"Son." Rick got Austin's attention as he poked his head in Deanna's room. "It's time."
"Okay." Austin gave Deanna his best smile. "I gotta go now. Keep your rag."
"Thank you." she held his wrist with a weak and pained smile. "Do me a favor, Austin."
"Anything." he nodded down to her.
"Try not to hate everything anymore." she touched his face. "You have so much light in you."
His eyes softened. "It's hard."
"I know it." she promised. "But, you can do it."
He squeezed her hand, standing up to leave Rick with her a moment. Carl met him with a white sheet, helping get them walker guts spread on him. "Do you want to take Judith?"
"She's most quiet with you." Michonne pointed out.
"Okay." he walked closer to take her. "Under the sheet you go, little lady."
"Mom?" Sam gave a frightened look as he came around the corner.
She frowned, walking his way. "You need to listen to me, okay? We aren't safe here anymore. Okay, we need to do this so that we can be safe out there. We need to look like the monsters."
Austin and Carl shared a look, because they both knew the fear of being young and not understanding.
"No, please, no." Sam started to cry as he shook his head.
"Yes, honey, we have to go, okay?" Jessie attempted to comfort her son the best she could. "We have to, Sam. Honey, just-just pretend you're brave. Okay? Just make it all pretend. Okay, none of this is real and you're somebody who isn't afraid."
Austin wondered if that was a good tactic to follow, if her words truly could work. He didn't think so in the end, it was ease to pretend, but when it was happening all around you, reality over powered the fantasy world you made up in your head. He thought about what Deanna said, the light he had, if it had been there.
"Hey, Sam." Austin got the young boys attention, Ron stiffened up in annoyance. "Come here a second."
Sam walked closer as Austin kneeled down infront of him. "I know that it's scary out there. When I was your brothers age, I was really scared of the monsters too. You want to know how to beat em?"
Sam nodded. Austin gave his best smile. "Pretend everyone is in their underwear."
Sam laughed, Austin grinned as he stood up. Jessie gave a thankful look, Ron seemed like he just wanted to smash Austins head in.
The walk got a little easier when they joined hands, Austin eyed the walkers around him as they went for the front door. He feared a possible rain storm headed their way, like last time. It made him wish Glenn had been here, how much easier life would be if Glenn was here. Carl held his hand tighter, Austin squeezed it.
They kept their heads down, breathing to a minimum. Rick lead the group toward a corner, trees surrounding them. It would be safe to whisper. "All right, new plan. Flares from a few guns aren't enough. Too many walkers, too spread out. We're not going to the armory. We need our vehicles back at the quarry. All of us drive. We'll need to round 'em up. We leave. We come back."
"Okay." Jessie nodded as she looked at him. "But Judith..."
"I can take her to the bar." Austin looked to his Dad. "It's close and it's secure. Carl can come."
"I need at least one of you." Rick shook his head.
"Carl and Judith can go and i'll go with you." Austin promised him with a blink.
"No." Carl shook his head. "If she starts crying, you know how to help her more."
"Well i'm not gonna leave you." Austin stated at his little brother in disbelief.
"Austin." Carl nodded his head. "It's okay. I'll be fine. You need to put Judith first."
"I will take Judith." Gabriel spoke up. "Keep her safe in my church until you all lead the walkers away."
Rick nodded. Austin did the same. "Thank you, Gabriel."
"Can you do this?" Michonne looked back.
"Im suppose to." Gabriel gave the best smile he could in a moment like this. "I have to. I will."
"If she starts to cry, a little hum to any song will usually calm her down." Austin whispered as he got Judith under Gabriels sheet. "We'll be back soon, little lady."
"Take Sam." Jessie spoke up.
"No." he stated immediately.
"Yes, Sam, it'll be safer." she looked down at him some, Austin shhed her as she spoke a little louder.
"I'm not leaving you." Sam stared up at her. "Mom, i'm not. I can keep going."
Austin thought about Lori.
Jessie shared a look with Rick, her youngest begging to stay with her. Gabriel nodded. "I'm going to keep her safe."
"Thank you." Rick whispered, Austin held his breath as Gabriel walked away.
"He's gonna make it." Jessie promised Rick as he slipped away a moment. "I know it."
"Sam." Rick held his hand out for the youngest, Austin held Carls and Jessie's hand as they continued through the crowding walkers as the sun went down. Austin squeezed Carls hand every few seconds, almost making sure he was still right there behind him.
It was harder to identify walkers in the night, but Rick had been doing a relatively well job as he continued to lead them toward the quarry. Austin worried for Sams sake, he truly did wish he'd gone with Gabriel. When he froze still, Austin realized that someone should have just made him gone. Jessie tugged on his hand. "Sam. Come on, come on."
He started to cry. Rick shook his head. "You can do it."
Austin looked back at Carl as Jessie and Rick continued to try and help Sam. Ron leaned past them. "Sam, you can do this. Just look at Mom."
"Honey, you can do it." Jessie promised.
"We're almost there, kiddo." Austin whispered to him with a nod of his head. "Just a little longer."
"Sam, you're gonna get-" Jessie started, cutting herself off as Sam started to whimper and cry. "I need you to come with me."
"I want to." Sam cried. It pained Austin for the sight of him. He was still so young, he hadn't experience the world out there like him and Carl had. He was safe behind Alexandria this whole time, he didn't know any better then to freeze in fear and not be able to move. Only, that had gotten him killed, walkers sinking into his skin.
Austin lost Carls hand as his eyes went wide, his heart rate jumping. Jessie wailed out as her boy was eaten right infront of her. Rick tried to get her to move, but she couldn't. Austin knew he needed to help right now but couldn't find a way to. He couldn't imagine what this feeling was. Loosing his mom and lover was bad enough, the last he could imagine was his child being gone.
Jessie froze as walkers took her, ripping her apart. Rick started to cry when she was taken down. Austin shut his eyes for a moment, hoping she'd go soon, hoping she'd be with Sam again. Ron. He thought of Ron as he spun around quickly. Only, he didn't have time to think about him because his own brother was struggling, Jessie's hand still attached to his wrist.
"Shhh." Austin got closer, hacking at Jessie's wrist to get her to let go of Carl. When he broke free, his arms wrapped around Carls head and held him close for a moment, keeping still and quiet to avoid another death. The sound of a gun clicking had caught his attention, looking over Carls hat as Ron pointed a gun at possibly Rick, possibly Austin.
He let Carl go, grasping his own gun in his pocket. Ron stared. "You."
Before Austin could shoot him, Michonne impaled Ron with her sword as the gun went off in his hand. Austin sighed in relief, mainly for Ron's sake in those moments. He'd have had to gone on living without his father, without his little brother, without his mother. Loosing Lori was horrible on Austin, if he lost Rick and Carl as well, he'd have never made it.
Only, that feeling of relief for Ron didn't last when his own little brother turned to him, a bullet wound through his eye.
•
kylie speaks
i always wonder what it
would have been like if
ron had lived. i have this
weird feeling he'd have joined
the saviors bc negan manipulated him but then he'd
find his way back to alexandria
and had gotten along with
henry bc he reminded him of
sam