
"I don't forget it, but you keep denying the fact that your pain is my pain too, dammit."
His midnight black eyes met mine, as he pulled his eyebrows together and focused on my face. Feeling the heat creeping up my neck being under his intense gaze, I tried my best to ignore it.
"I just wanted to make sure you were okay," I whispered.
Damien shifted his weight back and released me, allowing me to take in the breath that I had been holding being under the pressure of his alluring eyes.
"Yup, just fantastic. You?" He asked over his shoulder since he was already turned away from me, walking over to the side that had a mini bar setup. I watched as he poured himself a drink just as the sun had barely risen up, not believing the scene before my eyes.
Slamming the bottle down on the table, he turned towards me again and gulped down a big sip from the glass. Feeling my eyes on him, he offered the glass to me. To which I shook my head instantly.
The hell was wrong with this guy?
"It's barely 10 o'clock in the morning," I reminded him, walking a little closer.
"I don't see how that concerns me, but okay," another sip, I could almost feel the alcohol burning down his throat.
"Drinking isn't going to help," my words seemed to have the opposite effect on him, as he finished the contents of his glass in one go.
"Then what will, you? Are you going to pull out your magical wand and poof, it's raining pixie dust and we're sliding down a fucking rainbow?"
His eyes landed on me again, "sorry to break it to you, princess, but that's not how it works here."
He opened up the bottle and started to pour some more alcohol into the glass. His actions were harsh, treating the bottle like it wouldn't break apart into a million pieces if it got shattered. Or maybe he didn't care even if it did.
Perhaps that would be enough to block out the sound of his own heart breaking.
"I'm not dumb, I know it doesn't work like that anywhere. But what is the alternative, you sitting here drunk out of your mind to forget about what just happened, and replacing your pain with anger just because that's easier to face?" I asked him.
As if not hearing a word I just said, he slouched himself down onto the sofa chair. From the way he was acting, he knew I was right, but his pride was getting in the way of him accepting the truth.
I sighed at his stubbornness, dropping down onto my knees so I was at his level to which he replied, "what are you doing?"
His hand reached out to make me stand up, but I grabbed onto it and held it between both of my palms. That seemed to finally get his attention, as his eyes fixed upon mine.
There was so much anger in them, burning bright against the darkness of his iris, a raging fire that held the power to destroy everything he set his eyes upon. It was only a wonder how I wasn't dead yet.
The layers of agony and anger were tough to remove, making it impossible for me to reach him. So I asked him the only question that popped in my mind at the moment.
"Why are you so mad?"
He brought the glass up to his lips but stopped to process my question. Then he placed the glass onto the side table, creating a loud bang while keeping his hand there clutching onto it.
"I don't know, I'm on the verge of losing everything I've ever owned, snatched by a bunch of morons who think they know my kingdom better than me. Why would I be mad? I'm fucking chilling," his last sentence was filled with venom. His eyes were digging into mine, and his face had somehow gotten closer to emphasize his strong features.
"Fine," I stood up from the kneeling position and grabbed the bottle from the bar table, "if you think this is going to help, then so be it."
Snatching the glass from his hand, I poured every little drop of the remaining drink into it. Damien looked at me utterly confused, his eyes dropping back down to the glass as I slammed it on the table just like he had a few seconds ago. He stared back at me with concern showing in his eyes, no not the "are you okay" type of concern, but more like the "do I need to take you to the mental hospital" type.
"Drink it," I urged him, "until you can't even remember your name and don't have the control over your own body or mind. Because that's what they want, for you to lose control so they can gain more power. And you're falling right in their trap."
"What do you suggest I do, behead them? Can't really do that when half the kingdom wants the same thing. There's nothing I can do now. I've already lost control of the situation," he said, already looking defeated.
He was about to run a frustrated hand through his hair but stopped when he realized the crown which sat proudly on his perfect hair, "and you know what makes me fucking furious? They have the audacity to take away my crown, which I've devoted my entire life towards. The only thing that has ever belonged to me, my throne."
"Nobody can ever take that away from you, your subjects love you and they'll never approve of someone else taking your place."
"They'll forget about me, just like the past kings. But for me, the throne gives me a purpose. I am not sure I am anything without it. It's the only thing that hasn't betrayed me or left me in the dark. Even when nothing in this world makes sense, I can always confide in my titles and my duties. They define me," his voice dropped lower, he seemed more calm now. But I knew one wrong move and it would turn into the calm before a storm.
I had to choose my words wisely.
I kneeled in front of him again, reaching up to place my hands on either side of his face to make him look at me. To an outsider, it was a simple touch, but nothing was ever simple with this man. One small touch was enough to cloud my thoughts and force me to get lost in his presence.
It reminded me of our closeness last night, how he made sure I was warm enough after spending God knows how many minutes or hours out in the snow. That was another thing, even though it had been a long time, when I was with him time seemed to move slow. But not slow enough, I selfishly wanted it to be perfectly still.
The way he was looking at me, I wanted to freeze this moment.
"The throne isn't your power, it's only a fancy chair whose honor gets elevated with your presence. You make it more powerful, more dignified," I told him, emphasizing the last sentence to get my point across.
He was listening, so I pushed further.
"Your father, even though I hate him for what he put you through, there is one thing that I find myself agreeing with him on. And that is knowing your worth. He saw the potential in you, and he picked you to be the next vampire king for a reason, instead of his own son. His methods were very wrong, but all along he believed in you, to lead this world onto greater heights. And you did."
My fingers dropped lower down his face, until my thumb rested on his jawline as I cupped the back of his neck.
I brought my face closer to him, our noses almost touching.
"Just like I believe in you. It's not the biggest crown or the fanciest throne that makes a good king, it's the biggest heart. And I know you're not lacking in that department," I gave him a small smile to lighten his mood.
The surprise was visible in Damien's eyes as he took in what I just said, I held his gaze to prove that I meant every word from the bottom of my heart. There was a small hint of yet another emotion in his eyes, which I wasn't familiar with. But I was glad to see his anger finally replaced by something more pleasant.
"You don't get the option to give up so easily," I shook my head.
"You're the fucking vampire king, start acting like it."
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