Chapter 19
Kate
I didn't recognise the place as we walked down the staircase; the lighting was dimmed with candles all down the stairs and around the room. Royal blue everywhere around the room, with white and blue roses and silver drapes falling like a waterfall room the ceiling. If it wasn't for the French doors looking out on the terrace I'd have thought it was a different room. It's amazing how this was the same room we were in just the other night. It looked like a fairy-tale. As we walked further into the room I could see the attention of detail around the place. Tall trees where brought it where white and blue butterflies where attached looking like they were flying around the tree like a little pixie home.
It all looked magical.
Music danced its way around the room of light jazz music that was being played by the band on the stage at the front of the hall. I found myself getting swiped away by the magic of the room that I had no idea what was going on around me. Jay was guarding me along with him as he started talking to different groups of friends he knew. I smiled and introduced myself but after they would talk about some subject I know nothing about and I'd start drifting off again looking around.
It was then that I saw the room attached to the ballroom where couples were dancing around in a waltz. God I've never seen dancing like that before. It wasn't the same type of dancing at the club, I thought giggling to myself a little. It looked amazing, the way that everyone was dancing around so gracefully and elegant like that, I wish I could do that.
"It's beautiful isn't it?" I had to turn back round to the group Jay and I was now with to see who spoke. I turned to see Jay's Mum and Da with another elderly couple. It was Jay's Da, Mark that spoke so I agreed smiling at his comment about how beautiful the dance was.
"Would you like to dance?" Mark laid out his hand smiling.
"Oh thank you but I don't know how to dance like that" I smiled nervously. I know I wanted to dance like that but I knew I couldn't. I have two left feet Mickey always said. That's why he never wanted me as one of his dancers... also because I wouldn't remove my clothes.
"Well I happen to be very good and it's all about leading. Come now lets dance" he grinned at me still holding his hand out. I looked up at Jay to get his approval; as soon as he nodded slightly telling me it was ok I took Mark's hand.
"Let's go" his big warm hand was held lightly in mine as he lead me to the dance floor. We started off on the outside of the floor.
"Now you put your hand on my lower shoulder... like that and your other hand in mine like this" he said holding my hand in one hand and the other lightly on my waist. He pulled me a little closer but not so much that we were touching. I was lucky I was wearing high heels or I don't think I could reach his shoulder.
"Now when I move my leg like this..." he said bringing this leg towards me. "You move back and if I step back like this... you come with me" he explained as he simply moved back twice and forwards again. "That's it, now we are going to move a little faster so we get a little rhyme" my nervous got the best of me then as he moved and I didn't and then again I stepped forward as he did causing us to collide.
"Sorry" I laughed nervously, looking down at my feet. "I did warn you"
"You're doing perfect. Much better than Lilly or Sally when I first taught them to dance" he laughed pulling us back to the beginning steps. After a few more mistakes and a stumble here and there we were finally dancing around the room.
It felt amazing, I felt like I was as light as a feather. I looked up at Mark and smiled, one of the first true smiles since being here. It was strange, I was in a dress that I couldn't really breathe in, with a bunch of people I didn't know as well as being in the arms of a stranger I only just met but I felt relaxed.
"You're a natural" he smiled down at me in a kind sweet way that I imagined a Da should look at his daughter.
"I've got a great teacher" I laughed. "Thank you for teaching me"
"That's quite alright my dear, it's nice to finally spend some time with you. I feel like I know nothing about the woman that's made my son so happy" he grinned happily and I suddenly felt guilty, if only he knew the only thing I've done is make one of his sons miserable.
"What would you like to know?" I asked trying to run by the story Jay and I had made up in my head that he wanted everyone to know.
"What makes you happy?" he asked, knocking me back a bit. I didn't see him asking me that... I didn't really know what to say. I tried to think what Jay would want me to say...
"Your son" I replied making him laugh.
"What else? Tell me your idea of a perfect life" what a strange thing to ask someone, I thought. If I was honest the answer would be... my idea of a perfect life would just be getting by. Not having to worry about paying the bills or how I was going to eat for the next couple of days. It would be having a clean, safe warm flat and a job where I worked hard and well at. In a dream world I'd like to have my own bakery and enough money to start living my life but really I just wanted to know the act of getting by.
There were other dreams too, dreams that I didn't let myself think about much. A dream that I wanted more than any other dream...
"I guess my idea of a perfect life, my dream life would be yours" I said without really thinking.
"I see" he gave a small smile.
"Not your money... or power but your family... I'd like to have a family one day. I've been alone for most of my life with only harshness around me, no love or laughter. I'd love to have a child that I would care for... like a child should be treated, with love and compassion. I'd teach them good and bad and safe them from all the bad and evil in the world that was possible. It would be the most amazing feeling in the world to have a family that cared as much as yours do about each other. To wake up and go to sleep every night knowing that there was someone in the world looking out for you and loving you with all their heart. It must feel so warm and safe..." I didn't notice how much I was talking until I felt the tears start to build in my eyes. I shook my head quickly laughing at myself looking back at Mark who was staring down at me with a worried and caring look.
"You'll have all those things Kate, that I can promise you" he gave me this strange look like he was plotting something in his head as he spoke before giving me a cattish grin.
"Maybe" I looked back at the floor.
"Most people I ask that to never give me a true answer or if they do it's mostly about money or fame"
"Those things aren't important. At the end of the day money and fame it just a way of living not actual life" I had to tell myself that every day I wished for money to just find its way in my lap at home. Money is what makes the world move but even without it the earth still spins. Life keeps going you just become strong each day you're without it.
"My son's a very lucky man"
"Why's that?" I grinned.
"Because you my dear are one of a kind" he said making me blush.
We danced another song before a hand stopped on Mark's other shoulder pulling us to a stop.
"May I cut in?" Jake stood next to his father looking me up and down.
God he looked incredible. He was wearing a black smart suit that brought his broad shoulders and a white shirt on his hard chest. He wore a black bow tie and his hair was pulled neatly back making my fingers titch to run my finger through to make it messy again. He was looking at my face now and his eyes where shining with an emotion I'd seen far too much since knowing this man... lust. And God help me but I knew he could see the same in my eyes too.
"Of course but you be good Jake, remember who she belongs to" Mark laughed as he placed my hand in Jakes large strong hand. Mark walked away just leaving us move standing at the side of the dance floor. I couldn't move... my heart was doing its own little dance inside me that brought my breathing uneven.
Jake pulled me into his waiting arms, much closer than his father had before, our chests where touching and suddenly we were moving around the dance room his eyes never leaving mine. He hadn't said a word and neither had I as the song came to an end and we stopped moving. I dropped my hands from his and took a step back out of breath. He still just stood there... not saying a word or giving away way type of emotion as he just stared at me.
"Excuse me" I said turning away from him before nearly running into the closes toilets. I went into one of the stools and sat down trying to breathe.
What the heck was that about? The moment was so intense and... hot I felt like the whole room was on fire and I was court in the flames. Hell I was the flame. The way he looked at me... it was different some reason. I've seen lust in his eyes before or at least something like it but this time he looked like he was in pain over it... he must be trying to fight it or something. I don't know... or maybe it was disgust. I was so confused I couldn't even think what had just happened. Whenever he gave me that look before it would end with him kissing me or some cruel comment but this time... he just looked at me. A way a man looked at another woman. Like he was just Jake and I was just Kate.
Just as I managed to get my breathing right again I heard the door fly open and somewhere deep inside, I thought it was Jake coming after me to have is way with me... I really needed to stop thinking about him in that way. I knew from working at the club that a guy didn't need to like you to lust over you but Jakes hatred grow more than that, he loathed me.
My thoughts were brought back to the swinging door and a girl's voice that I recognised as Leah's before she started crying again. I let myself out the toilet to see her leaning on the sink crying.
"Leah?" I called to get her attention. She jumped as she noticed she wasn't alone in the toilets. "What's wrong?" moving closer to her to make sure she wasn't hurt or injured. She shook her head and tried to put on a smile to pretend that everything was ok before she started to cry again. I walked over to her pulling her into my arms to calm her down a bit.
We stood there for about ten minutes when the door opened and Gemma and Lilly walked in laughing about something until they saw us.
"God, Leah. What's wrong?" Gemma said rushing over to us. "What's wrong with her?" she asked me, I just gave a shrug and confused look.
"I'm... I'm f...find. I'm j...just being sill...silly" she tried to say.
"Hey, it's ok. It's it your family?" Gemma said. We were all in a circle now rubbing her back to comfort her. I wasn't very good at this type of thing, I didn't know what to say or do when people cried. "Is it a guy?"
"Or a girl?" Lilly said making Gemma glare her way, me and Leah just laughed.
"No it's not a girl. It's just everything, seeing my family again after so long... and just everything I guess. It's all hard. I just want to leave this place after tomorrow" she said and I felt the biggest disappointment inside me at the thought of her leaving the party early. We had grown close these past couple of days and I felt like she and I were more similar than anyone else in this place.
"No!" we all said at once
"I know, Chris told us about your family and what happened. I'm so sorry Leah" Gemma said. I was lost but I didn't need her to explain right now.
"So you don't believe what they said about me?" she asked as I past her more tissue to whip her teary face.
"I don't believe anything that comes out of Jessica's mouth or her evil friends, Leah" Lilly said.
"Hey I've got a good idea. Me and Lilly were just talking about going to the little town that's about twenty minutes away tomorrow in the morning. I know it's your Granddads birthday but would you like to come with us. And you Kate"
"Yeah, that sounds great. I think Granddads busy all morning anyway" Leah said as I just nodded smiling. Another shopping trip, great I thought sarcastically.
"Great I need to get some... thing in one of the shops but there are some boutiques in the town. Have you got something to wear tomorrow night?" Gemma asked.
"I do but it wouldn't hurt to look" Leah said
"Great so tomorrow will be a girly day. We should go shopping and then we should all get ready together. Cocktails, dancing and maybe a little gambling, it will be fun" Lilly said.
"Great ok I'll get Mum to look after the kids and I'll drive us all into town about half nine" Gemma said.
We all agreed to meet in the lobby at nine thirty.
Leah and I both decided to go back to our rooms to sleep. We were both walking to our rooms laughing when Leah asked about tomorrow.
"Are you excited for tomorrow's shopping trip?"
"Yeah... well if I'm honest no not really" I laughed nervously.
"Why?"
"I'm not very good at the whole... being girly thing. I've never had friends before and if I'm honest Lilly and Gemma scare me" I said making her laugh.
"They are a little bit mad but aren't we all"
"Yer I guess so" I giggled.
"Right this is me. Night Kate. I'll see you bright and early in the lobby" we kissed cheeks as we went to our rooms.
"Night"
Jay was still down stairs with his friends, I told Lilly to tell him I'd gone to bed before we parted in the toilets. I got in the room and as soon as my head hit the pillow I was out like a light. Dreaming about dancing around a ballroom all night in Jakes arms...