Will's P.O.V
Sam looked really stressed. He called after Danny, who didn't respond. "What's happening?" I asked, frowning. "He's- he's..." Sam stuttered, looking unfocused. "I have to find him," he said. He sounded really worried. I had no idea what the fuck was going on. "I'll help you look. You take the east wing, I'll take the west. I'll call you if I find him." I said, and set out on the manhunt for Danny.
There was half an hour left until fourth period. I couldn't find him anywhere. I gave up and started walking back to the cafeteria. As I was walking, I heard sobbing and from the janitor's closet. Shit, that must be Danny. I opened the door to find Danny, hugging his legs tightly. He was breathing really heavily, and he was sweating a lot.
"Shit." I whispered under my breath. "Danny." I said, he didn't hear me. "Danny! Look at me." I said. I didn't want to touch him. I knew that it would probably worsen his state. He glanced up at me, his eyes red and puffy. It broke my damn heart. I didn't know what to do or say in this situation.
Grabbing my phone, I searched hurriedly through my contacts and found Sam's number. I called him and he picked up immediately.
"Is he hurt? Where are you?" Sam answered immediately, panic in his tone. I searched Danny's body for any evident injury. "No, he's fine. We're in the janitor's closet, 2nd floor. He's having a panic attack."
"Fuck. Fuck. Shit, this is all my fault."
"Hey, Sam. You need to calm down. Danny needs you."
"James is the one who knows how to handle this, n-not me."
"You're a strong guy and your brother's having a panic attack."
"I-I can't. I just- I-"
"Sam, breathe. Have you seen James do it before?"
"Y-yes, but-"
"No buts. Tell me what to do."
"Okay. Okay, you're right. First, ask him for 5 things he can see. I'm on my way."
"Okay. Danny," I turned to his curled up figure on the floor. "Danny!" I said louder. He snapped his head up, fear in his eyes. Shit. "I'm sorry. Can you name 5 things you can see?" I asked him. He gasped for breath then nodded. "You... a... a mop... the d-door... bucket... trash bag."
"Okay. Now ask him for... for 4 things he can touch. And encourage him."
"You're doing really well, Danny. Now can you name 4 things you can touch?" I asked him gently. "Floor... w-water... shirt... metal." Danny breathed. He looked like he was in so much pain. Fuck, I couldn't stand this.
"Ask for 3 things he can hear."
"That's really good, Danny. Now, what are 3 things you can hear?" I said softly. "Your voice... a d-door opening... s-someone laugh-laughing." I could tell he was calming down a little. I smiled at him. "Excellent."
"I'm almost there." Sam panted as if he had been running. "Ask him for 2 things he can smell."
"What are 2 things you can smell?" I asked Danny. "Bleach... sandalwood." He said, his breathing considerably less erratic. "You're doing so good, Danny." I encouraged.
"Ask him one thing he can taste."
"What's one thing you can taste?" I asked Danny. "Pizza." He said. Right, the school lunch. He breathed in and out deeply. "I-I'm s-so- sorry." He said, his eyes shiny with tears. His nose was red. All I wanted to do was hug him, he looked so fragile. "Hey, hey. It's okay." I said, sitting down next to him. "I was worried about you," I admitted quietly. It was rare for me to admit anything. "D-don't get all soft on me." He smiled at me, trying to lighten up the mood. I chuckled and cleared my throat. "Yeah, like that'll ever happen." I scoffed. He leaned on my shoulder tiredly. I smiled. He was comfortable with me.
Sam came running in, panting heavily. He looked at Danny, who was on the floor, sitting with his knees to his chest and his head on my shoulder. He then looked me in the eyes. Not gonna lie, I was kind of intimidated. "Danny." He whispered, looking away from me. Danny looked up at him, and I was disappointed when I couldn't feel the heat of his body against me. I shook my thoughts away.
"You're okay." He said, relieved. "I'm sorry to have worried you." Danny said quietly. "You don't have to apologise, Danny." Sam said. "Do you want to go home?" He asked. Danny shook his head. Sam frowned and asked, "are you sure?" "Yeah. I need to- I need to use the bathroom. Excuse me." He said, and passed by Sam, who still looked worried.
He looked at me. "I don't care if you have feelings for my brother. Just- just don't hurt him." He said with a warning glare, and before I could reply, he left me there alone in the janitor's closet. I stood there for a few seconds to process what just happened. "What the fuck?" I said out loud.
•••
Danny's P.O.V
I couldn't believe how many times I've worried people like that. I hated how vulnerable I had been and how sympathetic everyone I've met was. Why couldn't they just get mad at me? Just punch me? I fucking deserved it. As much as I hate to admit it, I kind of miss foster care. At least then, I had an idea of what the people would do to me. I washed my face at the sink.
Sam looked so worried. I sent him a text, apologising again. He told me that I shouldn't apologise. He was being so nice, and I was an absolute jerk. I was having a nice time. Sam was having a nice time. Then I had to have a panic attack, out of nowhere. He was probably so much happier before I barged in on his life again. They all were.
In my pit of self-pity and despair, I made my way to class. I was walking so fast, I was almost running. Bumping into someone, I held them from falling, as they were much smaller than me. "Danny? What's wrong?" Lily asked me. "Nothing. Sorry, did I hurt you?" I asked. "No. Are you sure you're okay? You look-"
"Sorry. I have to go." I said, not meeting her eyes. As I was making my way past her she grabbed my arm to stop me. I tensed and she let go. "Seriously, Danny. What happened?" She asked, worried. There goes another person I've burdened. "I'm fine." I smiled, "just in a bit of a rush, sorry." I tried my hardest to conceal my emotions. I've been good at it all my life, except for recently. I didn't know why this was happening.
"Bullshit, Danny," she said, but was interrupted by someone. "Lily, what's taking you so long?" It was her red headed friend. "You should go. Really, I'm fine." I told her. She bit her lip, conflicted. "Fine, I'm letting this go for now. I really do hope you're okay, Danny," she smiled sadly and allowed herself to be dragged off by her friend.
I swallowed my rising emotions and made my way to the cafeteria, grabbing my bag wordlessly, then heading toward English class. I was the first in class. I pulled out a book from my bag and started reading to pass the time.
Halfway through the chapter, I realised that I didn't actually understand anything I was reading. My mind was too preoccupied by my previous meltdown to focus. The teacher walked in class with 5 minutes left in the lunch break, and set down her laptop with a stack of papers.
She looked startled to see me there. "Oh, hello!" She said cheerfully. "Hello, Ms." I said quietly. "I know my memory isn't great, but I'm sure I would remember a face as sweet as yours if I had had you earlier. Are you new?" She said. I simply nodded. "What's your name, dear?" She asked. "Danny Clark." I replied. She looked through the attendance sheet, as Mr. Patel had done. "Well, it's my pleasure to have you in class." She said, smiling warmly.
"Thank you. It's a pleasure to be here." I replied politely. I smiled slightly. "Are you okay? You seem kind of sad. I'm sorry, if you are feeling down. I hope things look up for you soon." She said. She seemed like a genuinely nice person. "Thank you." I replied quietly.
"It's quite nice to have someone as polite as you." She said. "Oh, I'm Mrs. Henderson, by the way." She smiled. I froze. She looked old, maybe old enough to have taught Michael. But, there's no way... I guess she could read my face, because she chuckled. "I'm glad to have taught Michael and all his sons." She said knowingly.
"I- uh-" I was speechless. "You don't have to say anything." She chuckled. I nodded. "So, what are you reading?" She asked. "Crime and Punishment by Fyodor Dostoevsky. Well, rereading, actually." I muttered. "You like classics?" She asked. "Yes, mostly. But I'm open to most genres." I said. She looked surprised. "It's not everyday you meet a kid who likes classics. I have recommendations." She said. She searched her large tote bag and unearthed a book. She placed it in front of me. "The Brothers Karamazov, also by Fyodor Dostoevsky. Have you read it?" She asked. "No, but I've been meaning to." I told her. "Well, you can borrow it now, if you like. Give it back to me unharmed, alright?" She said. I shook my head. "It's okay, you really don't have to-"
"Come on! I want to see if you can write a mind-blowing essay on it, okay?" She insisted. "Thank you." I said, and took the book from her hand. "Think of this as a Charlie and Mr. Anderson situation." She smiled. The Perks Of Being a Wallflower.
The bell rang, signalling the end of the lunch break. Putting the book gently in my bag, I waited for the class to start. Mrs. Henderson seemed to be preoccupied with her paperwork. A few people started filing in, and amongst them, to my horror, was Lily. She spotted me, and walked toward me then sat in the seat next to me. "Didn't think I'd let you off the hook that easily, did you?" She said, and smiled sweetly. Oh, god.